by Jim Stovall
“Somehow, some way, I would like to be able to help deprived young people live a good life. I don’t really mean poor young people. I mean young people who have not learned the power and the passion and the values they can have that will make their lives worth living. Somehow I am going to do for other young people what my Uncle Red is doing for me.”
Miss Hastings clapped her hands and replied enthusiastically, “Jason, that’s exciting. I can’t think of anything better you or anyone else could do with their life.”
Jason looked toward me and asked, “Well, does that sound okay to you?”
I smiled and replied, “Jason, after forty years of working with Miss Hastings, I have learned one principle of survival. That is simply to always agree with her. And I do, indeed, agree with her. You have established a most worthwhile dream and goal for your life. Just be sure to remember both of your great-uncle’s friends whose stories he shared with you, and keep your dream alive as long as you stay alive.”
Miss Hastings walked Jason to the elevator, leaving me alone at my desk. I thought about my dreams and how they were still alive in my eightieth year, although I did vow at that moment to make sure all of my dreams stayed alive and continued to grow.
ELEVEN
THE GIFT OF GIVING
The only way you can truly get
more out of life for yourself
is to give part of yourself away.
I was amazed at the progress young Jason Stevens was making as we traveled through our yearlong lesson in life together. He still had a long way to go, but there was definitely a light appearing at the end of the proverbial tunnel.
As we sat at the conference table to begin our ninth month of this journey together, I noticed an amazing change in Jason’s countenance, attitude, and demeanor. I felt that he was actually looking forward to whatever Red Stevens had in store for him this month. I knew that I was.
Miss Hastings pressed the appropriate button on the remote control, and Red Stevens appeared once again on the video screen.
“Jason, I want to congratulate you on passing your test as a dreamer. Don’t ever think that you have this skill mastered. Your ability to dream and turn those dreams into reality will grow as long as you grow as a person.
“This month, I want you to learn about the gift of giving. This is another one of those paradoxical principles like we talked about several months ago. Conventional wisdom would say that the less you give, the more you have. The converse is true. The more you give, the more you have. Abundance creates the ability to give; giving creates more abundance. I don’t mean this simply in financial terms. This principle is true in every area of your life.
“It is important to be a giver and a receiver. Jason, financially, I have given you everything that you have in this world. But, I violated the principle involved in the gift of giving. I gave you money and things out of a sense of obligation, not a true spirit of giving. You received those things with an attitude of entitlement and privilege instead of gratitude. Our attitudes have robbed us both of the joy involved in the gift of giving.
“It is important when you give something to someone that it be given with the right spirit, not out of a sense of obligation. I learned to give to people my whole life. I cannot imagine being deprived of the privilege of giving things and part of myself to other people.
“One of the key principles in giving, however, is that the gift must be yours to give—either something you earned or created or maybe, simply, part of yourself.
“This month, I want you to experience the gift of giving, but if you simply give away the money that I gave you or the things it will buy, we will have once again violated the principle. Therefore, every day for the next thirty days, I want you to give something to someone else that is a gift from you.”
“I don’t have anything,” Jason mumbled.
Red’s voice interrupted him. “Now, I know you’re probably trying to figure out what in the world you have to give that really came from you. Discovering the things that you already have to give to others will unlock the gift of giving and let you enter into a joyous realm you have never known before. If you are to continue along the path to receiving the ultimate gift I have left you in my will, at the end of this month you will return and report to Mr. Hamilton a gift that you have given each day of this month. As always, I wish you well.”
“How in the world am I going to come up with something to give away every day that didn’t come from my Uncle Red?” Jason exploded as the video ended. “Everything I have came from him.”
I thought for a minute and then replied, “I knew Red Stevens for more than half a century. He was a tough man but a fair man. He would never demand anything of you that you didn’t have the capacity to accomplish.”
As Jason slowly walked out of the conference room, I thought about how far he had come, and I hoped the journey would not end at that point.
Throughout that month, I tried to think of things that someone who had been given all his worldly possessions could give away that could actually be called his own. I will admit to having a struggle coming up with a handful of them, and I hoped Jason was doing well on his own. I knew my sense of duty and loyalty to my oldest and dearest friend would oblige me to judge the process fairly.
When Jason returned on the last day of the month, he and Miss Hastings sat across my desk from me. After we had exchanged brief greetings, Jason said, “Look, I want you to know that I did my best, and I’m not sure all of my gifts will fit into whatever Uncle Red had in mind. This wasn’t easy.”
I smiled and replied, “No lesson worth learning is ever easy.”
Jason unfolded a piece of paper and began his report. “It was really tough to come up with thirty things I could give to someone that I didn’t get from my great-uncle. But here goes. “On the first day, I stopped at a shopping center and found a parking space on the first row. As I was getting out of my car, I noticed an elderly couple looking for a space. I backed out and allowed them to park in my space, and I parked in the back of the lot.”
Jason looked at me for approval. I simply nodded and said, “Go on.”
“On the second day, I got caught downtown in a thunderstorm. I shared my umbrella with a young lady who didn’t have one. On the third day, I went to the hospital and donated a pint of blood. On day four, I called a man in my neighborhood who had told me he needed to buy new tires to tell him there was a really good sale going on across town. On day five, I helped an elderly woman carry her packages to her car. On day six, I agreed to watch a neighbor’s children for her while she went out with some friends. On day seven, I went to the Center for the Blind and read articles to visually impaired students. On day eight, I served lunch at the soup kitchen, and on day nine I wrote a note and sent a poem to a friend.
“On day ten, I agreed to take my neighbor’s kids to school. On day eleven, I helped box and move donated items for the Salvation Army. On days twelve and thirteen, I let some visiting foreign exchange students stay in my home. On day fourteen, I helped a local Scout troop with their weekly meeting. On day fifteen, I found a man with a dead battery and jump-started his car. On day sixteen, I wrote letters for several people who were in the hospital. On day seventeen, I went to the local animal shelter and walked several of their dogs in the park. On day eighteen, I gave the frequent flyer miles I had earned with an airline to a high school band group planning a trip to a parade in California. Day nineteen, I worked with a local service organization and delivered meals to disabled and elderly people.
“Days twenty, twenty-one, twenty-two, and twenty-three, I took a group of inner-city kids who had never been camping and fishing on a trip with the Scout troop. I had never been camping or fishing either. On day twenty-four, I helped a local church with their rummage sale. Days twenty-five and twenty-six, I worked with a crew on a Habitat for Humanity house. Day twenty-seven, I let a local charity group use my home for a reception. Day twenty-eight, I helped one of my neighbors rake the
leaves out of his yard. Day twenty-nine, believe it or not, I helped to bake cookies for the elementary school’s bake sale.”
Jason stopped his report at that point. I couldn’t imagine he had gone through twenty-nine days of giving only to fail on the thirtieth day. Finally, feeling alarmed, I asked, “And what about day thirty, Jason?”
Jason laughed and said, “Today is day thirty, and I would like both you and Miss Hastings to have some of my homemade cookies from the bake sale.”
Jason reached into a bag I had not noticed at his feet and gave us each some of the cookies.
I felt a sense of relief that Jason had completed his task for the month. I took a bite of one of his cookies and responded, “Not too bad, but I’m glad that your dream does not involve a lot of baking.”
We all laughed, and Jason talked well into the afternoon about all the people he had met and given part of himself to throughout the month. I was reminded of how a small gift when it is given can be a magnificent gift as it is received.
TWELVE
THE GIFT OF GRATITUDE
In those times when we yearn
to have more in our lives,
we should dwell on the things
we already have. In doing so,
we will often find that our lives
are already full to overflowing.
As Jason arrived for our tenth monthly meeting together, I was still marveling at how he had found enough gifts within himself to give away something every day of the previous month. I thought of all the lessons we had learned, and I was reminded of the fact that we just had a few months to go to complete Red Stevens’ ultimate gift to Jason.
I had the feeling that is described by baseball pitchers who are close to completing a no-hit game: You realize that one minor mistake at any point can ruin the entire effort. As Jason completed each monthly task, I think we both felt a sense of accomplishment but, at the same time, a realization that we had more to lose than ever before.
As Miss Hastings, Jason, and I gathered in the conference room, I think we were all anxious to find out what Red Stevens had in store for us. Miss Hastings started the video, and the familiar image of Red Stevens appeared before us.
“Greetings to you all, and my congratulations to Jason, and thanks to Mr. Hamilton and Miss Hastings.”
Red Stevens then winked his right eye, which was a gesture I had enjoyed for over five decades. That wink could speak a myriad of emotions, and I never thought I would see it again after attending his funeral.
“When you prepare your will and a video like this, you automatically have to think about your entire life,” he continued. “I have been so many places and experienced so many things, it is hard to remember that I have only lived one lifetime.
“I remember as a young man, being so poor that I had to do day labor for food to eat, and had to sleep along the side of the road. I also remember being in the company of kings and presidents and knowing all of the material things this life has to offer. As I look back, I am thankful for it all.
“During what, at the time, I considered to be some of my worst experiences, I gained my fondest memories.”
Red paused, collected his thoughts, and pressed on. “Jason, this month, you are going to learn a lesson that encompasses something that has been totally lacking in your life. That is gratitude.
“I have always found it ironic that the people in this world who have the most to be thankful for are often the least thankful, and somehow the people who have virtually nothing, many times live lives full of gratitude.
“While still in my youth, shortly after going out on my own to conquer the world, I met an elderly gentleman who today would be described as homeless. Back then, there were a lot of people who rode the rails, traveling throughout the country doing just a little bit of work here and there in order to get by. It was during the Depression, and some of these so-called hobos or tramps were well educated and had lives full of rich experiences.
“Josh and I traveled together for almost a year. He seemed very old at that time, but since I was still in my teens, I may have had a faulty perspective. He is one of the only people I ever met of whom I could honestly say, ‘He never had a bad day.’ Or if he did, there was certainly no outward sign of it. Traveling about as we did, we often found ourselves wet, cold, and hungry. But Josh never had anything but the best to say to everyone we met.
“Finally, when I decided to settle down in Texas and seek my fortune there, Josh and I parted company. Settling down was simply not a priority in his life. When we parted, I asked him why he was always in such good spirits. He told me that one of the great lessons his mother had left him was the legacy of the Golden List.
“He explained to me that every morning before he got up, he would lie in bed—or wherever he had been sleeping—and visualize a golden tablet on which was written ten things in his life he was especially thankful for. He told me that his mother had done that all the days of her life, and that he had never missed a day since she shared the Golden List with him.
“Well, as I stand here today, I am proud to say I haven’t missed a day since Josh shared the process with me almost sixty years ago. Some days, I am thankful for the most trivial things, and other days I feel a deep sense of gratitude for my life and everything surrounding me.”
Red cleared his throat, took a sip of water, gathered himself, and continued. “Jason, today, I am passing the legacy of the Golden List on to you. I know that it has survived well over one hundred years simply being passed from Josh’s mother through Josh to me, and now to you. I don’t know how Josh’s mother discovered the process, so its origins may go back much further than I know.
“In any event, I am passing it on to you, and if you will be diligent in the beginning, before long it will simply become a natural part of your life, like breathing.
“This month, I want you to think about all of the things you have to be thankful for. And when you return at the end of the month, you are to share your version of the Golden List with Mr. Hamilton. I hope you will continue the process for the rest of your life, and someday you will have the privilege—as I now have—of sharing the legacy again.”
Red’s image faded away, leaving the screen blank.
The next morning, as is my usual habit, I woke up precisely at 5:00 a.m. I have done this for years without the aid of an alarm clock. I lay there thinking about the Golden List that Red had shared with Jason, and I began to construct my own list in my mind before I got out of bed.
As an eighty-year-old, it takes me more time to get out of bed than it used to, so I knew from that point on, I would have plenty of time each day for Red Stevens’ exercise in gratitude.
As the end of the month approached, my thoughts were drawn to Jason Stevens. I hoped he was progressing with the Golden List each day as I was. I was concerned because he had spent his whole life taking everything for granted.
Jason arrived a bit early on the last day of the month, and he had a gleam in his eye and a spring in his step. My concerns began to fade just a bit. Jason and I shook hands, and he greeted Miss Hastings. I sat behind my desk, and Jason helped Miss Hastings with her chair and then dropped into the vacant one beside her.
“Well, you seem to be in a good mood today, Jason,” I observed.
He laughed aloud and responded, “I have more reasons than I ever imagined to be in a good mood.”
Then he began to share his Golden List.
“Each day this month, I have been thinking about things I am grateful for. I never would have imagined that there are so many.
“First, I am thankful for my health. I have always had my health, and over the last ten months, through the directives of Uncle Red’s will, I have met several people who have physical problems. So I will always be grateful for my good health.
“Second, I am thankful for my youth. I have learned that I have missed many of the important things in life thus far; however, I feel that youth can overcome any obstacle.
“Third, I am thankful for my home. It’s a wonderful home, made possible through my Uncle Red’s generosity. I never really appreciated it as I should, but through this ultimate gift from the will, I have been able to share my home with other people and have come to appreciate it myself.
“Fourth, I am thankful for my friends.” He looked toward Miss Hastings and me, then continued. “Including both of you, Brian, Gus Caldwell, the boys at the Red Stevens Home, and—in a special way that is hard to explain—my Uncle Red.
“Fifth, I am thankful for my education. Although I did not apply myself well during college, it did give me the tools I need to go out and make education and learning a real part of my life.
“Sixth, I am thankful for all of the places I have been able to travel to and experience throughout the years thanks to my Uncle Red.
“Seventh, I am thankful for my car. It is fun as well as dependable and reliable. I learned from my friend Brian that everyone isn’t as lucky as I am.
“Eighth, I am thankful for my family. Although I have not always appreciated them throughout the years, I have learned enough about families to know that, in the future, I can get along better with the family I have and at the same time create family relationships with new people.
“Number nine, I am grateful for the money that my Uncle Red has made possible over the years. But even more than that, I am grateful for the fact that, through my Uncle Red’s efforts, I have learned the value and use of money. I look forward to learning more about the subject in the future and handling the money I have more wisely.
“And finally, number ten, I am thankful for each of the steps leading up to the ultimate gift. I am thankful to my Uncle Red for thinking of me as he went to the trouble of putting it together, and I am grateful to both of you for carrying out his wishes.”
Miss Hastings broke in and said, “Jason, that is a marvelous list. I think you have done very well in understanding the Golden List and the gift of gratitude.”