‘There’s no need to be embarrassed about admitting it, Ellie. I’ve already made it clear how much I want you, there’s nothing wrong with two people having such intense chemistry and desiring each other.’
‘There is when there’s a permanent obstacle,’ I muttered, full of frustration. How the hell had I ended up in the middle of nowhere with a guy that refused to reciprocate the sexual desire I had for him? ‘Inappropriate,’ I groaned as he pressed up behind me, wrapped his arms around me and nosed through my hair.
‘I’m sorry. I know how hard I’m finding this, I didn’t mean to make you feel the same.’
‘I know,’ I nodded, as I tried to regulate my breathing. ‘But this sort of thing is what we need to avoid.’ I struggled to get out of his hold, but he was too powerful for me. Every second of his body pressed against mine melted my resolve. You can’t go there, Ellie, I reminded myself, not while he refuses to tell you where he goes and why he thinks it will make you see him differently.
‘I should never have agreed to this booking,’ he sighed as he kissed the side of my head and released me.
‘You agreed it?’ I asked.
‘Yes. I vet all the rentals, but we normally close over the Christmas break. If I hadn’t agreed to those extra two weeks for you, you’d already be home and we wouldn’t be in this situation.’
‘Why did you agree then?’ I asked as I snatched the matches from him and moved away.
‘I don’t know,’ he sighed. ‘I guess I realised that a single woman looking to be alone over Christmas was obviously running away from something. I felt sorry for you and felt an immediate affinity with you as well, and I think I …’ he sighed and shoved a hand through his hair.
‘You were lonely and thought it would be nice to have some company?’
‘Yes,’ he confirmed and grabbed his torch and disappeared towards his bathroom.
‘Shit,’ I muttered to myself. ‘This has the potential for disaster written all over it.’ I lit just enough of the candles, so we had enough light to see if I prepared some food later, then sat back on the sofa, rapidly twitching my foot as I tried to put all sexual thoughts out of my mind.
‘It’s still pretty dark in here,’ he observed as he returned.
‘We don’t know when the power will be back, I daren’t use all the candles just in case we have a few nights to get through.’
We just looked at each other through the dim glow of the fire and candles and it was obvious that this was going to be as tough for him as it was for me.
Day Twenty Two
Ellie
I woke up and grimaced to find myself wrapped in Dan’s arms again. He’d insisted that we could share his bed and sleep at opposite sides and that he wouldn’t touch me. It had taken me ages to get to sleep. I’d tried desperately not to let him hear how out of control my breathing was to know that he was lying so close to me, close enough to reach out and touch, knowing he probably wouldn’t be able to maintain that self-control. From the way he’d kept shifting uncomfortably next to me and his laboured breathing, he’d been feeling exactly the same. I’d fallen asleep clinging to the edge of the mattress, but somehow I was now in the middle of it, my face buried in his firm chest and his strong arms enveloping me. My heart rate immediately spiked.
‘Good morning, Miss Baxter,’ he murmured against the top of my head. I smiled, it was his happy tone.
‘Morning. How did this happen?’
‘No idea. Are you complaining?’
‘Yes,’ I whimpered. I heard him sigh, then he loosened his grip and I quickly scooted away from him. Don’t look in his eyes, Ellie, I warned myself, that’s how he’s fucked over a thousand women, he’s some kind of sexual hypnotist. I was so close to running my hands over his body and trying to force him to take me. The memory of his fingers inside me, his tongue working so expertly on me was just so fresh.
‘I’ll go and get showered then and leave you to have a lie in while I get more logs sorted.’
‘Ok,’ I confirmed. I snuck a peak of him shuffling down the bed towards to the ladder, and while my body sparked to see his broad muscular shoulders and large biceps with his deep bronzed skin, I ignored it and frowned as I noticed a nasty jagged scar on his lower back. I followed it with my eyes to see it curled around his right hip, disappearing into the waistband of the boxers he was still wearing. How had I not seen that before? I realised it was because I’d not seen him virtually naked from behind. I’d only seen his chest. I noticed other small scars all over the back of his right shoulder and down the back of his arm. I quickly shut my eyes as he turned to climb down the ladder.
‘Too late, saw you looking,’ he chuckled.
‘Go and put some clothes on, please,’ I moaned as I buried my mortified face in the pillow.
‘You look good in my bed,’ he called back as I heard him walking downstairs. I feel good in it, I thought, exceedingly good, especially when you’re in it too. I rolled over to his side of the mattress and grinned as I hauled the sheet up to my face and took a deep breath of his scent. I must have fallen back asleep as he went out to chop more logs for the wood burner and I woke with a start as I heard the front door close and him walking through on the creaky floorboards. I stretched out as I listened to the shower start downstairs and let out a frustrated sigh to think of him naked, wet and soaped up just below me. The sooner they got the power back on and I could put some distance between us the better. I heard Dan make a noise and noticed a curl of steam drifting past my face and stuck my head over the edge of the mattress to see where it was coming from. I had to clamp my hand over my mouth to stop a groan of pleasure from escaping. There was a reasonably large gap in the floorboards, affording me a clear view of Dan down below me, and the sight didn’t disappoint. I’d imagined that seeing him completely naked would be consolation enough for not getting to sleep with him, but I hadn’t expected to get such a clear visual of him naked, wet and … masturbating. My body ignited the second I saw him gripping and squeezing his large shaft, his muscular thighs spread wide as he leaned back on the tiled wall. His head was tipped back, eyes shut as his hand moved with urgency. His cock was simply breath taking, thick, long and solid. He was bigger than Matt or Zac, as I’d suspected, but it was even better in the flesh. No way should a specimen like that have been inactive for three whole years. Well, obviously not inactive in terms of him bringing himself off. I’d no idea watching a man doing that could feel so erotic, it never had with Zac.
I was torn between watching him to completion, or looking after my suddenly throbbing clit. I chose the former, I could masturbate anytime, how many more chances would I have to see magnificent Dan in all his glory? I shivered as I heard him groan and watched his hand squeeze tighter as his strokes began to speed up, while his other hand reached down to palm his balls. Unlike Zac who went for the smooth look, Dan was natural, his short dark hair taking away nothing from his size. In fact, it would be seriously scary if he waxed, it would look too big. Much as I wanted to keep my eyes on the beast he was grappling, I had to look at that scar I’d seen earlier. It ran down his hip and thigh and looked as if it had been a seriously nasty gash. I tried to imagine what could have happened for him to have sustained that, but was distracted again by another loud groan. His eyes were still closed, but his jaw had dropped as he started to pant. I watched as his body tensed up and his fist pumped faster and faster. I could have sworn I heard my name escape his lips as streams of come erupted from him, spurting out and mingling with the water that swirled down the drain. As he slowly finished himself off, he groaned again, then opened his eyes and looked straight up through the gap in the floorboards, locking eyes with my prying ones. I gasped and saw the hint of a lazy smile creep onto his face as I flung myself back into the bed, mortified to have been caught watching. Shit! How was I going to face him now? I wondered as I covered my face with my hands.
‘Hungry?’ he called. I could hear the amusement in his tone.
‘Yes,�
� I called back, wondering if he was talking about breakfast or sex. I’d be happy with either at this point, in fact fuck breakfast, I was hungry for him. I didn’t even need to touch myself to know how slick I was feeling. I needed a shower, desperately, preferably a cold one without him spying on me from up here.
‘I’m good at bacon and egg sandwiches.’
‘Sounds great.’
‘You don’t fancy sausage?’ he replied, his tone making it obvious he was teasing me.
‘No thanks,’ I called.
‘I thought you were partial to a nice sausage.’
‘Depends who’s offering.’
‘What if it were me? Now you know what I have to offer, you don’t fancy it?’
‘Dan! Please behave,’ I sighed feeling my cheeks flame.
‘So are you coming down, or would you like it in bed?’
‘What?’ I uttered.
‘Your bacon and egg sandwich,’ he laughed.
‘I guess I’ll come down. Do you mind if I have a shower while you cook?’
‘No, and at least you’ll know you’re safe from my inquisitive gaze while I’m down here,’ he called back. I cringed and felt my cheeks burn even more. I couldn’t hide up here all day, I was actually really hungry. We’d been so busy playing Backgammon by candle light last night, we hadn’t really made a dent in the food we’d transported down from the house. I sat up as I smelled the delicious aroma of coffee brewing, and crawled to the end of the bed and climbed down the ladder, quickly pulling down my crumpled t-shirt to try and hide my backside, still clad in my black lace knickers. I caught Dan’s eye as he winked at me and I felt my cheeks flame. It was bad enough facing him after knowing he’d seen me watching him, but he was standing at the kitchen worktop in just his towel, his dark hair still wet and shoved back off his forehead. I could feel the air between us crackling and rushed past to the bathroom before I had a chance to rip his towel off and take him in my mouth and suck him to completion again as I swallowed him down. Damn it, I needed Brooke. I needed her to tell me that I had to stay away from him, in eight days I’d be leaving and never seeing him again. I’d soon be able to try and start forgetting about him when I was going out in London and meeting other guys. I washed my hair under the warm water and knew Brooke would let me down even if I could contact her. She’d tell me to fuck him, get him out of my system so I wouldn’t always wonder “What if?” when I got home. I squeeze dried my hair and dressed in my black skinny jeans and a boat neck jade jumper and padded out barefoot to the smell and sound of the bacon sizzling.
‘Can I do anything?’ I asked as I looked at his scar again while he stood at the hob.
‘No, I can handle it, thank you,’ he replied. I couldn’t help myself and reached out with my index finger and traced the scar on his back. I felt him tense and hiss through his teeth.
‘How did you get this?’
‘Car accident.’
‘Were you badly hurt?’
‘I got off lightly. Any sauce on your bread?’ His voice had turned serious, indicating that this wasn’t a topic he wanted to discuss.
‘No thank you, just some butter would be great.’
‘Were you alone?’ I couldn’t help myself asking.
‘You’ve had your quota of questions today, Ellie. Here’s your coffee. Go sit.’
‘Do you mind if we sit outside?’ I asked. He looked at me over his shoulder and frowned.
‘It’s still cold.’
‘You have blankets. It’s just so pretty, and if the snow’s melting I’d like to take it all in before it’s gone. I’ll be leaving soon and I don’t want to miss anything that will remind me of my trip.’
‘You really like it up here?’ He sounded surprised.
‘It’s beautiful and I actually really like the peace and quiet. I thought I’d miss all the buzz of London, but other than Brooke I don’t miss it as much as I thought I would.’ The statement even surprised me. He turned and handed me my sandwich and I made sure that I didn’t touch his fingers as I took the plate. I headed out onto the veranda and put my feet up on the wooden armchair, covering myself in one of the blankets. I sipped my coffee, burning my mouth as I gulped too fast when Dan strode past still only wearing his little towel. ‘Blanket?’ I offered holding the second one out for him.
‘No, I’m good,’ he replied as he casually placed an ankle up on his bare knee and I averted my eyes. ‘Now you’re embarrassed?’ he chuckled.
‘Like you weren’t standing in that exact position knowing I’d have a good view,’ I retorted as I took a bite of my sandwich and narrowed my eyes at him.
‘Maybe,’ he smirked. ‘I think you should return the favour tomorrow morning.’
‘Friends, remember,’ I objected.
‘You really think men and women can be friends?’
‘Yes, don’t you?’ I mumbled as I chewed.
‘No,’ he laughed. ‘Someone’s always thinking about sex, usually the guy. The longer you’re friends with a woman the more inevitable it becomes that sex will happen. Even if one of you, or both of you are spoken for, at some stage you’re both going to be single, or just drunk and curious.’
‘You make it sound like people have no control over their sexual desires.’
‘Not when it’s in their faces all the time, no.’
‘I disagree, look at us.’
‘Yes, look at us. We’ve kissed a number of times, been sexual with each other twice and now you’ve seen me masturbating twice.’
‘We haven’t been sexual with each other,’ I reminded him. ‘You’ve been sexual with me, you wouldn’t let me reciprocate.’
‘Can we just eat and enjoy the view. I’m getting hard again,’ he grumbled. I flicked a glance down at his towel. He wasn’t wrong, he was hard. I focussed on eating and watching the water, anything but looking at the tempting morsel sitting next to me.
‘The loch’s starting to thaw,’ I observed.
‘Yes. It’s not safe to walk across, but it’s still too frozen at the edges for me to try the boat.’
‘You’re missing your thing in town again?’
‘Yes,’ he replied quickly and stood up. ‘Do you need anything from the house? I’d like to go and spend the day working out.’
‘I could probably do with exercising too. Can I join you?’ The thought of seeing him all hot and sweaty on a treadmill or elliptical trainer heated me up instantly, but even without electricity to power them, the frown that appeared on his face told me he wasn’t overly enthused at the idea.
‘I’d prefer … I hope you don’t mind but …’ he stalled and ran a hand over his mouth.
‘You want to go alone?’ I looked up at him towering over me, his broad shoulders flexing as he cricked his neck.
‘Sorry, I’m just used to spending a lot of time alone.’
‘I’m cramping your style. I can go and spend the day up at the house.’
‘No, it’s too cold. I’ll stoke up the log burner and you can relax inside doing your writing or facetiming Brooke or whatever.’
‘No electricity or Wi-Fi,’ I reminded him.
‘Shit, of course. Can I get you some books from the library?’
‘I can go and get them, the snow isn’t so hard now, it’ll be easier to walk through.’
‘Ok, why don’t you go and do that while I get changed? I’d like to know you’ve made it back in one piece before I go.’
‘If you could go and get changed that would be great. It’s very distracting seeing you half naked in that little towel.’
‘Fully naked in a little towel,’ he replied with a cock of his eyebrow as he walked past and entered the boathouse. I twisted my head around to watch him walk towards the bathroom and gasped as he tugged the towel off and swaggered down, probably with the knowledge that I was watching again. He was evil.
I gulped down the rest of my coffee, finished my sandwich, grabbed my boots and his large jacket and made my way up to the house. Dan was right, the
house was really cold. I tried to remember which lights were on when the power went out and went around turning off the plugs and flipping down the switches. I turned off my iPad and iPhone to conserve power for if I needed them, packing them in a small bag along with a selection of books to read. When I checked my laptop I actually still had some hours of charge left in the battery, so I took that with me as well. It seemed I’d live out my fantasy of typing my novel in the boathouse after all. By the time I got back there, Dan was sitting outside with another coffee, dressed in some track pants, a t-shirt with an unzipped sweatshirt on top. He managed to look hot even dressed so simply like that.
‘Sorry I took so long.’
‘No problem, not like we’re in any rush. Will you be ok on your own?’
‘I’ll be fine. It’s no different to any other day. What will you do for lunch?’
‘I can make a sandwich and take it with me.’
‘I’ll do it for you and pack you up some of the cold cuts and sausages and bits we didn’t eat last night. Would you mind if I used your kitchen tonight to make dinner?’
‘No. What were you thinking?’
‘Turkey in a white wine sauce with mushrooms and those asparagus that need eating with some rice. Is that ok?’
‘Sounds great.’ He gave me one of his dazzling smiles and I blushed and headed in, dumping my bag and coat and preparing a covered platter with his lunch.
‘Ready when you want it,’ I called.
‘Now who’s flirting,’ he laughed as he stepped inside, ducking to get under the door.
‘I think you read sex into everything, Dan,’ I observed.
‘So do you, Miss Baxter,’ he winked. ‘This is all for me?’
‘You have a big appetite.’
‘I do, for many things.’
‘I think you ought to go before one of us does something we regret,’ I advised as I turned to wash my hands. I tensed up as I felt him behind me and he placed a hand on my hip.
‘Thank you for my lunch, you know where I am if there’s an emergency.’ I closed my eyes as he placed a delicate kiss on my hair. By the time I reopened them he was closing the front door and I was all alone. I sighed, I really needed Brooke right now. How was I supposed to keep my hands off him for another night, especially now I’d seen what I was missing in the flesh?
31 Days of Winter (31 Days #1) Page 33