by KC Mills
“Okay, I’m ready, sorry.” Karen rushed in, gripping a leather brief case, while looking right into my eyes because she was attempting to read my mood.
My time was very important to me and she knew that, so I was sure that she was anxious about making me wait.
“You're good, Karen.” I placed my hand on her back and we waited for our hostess to lead us to our table. The second we reached the center of the restaurant my damn mood moved from zero to one hundred when I laid eyes on Nonie grinning and smiling at that nigga, Laken. I had to be seeing shit, because there was no way she would be in here sharing a meal with a nigga that she knew would put a bullet in my head and not think twice about it.
“Siah, what's wrong?”
I was so caught up in what I was seeing that I hadn't realized I was standing with my fists clenched, jaw tight and chest heaving in and out, until I heard Karen say my name.
I ignored her and made my way over to their table and slid into the booth right next to Nonie. Her damn eyes looked like they would pop out of her head because they stretched so wide. The second I threw my arm around her shoulder and kissed her neck, she damn near stopped breathing.
“The fuck is this shit, Pretty?”
Laken was a cocky nigga like me, so he kept his cool and didn't say shit, but he kept his eyes on me, his jaw tight, and face clearly showing his agitation. Fuck him though, he was in my city, with my girl, unannounced and without permission.
“What are you doing here?” Fumbled out of her mouth, which struck a nerve.
“Business, now what the fuck is this?” I asked again, this time with a little more aggression.
“Business,” Laken said and then chuckled.
I cut my eyes at him and then looked at Nonie again.
“I'm pretty sure I purchased a building where she has an office for business purposes. So this shit right here ain't business, my nigga, and I damn sure wasn't talking to you.”
“Siah, it’s business, but it doesn't matter. Please leave and go handle whatever you were in the middle of.” Her eyes moved to Karen, who was standing near their table with a grin on her face.
I pinched the bridge of my nose and inhaled slowly. I removed my body from the bench next to Nonie and then adjusted my clothes when I was on my feet again. My eyes were on Nonie, who looked mad as hell, but I really didn't give a fuck. Some shit just wasn't okay and this shit right here damn sure wasn't. Instead of me acting a fool and shooting up this damn restaurant, I decided to let it slide for a minute, but best believe that I was having a conversation with her later to make sure she understood my feelings on the matter. For now, I was shutting whatever this was down.
“I’ll be by your spot in an hour to get you. I bet you better be there.”
She sucked her teeth but didn't say anything while I turned to Laken.
“Look, my nigga, you’re in my city. You get a pass on this shit right here, but let's be clear, she is not available.”
This muthafucker chuckled and looked at Nonie. “I guess I’ll get with her about that.”
“Nah, you won't. I’m telling you now, she’s not available. Wrap this shit up.” I pointed at Nonie and then walked away.
“Sir, do you still need a table?” With everything going on, I hadn't even noticed that our hostess was standing quietly waiting.
“Nah, we’re good, baby girl. ’Preciate it.” I nodded and started toward the front of the restaurant with Karen on my heels.
“I take it we’re going to reschedule.”
“Yeah, I need to handle this shit right now.”
“She’s pretty, Siah,” Karen said as she attempted to keep up with me. I was beyond pissed and moving fast as hell. Faster than she really needed to be going in those damn high ass heels that were on her feet.
Ignoring Karen’s comment about Nonie, I glanced over my shoulder at her and stopped when we reached the front entrance. I had to get Karen’s nosey ass on her way so that I could get my head right.
“Who is she? It's not like you to be worried about a female.”
I could tell from Karen's question that she was a little jealous. She was right, if you weren't in my immediate presence, then I didn't have two fucks to give about who else occupied your time, but Nonie was different. I knew I was wrong as fuck, but she wasn't allowed to be with anyone but me, even with all the women I ran through.
Trust me, I wasn't naïve, and I knew that it was possible, even likely that she was chillin’ with other dudes. As long as I didn't have to see that shit, I was good, but she damn sure wasn't about to be kicking it with Laken. That nigga wanted what I had, and in the worst way. Nah, not happening.
“She is none of your got damn business. I’ll call you to reschedule. Have a good evening, Karen.” I pushed the door open and waited for her to walk through it.
I followed and made my way to my car, but I damn sure wasn't about to leave. Pretty had better be bringing her ass up out that restaurant and real got damn soon, or all bets were off and I was dragging her ass up out of there.
Not long after, I watched from my car as Laken and Nonie exited the restaurant. I was close to running up on both their asses when he hugged her, but I kept my cool because when he tried to kiss her, she pushed him away.
This nigga apparently didn’t like that because he tried again, and she held her arm out to keep her distance from him. That was her only saving grace, otherwise she would have been witnessing a homicide because my gun was loaded and in my lap.
After a brief conversation, Nonie was on her way to her car and Laken to his. I was happy as fuck that she drove because it meant that she didn't let him scoop her up at her spot. That shit would have really had me heated because he damn sure didn't need to be anywhere near where she laid her head. I pulled out behind Nonie, keeping my distance, and followed her home. When we reached her house, I was a few minutes behind her because she was already at the door when I pulled into her driveway.
I knew she was pissed because she looked back at me, walked inside and slammed the door, without even saying anything. I at least expected an argument, but she wasn't even offering that. Fuck all the attitude, she was just gon’ have to get over it. I made my way to the door, used my key to enter, but the damn door didn't open, which meant that she had the security bar on it. I knocked, called her name and waited, but of course she ignored me, so I made a quick call.
“What's up, Rocket? I’m about to text you an address, I need you to head over here and check out a door for me. Imma need it replaced tonight.”
“Tonight, Siah, damn? I don't know if—”
“Nigga just be here and make that shit happen, aight. You can come check it out first to see what you need, but it will be handled to night.”
“Aight, yo, send me the address.”
I ended my call and shot him a text with Nonie's address. When you have money, anything is possible. After I slid my phone into my pocket, I proceeded with my plan and kicked the shit out of her door until I broke that bitch off the hinges.
“What the hell is wrong with you? You just broke my damn door!” Nonie screamed from her hallway.
I stepped inside and moved to her with the quickness grabbing her arm and pulling her with me toward her bedroom.
“Your petty ass shouldn't have put that security bar on, and I wouldn't have had to break that bitch.”
Noine yanked away from me and gave me the most hateful stare just before we entered her room.
“I didn't feel like dealing with you. I swear you need to get a fucking grip, Siah. You don't own me and you can't just break my door down because I don't want to talk to you.”
I laughed before shoving her further into the room. “I did that shit, didn't I?”
“I swear I hate you sometimes. I’m not in the mood, Siah. You really need to leave, and if you put your hands on me one more time—”
“One more time then what, Pretty? The fuck you gon’ do but just take it? And for the record, I didn't put my hands on yo
u.”
She stood there looking at me like she was thinking about her next move. I could see her mind working, while she chewed on her bottom lip with her face all balled up. It was cute as fuck, and I wanted to kiss her, but I needed to get some shit straight first. She had other plans because out of nowhere her hand was in the air and flew across my face hard as fuck.
That shit stung like a muthafucker. I flexed my jaw while the reality of what she had just done settle in. Nonie knew I would never lay hands on her. That shit just wasn't gon’ happen, but that wouldn't stop me from jacking her little ass up. She took a step back, anticipating my reaction, but I simply released a low chuckle.
“You good now?” I asked with my eyes locked on hers.
“No, I’m really not. I can be with whoever I wanna be with, Yosiah. Why would you do that? Why do you care if I’m with someone else if I’m not with you?”
“The fuck you mean why do I care? You sound dumb as fuck, Pretty.” I moved past her and leaned against her dresser, while her eyes followed me.
“I sound dumb because you can fuck every bitch that smiles at you, but I can't have dinner with one guy?”
“Hell no, you can't. Not when that muthafucker is trying to take what I have and will not hesitate to put a bullet in my back. And notice I said back because that’s the kinda nigga you breaking bread with. He grimy as fuck, Pretty. He’s the type of nigga that’s not even man enough to look you in your eyes while he’s trying to take your life. That’s what you want? You’re good fucking with a nigga that wants me six feet under?”
“Tonight wasn't about you. It was about me, and contrary to what you think, it really was business. I’m hosting a party for him and we were just finalizing the details.”
I peeped how she ignored everything I said about Laken wanting to take me down, but she already knew that. She was far from stupid, but her confession made me laugh.
“Come on, baby girl. That shit wasn't about business. Maybe for you, but it damn sure wasn’t for him. And the way your ass was grinning and smiling in that nigga’s face, it wasn't business for you either.”
“It was definitely business, for both of us. But even if it wasn't, I’m single, Siah. I can grin and smile at whoever I want.”
Taking in her words, I just watched her face. She was uncomfortable under my stare, so she began fidgeting a little. I stepped away from the dresser I was leaning against and closed the space between us so that our bodies were inches apart. I towered over her, looking down while she looked away.
“You’re single, Nonie?” My hand was on her chin, tilting her head back so that I could see her eyes.
“Yes,” she said firmly, even though her body was saying no.
I let my lips touch hers, but not really kissing her at first. I just held the position, letting my lips gently press against hers, while her eyes were on me. I knew she wanted to pull away, but she couldn't. She wanted me to kiss her, so I obliged, letting my tongue move into her mouth. As it danced with hers I felt her body lean into mine until I released our attachment and she straightened up a little.
“You’re not mine anymore, Nonie?” I asked with a cocky grin, which I could tell upset her a little because she stepped back.
“No, I’m not, and you’re not mine.”
“I’m yours, Pretty, and you’re mine. Don't let that shit fool you. Titles don't mean shit, baby girl.”
“It's not titles that I’m worried about, Siah. It's all the other bitches you’re fucking.”
I let that slide because it wasn't worth discussing right now. We were talking about her and Laken, so I walked over to her bed and sat down.
“Come here.”
“I'm good right here.” She folded her arms and sucked her damn teeth, but all I could focus on were her pretty ass lips, even though they were turned down into a frown.
“Nonie, come sit your ass down so we can talk.”
The look I gave her made her rethink her decision, but she still held off for a minute before she actually moved and sat next to me.
“Look, I know I ain't perfect, but you already knew that shit. As far as your ass being single, man, fuck that. You know better. Let me find out you fucking anybody but me, and it's gon’ be a problem.”
“How is that even fair? How can you even say that with a straight face?”
I chuckled. “’Cause I’m dead ass serious. I mean that shit, Pretty. Why do you need anybody else? I know it ain't ’cause you're not satisfied.” I glanced at her with a smirk and she rolled her eyes. “You not satisfied, Pretty?”
“It's not about sex, Siah. I don't want a man I have to share, and that’s who you are. That's all you’re going to be to me, and I deserve better than that.”
“You don't share me, Nonie, and you know that. Yeah, I might fuck a few other females, but that shit don't mean nothing. You think they get what you get? You the only person I drop everything for without a second thought. You call me and I’m there, you need me and I’m there. They can't get that shit. They can't get noting from me but this dick.”
She laughed sarcastically and was on her feet with her arms folded again. “That right there is what I’m talking ’bout. Why is that okay with you and why would you think that it's okay with me?”
“’Cause it's who I am, it's all I know. Fuck, Nonie. I’m trying to be better for you, ’cause you’re right, you do deserve better, but this shit ain't easy. I don't even know why I do that shit ’cause I swear on everything it don’t mean nothing—”
“Then you need to choose. I can't keep doing this, Siah. It's too hard. I don't wanna think about you being with anyone else, and the second you walk out my door that’s exactly what I do. I obsess over what bitch is laying in your bed. It's not fair, and it's too much.”
“No other bitch is laying in my bed, Pretty. That’s our bed and I wouldn't disrespect you like that,” I said playfully, trying to ease the tension.
“You know what I mean, Siah.”
Before I had a chance to address her last comment, I heard a heavy pounding on the door, followed by the bell and then my name being called. Thank goodness, Rocket was here to fix her damn door.
“Yo, I need to go holla at him so that he can fix your door, give me a minute.”
“I’m going to bed, Siah. Just lock the door when you leave.”
I just walked out her room and didn't say shit. I would make sure to lock the door, but best believe I’d be on the same side she was on when I did it.
I chilled in the living room making calls and drinking while Rocket fixed Nonie's door. When he was finally done, I paid him and sent him on his way. Nonie stayed in her room, but I knew she had showered and gone to bed because the scent of her body wash filled the damn house like she used the entire bottle.
After I showered, I stood beside the bed watching Nonie sleep. She looked so damn peaceful, but I knew her heart was conflicted. She was in love with me and I didn't know what to do with that. Honestly, I loved her too, but I couldn't handle how that made me feel. To me, love meant death.
My mother loved me and died giving me life. My father loved my mother and me, which forced him to make the toughest decision of his life and that was to choose which one of us lived or died. When it was all said and done, it was her decision. She made him promise that I would take my first breath, even if it meant she was going to take her last.
He was never the same after that. Everything about him changed, and his heart has been off limits ever since. Because of it, he raised me to protect mine, and that’s all I knew. I wanted to love Nonie, I wanted to be what she needed, I just didn't know how to. But I could feel the line being drawn, and I needed to get my shit together because losing her was not an option.
Jock
“Damn, these joints are fresh as fuck, Siah. I need to order these.” I held up a pair of grey leather high tops that were on a display in our shop. We kept the hottest shit in there, thanks to Siah. He was good for that. I loved expensive shit, but he knew h
ow to find it. Neither of us were flashy with it, but you knew we were paid. No labels or logos necessary, but our fly was obvious as fuck just from looking at us.
“I got you, bruh. I already ordered them shits for you, all three colors. The navy and black ones are on their way too.”
“My nigga. You be on our shit.” I dapped Siah and placed the shoe back on the display.
We had just finished up our meeting with AJ and decided to give him a chance. After I filled Siah in on how he stopped me a few weeks ago asking for work, Siah wanted to check him out. When we finished up, he liked him, but was still on the fence, so for now he was getting put on but only on a small scale. We’d start him out on the corner under supervision, and see how he handled things. If he proved worthy, he could get a shot at something more.
“Aye, I do what I can,” Siah said as I followed him to the back where our offices were.
I didn't even know why I had one because other than popping in to occasionally peep what was new, I was never here, but Siah insisted on keeping one for me. He was just like that, never wanted me to feel like I wasn't an equal part of everything that we had. I would never see it that way though, because we were family. He had me and I had him. There wasn’t a damn thing that could come between that, no money, no bitches, and no situations, business related or otherwise.
I took a seat in one of the chairs in front of Siah's desk while he walked to the corner of the room and opened the floor safe. After removing two money bags, he set them on his desk in front of me and then got comfortable in his chair. It was money we were using to make a buy for one of our locations, which I handled.
“Hollis delivered these last night.” Siah nodded to the bags and I did the same to acknowledge them.