“I love you so much it hurts, Theo. I had to tell you. I just can’t keep it in anymore.” She hiccupped. “I’ve loved you since that day I choked on my Milk Duds. Do you remember that day?”
Theo smiled. “I’ll never forget it.”
“OK, so that day, when I woke up on the floor and you were kissing me…?” She frowned at him. “You remember that part?”
“Oh yes.”
“Well, I fell in love with you right then. And I love, love, love you now. And I’m going to kiss you, you big, gorgeous, studly-”
When Theo slammed his lips onto Lucy’s soft, sweet mouth, he couldn’t think of a good reason to ever stop kissing her. He couldn’t think at all. He couldn’t remember what it was that he wanted to tell her.
The kiss said everything, anyway. It told Theo that Lucy just broke through a dam in her heart and the love was pouring out of her and it was all for him and he was sucking it down because he wanted it. He was dying for it.
He was dying for Lucy.
He brought his arms around her and pulled her as close as he could. She tilted her head to the side for him, giving him leeway to kiss her like a crazy man, and he lifted her, tossed her up in the air for the second it took him to relocate his hands on her butt, where he held her aloft.
“I love you, Theo. Did you hear me? This is the part where you say, ‘I love you, too,’ and then tell me the night in Tampa was the most wonderful night of your life, and every night since has been perfect, and you want to sleep with me every night from now on!”
He put her down and set her aside long enough for him to remove his dinner jacket, because he was sweating and because he wanted to have something under them when he pulled her into that reclining position he’d envisioned a few minutes earlier. He took her hand and led her closer to the surf, where he spread out his coat.
He lay down on it and propped himself on his elbows.
“Come here, Lucy.”
“What are we doing?”
“Come here and I’ll show you.”
Lucy knelt at his side, then crawled over him, hiking her dress up enough that she could straddle him.
“You are incredible.” He stroked his hands over her knees, then her thighs.
“I just told you I love you, Theo. I’ve loved you for a long time.” She frowned at him, her hair slipping from its fancy little twist. “Did you hear what I just said?”
He was stalling for time and he knew it. He grabbed her head and kissed her hard and crushed her to the front of his body and waited until he felt her relax, simply surrender to the force they created together, what they’d always created together.
Their mouths fought and pushed and then soothed. Their tongues wrestled, then caressed. Theo’s hands were all over Lucy’s body, and she was a delight under his touch-female and hot and sexy-and he was losing his mind over this woman. Lucy Cunningham was a revelation to him, a woman he dared to picture as his companion and lover. Maybe even his wife someday. If only things were different.
“Answer me!” She pushed up and away.
Theo reached out and cupped her left breast. Paradise indeed. She swatted his hand away.
“Oh my God,” she said. Theo watched her face stiffen in horror. “You’re pulling out the banner!”
“What?” He continued to stare, mesmerized by her sparkly, perfect breasts.
Lucy scrambled to get up, and as she did so, Theo saw the first slash of lightning in the sky above them.
“Lightning, Lucy. We’d better go back inside.”
“There’s always lightning with us, you bastard!” And with that, she started to run. She could really make tracks these days, and he had a hard time catching her, given that she’d had a decent head start.
Theo grabbed their shoes, then put on his jacket as he ran behind her along the boardwalk and poolside. The rain started coming down in a hard sheet, and they were soaked by the time the doorman let them back in, no small amount of amusement on his face.
“Thanks,” Theo said, brushing sand from his jacket.
“Enjoy your evening,” the doorman said, smiling.
The ride back up in the elevator was an interminable hell. Lucy’s chest heaved, her hair and dress ruined, as a little puddle formed under, her bare feet. Theo held out her sandals. She snagged them without looking his way.
“My life isn’t what you want or need, Lucy. I can’t give you what you deserve.”
She swung her face around and her eyes were clear and bright, not a tear to be seen.
“You are worse than any of them.”
“Lucy-”
“I thought… Everyone thought… Even Doris thought…” Lucy shook her head and squared her shoulders. “Go to hell, Theo.”
“You mean more to me than I can say.” Theo knew that was lame, but it was accurate, and it was the best he could come up with in the circumstances.
Lucy laughed. “We’re done, Theo. I’m getting another trainer. I can’t spend time with you anymore.”
“Don’t, Luce.”
“It’s not fair to me.” Her lips were trembling and her jaw was set rigid. “You sleep with me. You tell me you want me. But you don’t love me. I just told you I loved you, for God’s sake, and you said… You said nothing‘”
Theo opened his mouth, but there was no air and nothing happened except a drop of rainwater fell from his brow onto his cheek.
“How sad is this?” Lucy slumped back against the elevator wall and let go with a bitter laugh. “The fat girl thinks she’s good enough for the golden boy, but she’s wrong again.”
Theo’s body went numb. “You are not a fat girl, Lucy. You’re a beautiful woman. And I’m not a golden boy-I’m just a guy. Whatever this is really about, whatever it is that you won’t tell me, just get over it.”
She nodded at him, her mouth rigid. “I’m going to get over it, Theo-don’t you doubt that for a second. But not with you.”
The elevator arrived at the ballroom level and the doors opened. Lucy stepped ahead of him, and as they passed a small reception table Theo reached for her arm.
“There’s a reason I can’t say what you want to hear, Lucy.”
She scanned the foyer, as if to search for something to throw at him. She grabbed an abandoned goblet of red wine and tossed the contents onto his James Bond dinner jacket.
He watched Lucy disappear with Gia and Mary Fran. Theo found Buddy sitting alone at the table where he’d left him.
“Come on, Bud. The night has officially been shot to hell, thanks to me.”
Buddy followed him out the double doors and to the bank of elevators. When one didn’t arrive immediately, Theo charged through the fire door and began racing down the stairwell.
“Why are we taking the stairs?”
“Think of it as part of your training.”
“That would be going up, not down.”
“Just come on, Bud.”
“What happened to you and Lucy? She looked very sad.”
“We got caught in the rain.”
“Are we running away?”
“Not really.”
“That Stephan guy is a bad man. He hates Lucy. Lola is a mean lady, too. She called me a ‘tardo’ like I didn’t know what it meant.”
“What?” Theo looked behind him to see Buddy struggling to keep up. He stopped. “Are you all right?”
“I’m OK, but Stephan kind of scared me. He asked me questions about you and Lucy-like how often you kissed her and our address and if Lucy ever came over to our house. Where are we going?”
“Back upstairs.”
Theo took the stairs two at a time and slammed open the fire door, checking quickly to make sure Buddy was right behind him. “Stay out here just a moment.”
He knew he must look like a crazy man, wet and disheveled and angry as hell, but he didn’t care. He found Lola and Stephan canoodling at a table in the corner, Lola practically in his lap.
“Is there something I can help you with, Stephan? My
brother mentioned you all had a nice little chat.”
Stephan jumped up from his chair so fast that Lola got knocked sideways. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”
Lola hit Stephan in the arm. “Sure you do! The retarded kid!”
Stephan closed his eyes and shook his head slowly. Lola put a hand over her mouth a second too late, and Theo realized he had never seen Lola drunk before. It was scary.
“We had a friendly exchange is all.”
Theo got up close in Stephan’s face. “What are you up to, Sherrod? What do you have against Lucy? She’s working her ass off for you-I just don’t get it.”
Stephan laughed in his face. “I have nothing against her. She’s doing a fine job.”
Theo frowned. “Then why try to embarrass her like you did tonight? Why give her such a hard time at the office?”
“Is there a point to this conversation? If so, I don’t see it.”
Theo put his nose right up to Stephan’s. “Here’s my point, dickhead-if you do anything to harm Lucy or ever speak to my brother again, I will unleash my inner psycho killer on your ass. Do you see the point now?”
Lola gasped and Stephan stepped back, trying to hide his shaking hands. He forced a laugh. “I must say I’ve enjoyed your heroic charge in here, defending Lucy’s honor and all, but do you realize that girl thinks you care for her? Do you know she thinks you love her?”
Lola laughed.
He did love Lucy. That was the hell of it. And as Theo raced through the ballroom, he knew he’d hurt her in his effort to spare her. How could he have done that to her? How would she ever trust him again?
Theo squealed out of the parking garage and drove in silence the fifteen minutes to Miami Beach. He double-parked in front of the Palm Club, keyed in the security code, and ran with Buddy back to the trainer lounge.
“Here. Hold this.” He handed Buddy the club’s digital camera, then clicked the power button.
“What are we doing, Theo?” Buddy looked like he was ready to cry, so Theo stopped racing around and looked him in the eye.
“This is for Lucy, Bud. She’s the most wonderful woman I’ve ever known, and I just hurt her really bad. I don’t know how I’m ever going to make it up to her, but I know that right now I’ve got to do this one thing and I need your help. Will you help me?”
Buddy nodded. “I guess. But why are we doing this?”
Theo rubbed his knuckles on Buddy’s hair. “I have a feeling that someday I’m going to need to prove what I learned tonight-do you understand?”
Buddy pouted. “No.”
“OK. Here’s the deal. I know Lucy, right?”
Buddy nodded.
“And one day, when we’re done with our project and I figure out a way to make my life work with her in it, she’s going to ask me for proof that I came to my senses before she lost all the weight. It will be important to her.”
Buddy nodded slowly. “You’re going to finally tell her you love her?”
Theo stopped what he was doing and stared at Buddy. “Just give me a couple minutes and then take my picture.”
Theo dug through the supply closet, Buddy staring at him like he’d lost his mind, which, in a way, Theo supposed was a correct diagnosis. Then he riffled through the desk drawer until he found a wide-tipped Magic Marker.
“What are you doing!” Buddy asked impatiently.
Theo held up the sign to inspect his handiwork. It was truly the work of a man on the brink, but so be it. It got the point across.
“Nice job,” Buddy said, giggling. “Do you want to smile for this?”
“Sure. Why not?” Theo smiled and Buddy snapped the picture. Then they both went to the computer, downloaded the image, and printed it out on photo paper.
It was a color shot of Theo, standing in a sandy white dinner jacket splashed with red wine, holding a sign that read simply: I LOVE LUCY.
Tyson was a natural at this. He worked the camera like a seasoned politician, spinning the truth with such panache and charm that the hosts of WakeUp Miami, along with the entire studio audience, were hoodwinked.
“Theo sends his regards, but he’s feeling so under the weather that he thought it was best not to expose anyone to what he’s got.”
Yeah, Lucy said to herself. He’s got shit for brains; that’s what he’s got.
Lucy kept her eyes on her shoes. She was able to remain like that, lifeless and out of focus, for several long minutes while Tyson regaled everyone with tales from his college football days and his aspirations to be a TV sports announcer.
Lucy didn’t mind one bit that he was using this appearance as one giant job interview. It was fine with her. Anything was fine with her.
Then it was time for the weigh-in, and it surprised her just how little it bothered her that Tyson was doing the weighing.
“Great job, Lucy!” Tyson said. “Another eight pounds and one and three-quarter inches!”
The audience began whooping and hooting and chanting, “Go, Lucy! Go, Lucy!”
And all she wanted to do was go home, put on her pink sweatpants, and eat.
Chapter 9
August
Journal Entry Aug 4
Breakfast: 2-egg-white omelet with 1/4 c low-fat ched-dar, 1/2 c onion, pepper, and tomato; one slice whole wheat toast; 1 tbsp no-sugar-added apple butter; decaf with splash of skim milk
Lunch: 3 oz broiled salmon; 1 c steamed broccoli; 1 c salad with 1 tbsp oil and vinegar; 1/2 c brown rice
Dinner: A Wendy’s Triple with everything; a large fry; a large Frosty
Evening snack: 1 qt butter brickie ice cream; 1 box of ginger snaps
Affirmation for Today:
I seem to be drawing a blank.
Lucy woke up the next morning, looked in the mirror, and said out loud, “Get your shit together, quick.”
She refused to even attempt to wear anything without elastic embedded somewhere in the waist and found a pair of khaki crop pants that would do fine for the day. She had no pressing appointments.
Then she shoved her feet into a pair of slides and yanked a white cotton twinset out of her closet. She tied a paisley silk scarf around her neck for color, ran a brush through her hair, and smeared some coral pink gloss over her lips. That would have to do. It was all she could handle that morning.
There would be no breakfast. The idea of food made her wish she were dead. In the hours between 6:00 p.m. and 10:00 p.m. of the previous day, she’d violated every promise she’d made to herself and to Theo. She’d even violated the only sensible rule of dieting she’d ever run across, the sage advice of the Muppets’ Miss Piggy, who recommended never eating anything bigger than your head.
Lucy was fairly certain that if piled together, all that junk she binged on the day before would be bigger than anyone’s head. Perhaps even Theo’s.
And who cared what promise she’d made to Theo, anyway? He was out of the picture. This was all her problem now, and she’d just have to deal with it alone.
Lucy drove to work, and though she didn’t intend to eat for the rest of her life, food called out to her all the way to the office. Doughnuts whispered her name from their evil glass display cases. Croissants and muffins beckoned to her from bakery windows like prostitutes in the doorways of French Quarter brothels. Fast-food drive-throughs shouted obscene lies about the relief to be found in a bacon, egg, and cheese biscuit-or two.
Lucy told herself she would make it through this day. She would get around to calling Tyson about scheduling workout sessions. She would stick to a sane and healthy food plan.
She would not allow Theo’s rejection to stand in the way of her dreams. She could do it without him. She’d show him.
Stephan traced his fingers down the ridges of Lola’s abdominals, agog at the carved perfection of the woman now stretched out on his bed. He had to admit that she wasn’t the most passionate female he’d ever been with, in fact she was rather lifeless, but, with all the lights on, it was fun in a visual kind of w
ay.
“You’re pretty out of shape, Stephan,” Lola said.
He flinched and sucked in his gut.
“You should schedule some sessions with me out of bed,” she continued, propping herself on her side as she smiled at him. “We’ll focus on trimming body fat and adding definition. In the meantime, you should cut down on your refined carbs and try some of the protein powder I was telling you about.”
What the hell was this? He hadn’t asked her for her advice!
“I hate to say this, but the nutrition plan Theo and Lucy are using seems to work. Have you checked out their Web site? Hundreds of people are now following their program. It’s, like, amazing.”
Stephan felt his blood pressure build.
“Stephan?” Lola sat up cross-legged, and he was fascinated at how the only things that seemed to roll or crinkle on her body were three tiny creases of darkly tanned skin around her waist. No fat. Anywhere. He wondered if that might be unnatural.
He rolled over onto his back and stared at the ceiling for a few moments, then put a hand over his eyes. When had it gotten so complicated? All he’d wanted was to reward himself for working so hard all these years, have a little fun. So he’d been siphoning some profits to a bank in the Caymans. So what? A lot of businesspeople did it. But now he’d gone and pissed off Murray Goldstein, who was threatening to sic the feds on him.
It was all Lucy’s fault. She’d gone out there and worked her ass off-literally-and now his ass was in real danger of being sent to prison or ending up in a watery grave at the bottom of Biscayne Bay. He didn’t know which was worse.
At this point, it wasn’t even about stopping her from losing weight anymore. The damage had been done. Now Stephan just wanted to make her pay.
“Here.” Stephan hoisted himself up off the bed and leaned over toward the nightstand drawer. “I have a little something for you, Lola. Just to let you know how special you are to me.”
He watched with satisfaction as Lola opened the jewelry box and gasped at the platinum toe ring.
He Loves Lucy Page 18