by Joya Ryan
…
Holding a bag of takeout in one hand, Nolan looked down to see Ava’s big green eyes staring up at him with shock and embarrassment.
“It’s not…I mean, this isn’t what it looks like,” she said, slamming the top closed. Which made something within the box of awesome start buzzing. “Shit,” she whispered, then dug back into the box until she found the source of the sound. Though everything was packaged, a button on what looked to be a pretty serious vibrator had switched on.
Ava ripped at the packaging and finally shut off the toy.
“If I’d known you were inviting me to a sex party, I would have brought my assless chaps.”
Her mouth hung open. She looked at him, then at the box, then finally stood.
“I wasn’t expecting this package today.”
“What package were you expecting?”
She rolled her eyes, but he couldn’t help it. Teasing her was fun, and she was cute as hell when she was annoyed.
“Are you going to come in or stand in my doorway like a creeper all night?”
He stepped through the door. “I think we should work on your hostess skills. Perhaps instead of calling the guest you invited over a creeper, you could offer a beverage, or at least a sex toy.”
A blush stained her cheeks as she closed and locked the door, but in true Ava fashion, she recovered quickly. “I wasn’t aware you enjoyed sex toys. And would you like a beverage?” she asked sweetly. Her sarcasm was sexy, right down to the little glare she gave.
“I enjoy using them on women,” he said and followed her into the kitchen, setting the take out down on the counter.
She eyed him over her shoulder. When she bent over to take cookies out of the oven, he about went to his knees, because he had a prime view of her perfect ass encased in all that tight thin material. Christ, he hadn’t thought about anything but that perfect ass since the other night.
His worlds were colliding, and he couldn’t bring himself to pump the breaks. Not yet. When she was satisfied and moved on from Myth, which she would, Nolan would have to move on, too. But she was too good to let go of yet. Especially now that he had a piece of her she’d never shared with anyone.
Only him.
And he’d kept her safe. Hadn’t hurt her. Only brought her pleasure.
A feeling of pride and ownership came over him. Something he shouldn’t feel. Something he had no right to feel.
She didn’t share it with me. She shared it with Myth.
He closed his eyes for a moment and tried to recall the moment when keeping himself and Myth separate had shifted from being a good thing to an annoying thing.
“Is that part of your job for prepping?” she asked. He opened the cartons of food, and she handed him two plates so he could dish them both up.
“Huh?”
“The sex toy comment. You said you used them on women.”
He handed her a plate full of noodles, made a mental note to come back for a cookie, and followed her into the living room. With his dinner in hand, he sat in the chair across the coffee table from her, while she settled in on the couch.
“I just like using them from time to time with women. Not for a job.”
She took a bite of her noodles and looked at him. “Sorry. Obviously you have a life. It’s not all about setting up scenes.”
He wanted to scoff. The thing was, lately, his life actually had been little more than setting up scenes. Even his ménage with Will and Penelope hadn’t involved intimacy. It had been club business, nothing more.
And then Ava had come in. She was supposed to be nothing more than club business, too, but he couldn’t help but care for her. He needed to know she was safe while she was under his care, and he wouldn’t let her go without knowing she’d stay safe long after she left him.
“So…” He smirked. “Are you going to tell me why you had a trunk load of pleasure devices delivered to your door, or are we going to just keep ignoring the giant box of sex toys in the room?”
“Isn’t it ignore the ‘elephant’ in the room?”
“You have an elephant in that box? I’ve heard of that model. Apparently it’s huge.”
She gave a small laugh. “It’s for work.”
“I thought you were in marketing?”
“I am. I have to pitch to this client that sells this merchandise. We want them to hire us as their new marking team.”
“So it’s only natural you get to know what they’re selling.”
“Yeah, only I wasn’t expecting all that.” She cleared her throat and looked at him. “So how was your day?”
“Not as good as yours, it would seem.”
“Shut up.” She laughed and threw a piece of carrot at him. “Seriously, what did you do?”
“I had the day off, actually. I don’t get many, so I caught up on chores and errands.”
“Chores and errands?”
“What? I like a clean home. And it’s not like I never leave the club.”
She nodded. “Fair enough. I just can’t imagine you Swiffering.”
“Oh, baby, I Swiffer a mean floor.”
She laughed, and so did he. The sound was musical, and he wanted to hear it again.
“I admire that. Taking care of your home. Most men are slobs and expect women to clean up after them.” Her eyes blinked fast, like she hadn’t meant to say that out loud, then she looked down at her food.
“I’d never expect a woman to take care of me like that. I actually like taking care of others.”
“That’s because you were raised well,” she said quietly.
“What about you? You seem to hate the idea of Swiffering. You like to be taken care of?”
She shook her head. “I like being alone. Taking care of myself. When you add another person, things just get…messy.”
“Hence the Swiffer.”
She smiled, but it didn’t reach her eyes. Whatever had happened to her went deep. Someone had hurt her, taken advantage of her in some way. He admired her strength, but he could see the hesitation in her eyes.
He’d give just about anything to know who’d caused her such pain. He’d hunt the son of a bitch down and promise Ava he’d never let anyone hurt her like that again.
He went to ask, but she sighed and smiled, and he remembered that this wasn’t about what he wanted. He had to respect her boundaries, and if she didn’t want to open up, he couldn’t make her.
“So the other night…” Man, she was good. The breezy tone of her voice and gleam in her eye almost made him believe the illusion that she was back to confident Ava, and the moment of pain he’d glimpsed in her had never happened. “I was hoping to talk to you about it.”
“Okay,” he said. “I was hoping you would.”
“Really? Why?”
Because he wanted to make sure she was okay. Because if he couldn’t help her heal the past, he at least wanted to keep her safe today. Because he’d walked out that door with a brick lodged in his chest and hadn’t been right since.
“Because I want make sure everything is lining up with your expectations.”
Smooth. Real smooth. The light in her eyes flickered, like she’d been hoping for more of an answer. But he’d gone with something casual. As always.
“Actually, I was hoping to get your advice.” She set her plate down. “Myth has been great. But I haven’t been able to really touch him or reciprocate.”
“You want to reciprocate?” Nolan almost groaned, and his cock shot hard in his jeans.
“Yes. You know him, right? How do I go about doing that if he won’t let me really touch him? What should I do? Every time I push him, he pushes back and just takes me over—”
“I thought that’s what you wanted.”
“It is,” she said quickly. “But I want to please him, too.” Her eyes met his. “Tell me. How do I please him?”
Damn it, he wanted to jump across the coffee table and kiss the hell out those pouty lips. He also wanted to tell her exactly what
he’d love for her to do to him. But he couldn’t exactly do that without violating their arrangement.
He set his plate on the coffee table and rested his forearms on his knees. How to keep a distance but get closer at the same time…
A light bulb went off.
“You want to know what he’d like and how to please him?”
She nodded eagerly.
Shit, Nolan was going straight to hell for this, but she had asked.
“He’d want to see you have pleasure. Watch you take joy in pleasuring him.”
“How do you mean?”
“You really want to know?”
“Yes, so much,” she said.
Nolan got up, went to the box of goodies she’d gotten, and grabbed the vibrator she’d opened earlier. It was long, not too thick, and just what he was looking for. He handed it to her and resumed his place in his chair across the coffee table from her.
“He’d want you to listen, but since he can’t talk, I’ll practice with you.”
She glanced at the silver vibrator in her hand, then back at him.
“When I say that he’d want to see you take pleasure in what you do to him, that means he’d want you to silently obey and love every second.”
He watched her throat work on a hard swallow. He read her easily. Perceptive woman, she knew exactly where he was going with this.
“You say you push his buttons and he pushes back? Okay, but let me ask you something. Have you let him truly take over since you started at Serve?”
She bit the inside of her cheek. “I guess not. I’ve goaded him. Tried to push for more. Tried to take over even on occasion.”
“Of course you have.” He smiled. “I would expect nothing less from a strong woman like you. But this is your fantasy, and you haven’t really embraced it yet.”
She nodded. “You’re right.”
“Take off your pants and spread your legs wide.”
Her eyes shot to his, and he cocked his head. She’d either tell him to fuck off… or she’d do what he said. Either way, he’d know how the night, and likely whatever semblance of a relationship they had, would go.
“Practice,” she said, keeping her eyes on him as she stood and peeled her pants and panties down.
God, she was amazing. Whatever fear she had about commitment, or the real world versus Serve, she wasn’t shy about her body. No, she was on a mission to experience everything she could. That much was clear, had been clear since the day she’d sat in his office with a single word scribbled on her questionnaire.
She sat back down on the couch and spread her legs, showing off that perfect pussy he knew firsthand tasted of honey. He stifled a hiss.
Stay focused. You’re Nolan now, not Myth.
“Good.” He crossed his arms and sat back in his chair. “Now, to please your mystery man, he’d want what any man wants—that lush little mouth wrapped around his cock.”
She nodded.
“But he’d want you to love it.”
“I would,” she whispered.
“Oh? Show me how much just the thought turns you on.” He lifted his chin at the vibrator next to her.
She grabbed it and ran it along her already glistening folds. Fuck, he wanted her so bad. He called on every ounce of will he had to get through this moment.
“He’d want to take you deep. Wrap his fingers in your hair and bury his cock until it hit the back of your throat.”
A soft moan escaped her, and she slowly pushed the tip of the phallus into her pussy. She was getting off on just the thought of sucking him off.
Not him…Myth.
He cursed and told his brain to shut up and continue.
“No pushing his buttons. You’d be on your knees. Mouth open, waiting. Letting him fuck your pretty mouth however he wanted, and you’d say nothing but thank you.”
She pushed the vibrator even deeper, and damn it, he was about to come in his jeans at the sight alone.
“He’d want to see this. See you take pleasure in his pleasure. Watch how much you love the feel of him down your throat. The taste of him. Prove to him how wet his cock makes you, even when it’s not inside you.”
She took the rest of the length into her depths and subtly began rolling her hips.
“Turn it on,” he ordered.
She did, and her eyes went wide.
“Keep fucking that vibrator until it makes you come. Think of Myth. Think of everything he makes you feel. Think of every time he’s made you come. Think of his mouth, his tongue, his teeth. You want to please him? Then let him really have you. Let him consume every inch of you. Every thought you have. Every ounce of touch. All of it. Give it to him.”
She worked the toy faster and licked her lips over and over. She was thinking of his cock. Good.
“This is what he’d want,” Nolan said.
She squeezed her eyes shut, and just when he thought she would come, she stopped and let the vibrator slip from her. Breathing hard, she closed her legs and looked at him.
“Okay,” she rasped. “Now I know for next time.”
It was all Nolan could do to keep his jaw off the floor. The woman had denied herself an orgasm to keep the line between Myth and Nolan firmly in place. Something he should be doing as well.
He nodded once.
“Yes, now you know.”
On a shaky breath, she stepped into her pants and pulled them back on. “I guess all that’s left is to set up another scene. Thank you for your advice, Nolan.”
Something like a knife twisted in his gut. He smiled past the stab and said, “Anytime, sweetheart.”
Chapter Eleven
Ava shuffled through her purse, grabbing her keys, and opened her front door. It had been a long couple of days. The presentation was coming along nicely. The downside was that every time she even thought about her potential client, Xspot Inc., she thought of the night with Nolan.
Close call.
Yeah, there was little left between them in terms of exposure. He’d seen her naked after scenes, and now he’d seen her spread wide and pleasuring herself in her own home. But he’d never seen her come, never touched her, and she’d never touched him. There was still the distance she needed. And that was something she was clinging to, the only thing keeping her fear from rising up.
Fear that she was starting to think of him—to want to be with him—more than casually.
Stupid brain.
Stupid hormones.
Serve almost made things difficult in some ways. Because she couldn’t see her mystery lover, her time with him was like a dream, and it was starting to bleed into her encounters with Nolan. Her mind couldn’t keep them straight.
Maybe she needed to do better at keeping that line. Or walk away. But when she thought about fading away and going back to her “normal” life, sadness crept in. Because everything she was looking to escape by attending Serve, like her past and her own self-doubts, was fading away. She had learned a lot about herself in the short time she’d been with Myth and Nolan, for that matter.
She didn’t want to give up Nolan’s friendship. And she didn’t want to give up Myth. But if that was the case, she needed to get her head right and keep the hard limit she’d set. No emotions. Maybe she needed a do-over. Spend time with Nolan outside the club and not do anything sexual. Then she could convince herself that the line she was tripping over really wasn’t an issue. Convince herself that her ex hadn’t left a raw gap in her stomach that hurt every time she thought of the manipulation she’d lived through.
She shook her head, dislodging every black memory she could, and knew the one person that could make her smile right then.
She dialed Nolan’s number and waited.
“Well, hello,” he said, happiness in his voice.
She smiled, liking the idea that her call made him happy. “Hi. How are you?”
“Better now.”
She heard the boom of the music from the club in the background. “I didn’t mean to bother you whil
e you’re working.” Suddenly the image of him being with a woman flashed in her mind, and she didn’t like it. Would he really stop sexing up some chick to answer the phone, though? She hoped not. Hopefully he was there tonight as the manager, not as a member.
Not that she should care either way.
We’re just friends.
“You’re never a bother. How are you?”
“Feeling a little caged,” she said, looking around her apartment. She hadn’t exactly meant to let that slip, but it was so easy talking with Nolan. “I know I’m coming in soon for a scene, but I have half the day off tomorrow and was wondering if maybe you wanted to hang out for a few hours in the afternoon.”
Seconds passed. Then a few more seconds. She almost asked if he was still there, but she still could hear the music.
Should she have added “just as friends” to the end of her request? She knew he had his own hang ups about even the hint of a relationship.
Then he said, “Are you psychic?”
“Excuse me?”
“If you’re a psychic, you should have put that on the form.”
She laughed. “Uh, I’m not a psychic, and I’m very aware at this point that you think I should have put a lot of things on the form.”
“That’s true. It’s just crazy, because I was going to see if I could pick you up this weekend to take you out.”
She frowned. “Out where? And this weekend?”
“Yeah, I can bump my plans forward.”
“Wait, what plans? I thought—”
“You’re the psychic, sweetheart. But the answer is still yes. I’ll pick you up tomorrow at three. Does that work?”
“Yeah, but are you going to tell me what we’re doing?”
“No.” She heard the smile in his voice when he finished with, “But I have a feeling it will cure your problem of feeling caged. See you tomorrow.”
With that, the line went dead.
…
After the phone call with Nolan yesterday, Ava had spent all of her brainpower trying to figure out what he had planned. Now she was living it. Problem was, she still wasn’t certain what they were doing. She glanced around. What the hell was Nolan thinking? Standing in a massive dome, wearing a jump suit, she looked at the big spring mat they stood on, then up, up to the high ceiling.