by Martha Carr
Mattie gave her an exaggerated laugh. “Oh, come on. Do whatever you think will give me enough of an overview that we can lay the missing groundwork. I won’t say you have to remove all the glass from the floor and my chairs, but it’d be a nice start.”
The half-drow chewed the inside of her lower lip and raised an eyebrow. “Got a broom?”
“What?” The way Mattie cocked her head and turned away from her student seemed much like a cat listening to birds in the yard. “Please don’t tell me the drow halfling hasn’t learned how to cast a spell beyond a flash of light and an accidental lightbulb burst.”
“No problem.” Cheyenne folded her arms. “I can do more than that.”
“So?” The professor gestured toward the open space between them again with a tight, expectant smile. “I’m ready to drop the games.”
“Yeah, me too. But this whole magic-on-command thing isn’t my style.”
“Uh-huh.” By the time Mattie finished sighing, the predatory glint in her eyes had returned. “Okay, I get it. You’ve been doing things on your terms your whole life, and now I’m asking you to do them on mine. I don’t want to pressure you into anything. When you’re ready to come back and put some effort into learning how to control your magic, I’ll be here. Every day. From one to four.” She gestured toward her closed office door and dipped her head.
Oh, sure. It’s always attitude and willful disobedience from the Goth chick, isn’t it? Cheyenne rolled her eyes and didn’t move. “I’m ready to put in the effort now,” she muttered.
“It looks to me more like you’re trying to turn this into a powerplay, and that’s not what I’m interested in.” Mattie turned away from her and went back to her L-shaped desk. “I’m aware of where I stand in the scheme of things. And I have better things to do with my time than spend it on a halfling who pretends to be, I don’t know, whatever the hell you’re going for right now.”
The warmth at the base of Cheyenne’s spine was soft, but it stayed there, a gentle reminder of how far she couldn’t let this go. “Hold up. You’re the one who came to me.” She stepped toward Mattie’s desk. “You told me to come by your office. Trust me, I have better things to do with my time too, Mattie.”
Mattie didn’t look up at her as she shuffled through more papers on her desk. “Yes, I know you’re very busy with all the graduate work you complete in a quarter of the time it takes everyone else. It must be difficult for you to find time for anything.”
“That has nothing to do with it.” Cheyenne swallowed. The heat rose. She balled her hands into fists to force it back down. “If I didn’t want to be here, I wouldn’t have come.”
“Show me you want to be here.”
“I didn’t think I’d be joining the circus and have to perform for you.”
“That’s not an excuse.”
“I’m not giving an excuse. Why can’t you show me how to keep anyone else from seeing what I am?” The half-drow’s skin tingled, warmth spreading over her shoulders. Not now!
“Without understanding the skills you already have? I don’t think so.” Mattie tucked her hair behind her ear, still scanning the papers on her desk, and snatched a pen from the glass jar beside her computer. She started writing something. “You can forget we ever had this conversation if you can’t give me something to work with.”
“I don’t know how!” Cheyenne’s hands flew up in front of her face in frustration. An orb of black energy burst from between them and headed for the pen in her professor’s hand.
The fingers of Mattie’s other hand twitched in a small, hidden gesture, and the halfling’s magic orb froze a hair’s breadth away from the pen. The professor smiled at the magic hissing and crackling in a churning mass in front of her, then she flicked her gaze toward Cheyenne and stared at the half-drow with narrowed eyes. “I think you do.”
Cheyenne released a breath through her clenched teeth. Her nostrils flared. “When I’m pissed off, yeah.”
“Good.” The pen dropped from Mattie’s hand and clattered to the desk. Her empty hand moved beneath the sparking black magic like she meant to grab it. Then her other hand, finger still twisted in command, passed over the top of the static orb. Her lips moved almost imperceptibly. Anyone else in the room wouldn’t have heard a thing, or maybe the barest whisper, yet Cheyenne’s drow hearing caught the entire spell.
Great. Sounds like magic has its own language too.
Mattie pressed her hands around her student’s unintended attack, and the black energy shrank between her palms. The purple sparks flaring inside grew brighter and more violent as the churning mass reduced in size until with a sharp pop, it disappeared. Mattie clenched her bottom hand into a fist and straightened behind her desk. “You know what you can do and how, Cheyenne. Looks like we need to work on the when and the why.”
When the professor flung her hand toward the half-drow, something dark flew, glinting under the light. Cheyenne moved without thinking and caught whatever it was.
Mattie grinned.
Still fighting against the tingling heat in her back and shoulders, Cheyenne forced herself to open her hand and look down at the metallic diamond shape in her palm, its four points elongated and thinned out to look like a star. “What is this?”
“Call it a souvenir.” Professor Bergmann nodded and stepped out from behind her desk. “And maybe a reminder not to attack your mentor when things get a little heated.”
“Time to drop the games, huh?” Cheyenne pocketed the four-pointed star, then folded her arms and tipped her head back to eye her professor. “You knew that would happen.”
“Perhaps. Just so you know, I rarely enjoy getting under someone’s skin on the off-chance they might cast a spell with really nasty side effects.”
“Sure, you don’t.”
“You almost blew my hand off. Granted, I was being an asshole on purpose.” Mattie pointed at the halfling. “Is that a smile?”
Cheyenne pretended to be a lot more interested in the degrees and plaques on the walls. “No.”
“Okay.” Rubbing her hands together, Mattie scanned her student and nodded. “Now we know what we’re working with.”
When Cheyenne realized why the other woman was looking at her like she was a plastic ball filled with catnip, she jerked her head down to see the dark gray-purple flesh of her drow heritage peeking out from the ends of her black sleeves. “Shit.”
Both hands flew to her hair, and she spun away from the professor so she wouldn’t have to look at the woman and feel for the points of her ears at the same time. She pulled her hair, which had now gone from High-Voltage-Raven-black to drow-bone-white, trying to cover the thing people saw first.
“I think we’re past the point of you trying to hide that from me.” Mattie chuckled and stepped toward her student. “You can stop.”
Cheyenne pressed both palms against her head and turned back around. “It’s everywhere, isn’t it?”
Her professor licked her lips, smiling, and gazed at the transformed halfling in front of her. “You look like a drow, all right. It’s a shame you hide that on this side. We all do, but you?” Mattie clicked her tongue, shook her head, and crossed her office again. “This is how we’re gonna start.”
“We’re gonna start.” Cheyenne dropped her hands from her head and glanced at their dark color again. “This goes away after a few minutes.”
“Well, find your angry place.”
“I just gotta let myself cool off— Wait, what?” Cheyenne blinked, opened her mouth, then shut it again. My angry place?
“Don’t cool off,” Mattie added. “I’m assuming you can feel it when you’re about to transform, right?”
With a snort, Cheyenne rolled her shoulders. “Like being set on fire. So, yeah. Kinda hard not to feel.”
“Hmm. Excellent. Stay in that place.”
“That’s not a good idea.”
Mattie wagged a finger at her student and circled her office, taking in every angle of the drow-presenting
halfling. “It’s the best idea I’ve had all day. Before you can master keeping your drow blood down, you need to know how to ‘get it up,’ so to speak.” The woman chuckled and shrugged.
“Seriously?”
“It’s an accurate metaphor.”
“Not really.” Cheyenne stared at the ceiling, feeling the professor’s eyes on her as the other woman completed her circle of study.
Mattie stopped in front of the halfling and cocked her head. “I’m trying. Help me out a little. Oh, look at that!”
“What?” Another glance at her hands made Cheyenne reach up to feel the rounding points of her ears. She shook her head. “I told you, it goes away after a few minutes.”
“Okay. Bring it back.” Mattie’s eyes glinted. “Would it help if I slapped you?”
“It wouldn’t help you.”
“Maybe not. We’ll save that method for later. Right now, it’s time to work on making yourself angry.”
Cheyenne eyed her professor.
She’s insane. Maybe that’s what I need. “My angry place.”
“Your drow place. Or at least much closer to it. Go ahead. I’ll wait.” Once Mattie had taken a few steps back and folded her arms, the office fell silent.
“This is what fish in an aquarium feel like.” Cheyenne shook her head. “I wonder if they can get pissed on demand too.”
“You’re searching for the source of what drives your magic. Let’s start with… Oh. Don’t think I didn’t catch it when you told me about someone getting shot in the stomach.”
Cheyenne stiffened. Ember.
“On a scale of one to ten, how does that feel in terms of rage fuel?”
The heat flared along the half-drow’s skin, and it washed over her like a flash this time. Cheyenne drew a long, steadying breath.
“Okay.” Mattie nodded, her smile widening. “I struck a nerve.”
“She’s my friend.”
“That must be hard.”
“Ya think?” Cheyenne spat.
“Yep. I’d be pissed if one of my friends got shot. Did you see it happen?”
A low, warning growl escaped the half-drow’s throat.
“Right.” Mattie tapped a finger against her lips again, studying her student’s face. Cheyenne’s eye twitched. “And you wished you could’ve done something about it.”
“I did something about it,” Cheyenne hissed. “Just not enough. The asshole got away.”
“Oh, yeah? What’d you do? Tell him to stop or else?”
“You know what?” Cheyenne’s teeth ground together, and she glared at her professor. “Maybe I should just think about you when I’m trying to get pissed.”
“Hey, if that’s what works.” Grinning, Mattie leaned sideways to watch the halfling from a different angle that didn’t make sense, then snapped her fingers and lifted her hand in front of her face, pointing at Cheyenne. “There. Right there. That’s the black fire in your eyes. Hold onto that.”
“And do what?” The words came out with surprising effort. Every muscle in Cheyenne’s body burned with the heat and all the rage she’d unleashed on a bunch of moronic orcs in the skatepark. She saw Ember in her arms, covered in blood, and heard the soft, slow whisper of her friend’s pulse.
“Nothing.” Mattie didn’t take her gaze from her student’s. The smile was gone. “Just keep it there, Cheyenne. Sit with it. Keep thinking of your friend if you feel it slipping. Embrace it. Really feel it.”
“I’m gonna make you feel it if you don’t stop talking about it.” Purple and black sparks burst from Cheyenne’s fingertips and dropped on the carpet.
Mattie eyed the floor but didn’t seem to think the fire-hazard carpet was worth more attention than that. “Can you stay there without me poking the drow bear?”
A thicker spray of sparks erupted from Cheyenne’s fingers when she spread them wide. Her chest heaved, and a tremble appeared in her arm before she stomped it down. “I can stay here.”
“Perfect.” With a sharp flick of her wrist and another quick spellcasting gesture, Mattie sent a soft neon-yellow light into the air in front of them. The light rearranged itself into floating numbers—0:00. A timer began.
Cheyenne grunted and held the rage and the sparks at her fingertips and the fire inside that made her drow—or half, at least. “You started a magical timer. It better just be for this. ‘Cause I don’t run laps or anything.”
Mattie glanced around her office and pursed her lips. “I imagine you’d need more space for something like that. In here, anyway.”
Chapter Fourteen
“This is ridiculous.” Cheyenne paced across Professor Bergmann’s office, purple sparks occasionally bursting from her hands and trailing behind her.
“Ridiculous and necessary.” Mattie sat on the edge of one armchair and crossed her legs, one foot bouncing up and down.
“It’s a universal truth that bottling everything up is bad for you.” When Cheyenne shook out her hands, another spray of sparks erupted, some of them landing close to the bookshelf against the wall filled with binders and loose papers.
The professor’s foot stopped swinging. “That’s what you were doing. Now you’re releasing. Let it all out.”
“No, I’m not,” the halfling growled. “This is like having to sneeze without being able to.”
“And for…” Mattie glanced at the neon timer she’d conjured midair. “Almost fifteen minutes. At least you keep beating your own records.”
Cheyenne stopped short, spun toward her professor, and nodded. “I’m ready.”
“To keep practicing? Absolutely. The clock’s still running.”
“No, I’m ready to do something. Magic. Training. Let’s go.”
“That’s what you’re doing, Cheyenne. This is—”
“Just stop!” The half-drow spread her arms, and even more sparks flared. “Stop telling me to stay here. If you’re gonna train me, train me. I’m in my angry place. Do your job.”
“Oh, it’s my job now, huh?” Mattie nodded. “If you can pay more than my tenure, we’ll call it official.”
I can, and she knows it. Instead of saying anything about it, Cheyenne cocked her head and released more of her “angry place” into a continuous shower of sparks raining all over the floor. Thin wisps of smoke rose from the carpet. “Teach me how to fight the way I want to. With control.”
Mattie’s eyes widened at her student’s volatile magic. “Okay, okay.” She stood and dusted off her hands. Another few gestures with her fingers made the singed carpet around Cheyenne’s feet hiss within summoned puddles of water. The smoke cleared and filtered into the air. “Good thing I turned off the smoke detectors.”
Cheyenne glanced at the ceiling. “Sorry.”
“Don’t worry about it. So.” The professor stopped in front of the dark-skinned, white-haired, and eager student with drow magic humming through her. “If you want control over your abilities, you need to give it up.”
“Yeah, that didn’t work so well.”
“Right.” Mattie spread her arms and stepped back. “So, what were you trying to do when it didn’t work so well?”
“I was trying to fry the asshole with a gun in his hand.” Cheyenne hissed out a disgusted breath. “I almost had him. I think.”
“You think. Huh. Do you even know what you were thinking?”
“My friend got shot by an orc,” Cheyenne growled. “Was I supposed to be thinking about something else?”
“Yes. You need to think of everything else. And nothing. Got it?”
“Just tell me what to do.”
Narrowing her eyes, Mattie performed another series of gestures, then raised her hand behind her and flicked her wrist. The jar of pens on her desk rattled and floated through the air. It stopped a few feet away. “Put something in the jar.”
“What?”
“In the jar, Cheyenne. A pebble. A hair. Those cute little sparks.”
“Cute?”
“Focus.” Mattie held the halfling’s
gaze and tilted her head. “Put something in the jar.”
Cheyenne’s nostrils flared, and she turned her attention to the floating jar of pens. In one swift motion, her arm came up, and a column of purple and black sparks exploded from her hand. It shot over the jar by two feet and smashed against a framed certification on the back wall. The glass shattered, the frame thumped to the carpet, and the paper certificate burst into flame.
“Okay. Time to call it.” Mattie sent the floating jar back to her desk, then muttered another spell and shot a stream of water onto the burning paper and frame against the wall. “You can come back tomorrow.”
“I’ll try again.” Cheyenne nodded at the professor’s desk, thrumming with energy and a need to get something done. “I can do it.”
“I know you can.”
“So pick up the jar.”
“No. It’s almost four, anyway. I have a life too, believe it or not. And you need to take a break.” Mattie stepped toward the halfling and set a gentle hand on her shoulder. “Time to leave the angry place.”
“Seriously?” The corner of Cheyenne’s mouth twitched. “I don’t need a break. I’ve been standing here getting ready to do something, so let me do something.”
“You’ve done enough.” Mattie removed her hand and glanced at the soaked and charred mess. “Hey, look at that. Seventeen minutes and twenty-one seconds. New record.”
“You’re making me leave because I burned a stupid piece of paper?”
“Burn all my stupid pieces of paper, Cheyenne.” Mattie turned and pointed at the office door. “Tomorrow.”
The sparks in Cheyenne’s hands fizzled out. She took a deep breath and glanced away from the professor. “I can’t leave like this.”
“I guess you’d better figure out how to look like a Goth grad student again, huh? You have as long as it takes for me to pack my things.” With a lifted eyebrow, Mattie turned toward her desk and started piling papers into stacks.
“That’s the part you said you could teach me.”
“We’ll get there.” The professor jammed a stack of binders into her wheeled briefcase and paused. “Try thinking of a happy place instead.”