Envious

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Envious Page 18

by Cheryl Douglas


  “What?”

  “The world doesn’t promise us tomorrow. That’s why we have to live every day as though it were our last.”

  She opened one eye to look at Lee. He rarely talked about his parents and how their plane crash had changed his life. “I guess you’re right.”

  “I know I am, Kat. Don’t waste time feeling sorry for yourself. If you think Chris might be the guy to make you happy, figure out a way to make it work. Before it’s too late.”

  Chapter Eighteen

  Chris had been in Arizona for two weeks. He was due to return to Nashville for the first time the following day. He was enjoying a little quality time with his daughter before he had to return her to her mother and stepfather.

  “Do you like living here, daddy?” she asked, staring at Franklin and Bear flashing across the flat screen TV.

  He looked around his non-descript penthouse. It had come fully furnished, and since it was close to Bianca’s house and new pre-school, it seemed like a good fit. “Sure, it’s okay.” He hated it. He missed his busy office building and the rush of putting out fires on a daily basis. He missed his old Victorian and the beautiful woman who lived across the street. “How about you, princess? Do you like it?”

  She nodded vigorously. “I love my new room, and mommy said I can get a puppy soon.”

  “That is exciting, isn’t it?” Chris smiled. In spite of his misery, he was happy to see his daughter settling in so nicely.

  “My new teacher, Miss Bethany, is really nice, don’t you think?”

  “I do.” Bianca’s pretty young teacher had made no secret of the fact she was available and finding it difficult to find suitable dates. There was a time when he wouldn’t have hesitated to ask her out. After Katie, anyone else seemed like a poor substitute.

  “Do you like her?”

  “Sure.” Chris had a bad feeling he knew where the conversation was going.

  “I think she likes you too.”

  “Is that so?” He would have been blind not to notice the teacher’s not-so-subtle clues. Apparently even his daughter had picked up on them.

  “But you still miss Katie.”

  He had never told his daughter he and Katie were a couple. He thought it would be difficult for her to understand because she’d always thought of Katie as Uncle Lee’s wife. “Sure. You probably miss Hannah too, don’t you?”

  “Yeah.” She hugged her pink stuffed princess bear tighter as she twirled her hair.

  “Maybe you can come back to visit with me next time,” Chris said. “I know your grandparents would love to see you too.”

  “Maybe you should stay there, Daddy.”

  Chris’s gut clenched. He’d tried to hide his unhappiness from Bianca, but he obviously hadn’t done a good job. “Why do you say that? Don’t you want me here with you?”

  “Not if you’re gonna be sad.”

  “I’m not sad, baby.”

  “Are too.” She turned her big blue eyes on him. “I can tell.”

  “It’ll just take a little getting used to.” He ruffled her silky hair as he faced her. “Nashville’s been my home forever. All my family and friends are there, my business—”

  “That’s where you oughta be.”

  Chris never ceased to be amazed by his daughter’s intuitiveness. Courtney claimed Bianca was an old soul trapped in a little body, and at moments like that, he couldn’t disagree. “I should be right here with you.”

  She looked at him a long time. “We yussa be ‘agether on weekends, right?”

  “Yeah,” he said warily, trying to figure out where she was going. “Are you suggesting I fly back here on weekends?”

  “Why not?”

  Why not, indeed? It’s not like the thought hadn’t crossed Chris’s mind a few dozen times. “Yeah, but—”

  “But what?”

  “I hate the thought of living so far away from you, honey.”

  She climbed into his lap and laid her head on his shoulder. “It’ll be okay, Daddy.”

  He couldn’t speak past the lump in his throat. His little girl was his whole world. Could he really leave her behind?

  ***

  Katie was tweaking her resume. She tried not to feel disillusioned, but it wasn’t easy after thirteen resumes, four interviews, and not a single job offer. Part of the problem was her lack of work experience, but she vowed to make up for it with her enthusiasm. She loved children and was passionate about being a positive influence in their lives. If only she could find someone to believe in her.

  The doorbell rang, and she set her laptop on the coffee table. Hannah was spending the weekend with her daddy, and Katie wasn’t expecting company. It must be a salesman. She thought about ignoring it until they rang the bell a second time. She pulled the door open with a scowl, and then her heart battered her chest. “Chris, what are you doing here?”

  With a half-smile, he said, “What kind of greeting is that?” When she didn’t respond, his face fell. “Probably exactly what I deserve, huh?”

  “I’m sorry.” She stepped back and opened the door wider. “I was just surprised to see you. Come on in.” Not a day, barely an hour, had passed that she hadn’t thought of him. But she was determined to move on with her life. She didn’t want Hannah to think a woman needed a man in her life to be happy or feel complete.

  “Thanks.” He shoved his hands into the pockets of his jacket and wandered into the family room.

  “Can I get you something?” she asked, following a safe distance behind him.

  “No, thanks.” His eyes landed on the computer screen. “How’s the job hunt going?”

  “Not well, I’m afraid.” It hurt her pride to admit it.

  “I’m sorry to hear that.” He faced her. “But maybe it’s for the best. Maybe there’s something even better out there waiting for you.”

  If only she could believe that. Lately, her life was just a series of disappointments. “I guess only time will tell, right? In the meantime, I’m trying to keep my chin up.” She needed to put on a brave face so he wouldn’t feel guilty about walking away from their business. She knew if there had been another way, he would have stayed and helped her with the pre-school.

  “I’m not surprised. You’re just about the strongest woman I know.”

  Her? Strong? She felt as if a strong wind might sweep her legs from under her. She couldn’t be sure if that was because of his presence, feeling so beaten up by his departure, her difficulty finding a job, or her pending divorce. “That’s sweet of you to say. Are you here for work?”

  “Among other things.” He sat on one of the club chairs. Instead of leaning back and putting his feet up on the ottoman, he leaned forward, looking as uncomfortable and uncertain as she felt. “Can I ask you something?”

  “Sure.”

  “Have you been as miserable as I’ve been since I left?”

  Katie had no idea how to answer that. She didn’t want to make him feel guilty, but she couldn’t lie to him either. She had been miserable without him. “I guess you could say that.”

  “Come here.” He held out his hand. She didn’t hesitate to take it. He pushed the footstool away from his chair and pulled her down so she was sitting on it, facing him. Holding both of her hands, he took a moment to collect his thoughts. “I’ve done a lot stupid things in my life, but leaving you tops the list.”

  She couldn’t breathe, much less speak. Was he coming back? If he was, could she trust him to stay? “Things aren’t working out the way you’d hoped in Arizona?”

  “I hate it there.”

  Seeing him looking so down pained Katie. She loved him. She wanted him to be happy, even if it couldn’t be with her. She squeezed his hands. “I’m really sorry to hear that. I know how much you wanted it to work.” Chris was usually the one to lift her spirits, not the other way around. If she could offer a few words of encouragement to make him feel better, she owed it to him to try.

  He chuckled. “Sometimes I think that kid’s already s
marter than her old man.”

  “Why’s that?”

  “She made me realize that it didn’t matter whether I lived just down the street or thousands of miles away. As long as she knows how much I love her, we’ll be okay. She’s not gonna stop loving me just ‘cause she doesn’t see me every day. Hell, even when she was in Nashville, we only saw each other two days a week. Our relationship was stronger because I made more of an effort to make sure she had fun when we were together.”

  “Does that mean you’re thinking about moving back?” Katie wasn’t about to get her hopes up.

  “I’ve tried it Courtney’s way, and it’s killing me. Even Bianca saw that. I know that’s not what my little girl wants for me, and that’s not what I want for myself.”

  “So you are coming home?”

  “That depends.”

  “On what?”

  “On whether you’ll take me back?”

  ***

  Chris was silently begging for Katie to throw him a lifeline. Trust had always been an issue for her, and he’d let her down once. He had no idea whether she’d be willing to take a chance on him again, but he couldn’t move on with his life until he tried to make things right with her. Coming back to Nashville would ease some of his pain, but the only thing that would truly soothe the ache of missing his daughter was building a life with Katie.

  He tipped her chin up with his index finger when she looked down. “I’m not asking you to promise me forever. At least not yet. I know it’s gonna take a while for you to trust me again, and I’m willing to wait as long as I know there’s still a chance for us.”

  “How do I know you won’t decide six months from now you can’t stand being away from Bianca? You could pick up and leave again.” She was clearly fighting back tears. “It was hard enough the first time. If we’d invested more time… I just don’t know if I can take that kind of risk.”

  He understood, but that didn’t mean he intended to give up without a fight. “Is Hannah asleep?”

  “No, she’s with Lee. Why?”

  Standing, he reached for her hand. “Come with me.”

  “Where are we going?”

  “You’ll see.” He linked his hand with hers as he led her to the door.

  She slipped her feet into a pair of flip-flops before she looked down at her sweats. “Uh, maybe I should change first.”

  “No need.” He kissed the tip of her nose. “You look perfect for what I have in mind.”

  She rolled her eyes. “You’re not taking me jogging, are you? You know I hate sweating.”

  He laughed, pulled her through the door, and handed her the purse hanging on the coat rack by the door. “You weren’t saying that the last time we worked up a sweat together.”

  She blushed furiously, muttering, “Shut up,” as she fit her key into the lock.

  Before she could side-step him, Chris wrapped his arms around her, burying his face in her neck. “I’ve been dying to do this ever since I walked through the door.” He was risking rejection, but he couldn’t help himself. He needed to know if she would still respond to him the way she had the last time they’d been together.

  Katie’s head rolled back, resting on his shoulder as she linked hands with him. “That feels amazing.”

  He was relieved she wasn’t trying to hide her reaction, but that didn’t mean he was home free. The only way he could make her realize he was in it for the long haul was to paint her a picture of the life they could have together. “Come on, gorgeous.” He kissed her cheek. “We’ve got somewhere to be.”

  The short drive was quiet as darkness descended. The soft country music added a backdrop that matched his mood: one minute he was hopeful, the next dejected. Katie held his hand, but he felt the tension. Her silence spoke volumes. He tried to engage her in small talk a time or two, but her mind was obviously wandering. Not that he could blame her. An hour ago, she’d believed he was gone for good, and then he was back and asking her for another chance. When they pulled up in front of the building he’d bought, he cut the engine.

  She asked, “Why are we here?”

  “Let’s go inside, and I’ll explain.” Chris had been thinking of little else since he decided to come home. He couldn’t wait to share his ideas with Katie.

  Katie followed him to the door and waited as he fit a key into the lock and turned the knob. The building was flooded in light as soon as he flipped the switch. Katie looked from room to room in awe. “I forgot how perfect it is.”

  “It can be perfect, Katie. All you have to do is say the word and we’re back in business.” He held his breath as she poked her head into the room that would be the main office for the administrator and receptionist. “Can you picture it? The brightly colored rugs and plastic bins? Can you smell the chalk and magic markers? I picture a few big round tables right there.” He pointed to the center of a big open room that would serve as one of their classrooms. “And that spot would be perfect for an art station, don’t you think?”

  Shaking her head, she said, “Chris, don’t.”

  He knew she was afraid to get her hopes up, but he wanted nothing more than to convince her to believe in the dream they’d been building. The place could be the catalyst for Katie becoming everything she’d ever dreamed, and he wanted more than anything to be a part of that. “It’s going to be a couple of solid months of hard work to get this place up and running by fall. I’m up for it, if you are?”

  She looked hesitant but hopeful. “But you have your business. It’s not like you could—”

  “I was going to work from Arizona. I could just as easily set up an office right here. That way, I’d be here to help you as much as you needed me.”

  Turning into his arms, she looped her arms around his neck. Tears filled her eyes. “I do need you. I was afraid to admit it, even to myself, but I do need you.”

  “I need you too, baby.” He pulled her into his arms. “There’s no shame in admitting that. It’s okay to need someone.”

  “I was so afraid I’d lost you,” she said softly, holding him tighter. “I kept telling myself I’d get over it, but nothing had ever hurt like that. Every night, I’d fall asleep staring at the phone, fighting with myself over whether I should call and tell you how much I missed you.”

  “I wish you had. I may have come to my senses sooner.”

  Gripping his shoulders, she pulled back to look him in the eye. “Being a good dad means everything to you. Are you sure about this? Are you sure coming back to Nashville is the right thing to do?”

  “It’s the only thing to do. I can’t deny it’ll break my heart every time I have to say good-bye to Bianca, but that’ll be nothing new. Being a part-time dad sucks, but I got used to it. I’ll get used to this too.”

  “If there’s anything I can do to help”—she brushed her lips over his—“just let me know.”

  “You could leave your door unlocked after Hannah goes to bed.”

  Katie laughed. “It’s a deal.”

  “Speaking of deals, how about it? Are we partners?”

  She turned around, pressing her back to his front as she settled into his arms. “You really think we can do this?”

  “I believe in you. Maybe more than you believe in yourself. I know you can do anything you set your mind to.”

  She smiled. “Where have you been all my life?”

  “Biding my time and waiting for you to figure out we belong together.”

  She closed her eyes with a sigh of satisfaction. “It may have taken me a while, but I’ve finally figured that out.”

  About the Author

  To learn more about this author, visit www.cheryldouglasbooks.com

  To comment on this book, or ask the author a question you can email her at:

  [email protected]

  You can also visit Cheryl on Facebook at www.facebook.com/cheryldouglasbooks

  Twitter: CherylDouglasNN

  Please consider leaving a review for this book or other books in the
series.

  Thank You

  Other Books by Cheryl Douglas

  Now Available

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  Shameless

  Fearless

  Ruthless

  Reckless

  Relentless

  Heartless

  Hopeless

  Careless

  Nashville Nights Next Generation

  High Stakes

  Trade Off

  Holiday Homecoming

  Game On

  Burn Out

  Fast Track

  Time Out

  Face Value

  Blown Away

  Breathless

  Imagine

  Starting Over (Single Title)

  Coming October 2013

  Strike Out (Book One in the Texas Titans Series)

  When professional baseball player, Zach Foster, agreed to go into business with five of his best friends, he didn’t expect their little sports bar to evolve into a national chain, spanning fifty states, but it did. The business helps to fill the void in Zach’s life during the off-season, but when he closes his eyes at night, he still can’t forget the girl who left that gaping hole in his heart when she left him standing at the altar ten years ago.

  Lauren ‘Rennie’ Alexander would do anything to fulfill a sick child’s wish. Not only is it her job, as director of the Sky’s the Limit Foundation, but it’s her passion. So when her assistant brings her a letter scribbled in crayon, complete with an application from the little boy’s loving parents, she is ready to make another dream come true. Until she realizes that sick boy’s dream is her worst nightmare. He wants to meet his hero, baseball player, Zach Foster. The same lying, deceitful jerk who broke Rennie’s heart. It’s seems she has no choice but to take one for the team.

  Book Three in the Music City Moguls series, Forbidden, will be available early 2014.

 

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