I snap from my thoughts when he nudges me with his shoulder. His voice is filled with concern when he asks if my burger is okay. I nod my head and take a big bite of my Whopper. His smile is big and oh so damn sexy. “You have something right here.” I hold my breath as he uses his thumb to wipe mayonnaise from the corner of my mouth. I watch as he licks it from his thumb. Good god! I shove my burger in my mouth for another bite. I am not going to be the one to make a fool of myself and try to kiss him. I wouldn’t deny him if he did try to kiss me, but I am definitely not making the first move.
We hear a noise to our left and I move closer to him. Out of nowhere a stray cat comes stalking toward us. I break off a piece of my burger and toss it to him. A little thank you for giving me a reason to be closer to Blake.
We finish eating, and Blake tosses our wrappers and bag in the trash. When he is walking back toward me, he laughs. “Are you laughing at me?” He shrugs a shoulder. “Oh, my God, you are laughing at me.”
“I can’t help it. You look so cute in your kraft paper crown.” Okay, I give him that and laugh, too. I watch as he gets his phone from the back pocket of his jeans. He puts some music on and then places it down on the bench. “Dance with me? Our first dance got interrupted.” He holds his hand out for me to take. I give him mine.
I close my eyes when he brings me into his embrace. I wonder if he can feel how fast my heart is beating. I blink my eyes open and look to the sky. No storm is near. I close my eyes again and just feel him in my arms. I hope this night never ends.
Lost in the rumble of my car’s engine, I revel in my child-like joy as I near my building once more, and then drive right on past. I’m not done enjoying the moment. Dinner was far from fine dining, but I’d eat a fast food burger every night with Rochelle if she’d look at me the way she had out there in the park. Holding her against me and finally sensing that she was opening up to me was magical. I’d wanted to kiss her all night. Hell - I’d wanted to kiss her in the club the first time I met her, but I’d played it cool. We danced for a few songs before I took her hand and led her back to her place.
There was no question in my mind about the kiss that was coming at the end of our date. I’d kissed her impulsively, almost desperately in the coffee shop, but it hadn’t felt real; I felt like our first kiss was still coming. The only uncertainty was my ability to keep it at the front door. Knowing that she’d probably expect me to come in had the voice in my head urging me on. She’d practically offered herself to me already and I’d been the perfect gentleman. Giving into my desires then wouldn’t have been so bad. It wouldn’t be bad at all. I’m certain it would have been incredible.
Rochelle started to twirl her hair with her other hand as we approached her building and I could tell she was wondering what was coming too. The fact that both of us were nervous heightened my excitement; I hadn’t felt this way in a long time and it seemed to be something new for her as well. I don’t ever take advantage of women, but I wasn’t one to deny an opportunity to go to bed with a beauty when given the chance. Sex on the first date and one-night stands were no stranger to me, but there had never been pressure in those situations. This was different.
And Rochelle… from what she’d shown me, she was far from uncomfortable with sex, but she was still fretting about the decision we faced just as much as I was. Knowing that it mattered as much to her made my heart beat just a little faster. When she spun herself toward me outside her door, I took her other hand and just stared into her eyes. The night had been a complete success. In a matter of hours her demeanor had almost entirely changed. She’d gone from wanting to flee in terror to not wanting the night to be over any more than I did.
“This is me,” she said sheepishly.
“This was an amazing night,” I said.
“Mmhmm...” she replied softly, the sound hanging in the air like a sweet sigh. She looked up at me with the most adorable expression I’d ever seen.
It was my first crush all over again, only stronger. I wanted to kiss her and then fast forward to the next time I could see her again without any delay. I knew that every moment between would drag and that she’d occupy my mind in the most wonderfully distracting way for the foreseeable future.
I pulled her hands forward just hard enough to bring her body close to mine, and then released them, bringing one hand to her cheek and the other to the small of her back as I held her tightly. The shape of her body against mine was exhilarating. It felt more electrifying than it had the last time I had laid a woman down naked in my bed. Everything was more with Rochelle. Our lips touched softly at first, and we kissed slowly. I felt a shudder in my body as she opened herself to the kiss, her lips curled up in a smile as our mouths moved against each other with more urgency. Magic was the only word suitable for that moment. It was everything. When we finally parted, we just hovered there, only a fraction of an inch between us, our lips still grazing one another as we breathed.
“I hope it goes without saying that I want to see you again,” I said, finally opening my eyes to see her looking back at me with a desire unlike anything I’d seen before.
“Do you… want to…” she said, looking very nervous and biting her lower lip.
Yes! I wanted to, so badly! It was everything I wanted.
“More than you know,” I replied, giving her another brief kiss. “I don’t want to do anything to risk this evening though. You made me happier than I can put into words. Let’s save that for another night, shall we?”
A flurry of emotions flickered in Rochelle’s eyes; first came disappointment, then confusion, before she seemed to settle on appreciation. I took that as confirmation that I’d made the right decision. Her body wanted the same thing mine did, but her heart longed to be valued as more than just a guaranteed good time. One more kiss, and I opened her building door for her and watched her disappear inside.
It was a blissful walk around the block as I waited for my cab to arrive. Rather than going up to my place when the driver dropped me off, I jumped in my own car and hit the road to enjoy the night some more before letting it end. I wasn’t willing to give up the drive until I started to feel the exhaustion from my busy day set in. By the time I parked and made it up to my condo, I just flopped in bed and passed out, fully dressed.
I woke the next morning having dreamt of nothing except Rochelle. Most of my dreams finished the night differently, with me taking full advantage of her willingness to let me come in, and exploring the side of her that she’d offered earlier in the night. The last thing that I wanted was for her to feel used, but something about tying her up and the idea that she might want me to use her was very arousing. My morning shower was a longer one as I let the fantasy replay in my head and eased the tension before it kept me so distracted that I was unable to work.
With that out of my head, there was still no chance that Rochelle wouldn’t be on my mind, but I was at least no longer fixated on the images of her body and all the things I wanted to do to it. Instead, I began to reflect more on her situation. She was in a line of work that she didn’t enjoy and that I had no desire to see her continue if we were going to be together. I had the resources to give her everything she needed without working another day in her life, but I knew that she wouldn’t want to feel like I was buying her. No matter my intentions, that might feel just as bad to her as continuing where she was. I needed to find a way to protect her without just offering to pay her way.
Randy. It was that bastard Randy that needed to be dealt with. I’d taken her warnings about him very seriously, but if I just walked away, there’d be nothing I could do to protect her if she continued working there. Praying that she wouldn’t be angry, I knew what I had to do.
I texted Randy on my way to the car and was already driving to the club when he called me back. He agreed to meet me there, and I had just enough time to make the moves necessary before I arrived.
“Blake,” the stout man shouted as I climbed from my car.
“I thought
more about our deal,” I said, shaking his hand with a bit more grip than I had the first time. “I have another proposal. I want to buy 60% of the club, but I will double my offer.”
“WHAT?!” Randy bellowed, somewhere between shock and anger. “You want me to sell you a majority?”
“For what I believe to be a fair price for sole ownership, yes. Take it or leave it, but 50% is no longer on the table. You can still run it, but my way.”
“That’s not what we…”
“Listen, Randy, I don’t like you much and I’d really rather just walk away, but there is something to your club that I think is worth investing in. It isn’t you, so don’t make me change my mind unless you’re sure you’re ready to walk away.”
The man was not a quick processor, and I could see his wheels turning for more than a minute while we stood in front of his club.
“Deal,” he finally conceded.
“The papers should be on your fax machine now,” I said, receiving another flash of surprise.
“You were pretty damn confident I’d say yes,” he muttered.
“I was,” I said with a confident smile.
We went inside without saying much, and he looked everything over before signing. It was no trick, but I was very much in charge - effective immediately. I knew it was a losing investment financially. I’d make the money back, but not nearly as quickly as I would have with another club.
“Happy?” Randy asked, his villainous, weaselly grin making my stomach churn.
“Almost,” I said, filing the papers in my bag. “You are done with your backroom bullshit. If your girls want to let the men have some fun, they can strip, they can play, but there is no sex in this club. None!”
“I told you…”
“Shut your fat face before I hire a new manager. I’d rather not, but if I don’t trust you, I’ll just sideline you and let you collect your take.”
“You can’t do that!” Randy protested, standing up as if that made him any taller at all.
“You’re mistaken,” I said, just as the reality hit him and he deflated in front of me. “I can do whatever I want now. I own 60% of this club. No sex. You got that?”
“Fine.”
“And no one knows I am the owner. That’s between us. This is your idea. Any of your staff find out about me, and you’re done. I’ll write you out completely.”
“You can’t do that!” he shouted.
“You missed that did you?” I asked. “Did you see the nondisclosure policy?”
“Yes, but…”
“I made sure it covered your staff too. If you breathe a word of this to them, I own your entire club for fees rendered. So on second thought, tell them all you want, just know that I will enforce that.”
His face, the same egg shape as his body below it, looked like he wanted to hit me. That really would have made my day. I packed up my bag and saw myself out, a big smile plastered on my face. I jumped back in my car and texted Rochelle. I wouldn’t tell her what I’d done, but I really wanted to see her again!
I stepped into my apartment not really wanting to say goodnight to Blake. Once I shut the door softly, I twisted and put my back against it. My heart is in my throat. I listen to his footsteps as he takes the hallway to the stairs. I wait until the sound of his footsteps are completely gone before I move away. Stepping over to the light, I turn it on. I run over to my bathroom area and look in the mirror. I put my hands on the sink’s edge and lean in closer, paying close attention to my lips. They don’t look any different, but they sure as hell feel different. I reach up and touch my reflection, outlining my mouth with my finger, then I draw a heart. I drop my hand and back away. Such a childish thing to do. I am not a teenager receiving her first kiss, nope I am a grown woman who has had more mouths on me than I care to remember.
I go over to the window and peek outside, quickly getting lost in thought and barely noticing the way my hand keeps tracing the shape of my lips. Tonight was like stepping into a fairy tale. The slow dancing in the park and sharing a few pecks here and there. It was magical even though it was barely a touch of lips. I felt my guard slipping away the longer we were together. I wanted to fight it, but there was this magnetic pull to him that I could not seem to control. It’s like the universe is stealing my willpower of keeping him out of my life.
I turn my attention toward the door when I hear footsteps. My heart skips a few beats. I tiptoe over to the door and put my ear against it. I frown, realizing it’s just one of my neighbors returning home. I twist around, putting my back to the cheap door once again. My mind drifts back to that kiss just on the other side of this door. It was very different from anybody else’s. It felt as if I was someone special for the few moments his mouth was on mine. I am never going to forget how it felt for as long as I live.
I step away from the door when I can hear voices from the adjoining apartment. Reality hits me like a ton of rocks. It is late and I need to get to bed so I can work tomorrow. I need to make money or else I’m not going to have a place to live. I slip off my tennis shoes, they are definitely not glass slippers. I don’t live in a fairy tale.
I toss the couch cushions off and unfold my bed. I picked up the blanket from the armrest, the same one Blake wrapped around my shoulders earlier in the night. The way he looked at me, I saw the desire in his blue eyes. He wanted me. He has better control of himself than I have. As degrading as that was for me, I wanted him to take me. It was the first time in my life I was offering myself willingly. I wanted him to do whatever his heart desired to my body.
I shake my head. I need to stop thinking about Blake, stop living in fantasyland, and go to sleep. Blake really isn’t going to marry a girl like me. The sooner I accept that, the better off I’ll probably be. I have to keep going forward and just be me, so that means, I have rent to pay and need to get my ass to work early tomorrow.
It no sooner feels like I’ve just drifted off to sleep when I hear a door slam. With blurry eyes, I look at the alarm clock. Holy shit, it’s after ten! I jump out of bed. I need to get my ass going, I wanted to be at work by noon. I go to my kitchen area to make coffee. I open the cupboard door. “Shit, shit, shit,” I say out loud. I forgot coffee filters, and I really need caffeine this morning. I go to my door and slip on my tennis shoes. The corner store better have some, or this is going to be one helluva long day. I grab my purse and I’m out the door. I’ll just run in and run right back out. I’ll still have plenty of time to be at Leather Shots by noon if I hurry.
I am rushing back with the filters in hand when I see someone at my door. “Hey, what are you doing?” I ask.
The apartment manager looks at me. “Eviction, what does it look like?”
“You can’t do this. I have nowhere else to go!”
She snickers at me. “Not my problem.”
I narrow my eyes at her.
Her eyes travel the length of my body. “Pretty girl like you, you must have been on the wrong street corner lately.”
Ouch! That stung! “I have some money. I can give it to you and give you the rest tomorrow.”
“How much do you have?”
“You have to let me inside to count it.”
“You have two seconds.”
I go into my apartment and she follows me inside. I have a hiding spot, but I don’t want her to see it. “Can you turn around?”
“Lady, I don’t have time for this.”
‘Yeah, you might miss the morning talk shows while eating donuts’. I put my hands on my hips and stared at her. She turns around even though I could tell she didn’t want to. I reach under the little lip of the countertop and undo the tape holding my money to the bottom, then count it out. “I have one-twenty.”
She snickers again and I want to slap her old wrinkly face. “You owe eight hundred dollars. What is one-twenty going to do? You are outta here.”
She starts to push me toward the door. “How much do I need to stay? I can’t make all of it today, but I can make some o
f it.”
“All of it.”
She shoves me again. “Will you please let me take my clothes? Please.”
“One bag. That’s it. You come up with the money by the end of the week, I’ll let you back in. Better get your ass moving, I am giving you five minutes.”
I hurry and get my duffle bag that I use to take my clothes to the laundromat. I start shoving my clothes inside until it’s almost full, then I grab my toiletries from the bathroom, and a box of cereal bars from the kitchen area. I walk to the door. “Thank you.”
She holds out her hand. I reach into my sweatpants pocket and hand over a hundred dollars. “What about the twenty?”
“I need money to pay for a cab or I can’t get to work.”
“You are lucky I kinda like you. You always paid rent until now.”
I don’t even know what to say, so I say nothing.
“End of the week or else I rent to someone else,” she adds.
I get outside to flag down a cab. I could burst out crying right now, but it would do me no good. I have to pull up my big girl pants and own that I fucked up. I really didn’t fuck up, it’s just that work has been slower lately. Randy is driving customers away faster than he can get new ones. If it weren’t for my regulars, I would be even worse off than I am now. I probably would have been on the streets a long time ago.
I pay the cab driver when he stops in front of Leather Shots. Getting my bag, I throw the strap over my shoulder. When I step out of the cab, I look up to read the name in neon lights and notice the sky is very gray. I get chills but I force myself to ignore them. When I pull open the door, I am hit in the face with the smell of disinfectant spray. Christ, did a Lysol bomb go off here? I wave a hand in front of my face to clear the air.
“Roxy, my girl,” the sound of Randy’s voice causes bile to rise in my throat, “come join the rest of us. I have an announcement to make.”
Inside the Storm Page 5