“Yeah. I just don’t believe what I’m seeing.” He snapped the magnets back on the fridge, and I saw the same look he always managed to give me when he saw right through me, and he was the only one who ever did.
Chapter Ten
“So what are you going to do while we’re at the falls? Are you sure you don’t want to come with us?” I asked Jake, and he glanced at Kyle with a wry grin on his face.
“No, I’ve got some business I want to take care of.” He glanced at the small airport office and brought his attention back to me.
“Business in Silver Ridge?” I propped my hand on my hip.
Jake flew us over Silver Ridge. The small town sat nestled in a valley between snowcapped mountains. Similar to the islands, the place felt far away from the world.
“More errands than business, I suppose. Jewels tracked down a few first editions she wants from the local bookstore here, so I thought I might as well pick them up since I’m here.”
“For a woman who surrounds herself with books, I still get the feeling she never has enough.” Jewels was the head librarian at the Fireweed Library, and she ran a blog about books and life in general since one seemed to tie so closely to the other.
“Your feeling is right. She never does have enough.” Jake smiled as if merely mentioning Jewels made his world right.
“Do you need a ride?” I asked and Kyle laughed. Kyle’s brother, Joel, had dropped off a car at the airport for us to get to the falls.
“Anything to not be alone with me, huh?” Kyle laughed.
I ignored Kyle’s comment and stared at Jake.
“Nope. I rented that beauty over there.” Jake pointed at a 1970’s Ford Truck with peeling blue paint.
“How many books did Jewels reserve?” My brow arched.
“It was all they had available on such short notice.” Jake gave a quick wave, and I followed Kyle to his brother’s SUV, not buying his story.
“Guess it pays to have friends in high places,” I muttered as we came up to the silver Jeep Wrangler.
Kyle opened the passenger door for me and I climbed in.
“Thank you.”
“Absolutely.” He shut the door, and I closed my eyes, hoping all the earlier emotions didn’t come rushing back.
I needed to stay levelheaded, grounded, and guarded. I managed to keep all the pesky thoughts away during the chopper ride by staring out the window and refusing to look in Kyle’s direction.
“We need to stop off at the deli so I can pick up our lunch, and then we’ll be off to the falls,” Kyle said as he climbed in.
The moment he shut the door all my wishes flew out the window. He looked over at me and gave a half nod as my heart squeezed. Every look in my direction seemed to be filled with something I refused to believe I saw.
“Sound good?” he asked.
“Having food available always sounds perfect.” I adjusted my seatbelt and looked out the window, as the outside quickly became a blur.
“So, are you going to confess about the owls, clowns, and doilies in your apartment?” he asked, sliding a glance in my direction as we started into town.
“Nothing to confess.” I smiled, admiring the small town.
Each of the black old-fashioned light posts leading into town had hanging flower baskets in beautiful purples and reds, and hot pink flowers overfilled small pots on the sidewalk. A blue and white striped awning stuck out from a building with patio tables and chairs housed underneath. Several outdoor heaters lined the sidewalk.
“I have eclectic taste.”
“Best breakfast place in town.” Kyle pointed to where I was staring. “I didn’t even think about it, but you’ve never seen where I grew up. I always came to Colorado for the summer, but you never got a chance to come this way.”
“It’s so beautiful here, I can’t imagine why you kept coming to Colorado.”
“You don’t have any idea?” he asked, pulling over to park in front of another café.
“Should I?”
He turned off the ignition, unbuckled, and turned to face me. “I came because you were there.”
“You were visiting my cousins,” I corrected, shaking my head, unwilling to give him such a handy excuse.
“Sure. That first summer…” He smiled, and I literally felt my insides melt.
Why did he have to be the one who undid me?
“But after that, I came to see you. I had a lot of friends here, but being with you was so effortless. After every day came to an end, I always felt better about myself just from being around you.”
I’d always felt the same.
“Anyway, that’s why I always came back to Colorado, and my brothers stayed back in Washington.”
“Except for that last summer.” The words tumbled out and I looked away. “They came to Colorado with you.”
Bringing back the past held such a mixture of heaviness and happiness that I could barely breathe. I wanted to think about the good times without remembering the bad, but that wasn’t how my mind worked.
“Except for then,” he agreed and climbed out of the Jeep. “Wanna come in while I pick up our picnic basket?”
“Sure. Food is always the perfect distraction.” I hopped out of the Jeep and followed Kyle to the café. I glanced down the sidewalk and saw pot after pot filled with red geraniums and purple petunias dotting as far as my eye could see. “Little gutsy to have flowers out like that so early.”
“What can I say? Silver Ridge is all about living on the edge.” He ushered me inside, and I was taken aback at how darling this place was decorated.
Every wall had been covered in reclaimed wood, the benches were made out of old milk crates and scrap wood, the tables were topped with exposed granite, and the shelves on the wall all looked like Paul Bunyan had hauled them out of the woods himself, and even the display cooler fit perfectly in with everything.
“Your favorite customer is here,” Kyle called into the café.
“Hey, Kyle,” a perky, female voice called from the corner.
“Look at that. She didn’t even have to see me to know who her favorite is.”
I looked around but couldn’t find the source of the chipper voice, until she popped up from under the cabinet.
Her hazel eyes fell right on me, and she smiled as if she already knew me.
“You must be Brooke,” she said, coming around the counter.
Her grey hair was rolled into a braided bun and her delicate hand clasped mine.
“It’s so good to finally meet you.” She glanced at Kyle, who looked somewhat horrified, but she didn’t seem to catch on and continued to shake my hand. “There isn’t a week that goes by where I don’t hear something about you.”
My stomach clenched at the revelation. We’d only reacquainted ourselves a few weeks ago so I wasn’t sure what she was talking about. Maybe she just got me mixed up with one of his other female friends. I bristled at the notion but smiled.
“Grandma Martha tends to exaggerate. Her doctors tell us it’s normal for a woman her age.” Kyle flashed a coy smile and hugged his grandma as she clubbed him on the back of his head.
“Enough with the age jokes or you’ll get something funny sprinkled in your sandwiches next time.” She turned away, walked behind the counter, and opened a fridge I hadn’t even noticed. Without any effort, she grabbed a large cooler and plunked it on the counter.
“Everything you ordered.” She let out a sigh. “I hope you two have a great time at the falls. It’s always beautiful this time of year as the snow’s melting.”
Grandma Martha handed me a cookie, larger than my hand, wrapped in plastic wrap. “To keep you going until you get there.”
“Thank you. It looks amazing.” I sniffed the cookie. “Peanut butter?”
“It sure is.” She smiled and took in a deep breath. “One of my grandmother’s recipes. She’s the one who opened this café decades ago. Not that you’d know that by the décor thanks to Kyle. We freshened it up a bit, b
ut folks keep coming back for the pies. I’ve got two pecan slices for you.”
I glanced at him and saw nothing short of bashfulness dart across his expression.
“You did all this?” I asked, admiring the place even more.
“Yup. It only took a few weeks and a lot less work than trying to put a cabin back together.”
“He was always fond of Lincoln Logs. I never assumed he’d run with it, but I’m glad he did.” She winked as the phone rang and Kyle grabbed the cooler.
He looked like he wanted to get out of here before his grandmother revealed anything else earth-shattering.
Clutching my cookie, I jogged to the door and opened it, so Kyle could get through without a hassle. The moment the door swung shut, I unwrapped the cookie, took a bite, and just couldn’t resist.
“So Grandma Martha hears about me every week?” My brow arched as Kyle balanced the cooler on his knee while he opened the back of the Jeep.
“Only since you moved to Washington.” He slid the cooler in the back and shut the door and closed the window. “Don’t let it go to your head.”
“Curious.” I smiled, taking another bite of the cookie. “What kinds of things do you say?”
“Maybe someday, I’ll tell you.”
I turned on my heels and glanced back toward the café where I saw Grandma Martha watching us. She gave a wave as I climbed into the Wrangler and I smiled, holding up the last bit of the cookie as a thank you.
As we continued down the road, I stayed quiet looking at all the colorful storefronts. A tiny grooming shop sat on the corner where a large statue of a Mastiff kept guard at the bright yellow door. Down from the dog salon was a bakery with a bright blue door, and across the street was an ice cream parlor with a crimson red door. Several families had gathered outside enjoying cones and shakes. Not a bad way to start off a Saturday.
I spotted a bookstore that took up half the block and wondered if that was where Jake was headed.
“This block is certainly colorful.”
“The people living here are even more lively than the paint colors.” He shook his head and turned onto a narrow road leading away from the heart of Silver Ridge. “For the most part, it was a great place to grow up.”
“What made it not so great?”
“The gossip.” He brought in a deep breath. “Although most seems to be pretty accurate, which means the towns’ sources have to be pretty reliable.”
“Tell me about it.” I threw him a funny look. “I was quite surprised to find out just how much my friends already knew about us.”
“Is that so?”
“Very so.” I tucked my leg underneath and turned to see him, which was a mistake. His side profile was as striking as his front. “It was really nice of you to talk Billy into delivering my favorite.”
“I wanted to make it up to you after the drive to Oregon and your girls’ weekend gone awry.”
“Don’t feel too awful about that.” I touched my cheeks. “My skin feels fabulous, and I didn’t put on a pound even after eating all that food.”
“Then the plastic wrap must have worked.”
“Must have.” I grinned and wondered how things could feel this easy with him after so many years had gone by. It never felt like this with anyone, male or female, that I’d befriended over the years.
“Hold on tight,” Kyle warned. “I’ll take it slow, but with the surprise snow we had, it’s awfully muddy and rocky.”
He pulled onto a narrow, gravel road where Douglas firs scratched the top of the Jeep and the bumps threw me out of the seat.
“This is exciting,” I said, holding the grab bar in front of me as Kyle navigated our way deeper into the forest. “We should go four-wheeling sometime.”
It slipped out before I had a chance to even think about what came flying out of my loose lips.
“Yeah. Maybe this summer.” He glanced at me, and I caught a glimmer of hope cast behind his gaze, and I realized I had to somehow, tactfully, extinguish it. “But you’d have to wear all the gear, helmet included.”
The narrow road opened into a wide gravel parking lot with large conifers buffering the edge. He found a spot to park next to the Welcome sign.
“Are you serious? A helmet inside a Jeep?” I tapped the roll cage above my head. “It’s got one of these. I’ll be fine.”
“Unless you fly out.”
“What kind of wheeling do you plan on doing?”
“The fun kind.” He grinned. “But I’m not kidding. Helmet or we won’t go.”
His protectiveness didn’t gently simmer under the surface. It roared to life as he turned his gaze on me.
“It’s not your job to protect me.”
He locked up the Jeep and handed me a water bottle. “That’s where you’re wrong, Brooke. I’ve spent my life protecting you.”
Chapter Eleven
Kyle’s words slammed into me like a semitruck. I didn’t say a word as I followed him up the narrow trail. Clutching my water bottle, all the things I wanted to say scattered to the wind with each step forward.
My mouth went dry, and my throat clenched as so many emotions came crashing down around me. I wanted that same relationship back. I wanted him to be the one who never stopped protecting me from the ugliness of the world, but that ended the moment he left and never returned.
Kyle stopped protecting me from the bitterness of the world and showed me what the world could do to me if I let it.
He’d always been my hero. The guy I could count on growing up to make things better, and then he suddenly made them worse, and instead of letting myself feel what that heartache truly felt like, I buried the emotions and pretended to be someone I wasn’t.
My world became one of superficial relationships and isolation so I could be in charge of how I felt. The moment I realized I wasn’t going to hear from Kyle again was the moment in my life when I decided I’d never let another person hurt me like that again.
The more I thought about him trouncing in front of me as if he was Brooke Sahler’s savior, the angrier I got until I just couldn’t stay quiet any longer.
“North, you’re sadly mistaken if you think you’ve been protecting me my entire life.” I stopped walking and waited for him to turn around before I continued. “A person would have to be part of my life in order to protect me from anything. You might have tricked me into thinking you held the role of defender when I was a kid, but you lost that right the moment you left with no intention of returning.”
“I had every intention of returning.” His eyes stayed steady on mine. “But I needed to wait until the time was right.”
“Doesn’t cut it though.” I shook my head. “Meaning to do something is a lot different than actually doing it. Good intentions don’t mend broken hearts. It’s been years, Kyle. I skipped, hopped, and jumped into being an adult about a decade ago and you weren’t around.”
“I can’t dispute that, and it kills me to know I broke your heart,” Kyle said, softly.
“It’s my own fault for believing all the things you said when we were teenagers.” I pushed down the rawness in my throat. I refused to cry in front of him. “I mean, we were just teenagers, right?”
I hated feeling like I was sixteen again, giving credit to feelings that were so visceral and alive with emotion.
Kyle took a few steps down the trail to me. “We weren’t just teenagers, Brooke. You were my world. I worshipped you and could think of nothing but you. I saw a life for us, and then I screwed up, and I knew there was no coming back from it. To protect you, I had to stay away.”
“Don’t pull that card.” I shook my head. “There’s no reason in the world why I shouldn’t have gotten a call or a letter or a message sent through my cousins.”
“You’re right. I know that now, but it’s too late.” He held out his hand to me and against every logical sentiment in my head, I reached for it and felt his fingers lace through mine. “I can’t change the past, and truthfully, I wouldn’t w
ant to.”
His words stung, and my eyes fell to the ground.
That was not what I was expecting to hear.
I bit my lip hard to keep the tears from welling up.
Why would he bring me here to tell me he wouldn’t change the past at the same time he wanted me to believe he’d spent his life protecting me?
He tugged on my hands, and I lifted my eyes to meet his.
“If you’d let me explain, it will make more sense.” He shook his head. “In fact, I can’t wait for you to come to grips or for you to groom the perfect moment to hear what I have to tell you. There will be no right time. I know that about you.” His voice was raw with emotion, and I went to object, but he squeezed my hand, nearly pulling me up the trail without saying a word.
I heard the falls pouring ahead, and my pulse raced with possibilities. I could see it in his eyes. There was no stopping Kyle from telling me whatever he felt necessary to get off his chest.
The same determination I loved as a girl was now threatening my own sanity. My love life had always been simple without any complexity, and that was precisely how I wanted it to stay.
The mere fact that he could cause such upheaval in my life off of quick glances and scarce apologies told me this was the last time I could see him. It didn’t matter what he was about to tell me.
It never would. I’d made up my mind the moment I saw him a few weekends ago. I’d hear him out, and then I’d figure out a way to move on without another thought about Kyle North.
As we came to the first lookout point for Silver Falls, my breath caught from the overall power that nature had behind it to create such turbulent waters. The force behind the melting snow pack created a beautiful sight, but behind the thin veil of mist, it was hard not to be frightened about the thrashing waters behind.
All it would take was one misstep to go tumbling into the icy, roaring falls. The thin, green metal rail meant to keep hikers away from the edge would do nothing if a hiker actually tripped and slid right under.
I shivered at the notion and looked away.
Irresistible Love at Silver Falls (Island County Series Book 7) Page 9