“First time someone has gone down on you?”
“No.” I sassed back. I knew he thought I was innocent, but just because I wasn’t as experienced as him didn’t mean that I hadn’t experienced some things. “First time that it has made me, uh…”
“Orgasm?”
“Yeah.” I pulled the panties the rest of the way up and hopped off the bed. I fixed my hair and makeup in the mirror. It hadn’t gotten too ruffled, so I wouldn’t kill him. I saw him perched on the bed, fixing his own hair and smiling from ear to ear.
20
Grant
Following her down to the lobby was driving me crazy. I was pretty aroused from earlier, and looking at the back of her wasn’t helping. She peeked over at me, her face was gorgeous. The makeup highlighted her features, and having her hair pulled back drew attention to it. She was gorgeous. I hadn’t seen someone as naturally beautiful as her.
Her dress perfectly complimented my suit. We looked fantastic together. I’m sure we would turn all the heads. We might even take all the attention from the bride and groom. Hand in hand, we glided into the dimly lit room. Tables were softly lit by the centerpieces, and the shadows of the candles danced on the floor. The room was decorated with drapes that made it look like clouds were floating on the sides of the room. The windows showed the early evening sun warming up the ocean, getting ready to take a dip into the night. I hadn’t been to a place this beautiful in a while. Weddings were always so elegant, but this one had a lot of them beat. Even the times before when I had been to this hotel, it had never seemed this dapper.
Tonight was already a great night, and this scenery was making it perfect. We were going to dance. We had to. The band set up. We were there early. We should have stayed in our room for a little while longer. I kept thinking back to before and it drove me crazy. I wanted to go back upstairs and fling her on the bed. I wanted to show her all my learned skills. I wanted her to feel special.
She rubbed my thumb with hers, and it felt so sweet and gentle. April was perfect. We kept hands linked as we walked through the room, greeting everyone. I just kept thinking of before, how her legs relaxed and toes curled. I had felt her hands grabbing at the sheets and I couldn’t get the scene out of my head. It gave me butterflies. I loved pleasing women, that was why I was in this line of business. Pleasing April magnified that. I was proud. I felt like a million dollars. Even if she didn’t want to see me after this weekend, at least I would be one of her firsts, and therefore made permanent in her memories.
We saw the heads turn as we passed through the tables to ours. She smiled. It radiated. This weekend would do wonders for her confidence. “You look lovely.” I whispered in her ear.
She smiled. “You keep saying that.”
“It’s true.”
We got to our table and sat by her parents. I wanted to make a good impression, but I was still sidetracked by thoughts I had about us earlier. I held her hand as I spoke with her mom. Her fingers belonged in my hair, ruffling it up. I spoke about my hedge fund to her parents. It was all fairly boring business stuff, but I knew they would be impressed by it. I kept talking about the success of the business without being too proud. I had performed this dialogue enough times that I had it memorized. It rolled off my tongue as I thought about April in bed. I wanted her again. I wanted her now. I could imagine her body under the outline of her clothes. The image was burned into my mind. It spun in loops, driving me crazy.
When I had exhausted the business talk I thought I would have a moment to think. Her mom kept speaking. I could tell she was charmed by me, she kept asking me more and more about my life, trying to dissect my brain and pull all the information out.
“You are doing very well for yourself.” Her dad said, raising a glass to me.
“Thank you, sir.”
“Now, I bet you were raised by a great family, tell me about your parents.” Her mom said, taking a drink of her champagne.
“Well, they actually are in a different line of business.” I looked to April, wondering if I should be telling this much detail about my life. It made it more realistic, but I wasn’t ready to have my book opened. I got over that quick. I was here on work. I had to do my job. “They have significant interest in a casino in Vegas. That’s where we are from.”
“And what about your mother?”
I didn’t want to say they were divorced. That would ruin the magic of my allure. I decided it was for the best to talk about my parents in the most positive light, even if it was lying. “My mom helps him.”
In reality she wanted nothing to do with my dad. After he was having another kid, she would refuse to be in the same room with him. She thought it was gross. She shamed him every time they had to meet. I couldn’t say any of that. I had to paint a dazzling picket fence life.
“Which casino is it?” Her dad asked.
“Are you a card player?” I asked, trying to detour their questions. I didn’t want to give too much info away.
“Not at all. I dabble with friends, but I wouldn’t dare try professionally.”
“Enough.” Her mom said. She lightly slapped his thigh. “Which casino was it, Grant?”
“It’s called Oasis. It has an Egyptian theme. It’s sort of corny. My dad was inspired by Indiana Jones. It was fun to run around there when I was a kid.”
“I’m sure.” She finished her drink. “I have actually heard of this casino. Isn’t it a hotel as well?”
“Yes actually.”
“Did you have any siblings to run around with you?”
This whole while April was paying attention to me. I could tell she liked having them off her back. I was fine with the questions, but I could see how she was exhausted by them. “I have a few older brothers.”
“Are they in the casino business too?”
“Not quite. Actually my oldest brother just opened up a new hotel.”
“That’s exciting. Do you get to go for free?”
“I don’t know. I’ll have to ask.” I assumed that I would. I don’t think my brother would care too much for me visiting, though. Not when he was up to his ears with paperwork for the new building.
“Maybe you can take April on a little trip.” April flushed. Her mom kept talking. “Where is it at?”
“It’s in Seattle.”
“Wouldn’t you like that, honey? That would be fun.” Her mom finally addressed April. She was spacing off a bit, but turned her head quickly towards her mother.
“Yeah, that would be nice. I don’t want to barge, though.” She said. I could tell she was treating it as a real proposition. I wondered if I could actually convince her to go somewhere with me.
“It wouldn’t be barging at all. I’d love to have your company.” We made eye contact, locking our eyes for a while. I meant it. I genuinely did. I wanted to tour the world, holding her on a pedestal. She was gorgeous and smart. I couldn’t stop thinking about her when she left the room. When she was getting ready for tonight, I sat outside the bathroom, waiting to surprise her.
Her mom chimed back in, asking me more and more questions about my life. She was like a detective, trying to pin down every second of my life. April went back to spacing off as I answered the questions. I wondered what she was thinking about. Was she remembering earlier, holding onto the moment as much as I was?
Not much more time had passed before April’s mom began to talk to her dad. They talked about Vegas and the last time they went there. I started to tune them out, paying more attention to April. I could tell something was distracting her, and she looked a little bothered. I didn’t know what by. I squeezed her hand in mine, hoping it would let her know that it was going to be okay.
The room was beginning to fill with more people. It was getting harder and harder to hear April’s parents. I didn’t mind it. I liked having some time to think. I wondered if April wanted to go on the trip. Her hesitation could have been genuine too. It was hard to tell what she really wanted from me. I knew we had something, but I
didn’t know how long she would let the fling last.
She seemed totally uninterested in Tom now. She didn’t look at him once this whole time. I kept my eye on them, though. I waited for him to swoop in like a hawk, trying to take her as his prey. He seemed so conflicted about his relationship. I wasn’t about to let him make mine more complicated than it already was.
I wanted April to be happy, but I knew he was no good for her. I think she knew that, too. She had been cold to him this morning, and you could tell there was still some resentment to him. It wasn’t her fault. He shouldn’t have been a dick to her. If I weren’t here to wow everyone, I probably would have given him a piece of my mind. The closest I could come now is bragging about April and I’s pretend happy life. It was enough for me.
It started to give me actual thoughts about our future, too. I wanted to keep her around. I wanted to help her through her tough time. I wanted to show her that she was more important than she felt, that she could achieve much more. April needed to feel valuable, and even though she was becoming more confident, you could tell she was still embarrassed and disappointed in herself. I didn’t know if she got that from her parent’s high expectations, or from Tom’s good fortune but it didn’t matter to me. And it shouldn’t matter to her. This was her life, and they didn’t have to be involved if they were just bringing her down.
Her mom began to talk to me again about Vegas. She talked about how she missed the city. She asked me for all kinds of stories, wanting to know the craziest things that had happened. I kept my eye on April as I spoke, and April seemed invested. She laughed when the stories were funny and looked at me to show interest.
The music started up. I tried talking over it, but it proved to be difficult. As more and more people filtered in the room, the louder the music became and the more isolated I felt. Even just sitting here was making me feel antsy. Normally I was good with weddings and wedding parties, but I was becoming restless. I wanted to talk to April more. I wanted to figure out what was wrong, and I wanted to take her upstairs and escape all these people.
But that wasn’t going to happen. The party hadn’t even started yet. I sat back and talked more and more about Vegas. I hoped that it made April interested. I would love to have her over. I could take her all over the town. She was the only female who I was close to that didn’t have grey roots. I was smitten. She was very different. She had the potential to grow. She just needed someone to show her that. I would happily be that person.
21
April
I was pretty nervous. Lucky for me, Grant was doing all the talking. If I spoke, I knew that I would have a panic attack. I didn’t think I could handle this. It was a lot to go through, and adrenaline coursed through my veins. I could use a drink. Maybe five. Grant kept talking to my mom, keeping her tamed and away from asking me about life and work and death. The way Grant spoke was reassuring. I didn’t want him to be gone after this weekend. I knew we had so much more than we were accepting.
The chatter rose and I kept spacing out. I was still flustered from before. I had never had a guy that was so good at making me climax. I tried not to think about it too much. When I did, it just reminded me of his line of work. I didn’t want to think about how many women he had been with. I didn’t want to think about why he did what he did. I just wanted to think about him as a person, the hedge fund owner that was wowing my parents.
Tom began approaching our table. My pulse rose, my hands became clammy. I removed them from Grant’s intertwined fingers for the first time since we left the room. “Oh no.” I whispered. Grant looked at him approaching and let out a deep breath. He went back to speaking to my parents, making my mom laugh, and telling her about all the great adventures he had had in Vegas.
I wanted to put on an invisibility shield. I wanted Tom to just leave me alone. He didn’t seem to care or think so. He jogged over to our table and greeted everyone. “April, could I pull you aside for a second?”
“Fine.” I got up and pushed my chair back in. I leaned over to Grant. “I’ll only be a moment. Save me if I am gone for too long.”
“You’ll be fine. Take your time.” I wanted Grant to come with. He could be a body guard for my heart. Tom was just going to toy with me and disappoint me. He seemed to love doing that. I began picking at my fingers, walking behind Tom to a secluded part of the room where it was a bit quieter.
“What?”
“I just wanted to talk to you. I didn’t get to say that much this morning.” He flushed. I knew he knew that I didn’t want to be there, trapped with him in the corner of the room. I had no choice. It was his party. “So, you two seem pretty happy.”
“We are. You seem happy as well.”
“Do I?” This sounded like an actual question, not like the snide remarks that I expected from him.
“Yes. Congratulations. She is gorgeous.”
“Thank you.” There was a lull in the speaking. I kept my arms crossed. It grew awkward, but I had nothing to respond with. I wasn’t the one that asked for the conversation. I didn’t want to be here to begin with. This wasn’t on me. “To be honest, I’m not really sure I want to go through with this.”
I was surprised to hear it. It hurt me. I couldn’t believe him. Did marriage mean nothing? First me, and now that hottie? I didn’t know her, but she seemed like a very nice girl. “Oh? Calling off weddings is too much fun for you?”
“What was that?” He genuinely didn’t hear me.
“I said why do you want to call it off?”
He paused and looked at his bride to be for a bit. “I don’t know if I do want to call it off. I just don’t know if I am ready yet.” This was typical Tom. He could never commit to anything. I saw how confused he was. I felt bad, but I didn’t know how to help him. This was some much deeper issue that I didn’t have enough experience to help with.
“Then you shouldn’t have proposed.”
“Yeah. Well. It was complicated.”
I saw the crack in his perfect life. The foundation to his hard exterior was faltering and I was here to see it crumble. His eyes grew wet. He stopped talking. “What’s going on?” I became more concerned the more his brows furrowed. He was really having a difficult time.
After a second he took a deep breath. “I don’t know. I was pressured into this sort of. Or, at least I feel pressured. I don’t know.”
“Oh. That’s not good. You two seem so happy, though. What’s the problem?” he seemed so in love and ready to marry her when he spammed my timeline with photos and posts about her all the time. It was as if nothing else went on in his life. Just the thrill and excitement of expensive vacations with one of the prettiest girls in California.
“When I asked her to marry me, I did it out of necessity.” He was still hesitant to tell me. What did that mean? Did he feel the same way when he proposed to me? Like I needed it for reassurance? I had actually loved him. When I said yes it was because I had thought about spending the rest of my life with him years before he showed me a ring. I felt sick to my stomach. I didn’t want to have to coach him through his wedding after he shattered me before mine.
“What do you mean?”
“She said that she was pregnant.” He dropped the bomb. I didn’t want to hear that. He had always been so careful. I couldn’t imagine him not using protection. Even when I was on the pill he would use it, just in case. He was never ready to be responsible for another person. That was an even bigger commitment than marriage. “I couldn’t have that happen. I loved her enough that I thought it could work, but now she isn’t pregnant anymore. I don’t know if she ever was. But I can’t go back on it, because then our parents will ask. My mom and dad were already furious at me when we….”
“Yeah.” He didn’t have to say anything. I knew. I had loved his parents like they were my own. They treated me like family. I was certain that I was going to become family. They must have felt the same way. I wondered if they liked her as much as they liked me. I wondered if they were j
ust being nice to me. They were such sweet people, Tom could have brought in a homeless person and they would be head over heels for them.
“But you seem to be having such a great time with Grant that I wanted your advice. What keeps you two going? I know it’s probably early in your relationship, but I have to wonder. Are you two doing well?” The way he said it made me feel like he had other motives. He looked at me with hope. It made me even sicker.
I thought about his question. I wanted to help Tom, but at the same time I didn’t want him to feel like he could stomp me until I was a pulp of a person. He had already caused enough emotional damage. I didn’t need to become his relationship therapist for this one. And I didn’t want to become his rebound. I didn’t want him anymore.
“Love.” I said. I stopped picking my fingers.
“Genuine, unfaltering love. He and I may have difficult times, sure. But even when we fight, we keep what’s important in our thoughts. We just want to be happy with each other, no matter what it takes. I have never felt such a powerful amount of emotion for one person. I am in love like never before.” I could see the daggers I threw at him cut him.
“When we make decisions, we know that it is because we want to, and not because we feel like we have to. We love each other.”
I looked over to Grant. He was still chatting with my mom, making her and my father laugh. I wasn’t in love, not yet. But I could see myself falling for him. I looked back at Tom, the person I used to love. I knew all his strengths and weaknesses. I had been with him through thick and thin. When I looked at him now I didn’t feel anything. When I looked at Grant, I could feel sparks.
“I don’t know if she and I have that.”
“You better find out soon. It’s about to become legally recognized.” I did have some pity on him. It would be hard to be stuck in a relationship without love. It would be hard to be stuck in a relationship period. Without love, he would become bitter and either have to get a divorce or stay unhappily married if he waited too long.
Auctioned to Him 6: Damage Page 88