by Amy Marie
“No,” I say blindly reaching into the passenger side of the car, looking for my cell, and coming up empty handed. Thinking hard I remember leaving it on my bed.
Double. Fucking. Shit.
~~
“That girl didn’t care that you are giving me a ride home?” I ask him as I place my hands over the heater in his car.
His large hands reach over to turn the heat up and he chuckles. “That girl’s name is Wendy and no, she doesn’t care.”
We finish the rest of the drive in silence and when he pulls in front of my apartment I ask, “Is she your girlfriend?” I can’t help but ask. I guess because I am looking for more fuel for him to tell him to stay away from me.
Pausing for a moment to think he leans over, brushing his finger over my resting hands on top of my lap. My instinct is to pull away but I can’t. I can’t do a lot of things while he is around.
He pulls into my parking lot in front of my apartment. “Would it matter?”
I shake my head and finally pull my hand away. “No. It wouldn’t. Thanks for the ride.”
I slam the door as I step out, keys in hand ready to go inside and call Braden when I hear Ryder’s door slam shut. I throw my head back, glancing up to the clouds in the sky.
“Get back in your car, Ryder,” I request keeping my eyes trained above me.
“Just tell me where you went?” His voice sounds defeated.
It’s a broad question but I know what he is asking. He wants to know where I ran off to.
My shoulders slump as I turn towards him. “It’s not your business.”
His head shakes from side to side. “I drove you home so I should at least get one of my million questions for you answered, and when you left you were my business.”
I blow out a foggy breath, giving in. “CHS.”
His face morphs into excitement and then drops. Stepping towards me he seems as though he wants to pull me into his arms but then thinks better of it. “Is that why you left? To go to the art school? We could have made things work, Hadley. You didn’t have to leave me.”
“You got one question, Ryder. I answered. We’re done,” I say pointing my gloved finger towards him. I carefully walk on the iced over sidewalk to my stairway and hear him mutter “for now” before his car door slams.
After taking off all of my wet clothes and throwing them on my kitchen floor until I could take them to the communal dryer, I hear the ring of my cell phone from the bed. I run to pick up seeing Janie’s name pop up on the screen.
“Janie!” I answer excitedly. She works with Braden and runs the annual Christmas party.
“Hadley! I need your help! I have no time to plan the holiday party this year. Do you think we could hire your company to do it?”
After a few more minutes on the phone and a quick text to Noe about the new event, I dial up Braden to tell him all the good news from today. I also let him know I need a jump for my car and even if he doesn’t plan to attend the party I will be.
It’s seven a.m. on Monday morning and I’m sitting in my car, head against the headrest staring at the stairs leading up to Hadley’s apartment. I can see the ice that has formed on each step overnight. I can see a light glowing from what I assume is her living room but I don’t see her car in the parking lot. I’m guessing she never went back out to get it.
I’m not a stalker. I didn’t know she lived in the complex that I’ve driven passed every morning before work and every afternoon on my way home. I had the means at the station to find out where she lived but never used them. For four months, I have unknowingly gone past her apartment twice a day and now that I know I couldn’t help but stop, especially since I see that her car isn’t in here.
Checking to make sure she doesn’t still need help would be the gentlemanly thing to do. What’s holding me back is the possibility of her boyfriend being there too. I don’t want to knock on the door only to have him answer. I’d hate for a fight to start that I would have to finish.
As I sit and debate whether or not to grow some balls and head up the icy steps I think about what she said just fourteen hours earlier.
She ran off to Chicago High School of Arts and didn’t tell me. We had talked about it extensively the summer before our senior year on how we would make it work. We had it all figured out. We could talk every night, and I would drive down to see her every weekend. I know she was hesitant to switch schools at the end of her high school career but we both knew she really wanted to go, and I was doing all I could to support her and push her to go. She ended up not getting accepted or at least that is what she told me. She must have lied and for her just to drop everything and leave for Chicago without a word guts me. I was always her biggest supporter. Maybe she just wanted a clean break and to not have to worry about our relationship while she went and lived her dream. I could understand that. Then I think about the job she has now and shake my head.
The past four months have seemed like an eternity. It felt longer than the seven years that I hadn’t seen Hadley. I tried hard to keep myself from going to her work, to avoid texting her. Asking Jace to find out from Noelle how she was doing was out of the question since he lost her to that other guy. So, I kept to myself, remodeled the house a bit, went to the gym more, and hung out with Wendy. Then all of the sudden she slams into me, literally, and I couldn’t help but gravitate towards her. Ditch everyone I was with and take her home, even though I probably could have helped her get the car started. I know I could have but I wanted alone time with her.
At some point I must have gotten out of my car and made my way up the stairs because before I realize what I am doing my hand raises and gives three loud knocks on the door. I wait a minute before deciding this was a really bad idea.
I should just go to the gym.
I turn around, grabbing the railing, and her door swings open.
“Braden, why the hell...” she starts but her words cut off when I turn and she finds it’s not him.
It’s me.
She pushes the door halfway closed so that only part of her body is hanging out. Her beautiful toned leg shows through the bottom of her way to fucking short pink cotton shorts. Her arm is raised, holding the edge of the wood tightly.
Her eyes meet mine as I’m still grasping the railing. “What are you doing here?”
I look away from her and down the stairs towards the parking lot looking for the answer. Then I remember. “I didn’t see your car. I wanted to make sure it had been taken care of.”
When I turn back her head is down, looking at her bare feet. Her toes, painted a bright red, dig into the threshold. “It’s not. I...ah...” she stutters through. “I couldn’t get a hold of Braden.”
We just stand there for a minute. Her looking down and me looking at her.
“I can take you...” I start to say at the same time she asks, “Do you want to come in?”
I nod and she opens the door the rest of the way, letting go so I can enter. When I walk in I’m surprised to see how small it is but it’s one hundred percent Hadley. Above her kitchen table is a beautiful painting of a waterfall that is so lifelike it looks to be a photograph but I know her work.
“I painted that,” she confirms, her soft voice coming from behind me.
I glance back taking a closer look at her. Her hair wild from sleep and her nipples taut from the cold outside breeze I brought in and pushing at the fabric of her sheer tank top.
“Do you always sleep like that?” I ask extending a finger towards every man’s damn fantasy.
Screw lingerie. Hadley looks edible in exactly what she has on.
Her face scrunches, the lines between her eyebrows forming as she brings her hands to her hips. “Did you need something?”
I chuckle, which makes her even angrier. I love an angry Hadley. “Did you?” I ask turning the question on her.
A growl comes from between her lips. “Ryder.”
I take a step closer. “I love the way my name falls from your lips.”
Her eyes drift to the side. I follow them finding a wall clock. “What can I do for you at seven in the morning?” she asks seemingly annoyed but her rapid breathing gives her away.
Walking over to her couch I sit down, sliding my ankle over my opposite knee. “The question is ‘what can I do for you at seven in the morning?’ I saw your car wasn’t here and I can only assume since you cannot get a hold of your so-called boyfriend that you might need some help getting your car started or a ride to work.” I drag my finger across my mouth, watching as her eyes take in the action. “Do you need a jump...or a ride, Hadley?”
She doesn’t move. She just stares taking in the double meaning of my words. Boyfriend or not, I don’t know if I could turn her down if she asked to ride me right now. It would be so easy if she just straddled me, and I could push aside the flimsy material she calls pajamas and slip right in. I could grab her face and claim her mouth, her chest, her stomach, her thighs.
“RYDER!” she screams, and I jump right out of my daydream.
I adjust myself where I sit hoping she doesn’t kick me out for the raging hard on I just caused myself. “Yes?”
“Did you hear a damn word I said?” She shakes her head walking over to the window and looks out. The light from outside shines through her shorts and I can see the curve of her ass. “I think I just need a new battery. I talked to my cousin and he thinks that is the problem but he can’t get over here until this afternoon. I was just going to call out of work but since you’re here you can help me.” She doesn’t turn my way as she continues, “I have a new contract and I want to get started so I kinda need to go in.”
I lean forward, covering my mouth with my hands, trying to hide the smile that I can’t prevent. When I get myself controlled I ask, “What about your boyfriend?”
She finally turns, shooting daggers with her eyes. “What about him?”
“Won’t he get pissed if some other guy is jumping you?”
I know how that sounds. I said it that way on purpose.
Her eyes roll into the back of her head, and her hips sway on their way to what I assume is her bedroom. Her voice is muffled but I can hear her loud and clear. “You’re not jumping me, Ryder. You’re giving me a ride to the parts store and helping me put in a new battery. After that you can go jump some other girl for all I care.”
Ouch.
The ride to the auto parts store is short and quiet. When she emerged from her room, she had on tight jeans and a flowing white shirt that covered up her amazing ass. When she put on her black boots my dick went into overdrive. Nothing is sexier than boots that come up to a woman’s knee...and they zipper. A vision of unzipping them with my teeth came to mind, and I had to shake my head several times to get my mind out of the gutter. It didn’t work.
So, now she’s riding passenger, again, and I am surprised at how comfortable this feels. We used to drive around for hours in my car. My hand would navigate its way to her thigh and sometimes I would raise it higher and higher up her shorts until her delicate fingers stopped me. I was always pushing it with her but respectful. Always respectful.
We get a new battery, drive the few miles to where her car is located and switch the old with the new. After a few minutes, it starts right up, and we let it warm up while she waits in my car.
“I owe you,” she says quietly and when I look over her green eyes look vulnerable. She seems torn. About what, I don’t know.
“Okay, well, I’d like my fee paid now if you don’t mind,” I tell her pushing a strand of her hair behind her ear.
Her eyes close and I see her instantly relax. Her chest rises and falls before asking, “What’s the fee?”
When I don’t answer right away her lashes flutter open and she peers over at me. “Ryder?”
“Hadley?”
“Ryder?” She chuckles, hitting me in the chest.
“I want another question answered. I help you, you answer a question.”
Without hesitation, she turns me down. “No.”
I reach over, hitting the button to lock all the doors. Her eyes go wide as she pulls on her handle. It doesn’t budge.
“Open the door, Ryder.” Her tone comes out as a warning.
I shake my head. “You have two options, Hadley. Answer one simple little question and I’ll unlock your door, or climb over me and use mine.” I pat my thighs for emphasis.
I wink at her as disbelief plays over her features and she crosses her arms over her chest. Part of me wants her to answer my question. The other part would love for her to climb up over my lap.
“What do you want to know?”
I turn in my seat, letting my knee lean up against the console. “What happened with your boyfriend that I’m here helping you out and not him?”
For a moment I think she might not answer. Maybe she will make my fucking week and climb over me.
“I don’t really know.” She sighs. “Last night I asked him to go sledding and he said no. Then I brought up his work Christmas party and he practically jumped down my throat about it and left. I haven’t heard from him since.”
She sounds sad. I feel bad for her. It sounds like this Braden douche isn’t good enough for her.
“What does he do? Where does he work?” I ask as I hit unlock on the door.
She makes a tsking noise with her tongue and pulls her handle. This time she is successful in opening it. “Only one question per save, Ryder.”
~~
By the time I get to work we have call after call and I have barely any time to catch my breath. After all the training with James a few months ago, he was moved for promotion purposes. As much as I wanted to get along with him we just could never see eye to eye. I got a new partner, Nate, but I see James all the time and right now he is listening to Nate give me shit at the end of our shift on why I’m so fucking happy today.
“You’ve been walking around here lately like your dog died and today you come in here like you got the greatest fucking pussy last night,” Nate says shoving his shoulder into me.
James is leaning against a locker staring at our interaction. His stance is menacing.
“Fuck off,” I tell him. Nosy asshole.
“For real though,” he continues. “You gettin’ some good shit now?”
Nate knows that Wendy and I are just friends but tend to scratch our itches when we need to. We’re just having fun, but I know the reason for my mood change.
“Nah. Something better,” I answer back, desperate to tell him like I’m some teenage chick. “That girl I went to high school with. I saw her last night when our group was up at the hill to sled. She came barreling down and ran right into me. Well,” I continue. “Her car wouldn’t start and she didn’t have a cell to reach that asshole boyfriend of hers so I drove her home. When I passed by this morning I stopped to make sure she had a car and he still hadn’t called, so I gave her a ride to her car. I don’t know, man. Even though she was standoffish I feel like maybe I might be able to get somewhere with her. That guy seems like he is going to make it easy on me.” I laugh, feeling bad for that poor bastard.
Okay, I don’t feel bad at all.
James’ phone rings and he excuses himself. Nate continues to pump me for more info on Hadley.
“This chick has got you strung up this badly, even years later? Even after she dumped your ass without even dumping your ass?”
I don’t expect Nate to understand. He has a wife and a son but they always seem to be the last of his priorities. When I was with Hadley I always put her first. For a brief moment, I allow myself to think about where we could be right now if she would have given me the chance to be there for her. To show her my support of her dream.
Kids? I don’t know
Married? Maybe.
Engaged at the least.
Working where we are? Me? Yes. Her? Hell no. I would make sure that the job she had would be one that she loves.
Maybe she does love event planning but I doubt I would see the lov
e and lust in her eyes that I saw when she painted a picture. I think about that waterfall picture in her house and imagine her smiling with each stroke of the brush as she painted it.
Nate throws questions like rapid fire at me, and I answer them as much as I can always respecting Hadley with each answer. I never really talked to anyone besides AJ about her, and it feels almost therapeutic to get someone else’s opinion. Just like James did months ago, Nate tells me that if there isn’t a ring on her finger, then there is still a chance.
I’m never one to mess with someone’s girlfriend, and I still have no idea why she left in high school without telling me. Now that I think about it, maybe that should have been my question earlier in the car. I could have found out her true reasons for ditching me. Even if the information that she and her boyfriend may be on the fritz can be used to help me out I would still like to know why I couldn’t even get so much as an email when she left.
“I need a drink,” I state clutching my bag into my hand.
A huge smile comes across Nate’s face. “Hooligan’s?”
We get our shit together and decide to catch happy hour with a few of the other officers who do traffic. They all exchange stories of conquests during their days in college and I just sit back and think about how I am going to “save” Hadley again so she has no choice but to give in and tell me why they hell she left me.
I walk into the office and stop mid-stride when I hear a weird noise. A table scrapes the floor. A chair shifts.
“Yea, Sunshine. Just like that.” A rough male voice groans out.
Oh my God. I can’t believe Noe and Trent are at it again!
I slam my bag down on my desk hoping they hear it and stop their almost daily game of hide Trent’s dick somewhere inside Noelle.
They don’t.
Ever since those two crazy kids got together they never separate. They literally don’t separate. I wouldn’t be surprised if Noelle got knocked up soon with how many times I’ve caught them having sex or how many times she has told me they have. I’m happy for them though. Trent just lost the mother of his son to cancer two months ago and even though they weren’t together he had a rough time with all of it. He’s always had a thing for Noe but I think it took a hard push from Alex, his ex, during her final months to get him to really realize what’s important. Alex wanted to leave knowing that Jason, Trent’s and her son, had a great mother figure around. Noe loves Jason like her own.