The cabinets are waiting for me when I finally get to them at the end of the day on Monday. I’ve made if from Z through K. I’ll be starting J tonight and working my way to A. I’m farther behind than I thought I would be. I only have two weeks before I leave, and since I was gone over the weekend, I have some major catching up to do. With a fresh cup of coffee in my hand, I settle in for a few hours of reading.
I spend most of Tuesday and all of Wednesday in the records room, my work load light for a change. About the time I’m ready to call it a day on Wednesday, I open the last file behind tab G and scream. The folder falls to the floor. I lean over to pick it up and read it over again.
G. Lucy and Grant. Winter Park, Colorado.
There is no doubt in my mind this isn’t them. It has to be.
We wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for you. You’re grandma was going to send us to Colorado.
Grant’s voice echoes in my ears, words he spoke after thanking me. I didn’t even remember until now that they were supposed to go to Colorado, and they would have if I hadn’t begged Grandma to let them stay. All this time I should have known where to find him. He left me clues, just in case they had to leave again. I wonder what else he told me that I’ve forgotten that might help me.
I take a picture of the information and clean up the room before heading home. I want to celebrate, but it doesn’t feel right without Grant here and I can’t tell anyone I’ve found him. If I do, they’ll want to know how. If I tell them how, then they’ll know he’s part of the program. That could compromise the integrity of the Foundation and everything it stands for.
Nope. I’m just going to go home, eat ice cream, and start packing. I leave for school next Friday, so it’s time. Once I get there, I’ll be headed to Winter Park to visit a long lost friend.
***
Libby hugs me tight, tears streaming down her face as I pat her on the back in an attempt to calm her down. I’ve already promised to call her every day and we plan to video chat on the weekends. She’s headed to Raleigh tomorrow for school. I’m glad I won’t be here to see her off. I can only imagine how emotional she’s going to be saying goodbye to her parents and to Chester. He’s headed to California.
The day Libby found out he got into UCLA, and was planning on going, was not a very good day for anyone. Chester got the brunt of her rage, but I was a close second. She was yelling and screaming. She threw her phone against the wall and shattered it before asking if she could borrow mine to call Chester back. I gave it to her only after she threatened my life. Thankfully, she didn’t throw my phone after she hung up on him again.
We’re all venturing out on our own. It’s a little sad. This is the first place that’s felt like home to me. I’ve made friends here that will last me a lifetime. I made memories that will last even longer, and I now remember parts of my life that had been hidden in the shadows for years. I’ll never forget the last year. Even with all the ups and down, I wouldn’t trade it for anything. In the end, everything is going to be okay. I can feel it.
“I have to go, Libby. I’m going to miss my plane if I don’t get on the road.” I try to push her away, but she holds on tight.
“Libby. Let her go,” Chester scolds. I don’t miss the nasty look she shoots him as she pulls back.
“Promise me that you’ll call me as soon as you get there.”
“I promise. Now, promise me that you’ll be nice to your roommate.”
Libby sticks out her bottom lip and shakes her head. When Libby contacted her new roommate to introduce herself, she got blown off in a big way. The girl basically hung up on her and told her she would see her at school. Libby got pissed at me for that. She said it was my fault since I wasn’t going to the same school as her. It’s my fault she’s stuck with a shitty roommate.
“If she turns out to be a complete bitch, I’m transferring schools. Make sure there’s room in your dorm for me.” Libby has been threatening me all summer that she’s going to come live with me if her roommate sucks. I’m keeping my fingers crossed they’re able to get along.
“Noted.” I turn my attention to Chester, unsure of how to say goodbye to him. I don’t feel close to him by any means, but we’ve spent a lot of time together over the last year. He was Grant’s best friend. I should acknowledge that in some way. “Take care of her for me, Chester.”
“I will.” He opens his arms and I walk into them, allowing him to hug me. “Take care of Grant for me,” he whispers. I suck in a breath at the mention of his name and slowly let it out so Libby doesn’t notice. She’s watching us suspiciously right now. I’m not sure how he knows that I found him. He’s always been the silent type, observing but never commenting on what’s going on. He must be more intuitive than I’ve given him credit for.
Ten minutes later, after two more breath-stealing hugs, I’m finally able to close the car door and my dad hits the gas. I saw him laughing at Libby behind her back the entire time she was saying goodbye to me.
Saying goodbye to my father is bittersweet. He’s retiring from the Marine Corps this winter and is planning on retiring in New Bern. To stay busy, he’s thinking about working part time at the Foundation. We’re starting a surveillance team and I’ve asked him to conduct all the training for new employees. I want us to be able to keep people safer so situations doesn’t arise in the future like what happened with Grant.
By the time I come home next summer, it should be fully operational. My father seems excited to be a part of the Foundation, and I couldn’t be happier to have him helping. That also means that he’s staying in town and taking care of the house for me.
“Well, Madison. This is it. Once you pass through those gates, you’re going to be off to college, on your own.” His attempt at enthusiasm is appreciated, but I can still hear his apprehension about me leaving.
“I know. It’s kind of scary.”
“Even though you’ve been on your own for a while now, I want you to know that I’m only a phone call away if you need anything.”
He’s told me this multiple times over the last few weeks. Once I told him that I found Grant, I think he got jealous. Grant’s going to be closer to me in distance than my father. He’ll be there for me if I need him. I think my father’s afraid that things will go back to the way they were, before Grant left. I’ve promised myself I won’t let them. I like the relationship we have now. We’re stronger than we have been in years, and in a way, we have Grant to thank for that.
“Love you, Dad,” I say as I hug him tightly.
“Love you too, Bug. Call me when you land.” Kissing me on the forehead, my father pulls back and smiles at me.
Bug. He hasn’t called me that in years. Closing my eyes, I see myself as a little girl. I’m running through the yard. My mother is chasing behind me. She looks happy. I look happy. My father is sitting in a chair on the patio laughing.
She’s going to get you, Bug. You better run faster.
Then it hits me like a ton of bricks. The accident. The hospital. I’m remembering everything and I’m overwhelmed. Now is not the time. I can’t handle this right now.
“Everything okay?” Looking up at my father, I can see that I’m starting to worry him.
Shaking my head, I reply, “Yeah. Just tired.”
“Get some rest on the plane, okay? Love you.”
I wave at my father as soon as I’m safely through security and on my way to my gate. My chest is tight, my heart beating rapidly. I take a few deep breaths and let them out slowly. It doesn’t help, so I rush to my gate and take a seat, placing my head between my knees, closing my eyes.
I see the truck. It’s coming at us fast. I hear Grandma scream, but I don’t look at her. I’m staring at the truck, eyes wide with fear, knowing what’s about to happen. It slams into our car and I feel it in my chest. My head hits the window and everything fades to black, the world going silent around me.
“Now boarding, Southwest flight 499, nonstop service to Denver, Colorado. We would like to invite our fi
rst class passengers to begin boarding now at gate A6. Thank you for choosing Southwest Airlines.”
Sitting up, I dig my boarding pass out of my purse and walk to the gate. The friendly woman behind the podium makes a second announcement before scanning my ticket and waving me through. Walking down the tunnel, I try and focus my attention on Grant, college, and my future. I shake away all memories of the accident, but my chest continues to ache, no matter how much I attempt to ignore the pain of my past.
As soon as we’re in the air, I lean my seat back and close my eyes. Grant’s hazel eyes and sexy grin are all I see as I drift off into slumber.
“Please, Bug. I need you to wake up. I need you here with me. Open your eyes.” My father pleads with me as he holds my lifeless hand in his.
“She’s going to wake up, Michael.”
Whipping his head in my grandma’s direction, my father glares at her, anger radiating from him in waves. “You don’t know that, Mother. The doctors say it could be months or even years, and that’s if she wakes up.”
Wise to not reply, my grandma sinks down into her chair. Her leg is propped up on a stool in front of her, a cast spanning the length from her thigh to her ankle. She winces in pain as she attempts to get comfortable.
I look over to where I’m lying, lifeless. There’s a tube down my throat breathing for me. I’m hooked up to machines that beep annoyingly. One is monitoring my heart beat, another my pulse. The last one looks as if it’s monitoring my brain activity. Even hooked up to everything, I look like I’m sleeping peacefully.
A man in a white coat enters the room, announcing his arrival. “We have some of the test results back. I’m sorry to say that there’s been no change in her condition. We are going to continue to monitor her as we have been and run more tests in a few days. I’m hoping that we’ll see some signs of improvement then.”
“Hoping? You’re hoping for signs of improvement!” His answer, not good enough for my father, causes him to lash out.
“Mr. Thompson, I know that I don’t need to remind you how seriously Madison was injured. Her brain was starved of oxygen for at least five minutes. If she does wake up, there could be severe trauma that we don’t know about yet. She may never be the same as she was before the accident. We are going to do everything we can for her, I promise. What I need for you to do is keep talking to her and try your best to stay positive. Getting agitated and upset won’t help her.” The doctor keeps his voice calm, but he also takes a step back as he speaks.
I laugh to myself. No one talks to my father that way. He’s in charge. I wait for him to stand and punch the doctor, but instead I watch as he folds into himself and cries, calling my name over and over again, begging me to wake up. I cry alongside him as I watch, knowing that there’s nothing I can do to take his pain away. Nothing except wake up.
Wake up, Madison. Wake up!
“Miss, I need for you to wake up.” I open my eyes to find an older brunette hovering above me, smiling. “We’ve landed in Denver. Do you need any help gathering your things?”
“No thank you,” I reply, looking around to see that I am the last person left on the plane.
After grabbing my bag from the carousel, I wave down a taxi and give the driver the address to the dorms. He attempts to engage me in conversation, but I ignore him, staring out the window as the city passes me by. I’m finally here. I should be excited. I’m anything but.
Ducking and dodging as people move boxes and furniture, I make my way up the stairs to my room. The door is wide open when I arrive so I knock on the frame as I enter. A perky blonde bounces over to me, wrapping me in a hug.
“You must be Madison,” she hollers, reminding me of Libby.
“Amy, right?” I try to sound excited to meet her. I know I fall short the second the words come out of my mouth.
“Yeah. You okay?” she asks as she takes a step back, tilting her head at me.
“Tired.” It’s the only answer I can muster.
“Well, it’s a good thing all you had to bring was your bag then. Two hotties moved all your stuff in about an hour ago. You should have seen them,” she says in a dreamy voice, looking far off into the distance.
Amy is a talker. She tells me all about herself, her boyfriend that she left back home in Vermont, and her family. She’s a really nice girl and I think we’re going to get along great. When she finally takes a break to run and grab food, I relax on my bed and stare at my boxes in the corner, willing them to unpack themselves. When they don’t, I get up and dig until I find my sheets.
By the time Amy returns, I’ve unpacked one box, made my bed, and changed into comfortable clothes. It’s more than I thought I would get accomplished tonight.
“Want to put in a movie and relax?” she asks, taking in my appearance.
“Sounds perfect.”
It takes all of five minutes for me to fall asleep. I try to stay awake, feeling like I owe it to Amy to at least spend a little bit of time with her our first night together, but I don’t have the willpower. I’ll make it up to her tomorrow, I promise myself as I drift off to sleep.
“Dad,” I mumble.
“Madison!” I hear him scream. “Madison, say something.”
“Dad.”
“Oh my God! I need to get the doctor. Don’t fall back asleep, Bug. I need you to stay awake. Can you open your eyes for me?” I feel my father’s shaking hands cupping my face as he speaks.
My eyelids feel heavy as I struggle to open them. The light slowly starts to peek through and it’s really bright, so I close them again, wincing in pain. “The light,” I gasp.
My father’s hands leave my face and I hear footsteps all around. The door creaks and then I hear my father yell into the hall for the doctor. “I need a doctor. She’s awake!”
Moments later he’s back at my side, talking to me, asking me to stay awake until the doctor comes in and if I can try and open my eyes again. Focusing on one eye, I get my lid to cooperate and a white ceiling begins to come into focus. The other follows moments later, just as a man in a white coat walks in. I turn my head, my father’s tear streaked face the only thing I can focus on.
“Madison, it’s nice to meet you. I’m Doctor Harris.” Turning toward the sound of the voice, I’m surprised to find a young doctor standing on the left side of my bed. “I’m going to put my fingers in your hand and I’d like you to squeeze as hard as you can. Can you do that for me?”
Sure. The word comes to mind, but I can’t seem to get my voice to work so I nod. I feel him slide his fingers in my hand and I squeeze.
“Good. That was very good,” he says, looking at my father. “I’m going to ask you to do a few other things for me, okay?”
The doctor spends the next hour torturing me, making me play stupid games and flashing a light in my eyes. By the time he’s gone, I’m ready to go back to sleep, but my father begs me not to.
“Dad,” I whine. “I’m so tired.”
“I know, Bug. I need you to stay awake and talk to me for a bit, though. You’ve been sleeping for so long. I need to hear your voice and know that you’re okay.”
“I’m fine. I promise.” I attempt to smile at him, but I know it doesn’t pass inspection the moment he frowns in response. “Fine, I’ll stay awake for a little while longer. My voice hurts, though, so you have to do the talking.”
“Deal.”
“Will you tell me what happened?”
He hesitates for a moment before deflecting the question back to me. “What do you remember?”
“The last thing I remember is mom’s funeral.” He tries to hide his shock, but I catch it before he recovers. “What am I missing?”
“About three weeks, Madison. We buried your mother three weeks ago.”
My alarm is blaring in my ear. I open my eyes, confused by my surroundings for a moment, before I sit up and get my bearings. Remembering where I am and what day it is, my smile begins to grow. Today is the day I’ve been waiting nine months for.
“I get to see an old friend today, that’s all.”
“What’s his name?” she asks teasingly.
Good question.
Chapter 20
Living in a dorm is interesting. I find out quickly that the best time to shower on a Saturday morning is early. The bathroom is full of girls beautifying themselves by the time I get there. It smells like chemicals, fruit candles, and burnt hair. That’s better than the alternative, but the air is so heavy it’s almost nauseating.
I step into the stall and pull the curtain closed behind me. Listening to the conversations going on around me is distracting me from my own thoughts. I try to block out the noise and focus on what I have going on today, but it’s almost impossible. Quickly finishing my shower, I redress, gather my things, and make my way back to my room.
I’m about to open my door when I hear voices coming from inside. One belongs to Amy the other to a male. I’ve been gone less than twenty minutes. When did she have time to invite a friend over? The better question … what am I about to walk in on?
Knocking before turning the handle, I open the door to find Amy on a video chat with her boyfriend. That makes more sense. I apologize for interrupting and slide over to my side of the room to finish getting ready. I can’t help but listen as they tell each other how much they love each other every five seconds, making me think about my own situation.
Would Grant and I be like that given the opportunity? I’m sure we would. I can see it now … video chats and sappy text messages. Phone calls just to hear each other’s voice. Making plans to see each other as often as possible.
I think about all the time we’ve lost the last year. One phone call would have made my heart ache less. One letter in the mail. To know he was safe and he was thinking about me would have made the pain of losing him bearable for a small amount of time.
I run my thumb across the scar on my forehead as I perfect my makeup. It seems to have faded slightly over the last year, blending in with my hairline enough that it’s barely noticeable. A constant reminder of the accident, it’s something I’ll always see when I look in the mirror, no matter how much it fades over time.
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