Chapter 39
WHO AM I NOW?
These motherfuckers must think that I’m playing with their asses. That bitch must have lost her fucking mind, asking me to let them live. She should be counting her lucky fucking stars that she’s still breathing. I stand in Breeze’s fancy bathroom and wonder what happened to the old me. I know that I am a shitty dude at times, but this? No one would have told me a year ago that this would be happening. But what can I do? They killed my kid, and they killed the best thing that has ever happened to me. Man, fuck that, and fuck them. Both of them have to die. As I look around the bathroom it hits me, I really didn’t know what the fuck I was going to do when I was driving over here. How could I? Nothing could have prepared me for that scene at June’s house. She was just lying there, almost lifeless. I thought that she was dead until I heard her moan. When I walked over to her, she was holding something in her hand.
“They…they… told me. I know who you really are.”
I took the DVD out of her hand and damn near lost my mind once I realized that she was holding my work, our work on Baby, Bi the Way.
“June, baby, hold on!” I was panicking. Her body started to shake uncontrollably. Blood was shooting out of her mouth and I could tell that she couldn’t breathe. Before I could get her any help, I knew that she was gone. I must have sat there for an hour trying to piece everything together. But no matter how I played it out in my head, Jamar and that bitch were behind it. So I did what I had to do. It killed me to just leave June there, without calling anyone. But I got up, whipped down the apartment, and got all of my shit out of there, including the DVD them motherfuckers used to shatter the new life I was planning on starting.
NOW, OR NEVER
Damn, I shouldn’t have had all of those drinks. I should have kept a clear mind for this. I turn on the water and splash some on my face. It helps, but I still feel messed up. Fuck me for not staying clear of the liquor. Oh, well, at least they are tied up. They aren’t going nowhere. “Okay, Tyree, think. What are you going to do with them?” I thought out loud to myself. On the way here, I picked up a large duffle bag. I just kept picturing myself cutting them up, while they are still alive, and stuffing them in the large bag. I felt that they deserved as much, but now, now that I have calmed down, that doesn’t seem like such a good idea. One, it would be a lot of work, two, we’re in Breeze’s house. How would he explain…wait. What the fuck am I talking about? Fuck Breeze, and fuck everyone else. I am the one who has lost everything.
So that’s it, I’m a chop them motherfuckers up and throw them out like the garbage that they are. I gotta sit down for a minute, damn, I’m fucked up. But wait, why is the bathroom spinning, why am I sweating? FUCK…that bitch got me. As I try to stand up, I fall right back down. My legs won’t work, and my vision is getting fuzzier with every second that passes. I have to get it together. They can’t fucking live. I have to at least kill that bitch for drugging me. Come on nigga, pull it together. Again I pull myself up. I knock over almost everything that’s on the sink, but at least I’m standing. Taking one step at a time, I make it to a freshly pressed suit Breeze left hanging behind the bathroom door. As I reach for it, I feel my legs giving out, but I manage to grab onto the suit and it comes down with me. It takes everything in me to get Breeze’s clothes on. I fight to get dressed, and I devise my plan. I’ll kill both Jazzy and Jamar and just leave their bodies here. I’ll burn the suit when I’m done, and the cufflinks will stay in the fireplace. This will give the cops reason to believe that Breeze did it, and that he was trying to cover it up by burning the clothes he killed them in. That’s right, I am gonna go hard on all them niggas. Like I said before, fuck them all!
Now I just have to build up the will to get up off this floor, but I don’t know how far my strength will take me. I put my all into it and manage to stand on my feet. Little by little, I make it out of the bathroom. One step at a time, that’s right. But you know what? I ask myself. If I want to make it to my gun, and at the very least, kill that bitch, I’m gonna have to make a run for it. So with legs that feel like cooked spaghetti noodles, I push my body forward. I see the gun sitting on the table right where I left it. I’m only five feet away from it, I can do this. I’m almost there. I’ll just kill her and take care of Jamar when I wake up. Yeah, that’s what I’ll do, but as soon as I feel the blow to my head, I know that there will be a change of plans.
*****
What the fuck just happened? How did they get loose, and who the fuck hit me? I start to get up, and just start swinging but I hear DeeDee and Jamar standing over me.
“Just aim the fucking gun and shot. Now, if you don’t want to do it, give it here. I’ve been dying to shoot this dude for a while now.”
DeeDee, what the fuck is she doing here? She’s been dying to shoot me? I actually liked her and thought we were cool. Ebony mentioned that bitch was jealous of our relationship. Well I guess she’s going to have to die, too. Fuck, here comes Jasmine. I need to time this right, because all three of them are standing around me. I know Jamar’s punk ass won’t shoot me, but he might panic when I charge DeeDee. I’ll need to take her out first, or I won’t stand a chance.
“Plus, after what he did to your face, hell, our faces, we may never be the same.”
I wish Jasmine would just shut the fuck up. I’m going to save her ass for last because that bitch needs to know I’m not the one to fuck with. Just when I ball my fist up I hear the gun go off, and feel the heat. That nigga actually shot me not once, but twice. The third shot misses me, but my shoulder and arm are burning so bad that I almost scream from the pain. I play dead, and let them think they’ve won but the game isn’t over. I’ll never stop until they feel the kind of pain that I’m feeling. I control my breathing, and wait like a tiger hunting its prey.
I know the gun is still beside me, but it’s on the side he shot me on. I can’t move that arm, so I’ll have to wait a little longer. They start to leave so I wait a few more seconds and finally look up. While they’re outside I maneuver my body so I can grab the gun with my good arm. I want to run outside and just shoot all three of them, but I know Breeze’s nosey ass rich neighbors will wake up to see what’s going on. It looks like I’ll have to wait to finish what I started with Jamar and that fucking bitch that ruined my life. I hear the front door open so I hide my hand holding the gun under my body, and lay my head back down.
“How the fuck do I get myself in these situations? Where the fuck is my cell phone?” I hear DeeDee talking to herself as she walks pass me. I wait until she’s over by the table about to grab her cell phone before I make my move.
“Bobby better not give me any shit for this either, I just saved two of his top billers.”
“DeeDee.”
I wait until she looks over at me.
“FUCK YOU.”
As I point the gun at her, her eyes damn near pop out of her head. I pull the trigger, watch her take a few steps back, then pull it again, again, again, and again until I see her fall to the ground. For a second there’s silence, and then I hear a crash outside the patio. I quickly run to the patio door ready to empty the magazine on whoever is outside. I slide the door open and see her lying there.
“PLEASE DON’T SHOOT ME. I DIDN’T SEE ANYTHING.”
I know this bitch is lying, but I want to know why she’s here.
“Tanya, what the fuck are you doing here, and what happened to you? You look like you’ve had a rough ass night.”
Her face is all red, and scratched up. She also has a couple of bald spots that look like they were caused by someone pulling a hand full of her weave out of her head.
“Jasmine, she threw coffee in my face, and then she attacked me when I couldn’t see. I knew she’d be here so I wanted a chance to get her back.”
“How long have you been here?”
“I just got here.”
“You’re fucking lying, bitch.”
I point the gun at her, pretending like I’m ready to kill her.
r /> “Okay, okay, wait. I’ve been here for an hour or two. Well, I honestly don’t know how long I’ve been here. When I first got here I saw DeeDee sneaking around back so I followed her. When I realized she wasn’t moving, or going inside I was stuck. I knew I wouldn’t get close to Jasmine with DeeDee around, so I waited to see if she would leave. I knew something was wrong, so my curiosity got the best of me. When she finally snuck inside I was able to get close enough to see what was going on.”
“Well, you know what they say curiosity killed the cat, and you just happen to be that dead fucking cat. I’m sorry it has to be this way, because you were always nice to me, but it is what it is.”
I aim the gun at her ready to shoot because I can’t let her live, she will turn me in for sure.
“WAIT, PLEASE WAIT, I PROMISE I WON’T TELL ANYONE. I NEVER LIKED DEEDEE ANYWAY. I LISTENED TO HER TALK JAMAR INTO SHOOTING YOU, SO SHE HAD IT COMING IF YOU ASK ME.”
She paused.
“Plus, she was mean, made fun of me, and never showed me the respect I deserved when I worked at Fantasy Pictures.”
“Why should I let you live?” I ask for the hell of it, but my mind is pretty much made up. She has to die.
“Because I want revenge just as bad as I know you do. Help me up, and I’ll prove it.”
She reached her hand out for me to grab it.
“Get up yourself bitch. What the fuck I look like?”
I watch her stand up, and brush the dirt off of her dress.
“Now what, how are you going to prove it to me?”
She has a lot of convincing to do, because I’m ready to drag her in the house, and shoot her too.
“Give me the gun. Let me finish her off.”
“BITCH, YOU MUST BE CRAZY. THE ONLY WAY YOU’RE FEELING THIS GUN IS WHEN IT GOES OFF ON YOU.”
“Look, I know what you’re thinking. I’ll hand her the gun, and she’ll shoot me, but you’re wrong. We can work together. You want revenge on Jamar, and I want revenge on Jasmine. Plus, if I shoot DeeDee then both of our prints are on the gun, and if anyone finds out we’ll both go down for her murder.”
I like the way she’s thinking. I’m definitely going to need help moving DeeDee’s big ass since my strong arm is fucked up, but I’m nervous about handing her the gun. On the other hand if she does shoots DeeDee then I know she’s one hundred percent down and committed to helping me.
“TANYA, I SWEAR TO GOD, IF YOU FUCK ME OVER AND TRY TO MAKE A MOVE, I’M TAKING YOU OUT.”
I walk her over to DeeDee, and stand behind Tanya so I can choke the shit out of her if she doesn’t do what she said she would. I reach forward and hand her the gun. Without hesitation or warning she points at DeeDee and shoots her in the face.
“See I told you,” She says as she hands the gun back in my direction. I grab it before speaking.
“Damn, you shot her right in the dome. I couldn’t even go that hard.”
“Well, at least she’s not getting back up like you did.”
“Oh, I put five rounds in her chest; she wasn’t getting back up.”
“So what are we going to do with her body?” she asks.
“I don’t know I didn’t think that far ahead yet, you fucked that part up when you scared me. Plus, my shoulder is killing me right now. Do you have any ideas?”
“We could always take her out to one of those jogging trails around here, strip her down, and leave her naked body lying in the bushes. Maybe the police will think one of her crazed fans stalked her, and killed her since she is sort of famous.”
“Damn, why didn’t I think of that? Good idea, but will need to come back and clean up this mess. I heard them say Breeze will be back in two days.”
*****
After dumping DeeDee’s body deep into the trail hoping some animals would come along and feast on her body, or at the very least buy us a few days before anyone found her we went back to Breeze’s house and cleaned up. I made Tanya do most of the work, because I couldn’t do much with one arm. I tried to clean up my wounds as best as possible since both bullets went straight through. Once Tanya was done cleaning up everything inside, and even cleaning up the pots she knocked over outside, we said our goodbyes.
“Thanks for helping me clean up. It doesn’t look like anything happened in here at all. You must’ve done some shit like this before,” I say and laugh, hoping she’ll think we’re cool.
“Well, being around the Cappello’s as much as I was, I witnessed a lot. They definitely are the kind of men you don’t want to fuck over, and I’ll just leave it at that.”
“Okay, well look it’s been real, but I think we need to go our separate ways. You got my cell phone number so if you find them before I do give me a call, and I’ll do the same. As far as being partners or going after them together, that is out of the question. I work better alone.”
“That’s fine with me. You let me live, so I owe you my life. Take care of them holes before they get infected.”
I watch her walk out, get in her car, and drive off. I wait a second, look around, and make sure I don’t make the mistake of leaving anything behind like those other dumb asses, and bounce.
*****
TWO WEEKS LATER
“I just finished unpacking all of my stuff. Are you sure Jamar isn’t coming back home? He left a lot of his stuff behind,” Ebony asks.
“Damn, I already told you to stop tripping. He’s not coming back. He sold me the house and told me I could have whatever he left behind.”
Damn, this bitch has only been here a week and she’s already getting on my nerves.
“That’s just stupid. I can’t believe he left that big ass TV, his furniture, and his paintings, he loved those. I mean I’m not complaining or anything, it just doesn’t seem like something he would do.”
“Well apparently he came into some money, and plans to start over and buy all new stuff.”
“Whatever, oh, well, enough about that loser. How are you feeling? Are your wounds healing okay?”
“Yeah, I’m fine.”
“Tyree, I’ve been meaning to ask you, how come when the police questioned you at the hospital, why did you tell them you didn’t know who shot you? I could tell you were lying, because you started talking all proper and shit. You know who shot you don’t you?”
“Of course I know who shot me. I didn’t tell the police because I’m going to handle it myself…as soon as I fully recover.”
“Will you tell me who did it?”
“Look, chill out with the questions. I don’t want you to get involved because who knows, they might try to kill you, too.”
I knew that would scare her and make her shut up about it. She walks over to me and wraps her arms around my neck.
“That’s so sad. I still can’t believe DeeDee is dead. Mr. Cappello said he’s not going to stop until he finds the sick fuck that killed her.”
I put the newspaper down on the table and turn around to face her. The more I lie, the easier it gets.
“I know I hope he finds whoever did that, too. She didn’t deserve to go out like that, especially after everything she did for my boo.”
I give her a quick kiss and start to get up.
“Hold up, since you’re so concerned with the news here lately, I have some news for you.”
June, why did you have to die? I didn’t want to settle for this bitch, but a man has needs and Ebony definitely has that area covered.
“Good news or bad news?” I ask with enthusiasm, as if I really care.
“Well, hopefully, you’ll find it to be good news.”
“Well, what is it? Spit it out already.”
She stands up straight, bashfully looks away, and then turns back to smile.
“I’m pregnant.”
Acknowledgements
Thank you from Matthew.
I want to thank my sister Rebecca, my cousins Sandy, Sherry, and Shelby, my good friends Faye, Crystal, Alexis, Lydia, Rachel, Chelsey, and Carnell, and everyone else
who has ever read my poems, chapters, etc... and enjoyed them. Your kind words gave me the motivation to keep writing, and for that I'm forever grateful. Leon, thanks for giving me the inspiration I needed to finish this book. You have no idea how much that helped, well maybe you do (smile). Philip, for being a great friend, and letting me use your home when I needed a quiet place to get away and write, which was quite often. Mya Ayo for creating a hot cover, I still can't believe that's our book cover. I love it. Brandie Randolph, I hope your good deed comes back to you, you did an amazing job, and I hope I get to work with you again in the near future. I also have to thank my favorite authors Donald Goines, Stephen King, Omar Tyree, James Patterson, Zane, and Fabiola Joseph for entertaining me with your words, thoughts, imaginations, and for inspiring me to want to try my hands at this, THANK YOU! Last but not least, my mom, for basically helping me get over my fear of putting out this novel, and telling me, “Fuck what people think, and say about you. If this is your dream, and what you want to do... then do it.” I needed to hear that from YOU, and that meant A LOT to me. I feel so much better now. I love you. Oh, and don't be mad, because I quoted you. I mean, you did say it (smile). If I forgot anyone, please don't take it personally. It's probably because you didn't even know I enjoyed writing, or I simply just forgot. I still love you, though.
Thank you from Fabiola.
I would like to thank my family and friends for supporting me. I’m sure I thanked most of you in the first book, so no name dropping in this one. Well, only for my new friends and readers, you all keep me going every day.
Thank you to the ladies of Diamond Eyes Book Club, Micole… you already know! Erica… you really are the best! Papaya, I hope you really do like to travel! Tracie, couldn’t have done it without you! Jeanette, you rock! I love your taste in music! B. Weiner, thanks for always spelling words for me, lol. Readers R Us. Sandy Barrett Sims, you are on my list. Thanks again! Carla Towns. Black Faithful Sisters And Brothers Book Club. Norlita Brown, thanks for the honesty. LD Hardy, such a good FB buddy! Glenda Wallace, you are good at what you do! Thanks! Author SK, I love an author who supports others. Denise Collier, I dream of readers such as you. Author Elizabeth LaShaun, thanks so much! I know it’s hard to find the time, but YOU did. Brandie Davis, (hey) Thanks again! My Urban Book Club. Mack Mama, thanks for the love! You are one of a kind! Sharon LadyShay. Terry Benjamin. Michelle DCBR Rawls, thanks so much. Radiah Hubbert. Malika B McLaughlin, thanks you. Brandie Randolph, you already know that I think you ROCK! You came in and saved this book. For that, I am so thankful! Editing Couture & More. Urban Hip-Hop & Street Literature. Ollie Moss, Sherika Williams. Tiffany Williams. Adina Spriggs. Sally McCargo. Adrenna Shipman. Dawn Jaspers, smile! Natoya Taylor, thanks so much! Christopher Joseph. Mya Ayo, thanks for the cover, so sexy! AAMBC. ARC Book Club Inc. All4One. We Read Urban Fiction. Black E-book Club. Urban Reviews. The Daring Show Reading Club. The Sexy Situations Literary Suite. Thank you all!
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