My eyes found Rhett and I wished I possessed an ability like his and we could have secret conversations back and forth. That would be so incredible and much more useful than time traveling. My gift was only good for forgetting things it seemed.
“I’m taking your mother shopping today for some good ole retail therapy. You two care to join us?” Dad offered after we were done eating.
“I’m not up for it to be honest,” I admitted.
“Are you sure, hun?” Mom pressed. “It might do you some good to get out of the house. It helped me a little.”
“No thank you. I’m not feeling it. I just want to hang around here.”
“You’re going to have to get out some time, sweetie.” Dad frowned.
“Well, today won’t be that time.”
“I’ve been trying to get her to go out too.” Rhett sighed.
“You don’t have to stay here if you’re bored of sitting around with me. I can handle myself. I’m a big girl.”
Even though I crave his presence.
“Nonsense, Molly,” Rhett chided. “I’m not sure what gives you those type of ideas. I’m starting to believe you’re the one who likes to argue. We’ll do whatever you want today.”
I put my head in my hands. I needed to stop putting myself down. Maddox would be pissed and he would come back and haunt me if he could. He was always smiling, so I should try to smile more for him.
Mom and Dad left shortly after that and Rhett looked at me expectantly.
“How about we go play that game we beat?” I asked. “I need more practice at it so Maddox and I can beat it in one day.”
Rhett scratched his cheek as he mulled it over. “If that’s what you want. You already know how I feel about it though.”
“Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think I’ll be able to move on once I beat this game with him. I want us to share that accomplishment.”
“You know what I think?”
“What?” Curiosity filled my voice.
“We won’t play these games together when you beat the game with Maddox. The only reason we did in the first place was because it was left unfinished. You’re going to change our past.”
I didn’t know what to say to that. Was I supposed to be angry?
“It would mean more to beat the game with my brother than it would with you.”
There, I said it out loud.
“Ten-four. You sure you want to practice with me then if it doesn't even mean anything to you?”
“No, Rhett—”
“No, Molly. I know you need time, but you have to consider my feelings. The fact that you’re upset doesn’t give you an excuse to treat me like the dirt on your shoes like you sometimes do. I’m going to watch tv in the living room. You go do whatever you want.”
Rhett stormed off in the direction of the living room.
“So much for doing what I wanted to do,” I hollered at his retreating back.
He didn’t say anything in return. The television clicked on and the sound filled the quiet, tense air. I stomped to Maddox’s room and started playing the game. It was on him if he didn’t want to play with me.
About an hour in, I realized how boring it was to play by yourself and was regretting my meltdown more and more. With the guilt eating at me, I tip-toed to the living room. I stealthily peeked around the corner and saw Rhett passed out on the couch. Some television show was flickering on the screen.
Light snores escaped Rhett’s mouth and it was the cutest thing. I pulled out my phone and recorded him so I would always have it. When I was satisfied with the length of the video, I curled into Rhett on the couch. He stirred and I apologized.
“It’s okay, Molly. Can you just relax with me for a bit?”
“Relaxing sounds nice.”
Rhett cuddled into the crook of my neck. His breath tickled the sensitive skin and it was hard not to giggle. Soon after, I drifted off to Rhett’s snores. I loved the sound and I loved him.
He was exactly what I needed.
~*~
The rustling of plastic awoke me. Mom and Dad were loudly placing their bags down like they were warning us that they’d returned home. It didn’t work for Rhett though. He was still knocked out.
Mom entered the living room and rounded the couch to see what we were doing. I placed a finger to my lips. Rhett looked so peaceful and I didn’t want her to wake him. She nodded in understanding and went in the direction of her room. Dad followed with the bags. He had a solemn look on his face as he went.
I stayed in that position for a good thirty more minutes before Rhett started to wake up. I wished I could’ve fallen back asleep, but it evaded me.
“How long was I out?”
“Judging by how dark it is outside, I would say it’s been a while. I fell asleep too, so I’m not certain.”
Our stomachs growled at the same time and we both blushed before bursting into fits of laughter.
“We haven’t eaten since this morning, have we?”
“Kind of hard to eat when you’re sleeping,” I stated sarcastically. “At least I haven’t accomplished that feat.”
“We have those leftovers we can eat. How about it?”
“Sounds perfect.”
Rhett rose off me and disappeared into the kitchen. I swiftly followed. He pulled the country fried steak out of the fridge and put it on a plate so he could heat it up in the microwave. Next, he nuked the gravy. Mom and Dad emerged from their room at the aroma.
“Good thing I cooked a lot last night. There’s enough for everyone.” Rhett grinned.
Mom pushed Rhett aside and took over making the plates. “You do too much, Rhett. I feel like I need to start paying you.”
“That’s completely unnecessary. Everyone deserves a good meal to bring them up when they’re down.”
“Still…” Mom hesitated as she passed out the plates. “I don’t give you as much credit as you deserve. You’re welcome to stay here as long as you like. Death definitely brings out the worst in others and if you can get through that in life, then you’ll be just fine.”
Was that a reference to us or was she just talking in general?
“Um… that’s true.” Rhett obviously didn’t know how to take it either and I was glad I wasn’t the only one.
Mom stared at Rhett for a few more moments before placing his plate down in front of him. That was too weird.
“Mom, are you okay?”
“Not right now, but some day I will be. I just can’t believe he’s gone. I keep waiting for him to come running out of his room for whatever he needed.” Mom sighed. “He was supposed to do great things. He was so smart and bright and he could’ve gone to a good school to get a good degree. He could’ve even developed video games. That was what his real dream was.”
“I always wanted a sporty boy who loved football and to get dirty, but Maddox changed that with one look,” Dad stated with a downcast look. “He was my boy and nothing was going to change that. Nothing will change that.”
I didn’t say anything. I couldn’t. I was too bent out of shape and vulnerable. Maddox being permanently gone was enough. We didn’t have to keep talking about it and bringing up memories. The happy memories were all tainted with sorrow now and it was hard to think back to them. At least it was for me at this moment.
“Aren’t you going to eat?” Rhett asked.
My stomach was rumbling, but my cotton mouth prevented me from taking the initial bite. The hand holding my fork was clenched so hard it had turned white. I loosened my grip and used the fork to push my food around the plate.
“It’s not going to jump into your mouth of its own accord,” Dad mocked.
I looked at him, but had no comeback. I wasn't sure why I suddenly didn’t want to eat. I was hungry, but the thought of food made me nauseous. How did that happen?
“Why don’t you take a few sips of water and then try taking a bite?” Rhett suggested.
I looked at him for half a minute, before taking a sip of water. It helpe
d a little and I was actually able to get down a bite. That was the only one I could muster and excused myself from the table.
Rhett didn’t follow me and I was thankful for it. I ran the hot water in my shower, climbed in, and cried until I had no tears left within me.
When I got out, I pulled out my phone. I played the video of Rhett snoring and it managed to brighten me up a smidgen. It was one of my favorite memories of us together.
Chapter Seventeen
A few weeks passed and I revisited the day of the accident at least twice a week. Maddox and I were so close to our accomplishment that I was certain it was going to happen soon. I just wasn’t positive about what the next step after that would be.
Rhett still wasn’t supportive of my actions, but he bit his tongue about it. Nothing he said was going to stop me anyway. I loved those extra moments with Maddox.
I was going back again today and Rhett was going home since his parents were in town. Once he was gone, I sat on my bed and focused. I was getting better with accuracy and skipped back to when I was in the kitchen grabbing the same box of cereal as always.
Maddox would hand me the controller when I returned and we would get lost in the world of fighting zombies. We made it halfway through the game and it was just past lunch time.
“You’ve so been practicing. There’s no way you just all of a sudden got this good,” Maddox complained.
It had gotten harder to explain my sudden increase in skill, so I went along with it. “You caught me. Extra time in is the only way I can catch up to you. You’re such a beast at these things.”
“I know I am incredible, huh? I want to create games one day. Maybe we can design one together.” Maddox’s smile was heart-wrenching.
“Maybe,” I replied with a slight flinch.
Maddox was getting ready to restart the game so he missed it. I needed to keep a hold on my emotions and fought that little voice in the back of my mind every second. It was still yelling at me to stop Maddox from going to the store.
“Stop daydreaming. You’re going to die,” Maddox complained and I refocused on our task.
He’d been right. My life force was drained drastically and I had to use a health pack. “Sorry, dude. Spaced there for a minute.”
“You’ve been doing that a lot today. Something on your mind?”
“How do you talk and play at the same time? I’m not that gifted yet, so let’s do one thing at a time.”
“Okay,” he responded and that was that.
A few more hours later and we watched the credits roll on the screen.
Maddox let out a long whistle. “Good thing you’ve been practicing otherwise we wouldn’t have finished it. I can’t believe we actually did it. I never thought I’d see the day.”
“It’s crazy, huh? Feels like a weight has been lifted off my shoulder though.”
Maddox laughed. “Yeah it feels pretty awesome. Thanks Molly. You’re the best sister.”
There went another tug on my heart. “You’re a pretty amazing little brother too.”
“So, you want to talk about what’s bothering you now?” Maddox pressed.
“You’re too smart for your own good.”
“As I said before, I’m awesome, but don’t change the subject.”
There went the shouting in the back of my mind again. Thankfully, I was saved by Dad entering.
“You guys having fun?” Dad asked.
“Yeah, Dad. We just beat the game. Can you believe it?”
“That’s pretty incredible. You mind running to the store with me then, squirt?” Dad asked Maddox.
“Molly had something she needed to talk to me about, so maybe another time,” Maddox stated.
“Why don’t you go with Dad so he doesn’t have to go alone?” I suggested. “We can talk about it when you get back.”
“Okay, as long as you don’t try to keep changing the subject when I get back,” Maddox bargained.
“Deal.” I smiled meekly at him.
He reached for me and gave me a tight hug. In all the scenarios that I saw play out, this was the first time Maddox instigated the embrace. It made my heart soar, which was something I hadn’t enjoyed in a while. I’d almost forgotten what it was like.
“I love you, sis.” Maddox’s arms squeezed tighter.
“I love you too,” I whispered and released him.
He and Dad waved goodbye and I sat back on his bed. No matter how many times I reenacted it, it was still just as hard to let Maddox leave with Dad. I stared at the door for a little longer and savored the lingering smell of Maddox before I flashed back to my time.
As usual, I got the timing off and Rhett was already sleeping in my bed. I’d assumed he was going to sleep at his own house since his parents were in town. I stood over him and shook him awake.
Rhett groaned and tossed and turned. “What?” he muttered.
“I did it. I went back and Maddox and I finally beat the game together in one sitting.”
Rhett’s eyes peeked open wider. “That’s cool, but I didn’t realize you hadn’t before. I was under the impression that you beat it with him already.”
“No, I had to practice with you, remember?”
He rubbed his face. “We’ve never played any games together. In the time since the accident, you haven’t felt up to it. You weren’t ready to share the games with me. It was something only you and Maddox could do.”
“But, we even had a fight about it.”
“When? You must’ve changed something, Molly. I have no clue what you’re talking about. Now let me go back to sleep. We can address this issue again in the morning.”
With that, he rolled back over.
I can’t believe we hadn’t played together.
Like I usually did when I was starting to feel down, I pulled my phone out to watch the video of Rhett snoring. I flipped through the pictures but couldn’t find it. It took a few minutes until I came to the conclusion that that video didn’t exist anymore. We never played video games together, so we never had the fight about it. One of my favorite memories of Rhett didn’t even exist in this timeline.
I squeezed into bed next to Rhett and he didn’t even stir. I glared at the ceiling, anxious about what else I’d changed. Sleep escaped me until the sun was already rising.
~*~
Rhett woke me up when it felt like I’d just fallen asleep. I swatted him away and rolled to my other side.
“Get up sleepy head. You can’t sleep all day.”
“What time is it?” I grumbled.
“It’s noon and I’ve made us sandwiches. I’m proud of you for yesterday.”
My eyes opened at that. “What did I do?”
“You can’t be serious. You don’t remember?” He sounded disappointed.
“Um, no…”
He paused and I had a feeling he was searching my thoughts. “You changed things and don’t even remember.”
“Did we have our first time?” I asked. That had to be what he was referring to.
“What? No. Neither of us were ready for that step.”
“On a previous timeline, I’d skipped right through it. Twice.”
His eyes searched my face, but I knew he was going into my mind again. “That’s crazy. You really did change a lot.”
“All from beating a game? What did I do yesterday to make you so proud?”
“You actually got out the house and went to the mall with Autumn. After that, you were in high spirits and we got dinner with my parents while they were in town.”
“I met your parents?” I balked.
“Yeah and they loved you.”
“They did?”
“I wouldn’t lie about that, would I?”
“Can I go back to sleep and pretend this talk was just a dream?”
“No way. You have to face what you altered. You’re going to one way or another, so why not now? Let’s eat the sandwiches and go from there. Deal?”
That word made me think back to Maddox
. Deal. That was one promise I wasn’t able to keep.
Rhett handed me a peanut butter and jelly sandwich that I devoured. He was still eating, but I was too anxious about what’d happened.
“So, I’ve been thinking—”
Rhett cut me off with a chuckle. “That’s never a good thing.”
My eyes narrowed. “Haha. Anyway, how was I there? Usually if I skip over a period of time, I’m not present in it.”
“I’m not sure. Maybe it’s because you already went through it once? It’s all complicated when you start messing with the webs of time. One little trigger can alter someone’s life. For the better or worse. I’m sure I warned you against going back to visit Maddox. Messing with time can’t be good.”
“You did warn me, but we both know how stubborn I am.” I put my hands on my cheeks. “Let’s go to the kitchen. I’m dying for a glass of milk.”
Rhett pulled me off the bed and kept his hand in mine as we walked.
“Hey, sweetie.” Mom beamed at us when we entered the kitchen. She was cleaning dishes and Dad was drying them.
My face screwed up in confusion. “Are you okay?”
She put down the soapy plate she was working on. “Yeah? Why wouldn’t I be?”
“Because your son died,” I snarked.
I didn’t mean to act like that, but this was all too confusing. She was supposed to be crying and hiding in her room.
“It’s been three months, Molly. I’m still upset about it, but I can go through the day with a smile now. What’s gotten into you?”
My breath caught in my throat.
Three months? I skipped almost two months?
My knees trembled, but held my weight.
How could that happen?
“Molly? Maybe you should take a seat. You’re looking very pale.” Dad’s brow creased with worry.
Rhett’s arms went around me, but I pushed them off.
“I need some fresh air.” I darted outside and slammed the door behind me.
Rhett was quick to open it back up and follow me out. “Molly, it’s going to be okay. I can walk you through what you missed.”
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