My Heart be Damned

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My Heart be Damned Page 4

by Gray, Chanelle


  Something moved in the corner of my eye, and I startled out of my thoughts, nearly slipping from the branch. I squinted through the darkness at a large man shoveling dirt from a huge hole he was digging in front of an old gravestone.

  I was torn.

  Instinct and duty demanded I go down and stop whatever he was doing. The man was clearly Damned, and I should send his soul back to Hell.

  Stubbornness and grief told me to stay put. It was none of my business anymore. Other Hunters could deal with this.

  My fingers twitched. Digging up bones never meant anything good. I buried my head in my arms and bit down on my knee. My leg shook, and just when I thought I couldn’t possibly contain my urge to intervene another second, a commotion erupted below me.

  My lovely, old caretaker had brought two community support officers along, in bright yellow coats. Probably in case I showed up again. I almost laughed when I imagined the shock the caretaker must have felt to find a creepy man digging a grave, instead of a teenage girl breaking into a crypt. After some back and forth shouting, the gravedigger grabbed a tattered bag and took off towards the fence, which he jumped easily.

  I waited five minutes for the caretaker and officers to walk away before dropping to the ground in a crouch. My whole body was wired, still hyped up for a fight that never happened. Instead of hunting down the grave robber, I slipped my earphones in and burned the energy running home. I wasn’t a Hunter anymore.

  Chapter Five

  Wrong Impressions

  “Sweetie, wake up.”

  My mother loomed over me; her green eyes a stark contrast to the dark room. I stretched and blinked, until my eyes didn’t want to remain closed anymore.

  “I need to show you something,” she said.

  She helped me dress into warm clothes and told me to keep quiet as we snuck out of the house into the deep, dark, night. She strapped me in our car, kissing my forehead, my nose, and my cheeks. She didn’t stop driving until we got to a graveyard. I’d never been to a graveyard before.

  My eyes widened as Mum helped me from the car.

  “Mummy? Why are we here?” I asked, yawning loudly.

  She slapped a hand over my mouth. “We have to be quiet, baby. I have to show you something. I have to show you what you were born to do.”

  There was a gap in the fence, and we climbed through it easily. I watched my mother as we crept through the eerie graveyard. I thought that she was so much more graceful than I was. Her shoulders were tense, and her feet made no noise as we walked. Finally, we stopped.

  “Do you remember the story I would tell you at night?” Her voice was frantic and low. Her eyes darted from side to side.

  “About the Hunters who send bad guys back to Hell?” I asked.

  She nodded. “Yes, baby. I want to show you tonight that the story I would tell you is true. I’m a Hunter, and when you turn sixteen, and are mature enough, you will be too. We send the bad people away.”

  “Really?” That was cool. I’d always imagined being the girl in the story. Saving the world.

  “Yes.” She slowly drew a long knife from her trouser waistband. “Don’t be scared. This is a special weapon. It’s been blessed by a priest. It’s what Hunter’s need to send the bad people away. A Blessed weapon only hurts the Damned soul, but not the host’s body unless they are not possessed. Okay?”

  But, I was scared. The knife glinted dangerously in the moonlight. Knives were bad, weren’t they?

  “I want you to hide behind this tombstone and watch me, okay? Don’t come out until I tell you to. That’s extremely important. You do not come out until I tell you.”

  I nodded, shaking from the cold and fear. “Okay, mummy.”

  She hid me behind the tombstone and disappeared into a crypt a little way away from where I hid. Suddenly she reappeared, but she wasn’t alone. A man was with her, his hands tied in front of him. Mum pushed him forward so that he stumbled and fell to his knees.

  “Get up,” she demanded.

  “Screw you,” he said.

  She reached down and cut the rope from his wrists with her knife. As soon as she did, he lunged for her, his fist pulled back. She sidestepped the attack, reached out, and then shoved him away. He tripped but didn’t fall, coming back at her. I watched as they fought - my eyes wide. He never got to touch her. She blocked, kicked, and jabbed. She moved so quickly, so gracefully that part of me was excited by it. She was just like the girl in the story!

  Finally, she hit him so hard that he fell back, and quick as a whip, she was on him, plunging the knife deep into his heart.

  I screamed, jumping up just as a puff of black smoke rose out of the man and evaporated into the air.

  “Mummy, you killed him!” I yelled.

  Slowly, she slipped the knife back in her waistband and made her way towards me. “No, Amerie, I saved him. The evil is gone, and the man will wake up soon and have his body back. You remember what the story says.”

  I did. The girl has to send the bad man back to Hell. Was that how it was done?

  “Do you see what I can do? We’re special, Amerie. We were created by a force called The Sisterhood, who is so powerful that they don’t even live in this universe. We are rare, but there are other people like us, other women. Stronger than ten men. Whatever the Damned can do, we can do too. And today, today begins your training so that when you are sixteen, you will become the Hunter I know you can be.”

  I stared up at her, confused, afraid, and excited. I was special. I would help save the world from monsters. I would be better than the girls at school who pulled my hair.

  “But Amerie,” Mum said, taking my hand, and leading me towards the car. “You can tell no one. This is our little secret.”

  I bolted upright in my uncomfortable bed, the sheets sweaty beneath me. I’d been dreaming more and more about Mum and my training with her these last few months, as though my subconscious was trying to tell me not to give up. Well, my subconscious could go screw itself. There was no way I was going to Hunt. Not after what it did to my mother.

  When I woke up again, later the next morning, it was as if I lived in an igloo. I pulled the duvet off the bed and wrapped it around my shoulders as I went in search of my dad. Why the hell was it so cold in here?

  He was still sleeping, of course. I banged on his door with my fist.

  “Dad!” I shouted. “Wake up! It’s like Antarctica in here.”

  He groaned, and I pushed open his bedroom door, which stuck slightly before I shouldered it the rest of the way.

  “What?” he asked groggily.

  “It’s cold in here. I can see my breath. Did you forget to pay the gas company again?”

  There was a long silence while Dad processed this. Then he cursed. “I can’t believe I forgot again. I’m sorry, Amerie. I’ll go pay it today.”

  “What about work?” I demanded.

  “I’m not going in today. I don’t feel well.”

  “Probably because you stayed out until four in the morning drinking.” I sighed. “Dad, I’m sick of this. I’m sick of acting like the parent. You’re the parent. Not me. So start being one.”

  “I’m trying, but it’s hard for me,” he snapped, sitting upright. Through the dark, I could just about make out his fluffy hair.

  “It’s hard for all of us,” I said. “But I still manage to get up each day and go to school. I even have a job now. A job I won’t ditch out on in favor of finding the bottom of a bottle.”

  “Watch your mouth. I’m still your father.”

  “Whatever. I’ll believe that when I see it.” And with that, I backed out of the room and slammed the door. The frame shook, and flecks of paint drifted down to the worn out carpet.

  “You’re always on his case.”

  I turned to look down the hall. Daniel was leaning out of his room, glaring at me. He wasn’t much younger – two years – but it was as if we had eons between us.

  “Someone has to be the adult. Can’t you feel
how cold it is? This means no hot water too, Dan. You can’t take those long showers you usually love if we have no gas.”

  “I know what it means,” he snapped, running a hand over his shaved head. “Don’t get pissy at me.”

  “I’m just saying…” I said. My voice was softer this time. “Hey, wanna catch the Tube together this morning? Would be nice to travel to school together again.”

  “Nah, I’m okay. I’m meeting friends.”

  “Oh.”

  “Well, see you around if you don’t dramatically get frost bite and die.”

  I playfully stuck my middle finger up at him and slipped back into my room. How was I supposed to get ready without any hot water? Reaching under my bed, I grabbed the old photo album – a knee jerk reaction to whenever something bad went down in my house - and began flicking through the pages. This kind of thing never happened then, and Daniel and I were much closer. You’d never know we went to the same school now. For a few minutes as I stared at photos of happy faces, I pretended I was in my old bed in a well-heated room.

  “Are we friends again, yet?” I asked, tapping Mercy on the shoulder.

  She closed her locker and turned to face me. “Sorry about freaking out last night.”

  I smiled, knowing that he'd forgiven me. “All is cool in the world. You done?”

  Mercy nodded. “Yep. I’m ready to get my soul crushed.”

  “It’s only geography, Mercy.” I slipped an arm around her shoulder. “Oh, and I have so much to tell you.”

  I immediately launched into an animated and slightly untrue story of what had happened once she’d left last night. She made the appropriate gasps and facial expressions of disbelief in all the right places, and by the time I’d finished telling my story, we were outside our classroom.

  “Have you seen Chuck today?” I asked, loitering by the door.

  Mercy shook her head. “No, but to be honest, I wasn’t really looking for him. Kinda avoiding him, if you get what I mean. You haven’t said anything to him, have you?”

  “No! I mean, I didn’t even get a chance to talk to him. He’s kinda pissed at me too. Thinks I made him seem like less of a man because I stuck up for him.”

  A teacher herded us into the classroom. I took my seat, and Mercy sat next to me.

  “I didn’t, though, did I?”

  Mercy shrugged. “I’m still stuck at you being blackmailed into working at The Hut! Do I get free stuff now?”

  I rolled my eyes at her. “I don’t know about the free stuff, but in a way, it’s a good thing. I can help out my dad, and the money I made selling my stereo is rapidly decreasing.”

  “But I get free stuff right?” She stuck out her tongue playfully, and I shoved her.

  The door to the classroom opened and Sam strolled in, swarmed by Sarah and her little crew. There was a sinking feeling in my stomach. I couldn’t explain why seeing him with them made me feel so...betrayed. Was it my fault because I shot him down?

  Mercy nudged me and gestured towards them in disbelief. As a group, they strolled past my table and to the back of the classroom where I heard Sarah ask someone to move up a desk, so Sam could have it. Her squeaky, butter-wouldn’t-melt in-her-mouth voice was too irritating to hear so early in the morning.

  “I can’t believe he’s succumbed so easily,” Mercy hissed.

  “Oh well,” I said, trying to hide my disappointment.

  Mercy stared at me for a few seconds, her eyebrow raised. “You did something.”

  “I did not!”

  “You did! I know you did. Why else would he be hanging with them instead of trying to get you to go out with him?” She suddenly gasped. “You shot him down! I bet you used the friends line, didn’t you?”

  Damn, this girl knew me too well. “No...”

  Mercy shook her head, leaning back in her seat. “I give up on you, Amerie Sara Carter.”

  “Was using my whole name really necessary?”

  “Yes! What was wrong with Sam? Come on, I’m intrigued to know what the problem was this time.”

  “There was nothing wrong with him...”

  “Stop lying.”

  I looked over to the teacher, silently begging him to start the class already, but he was rummaging around in his briefcase, his face indicating that he’d forgotten something important. Of all days...

  “There’s nothing wrong with Sam,” I said again. “He’s...nice.”

  Mercy groaned. “You mean he was too nice, don’t you?”

  “I’m not used to people being so nice to me. It was kinda creepy.”

  “I’m gonna offer you some advice,” Mercy said, leaning in closer to me. “When a boy is a gentleman to you and is actually nice, Amerie, you don’t shoot him down. You don’t call them creepy and chase them away! God, I don’t know what to do with you.”

  “Stop trying?” I offered hopefully.

  “Not a chance.”

  I groaned in frustration. “Okay, whatever. Our main focus right now should be Chuck. Not my new job. Not my inability to get a date. Thank you and good day.”

  Mercy shook her head at me, bemused. “I hate it when you say that. Thank you and good day. I mean, what does it even mean? Are you being sarcastic? Are you really saying it like you mean it?”

  “I think you should be the journalist around here,” I answered. “You ask too many questions.”

  Our teacher, Mr. Woodsen, finally seemed to find what he had been looking for. He silenced the class and began the lesson on the banana trade in St. Lucia. As he droned on, I turned my head slightly to peek at Sam. He had all three witches circled around him, trapping him in their evil cage, but he didn’t look as though it was too much of a chore.

  Had I been wrong about him? Nice people didn’t hang out with people like Sarah White. My people reading skills were obviously way off. I didn’t realize Mercy had feelings for Chuck. I also didn’t realize that the blonde girl at The Hut yesterday was bad news, and preyed on guys for a bit of fun on her boyfriend’s part. Last but not least, there was the guy with the pool cue. The guy whose blue eyes I couldn’t stop thinking about on my journey home last night.

  Maybe I got it all wrong. Maybe I didn’t know my friends as well as I’d always thought. Maybe the guy from last night was a perfectly normal sexy guy, and I was being paranoid.

  I was a psychologist’s dream that was for sure.

  After school, I changed for my first day of work at the Hut. I slipped into a pair of skinny jeans, a vest top, and a blazer but kept my school shoes.

  Maxwell Academy was situated in the middle of nothing but fields. There was one road. It ran right along one side, and only one bus that took you into the nearest town situated in the suburbs around the main city. My old town. The buses were small and came by the hour, then after that, a Tube took me the rest of the way. I skipped down the stone steps outside my school’s entrance, just as the bus pulled away from the bus stop and tore down the narrow road.

  “No!” I groaned.

  I flopped down on the bottom step and buried my head in my hands. An hour. I’d have to wait a fricking hour until another bus. I wouldn’t get to The Hut for ages now. Not that I cared about what kind of impression I gave, but I didn’t want John to think I bailed and call the police.

  “You okay?” Sam asked.

  I looked up to see that he was staring down at me.

  “What’re you still doing here?” I asked accusingly.

  “Checking out books from the library,” he answered, lifting a bulging rucksack. “Looks like I’ve got a lot to catch up on. Thought I best get reading.”

  “Oh.”

  “You miss the bus?” he guessed.

  “Yup.”

  “You want a ride?”

  I bit down on my lip, contemplating the offer. On the one hand, it would mean getting to work comfortably and in a shorter time. On the other hand, that meant sitting in a car – alone – with a person I barely knew. Good thing I could defend myself if he tried anyt
hing.

  “That would be great.” I stood up and followed him around the school to the car park. Most of the cars were gone, and I spotted his black Mercedes easily.

  “Nice car.” I ran my hand along the door.

  “Thanks. It was a present for agreeing to move here without kicking and screaming…much.”

  “Your parents are decent. I’d be made to do it, argument or not.” I slid onto the leather seat, breathing in the new car smell. My favorite of all smells.

  He pulled out of the school grounds and began to speed down the tiny road towards town.

  “Where to?”

  “The Hut. You remember the way?”

  He nodded. “Yeah. Why there? It’s a bit early to be going, right? Or did I not get the vibe right? I do that sometimes.”

  “I work there,” I answered.

  “Oh. Right.”

  I turned to face the window, staring out at the plush green fields filled with cows. Maxwell had its own stables with its own Polo team. A team I’d been a part of until I quit last year. I wasn’t about to admit to anyone how much I missed it. There was no other feeling quite as exhilarating as the wind rushing past your face while on horseback.

  Obviously, competitiveness was in my blood, and there weren’t many other sports I could excel at without standing out too much. With Polo, it was less obvious and more about control than strength. It helped I’d been honing my control since I was six.

  However, it had been my mother, who’d encouraged me to join the Polo team, and now I couldn’t compete in a game without thinking about her and then becoming consumed with grief. I was no good to the team like that.

  “So,” I started, still not facing him. “How was hanging out with Sarah White and her clan today? Didn’t see you much...”

  “Awww, did you miss me?”

  I shot him a warning look. “Not really.”

  His face fell. “Oh. Well, I got a bit lost, and they found me. Started showing me around, and I felt like I owed it to them to hang with them for the day. It wouldn’t look good if I just ran off to sit with you after letting them help.”

 

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