by Emilia Finn
“Day after Christmas, ask me again. We’ll set it up.”
“Set what up?” I look to Mac. To Lucy. And frown when they grin. “What am I missing?”
“Day after Christmas, you and Mac can fight. Don’t worry about it, Iowa.” Evie slaps my shoulder and knocks me forward a step. “Just roll with it. This time next week, we’ll know.” She stops and stands on her toes to look through the crowd. “Where’s Brooke? She’s coming, right?”
I nod, and point straight up to the second level of the club we stand in, to the top of a set of metal stairs, where there’s an office. That office has a window that overlooks the octagon.
Standing in the window, Brooke carries Lyss on her hip, and waves when our eyes meet.
“Aw, ain’t she just the cutest thing?” Evie snickers. “Baby Brooke beat us all to the baby-making.”
“Well…” I cough to clear away my nerves. “I did. She wasn’t involved.”
Evie bursts into laughter. “Maybe next time, you could include her. Then we’ll get some blue-eyed Kincaid babies.”
I frown. “Their last name would be Walker, though. You know that, right?”
Mac throws his head back and laughs. “These women around here, they’re kinda attached to their own name, Iowa. You’re gonna have to sweet-talk Brooke into dropping Kincaid.”
“Or drag her down the aisle with a rag soaked in chloroform pressed to her face,” Evie jokes.
“Whatever works, Miss Kincaid.” I tap her shoulder when Brooke waves me closer. “I’m going to talk to my girl before my fight. I’ll be down when you step up.” I give her a half hug, since she’ll be fighting for the title just before me. “Smash it. Win that belt.”
“You got it. I’ll be busy celebrating when it’s your turn, so… same. Smash it, prove to me that I made the right choice bringing you to town.”
“You made the right choice, I swear. I’ll prove it.”
She grins, nods, and turns to Ben when he steps toward our group.
I turn away, to walk a lap around the room to avoid having to walk straight past the guy I’m supposed to be fighting, only to stop when a hand lands on my arm and pulls me back around.
My eyes pop wide. “Karla?”
It boggles my mind, knowing that this is the same woman I once loved. That she’s biologically Lyss’ mom. That she’s who I would have spent the rest of my life with if she never walked. Not because I felt for her even a fraction of what I feel for Brooke, but because it would have been the right thing to do. I made a baby with her, so I would have stayed; I would have supported her, I would have remained faithful, and since I would have never met Brooke, I wouldn’t know the happiness that I know now.
You can’t miss something you never had.
“Miles.” She looks up at me through puffy, red eyes, and brings a hand up when she sniffles. She’s been crying. She’s hurting. “You can have her.”
I back her toward the wall so we’re not being jostled by fighters. “Hey. Are you okay? Why are you crying?”
“You can have her, Miles. Free and clear, you can have her.”
“Who? Brooke?”
She nods. Cries. Then shakes her head. “Alyssa. You can have them both. I’m going to sign the papers that your lawyer wants me to sign.”
“What papers do you mean? Why are you here?” The noise grows around us as the fight in the octagon comes closer to the end. “What’s going on?”
“I didn’t know how to help her, Miles.” Her shoulders bow in when she bursts into sobs. “I didn’t know how to help her when she was a baby, and I didn’t know how to help her at the school. I don’t know how to be a mom.”
“You just…” I swallow. “I mean, we learn. We learn on the job. That’s how I learned.”
“She would have died in the car if she was with me. Brooke saved Lyss’ life, she did all the stuff, and I only watched. If I get custody of Lyss, then maybe it’ll happen again. Maybe I’ll freeze up again, and Brooke won’t be there to make it better. I don’t…” She wipes her face. “I don’t want my daughter to die, Miles. I don’t… I don’t know how to be a mom, but I know how to let her go so someone else can be that for her.”
“Karla…” A ball of emotion forms in my throat until it makes it hard to breathe. “You don’t have to do anything. You were scared that day. So was I, and so was Brooke.”
“But she still did what she had to do, Miles! She did it, and I watched.”
“If you’re nervous about being alone with Lyss, then maybe we could all do it together. Ya know, like how you took Lyss to the park and Brooke came too. We could do that, but more. You could visit our house and stuff.” Shut up, Miles. Shut up! “We have a spare bedroom, so if you wanted to spend the night with Lyss, that would be okay.”
“You’re in a new relationship, Miles. You’re happy.”
“I know. And she would never say you can’t come over to see our daughter. She’s selfless and amazing, Karla. She’s perfect, and in her perfection, she would make it so you and Lyss could spend time together.”
She shakes her head. Rejects my words and takes a step back. “If I sign her away, and you marry Brooke, she could adopt her, right?”
“What? I… what?”
She nods. “If you marry Brooke, she can adopt. I’ll only sign the papers if you promise to do it that way.”
“I can marry Brooke either way, Karla. You don’t have to sign anything. You don’t have to do this.”
“I want to.” She takes another step back. “I can’t be a mom. I don’t know how, and I don’t know how to try. My mom…” She blows out a breath. “My mom doesn’t have her best interests at heart. She doesn’t even have mine. I need to break the cycle.”
I step forward. “Karla…”
“It’s going to be okay, I promise. I’m going to be selfless.” She tries to smile, but it’s shaky and sad. “Like a real mom. I’m gonna do it.”
“Karla, just stop for a second. Fuck.”
“You’re frustrated with me.” Finally, her eyes meet mine, and her smile is real. “That’s how you used to sound when we were younger. ‘Fuck, Karla.’ ‘Just stop, Karla.’ ‘Be careful, Karla.’”
She steps forward and rests her hand on my shoulder. Then she pulls me down and presses a long, silent kiss to my cheek. “You were the best person I ever knew. I swear you were.” She lowers back to flat feet, and wipes tears from her cheek. “I’m happy you found happiness.”
“I would have stayed with you.”
“I know, and I think that might be why I ran. Because you wouldn’t have. You would have stayed, and then I’d have had to live knowing you weren’t truly happy.” She looks over my shoulder, to the office above us. “And now you found it. You brought Lyss along for that, and you found the right one for you. I’m so happy for you.” She reaches up to wipe my cheek. “I’m seriously happy for you. I know it doesn’t look like it right now, but I am.”
“Will you visit?”
She nods. Then shrugs. “Maybe. Tell Lyss that I love her. Tell her I’m trying my best.”
“Okay.” My heart pounds and races, making it hard to breathe. But I stand tall and study the girl I once knew. “I’ll tell her.”
“I’m gonna sign. Tell her I’m doing what’s best.”
I draw in a shaky breath and nod. “Okay.”
“Love her enough for us both.” She gives a watery laugh. “But of course, you’re already so good at that. You’ve been doing it for years.”
“Be safe, Karla. Check in. Don’t make us worry.”
She swipes tears from her cheeks and nods. “I will. I promise. If my mom tries to come here…” She shakes her head. “Don’t worry about her. She won’t be able to mess with you anymore. She got what she wanted.”
“What?” I hate how my voice cracks. “What did she want?”
“Me.” Her breath comes out on an explosive huff. “She got me. And that’s all she ever wanted. Goodbye, Miles.”
I shoot a
look over my shoulder to Brooke, who watches us with a gentle crease between her brows. Then back to Karla. “Thank you for giving me my daughter. It’s the greatest gift anyone has ever given me.”
“It’s okay. I’ll sign the papers.”
“No, I don’t mean…” I draw in a cleansing breath. “I mean six years ago. Thank you for giving me that baby. She’s perfect, and she’s half you… that means something.”
“Nah.” She waves me off with a fake smile, but when a thump in the octagon announces the end of a fight, her eyes snap toward the sound in fear.
Slowly, she brings her gaze back to me. “I’m fairly certain she’s all you. She’s kind, sweet, smart, and funny… that’s all you, Miles. I’ve gotta go…” She backs up. “Good luck with your fight.”
And with that, she spins on her heel and bolts through the doors, losing herself in the crowd that spills outside.
I race to the doors, burst through them in search, but she disappears into the night. Gone. Just as surely as she was gone last time.
“Shit.” I run a hand over my face. Think. Think. Think. Then through my hair. “Shit.”
I turn and run straight to the stairs that lead to the office. Hope and grief wage a war in my heart. Happiness and longing. Freedom, the freedom I worked so hard for, reigns supreme as I sprint up the stairs, and pass fighters who scowl when I bump them.
I hit the top step with a smile, slam the office door open with a flourish, and smile at my girls. Three generations, as Brooke holds Lyss, and Kit stands over them both.
Kit looks me up and down in search of… whatever harmful thing she assumes Karla said or did. But when she comes up with nothing, she steps back with a smile.
“Miles?” Brooke comes around the desk that stands not far from the window. “Was…” She tries to nod at Lyss, to speak without words. “Is everything okay?”
I nod and push through the room. I make a beeline for her, for my daughter, for my family, and when we clash, I wrap them both in my arms and press a kiss to Brooke’s lips.
I thought winning the first tournament was what freedom tasted like.
I was wrong.
I thought winning the second time was surely it.
I was wrong again.
And I’ve been training the last few months like winning a third time would seal the deal.
I was wrong all along.
This is it. This, these people in my arms.
“I love you.” I press a kiss to Brooke’s chin. To her cheek. To her brow. And then I switch and kiss Lyss’s forehead until she giggles. “I love you both so much that it hurts a little bit.”
“That’s like cake, Daddy.” Lyss smiles when I look to her. “I love cake. But then it hurts in my tummy. Like that?”
“Yeah.” Laughing, I shake my head and stare into Brooke’s sky-blue eyes. “Marry me?”
“Oh…” Her eyes widen. “Wow. I thought I was gonna have to wait until Christmas day for you to ask that.”
“No, I’m asking now. Marry me, Brooklyn. Make a family with me. Then adopt my daughter and make it official.”
“Oh… Oh!” Her wide eyes fill with tears. “Really?”
I nod and accept Lyss when she dives from Brooke’s arms to mine. “Really. I want you to be one of us. The for real way.”
Brooke looks to Lyss, swipes a sleeve beneath her eye, and sniffles. “Lyss? Do you… wow…” She drags in a heavy breath that expands her chest. “Wow. Lyss, would that be okay?”
Heavy, head-banging nods confirm what I already knew.
“We want you, Brooke. Both of us. Marry us? I don’t have a ring for you.”
“It’s at home,” Lyss helpfully adds. “Under the tree, in the spotty paper.”
Brooke gives a watery laugh and steps in again to hug us. She lays her cheek on my chest, and puckers her lips for Lyss. “Yes.”
“Yes?” I ask. “Yes?”
She nods. “Yes. It’s my Christmas wish.”
The End
*
Are you ready for more?
It’s Uncle Bry’s turn to speak next in “No Limits.”
Acknowledgments
*Sigh* Iowa… you make me happy.
It’s crazy that I feel this sense of relief once I get to this part of a book. Iowa and Brooke are happy, Lyss is safe, and now we can all relax.
It’s the greatest payoff after typing every single word that led us here.
Thanks for coming along on this ride with me!
As always, I want to thank my very best friends – Tink and Kelly. I love you both very much. Thank you for being mine.
My betas – Debbie and Siddhi – thank you for your hard work. I appreciate every scrap of feedback you give.
My cover designer – Amy Q – I seriously adore your work! Thank you.
My editor – Jen from Bird’s Eye Books. Thank you for your hard work.
My proofreader - Lindsi - you always make these guys shine. Thank you.
My crew – I love you guys so much. Thank you for your unending and super passionate support.
Also by EMILIA FINN
(in reading order)
The Rollin On Series
Finding Home
Finding Victory
Finding Forever
Finding Peace
Finding Redemption
Finding Hope
The Survivor Series
Because of You
Surviving You
Without You
Rewriting You
Always You
Take A Chance On Me
The Checkmate Series
Pawns In The Bishop’s Game
Till The Sun Dies
Castling The Rook
Playing For Keeps
Rise Of The King
Sacrifice The Knight
Winner Takes All
Checkmate
Stacked Deck - Rollin On Next Gen
Wildcard
Reshuffle
Game of Hearts
Full House
No Limits
Bluff
Rollin On Novellas
(Do not read before finishing the Rollin On Series)
Begin Again – A Short Story
Written in the Stars – A Short Story
Full Circle – A Short Story
Worth Fighting For – A Bobby & Kit Novella
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