“I’m having it brought to you.”
“What? I don’t . . .”
I hold up my hand. She closes her mouth. I reach out for Vadik and give him the picture. Twenty seconds later Sharon and Matt’s heads turn toward Vadik coming out of the cave with a backpack hanging from one of his saber teeth. The look on Sharon’s face is priceless.
Vadik releases the pack and it plops to the ground between Sharon and me. He backs off and lies down. Sharon’s eyes go from the pack, to Vadik and then to me. I have an unstoppable grin. She closes her mouth and becomes very serious. “That’s not my pack.”
“Huh?”
“It’s Matt’s.”
Matt explodes with a laugh that knocks him from his squat, onto his back. I can’t help but follow and nearly fall off my rock. Sharon manages to control herself. She waits until we finally stop. “So,” she says. “Should I call you Rebecca Dolittle?”
I wipe the tears of laughter from my face, shake my head and start with my story on the last day of the semester, only three days ago.
How can it only be three days?
Other than my human to human power and ability to forecast looming death, I don’t leave anything out. She asks a lot of questions about my feeling the deer’s pain when I hit it with the car. I have her total attention and she certainly is very open-minded, though at one point I get a mental transmission of her thoughts. A world class freak. Still, she listens.
I finish. She stands and starts pacing. Matt remains sitting on the ground, his hands dangling from his raised knees. He smiles at me. He has become more handsome over the last ten months, though there is an underlying sadness. To be expected. I have a feeling his laughter a bit ago was the first in a very long time. I sense a warmth in my center, smile back and then turn away.
“I don’t like the idea of giving up a couple of cats, either,” Sharon says. “It goes against everything I believe. But I’m not a tree hugger, or in this case, an animal hugger. I don’t believe a human life should be sacrificed for an animal’s life, even an animal on the brink of extinction . . . or re-extinction in this case.”
I can’t disagree, especially when the human is my best friend.
“So, what do we do?”
I open my mouth, but I can’t say it.
“Edik is out of the picture. What about Nadia and her kittens?”
I shake my head. “Nadia is the only reproducing female. Taking her away will for sure send them back into extinction.”
“Exactly. So, that leaves Roma and Vadik.”
“Roma is their leader.”
“It’s that or your friend.” Her tone is accusatory, like I’d even think of giving up Mandi.
“Ah . . .” It’s stuck in my throat. I look at Roma. He is lying next to Vadik. I think of the two of them living in a zoo, or two different zoos, each alone, angry with me. I look down at the ground between my feet, push my fingers through my hair, and hate my thoughts. I hate the decision. I hate being placed in a position of having to make the decision. I hate the word I have to say.
“Okay,” slips past my lips.
I hate myself.
Chapter 24
The decision has been made. I had actually thought about ordering the cats to attack. Stupid idea no doubt. I’d only get Mandi killed; don’t know if I could live with that. I’ll give up two sabre-toothed cats for Mandi’s life.
I’m doing the right thing, but I hate it with a passion.
Roma and Vadik stand nearby, waiting orders. Not knowing what’s coming they’ve no chance to say goodbye to Edik and Nadia, to hug the kittens one last time, or whatever the equivalent is for cats . . . lick their faces, I guess. Maybe they won’t hate me because they won’t know that I’m their Judas. But I’ll know.
“I know what you’re feeling,” Sharon says.
“No you don’t.” If she truly understood, she’d be sick to her stomach.
I adjust my pack, not sure why I’m insisting on taking it with me. After I rescue Mandi, we’re coming back here where Sharon and Matt will be waiting. At my insistence they’re not coming with me. I figure if Lester sees someone else, he’ll probably renege on the deal and do something to Mandi. I have to go it alone.
“Maybe I don’t, but I can guess,” she says. “Stay focused on Mandi. You’re mission is only to get her out of there. Afterwards we’ll all hike out together and contact the authorities. A helicopter carrying out a couple of big cats has got to be easy to track.”
I nod my head. It makes sense, or doesn’t. By the time we hike out they’ll be long gone. I’m also sure there is no law against capturing, transporting and selling an animal that has been extinct for 11,000 years, that has never been on the endangered species list. Once in captivity, Roma and Vadik will never be free again, but maybe the bad guys can be brought to task for kidnapping Mandi and threatening her life.
I set my GPS to the coordinates where Mandi awaits, wrapped in duct tape, and then align my orientation with the arrow pointer. I don’t need the GPS because I know exactly where I’m going. Fiddling with the buttons is my way of delaying doing what I have to do. I glance at Matt. He is in his stoic state again. I know that he cares. He has simply put it away and thrown a couple wraps of duct tape around it. In a way I admire him, being able to shut it away, all the feelings, all the anger. Is that what I did when I ran off to college? I put my father and my sister away, along with the terrible memories of my mother, and wrapped it all up in duct tape.
It’s the same, but different. But I am here facing part of it. Now I’ve forced Matt to come here and face it as well. He is not at all happy about it. He is fighting his inner demons, his failures. He blames himself for his father’s death. I understand why, but he is wrong. His father’s death was not his fault. It was mine. I’m sorry, Matt.
Anything that happens to Mandi will also be my fault. My fault. When will I learn?
I force myself to look Matt straight in the eyes, the first since before heaving my guts. I want to say I’m sorry, to apologize, but I know it won’t change anything, won’t make him feel better. I don’t even know if it’d make me feel better.
I start to drop my eyes but am caught by a rise in him again, like I felt at the end of my story. It is anger and it is not directed at me, as it probably should be. It is plain and simple anger. It saddens me.
I turn away, point my nose toward an opening between two trees and step out.
For a few minutes the big cats stay close, then Roma moves ahead and to the left. Vadik splits right. Most of the time they remain in sight. When they don’t, I pull them back. It’s amazing how easy it is becoming, and how responsive they are to me; it’s as though we have been doing this since they were born; since I was born.
Why?
They didn’t have human leaders a dozen millennium ago.
Or did they? How could paleontologists tell from digging through sabre-toothed bones? Even if they were open-minded enough to suspect, there would be no way. They simply wouldn’t know.
Next question, then. Why me? Why Sam and then me? Is there anyone else with my ability? Am I the only one out of so many billions of people? And what in the hell is my purpose? Is there a purpose at all? What was the legend that Matt’s dad believed? Something about a spirit coming back with cats with long knives to take back the land. A Blackfoot legend, he had said. He believed Sam was the spirit. Then I suppose I’m the spirit now.
I laugh and snort.
I stop and look around me. Deep in my thoughts I shifted off course a little. I turn my aspect thirty degrees to my left, walk fifty yards, and then spot the meadow through the trees, glowing in the bright afternoon sun. I got off course a lot, almost walked right on by.
This is it. Only a few more steps, a few more minutes.
Just do it!
I bring my escorts in close and then begin a slow march to their end. Think stoic, like Matt. This is for Mandi.
We break from the trees and I sense nervousness from the cats. We stop right in
the middle, about the place where the helicopter sat last summer. I’m well aware of the fact that this is also the ideal spot to crate and pick them up. I go no farther; instead I stand with my left hand on Roma’s shoulder, my right on Vadik's. They know something is up; they can smell it . . . them, the smelly men with their sleep guns, but I’m able to hold them next to me.
Vadik hisses and then so does Roma.
I can also smell the men, or am I smelling them through the cats? I drop to one knee. My hands remain up on their shoulders. They want to go, to seek the source of the stench, the smell of man-sweat, and man-fart, smells that send fear racing down my spine, the urge to hunt and kill racing down theirs. I hold them only with my will. I remain still with my head bowed, my eyes closed, listening, smelling, watching through them, my cats, my sabre-toothed cats.
I become them.
I am them.
They are me.
Sarge is to the right. He makes the noise of words. Lester is to the left. He makes the noise of words. The cats can hear. So I can hear. I know the words.
I know the words.
“Now,” says Lester.
“I’m sorry,” say I and strengthen my mental grip on the cats.
Chapter 25
The shots are not loud. Pop . . . pop.
I feel the sting of the darts. First Roma. Then Vadik. They jump to charge toward the sound. I bring them back, settle them, hug them close, feel their confusion. They still trust. What will they think when they awake? Will they know what I have done, that I betrayed them? Will they be sad, lonely, angry? Will they perish of broken hearts?
Will they remember me?
I wait.
They grow tired . . . tired.
Very tired.
They stretch out on the ground.
I wait.
They sleep.
I touch them each one more time and rise to my feet. In my peripherals I see Lester and Sarge approaching, slow and cautious as though trying not to break eggs, guns at the ready. I step forward and stride directly to the trees, the entrance to the cave. Mandi is sitting right where I left her, untouched, unharmed.
“Hi,” I say.
“Hi,” she says.
I pull my knife from my pack, open it and cut the duct tape. “Sorry I took so long. Are you all right?”
“I’m okay.” I don’t bother to untie the rope. I cut it and Mandi finishes undoing herself. “Are they . . . did you . . .?” she asks.
“Yes. Roma and Vadik. I led them here and held them while they were shot with the darts.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Let’s get out of here. I can’t . . .” The words are caught in my throat. Simple words, but with the shape I’m in I couldn’t give you the time of day. Mandi grabs her pack and, keeping the trees as cover, although they aren’t paying any attention to us, we slip out and away, south along the side of the mountain. Lester and Sarge are staring down at the cats, Lester’s radio is to his face. I’m sure he is calling his helicopter.
I don’t bother with the GPS. I know where I’m going—not because I’ve gone there once, but because of cat-sense—and I go there quickly.
“Slow down!”
I don’t want Mandi to know how upset I am so I stride out fast, forcing her to try and keep up. Usually when we’re out walking together, she’s the long-legged one who forces me to huff and puff to keep up.
“Reba.”
I have to open the distance; I have to get away; I can’t watch, can’t see them taken away.
“Rebecca!”
In one snap motion I stop and turn to face her. “Nobody calls me Rebecca but my mother!” In a second snap motion I turn back around and continue my pace, almost running. I don’t look back to see if she is coming. I don’t care. I’m aware of something different, a growl to my voice when I turned on her, a desire to extend my claws and rip off her face. I don’t care about that either.
I break into the small clearing where I left Matt and Sharon. They are still there. Matt is sitting on my rock. Sharon is ten yards away, sitting on the ground with a sabre-toothed kitten lounging across her lap. Nadia is hanging close but apparently not worried. What is that all about?
Matt jumps up and I slide to a stop between them. Mandi, to my surprise, is right behind me, breathing hard, face red. I’m hardly breathing at all, but my heart is racing.
“Mandi, this is Matt and his mother, Sharon. This is Mandi.”
I can’t stand around and participate in the greetings and small get-to-know-each-other chitchat. I stomp into the cave and plop down next to Edik. His coat feels rough and smooth at the same time. His breathing is steady. I lie my head against his body and listen to his heart. It is strong and fast. “I’m sorry,” I say, and cry.
Chapter 26
There is a hand on my leg. I’m asleep but I know it is there. I knew when he walked into the cave. I have awareness.
“Reba.” I open my eyes. “Are you awake?”
“Of course I’m awake. My eyes are open.”
“Sorry. I can’t see your eyes in the dark.”
“Dark? It’s not that dark in here.”
“I just came in from the bright outdoors. You’ve probably adjusted.”
“Oh.” It wasn’t dark when I came in.
“Can you come out? We need to talk.”
“Who needs to talk?”
“You, me, Mom and Mandi.”
“Why don’t you three talk and tell me what you say?”
He pulls his hand away. “What’s your problem?”
“What do you mean, what’s my problem? I don’t have a problem. Maybe you guys are the ones with the problem.”
He goes away, leaves me alone with Edik, staring at where he disappeared through the glare. Why was I rude to him? I snapped back at him like it was all his fault this was going on. He and his mother came and saved Edik. Why am I acting angry with them?
Mandi appears in the glare. She comes in a ways and then stops. “Reba?”
The anger rises in me again. This time I catch it and push it down. It’s not her fault either. “Here,” I say.
She takes a few more steps, and stumbles. “I can’t see you.”
“Turn a little to your left . . . stop! You’re looking right at me.”
She takes a few more cautious steps and then sits down, pulls her knees up close and wraps her arms around them. “You don’t have to come out. I just . . . are you okay?”
“Yes!” I catch the snap in my voice. “I’m sorry. No. I guess I’m not okay.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Why should you be sorry?”
“It’s because of me that . . .”
“That’s not your fault.” There is a long silence. “I’m sorry that I yelled at you. You didn’t deserve that.”
“It’s okay. I understand.”
“What do you understand?”
She rests her chin on her knees. “That you’re upset at sending Roma and Vadik away. We’re all upset about that.”
I almost snap again, then catch myself, seal my mouth closed.
“Matt and his mom are planning something. They need you . . . you’re help.”
“What do you mean, planning something?”
“They want to rescue Roma and Vadik.”
I sit up straight. “Oh! What about you? You’re not including yourself in this plan?”
“I . . . I’m not sure. It’s scary.”
I think about that for a minute. They don’t have a hostage anymore. They think there are only Mandi and me. They don’t know about Matt and Sharon.
I stand. “Why not?”
Sharon is sitting on the rock now. Matt is crouched down next to her. I walk around to face them and sit on the ground. “What’s your plan?”
Mandi sits down close to Matt. I try to pretend like I don’t notice how close. The three of them turn their faces toward me.
“That depends on you,” Sharon says.
“I’m in, whatever it i
s.”
She looks at me a long time, like she’s evaluating my worth. “It depends on you a lot . . . and me for that matter. How extensive is your power over these cats?”
“To be truthful with you, I don’t know. Except for a year ago, today is the first time I’ve really used it. I can’t do anything with Roma and Vadik while they’re asleep.”
She shakes her head. “No. I’m not thinking along that line. What about Nadia and the little ones?” She looks around. “Where are they by the way?”
I lift my head and reach . . . sniff. “It’s dinner time. They’re about a hundred yards south, working on a kill . . . an elk.”
Sharon and Matt look at each other, then back at me. Sharon asks, “What did you just do? It seemed like you smelled something. It was . . .”
“It was what?”
“Animal like. Your nostrils flared.”
“I smelled the meat, the blood. Don’t you smell it?”
All three of them inhale. They shake their heads. “No,” Sharon says. “We don’t smell anything.”
We look at each other for a long time, pondering the implications.
“What else can you smell?”
“I . . .” I wrap my mind around my olfactory senses. “Lots.”
“Like?”
“Your toothpaste. Your fabric softener.” I inhale deeply and straighten my back. “Your shampoo. Strawberry. Something else; a veterinary doctor smell; not very pleasant.” I look off to my left, over my shoulder, then come back to Matt. “You have an orange in your backpack, a ham sandwich and . . .” I close my eyes. “Black licorice.” I look at him. “It seems to me you’re the one who told me not to carry unsealed food in these mountains.”
He opens his mouth, and then shuts it. He clears his throat. “The licorice hasn’t even been opened yet.”
I suppress a grin. I can smell everything, and distinguish the subtlest differences.
“You have the eyes of a cat,” Mandi says.
Sharon bends forward and looks at her around Matt. “What do you mean?”
“When I went into the cave to get her, she could see in the dark.”
Sabre-Toothed Cat Trilogy Page 102