by L. U. Ann
"Well, it's late, Devon. I would hate for you to have to drive home at this hour. Why don't you stay the night?"
My heart stops... I think.
"Since you're going to be a doctor and took such good care of her earlier, you can help Lacey with Evan overnight since Lane won't be here."
"What?" I jump up, looking at them as though they are aliens. Mom's smiling. Seriously? I'm not ready for this yet.
"Don't be silly, Sweet Child. Your Prince Charming isn't going to do anything under your parents' roof. Are you, Devon?" Grandma Pain winks at him.
I roll my eyes and proceed to the bathroom to brush my teeth and get ready for bed. The chatting behind me continues, and I just ignore it. How can I sleep with Devon here? I don't think I'm going to get a wink of shut-eye, thanks to my hormones.
When I open the bathroom door, I find a drool worthy Devon with an extra sparkle in his eye, waiting for me. Ah, shit! He helps me to bed, allowing me to stop and hover over Evan for a little bit. That little man is my top priority, and I silently promise I'll do everything I can to keep him safe. His soft breaths, balled hands, and that bottom lip. Oh my, this little guy is going to steal hearts. He is so yummy.
After a ridiculous amount of time, I get in bed with Devon gently resting behind me.
Lifting himself on his elbow to speak in that sultry voice, he says, "I love you. I can’t tell you how happy I am to finally have you. Not to frighten you, but I plan on spending the rest of my life making you happy.”
A tear escapes my eyes. I want to believe this can happen. I’m just scared he’ll turn out like Caine did. Are all guys like that?
Devon reaches under my chin, leaning in to steal my lips. His kisses are soft, allowing me to take up his delicious taste. We kiss for a while until our hands become hungry to feel more. Devon shifts his body weight so that he’s not putting any pressure on me, but hovers over me, making me gasp for more. “Can I hold you tonight?”
Oh my God, can this guy get any better or am I dreaming? I nod and settle into a beautiful sleep.
"Good morning," he says in his low husky voice, leaning in to kiss my cheek.
"Morning." I smile. Oh Devon, please do not kiss me. I have morning breath. "Uh oh, I need to use the restroom." I roll out of bed with the help of some very manly hands, grab my trusty stick, and freshen up in the bathroom.
I take the liberty of brushing my teeth while I'm here. I think back to last night and how sweet Devon was. I cannot believe the restaurant he took me to. He asked to hold me. Wow, he's incredible. I will do everything I can to cherish and enjoy this, enjoy right here and now.
I find an empty bed and a delicious smell upon leaving the bathroom. I head towards the door, tickled by the thoughtfulness of someone fixing breakfast, when Devon walks towards me down the hallway.
"Grandma Pain is waiting for you." He smiles that devilish grin, causing me to take an extra breath. "Evan's awake and in the kitchen. She’s feeding him. I would have done it myself, but I wanted to make sure you didn't need any help. You need to take your pain medicine. Come on. Breakfast is getting cold. Let's get some food in that stomach so you can take your pills," he says, his mouth inches from mine, re-igniting that match. This guy screams sex appeal.
Please God, make this work.
I hear my phone vibrating on the charger. I kiss Devon and tell him I'll meet him in the kitchen in a sec.
"Hello?" I ask into the phone, knowing very well who is on the other end.
"What the fuck? I cannot believe you! Actually, yeah, I can. It's that douche bag who thinks he's a doctor and wants in your pants talking you into this. Isn't it?"
I cringe at the way he speaks of Devon. Never in a million years would I think he's douche bag material. It's the one on the other line.
"Did you get the paperwork, Caine?" I ask with a heavy sigh.
"Why yes, I did," he spits, full of hatred. "It was wonderful waking up to the fucking doorbell, and then coming face to face with a parting gift from you. A separation?!" His voice rises. "Dammit, Lacey! You want a fucking separation?! You're fucking mine. Not his."
Tears begin to well up at his harsh words. It brings back the painful memories of him screaming at me while I was on the ground. He kicked you, Lacey. He pushed you down the stairs, Lacey. He threatened to kill you, Lacey. That's just what I need to remember.
"You really want to leave me?" he asks, sounding a little hurt.
"YES!" I shout into the phone. "You tried taking Evan away from me! How could you even think of doing something like that? You are a monster, Caine! I can't believe I ever loved someone like you. Empty promises, lies, and cruel retaliation because you don't get what you want. It's so wrong, Caine, and I refuse to allow Evan to grow up in a home like that. You cheated on me, Lord knows how many times. You've beaten me. You have done too many awful things to ever make this relationship work. Sign the papers, Caine, and you'll be a free man to screw whomever you want. Although, nothing ever stopped you before." My blood is pumping hard.
"HE.IS.MY.SON! You will not keep him from me. I don't care what your little boy toy thinks. He's my son and you are my wife. I will get you both back!"
Click, the phone line is dead.
Pulling the phone from my ear and staring at it, I don't know what to do. Is he still planning on taking Evan from me?
Grandma Pain swings my bedroom door open, and walks over to sit next to me. "Sweet Child, I'm so sorry that grandson of mine has no manners. I will deal with him. Please don't worry yourself."
Shaking my head in disbelief at all the spiteful things Caine said, I tell Grandma Pain, "I don't know if cutting him out of your will is what it's going to take to get him to have some compassion. He seems bound and determined to think I'll take him back. I don't think he'll ever let me go. A long, uphill battle may have just begun. I won't go back, Grandma Pain. I don't love him and cannot believe I ever loved someone like him. He's out to hurt me, regardless of what it does to Evan, his future, or in regards to your will." Covering my face, I allow myself to cry, fearful of what the future holds.
Chapter Eight and a Half
"No!" I scream, "Not again."
I wasn't there. Why did I have to go out with my friends to the movies? Nothing is more important than this. Please, God, don't take her from us.
"Lacey, calm down. She's become toxic from the medication the doctor prescribed. They're working on her and it will all be okay."
I shake my head. I can't believe we are going down this road again.
"Stop getting yourself worked up. We need to be calm for her. You aren't going to like what you see, but I need you to be strong. She needs you," Dad says, trying to put a rational thought where there are only screams of terror.
I nod, not able to make that promise.
My stomach drops at the sight of Mom on the hospital bed, tubes coming out of her mouth. Machines are all around, beeping and telling us whether she's going to pull through this.
I shake my head at Lane. "I don't understand."
Dad explains, "Don't be alarmed by those tubes. They are feeding her stomach charcoal to get rid of the toxins."
"No, I don't understand how a doctor could prescribe her medicine that could make her wind up like this. How can a doctor do this to Mom?"
"It's okay," Lane whispers in my ear. "We caught it early. She'll probably stay here for a while, Lacey. Please prepare yourself for her to go to Sheppard Pratt once she's stable."
I nod, knowing it's for the best, but how did it get to this point? How come Dad didn't know this was going on?
"Why is it always us, Lane?" I ask, not caring if he hears me. Giving me a half-hearted smile, Lane shakes her head not having the answers.
All day, all freaking day, I stay in bed. I can't do it again. I'm so scared. The only refuge I have is to lock myself inside my head, and to become a recluse. I don't know what else to do anymore. Caine's going to win. He's going to take Evan away. I need to shut down, hide from reality, an
d it will all be okay. It's the coping mechanism I've been using practically my entire life. I have a little boy to care for. I feel like an awful parent. I can't even bring myself to get out of bed.
Aromatic flowers litter my room along with soft classical music to soothe my gnawing emotions. Devon has been peeking in throughout the day. He understandingly rubs my back and whispers sweet words of consolation in a restrained voice, trying to pull me out of my funk. I've barely risen to take my medicines. However, Devon cleverly coaxes me by recapping the doctor's words. 'You must take these as prescribed or you will find yourself back in here'. Knowing that that's the last place I want to be, I oblige.
At this moment, he's caressing my head with his tender touch, brushing the strands away from my face.
"Lacey, please don't worry. I called the lawyer and told him about Caine threatening you. He wants us to go to the courthouse tomorrow and file a restraining order for you and Evan."
I stare ahead into nothing. Did Caine threaten me? I don't believe it will work. Why would a judge grant a restraining order against a parent? He can't be held accountable for threatening to take him to Maine. Can he? I was in the hospital and Evan would have been separated from both parents. I may have just lost this fight. At some point, I fall back into a dark abyss away from the world, reality, and the ones I love.
The warmth of a precious little bundle is placed beside me. He's asleep, dreaming about something good, eyes fluttering behind their sweet little lids, with an occasional smile. I love watching him sleep. I pray he's dreaming of rainbows and butterflies. Nah, he's probably dreaming about something as simple as his bottle. I giggle to myself, and run the back of my hand over his soft downy head of peach fuzz, and I love every bit of it.
I look up and find Devon watching me intently. I feel the need to apologize profusely for how I dealt with the phone call this morning.
"Devon..."
He shakes his head. Tears sting my eyes for the hurt I may have caused.
"I'm sorry."
He brings his eyebrows together in confusion, and stealthily slides over to the other side of Evan on the bed. His big, strong hand gently strokes my face.
"Don't be sad. You didn't do anything wrong, Lacey. I'm worried about you, though. I don't know how to make things better for you. I want to take away all this pain. It hurts to watch you shut everyone out."
Closing my eyes, the realization hits me. He doesn't know everything about me. I really don't want to go there right now, but I'll need to tell him before we take our relationship any further. Leastways, I think I should. Hell if I know what's right and wrong anymore, but retelling my horrible past is imminent. It's only a matter of time until this ship plunges into the deep sea of emotions sinking me.
"Sweetheart, listen, while you were asleep, Caine called."
My eyes widen at the sound of that traitorous name. What does he want now? Is he on his way to take Evan? No, I can't do this. He can't take him. Squeezing my eyes shut, I try to get my nerves under control.
"Sweetheart, it's okay. Your mom talked to him."
My eyes fly open, confused.
"Wha–"
"He apologized to your mom and promised her he won't do anything to hurt you or Evan. I don't think I should be the one to tell you. Will you please talk to your mom? I think you'll be surprised to learn some of the details of their conversation. I'll stay here," he says, scooting closer to Evan and placing an enchanting kiss of honey on the top of his head.
Shit, he's too attached to Evan. It wasn't supposed to happen. What have I done now? He's killing my pain, and knocking down each and every barrier I've erected for protection. Am I worthy?
Begrudgingly, I force myself to go. I find Grandma Pain and Mom sitting at the kitchen table sipping tea. Mom gives me the run down and feels confident that Caine was acting in anger with awareness sinking in that he's actually lost me. Seriously? What part of 'we are through' does he not understand? Was he still holding onto hope? Mom and Grandma Pain reassure me that I have nothing to worry about. I'm still nervous. I may always worry when it comes to Caine and the control he has over me.
I decide to forego the restraining order for now. My stomach finally wakes now well past suppertime. Devon has told me that taking my medicine without food could make me sick or give me an ulcer. I’m already sick to my stomach so I figure what the hell is a little pill going to do? I might listen to him next time. My passionate concierge.
Four weeks, well actually thirty-two days, since I’ve left the hospital, and I believe I am healed and as good as new. Mom and Lane have been driving me back and forth to my physical therapy appointments. Grandma Pain has reluctantly returned to Florida after Devon took all of us to Opera Night at Sotto Sopra. We all had a wonderful time. I think Evan even enjoyed himself. Whom am I kidding? He fell asleep within minutes of our meal.
Grandma Pain purchased a cell phone while she was here, so that I could reach her anytime Caine causes me grief. That woman is out of this world. We’ve made plans for her to fly back for Christmas, and that is going to make it all the more special. Caine has signed the Separation Papers and we are now legally separated. According to the state of Maryland, we have to live apart for three hundred and sixty five days before we can file for divorce. Technically, we haven't lived together since last October, but Devon's lawyer wants to play it safe and make sure we walk a clean line in case Caine pulls anything.
Caine has called a couple of times wanting me to put the phone up to Evan's ear so he could talk to him. He tells me he is going to be deployed soon and will be visiting once he returns. I cross my fingers that he hits his head going up the steep ladders in the submarine and gets amnesia. If only I could be so lucky.
Devon and I have been taking it slow. He hasn't pushed our relationship, but it's getting to the point we both want more. The air is palatable between us where ever we are. We are going to need to release some of the intense sexual frustration soon. On more than a handful of occasions, we've stopped so close to that next step. Devon wants to make our first time special, so we are waiting.
It's a Saturday night in late June and he is sweeping me off to Annapolis for the evening. Our first stop is Osteria 177 to have dinner with Devon's parents. I'm meeting them for the first time. Talk about a little nervous. I feel flush and my hands are sweaty. They live on the outskirts of Annapolis in a giant house overlooking The Chesapeake Bay, but this is one of their favorite restaurants, and so, this is where we are going.
Afterwards, Devon is surprising me with another stop, and then we are going back to his place. I've only been there once before, and that was recent. We quickly realized we couldn’t be alone without things getting heated instantaneously. Tonight is different. We will be taking our relationship further. I secretly pray he is the one who I will spend my forever with, and with that thought, I know I'm ready to take this further.
Of course, Frank is driving. It seems like he's always driving. I don't know what the problem is with driving your own vehicle. He stops in front of the restaurant and Devon offers me his hand. Once I step out into the warm evening air, my fingers immediately start to tidy up my dress. I'm self-conscious about my appearance. Devon takes hold of my hand, bringing my fingers to his lips as we proceed to the entryway. A polished man dressed in attire screaming Italian opens the door for us. Just as I’m saying thank you, I hear ‘Dev!’ from a female voice. It breaks my concentration, and following the source, I’m met with the same alluring blue eyes of the man I love. My face heats as Devon lets go of my hand to hug and kiss both cheeks of the glamorous woman before us. It's not fair for someone to be gifted with such beauty. She has dark brown hair placed in a twist off her right shoulder. She's wearing a red, form-fitting cocktail dress with matching heels that make her as tall as Devon. He must have gotten his height from his dad.
With an arm wrapped around his mother's back, Devon says, “Lacey, I’d like to introduce you to my mom. Mom, I’d—“
“Oh, nonsens
e! Lacey, Darling, I’m so glad to finally meet you,” she gushes, wrapping her arms around me. “It’s about time he stops hiding you from us.” Pulling back a little to take in my appearance, she continues, "Dev has told me so much about you. I am so happy you are here, and I cannot wait to meet someone else who’s stolen my son's heart."
Oh, wow! I won't lie. I’ve been nervous about what they would think of me having a baby. For Heaven's sake, I'm still married and dating their son. How many parents are joyous to hear that their son or daughter has fallen in love with someone who has all this baggage? I'm clearly a winner!
“It’s nice to meet you, too,” I say and smile. Thank you, Heaven above, for her sweet disposition. I don't think I could handle another Julie.
“Dad. Lacey.” Devon moves around to the strong man standing just off to his mom’s side. He is everything masculine: fit, a chiseled jaw slightly obscured by day old stubble, and blue eyes. Devon didn't get his eyes. They’re cold and icy, whereas Devon's are a bright, piercing blue. He did inherit his sandy blond hair from his father, though.
“It’s nice to meet you, Lacey.” He extends his hand to me. His voice seems strained, and it causes me to be a little more nervous.
“Mr. Holmes, it’s nice to meet you, too,” I say, my eyes focused on his. Finally, I break what feels like a staring contest, and glance over at Devon who’s all smiles. I know this means a lot to him, and I hope I make a good impression for him.
“Our table is ready.” Mr. Holmes speaks up.
We file behind, but not without Devon's mom pulling me into her arms again, telling me how excited she is to meet one of Dev's girls.
Dev's girls?
"Oh, Honey, I didn't mean it like that."
Oh, I politely smile, glancing over at Devon who's rolling his eyes.
"Oh stop it, Dev. You very well know that I hardly get a chance to meet one of your girlfriends."