Linda Goodman's Sun Signs

by Linda Goodman

  Never pry into Scorpio’s private affairs. He will not tolerate that. If he likes you and his job, he’ll be generous and fair. He’ll give you eight hours work for eight hours pay, and he won’t watch the clock if the project holds his interest. But remember that he will always be firmly committed to his own code and ideas. He will be true to them above all other loyalties, including love and ambition. No one but himself can force him to alter his views and opinions. It has to be done through Pluto power, from inside his own nature. If his decision is negative, no one on the face of this earth can slam the door more suddenly or more permanently than a Scorpio, even a door bearing the title Vice-President in gold-leaf letters. He’ll take just so much, pay just so high a price. When he thinks the cost is too much, he leaves. That’s the way he plays the game. His real loyalty, when all is said and done, is to himself. That’s not always as selfish as it sounds. When he was very young, his favorite verse began: “This above all: to thine own self be true.” He’s always figured—if he does that—he can’t be false to anyone.

  SAGITTARIUS the Archer

  November 23rd through December 21st

  “You may charge me with murder—

  or want of sense

  (We are all of us weak at times):

  But the slightest approach to a false pretence was never among my crimes!”

  How to Recognize SAGITTARIUS

  “I should see the garden far better …

  If I could get to the top of that hill:

  and here’s a path that leads straight to it—

  at least; no, it doesn’t do that …

  But I suppose it will at last.

  But how curiously it twists! …

  Well then, I’ll try the other way.”

  I would say that finding an example of this Sun sign is as easy as rolling off a log, except that it isn’t true. It’s much easier than rolling off a log. Pick any party and look at the center of the liveliest group. See that fellow sitting there happily with his rather large foot stuck in his mouth? He’s a Sagittarian who has just gone out on a verbal limb, but he doesn’t know it yet. When he does, he’ll look slightly bewildered—and the group around him will be looking daggers.

  The archer will walk up to you, give you a hearty slap on the back and a wide, friendly grin. Then he’ll greet you with a remark like, “How the heck do you manage to look so young when you’re as old as you are?” Or “Say, that turtleneck sweater sure is flattering. You should wear them all the time. Hides your double chin.” After one of these cheery openers, he’ll still be wearing his bright grin, but your own smile may start to droop a little. It will take him a while to figure out just what he said that set you back on your heels, and even longer to understand why. Then he’ll try to explain. Keep your cool. It gets worse.

  Golly, didn’t you understand what he meant? He thinks it’s fabulous to look only twenty-five years old when you’re really thirty-eight (which is six years older than you actually are). As for the double chin, lots of people your age have a little flab in the neck region. The only time you can see it is from the side. You know, when you turn your head. Just don’t have any pictures taken in profile.

  After he’s carefully explained his verbal goofs and got you feeling all better again, he’ll go on his merry way, whistling a tune from the latest Broadway show. When you cut him dead the next time you meet, he’ll be heartbroken—and puzzled. There’s no use getting angry or embarrassed. Sagittarius is completely free of malice. He blurts out his shockingly direct speech in total innocence. The fact that he usually adds insult to injury when he tries to fix it also escapes him. Don’t judge him too harshly. He means well. Not that he needs your sympathy—or mine. Under his tactless manner is an extremely clever mind and high standards. His unique combination of wit, intelligence and fiery drive usually brings the archer straight to the winner’s circle. What really gets you is that both male and female Sagittarians are oblivious to their own blunt speech. They are truly convinced that they are the most diplomatic souls in the world. They’re always saying, “Why, I wouldn’t hurt anyone’s feelings for anything. I’m very careful about that.” And they honestly believe it. In fact, everything they do is done honestly. Pretense and deception in any form appalls them.

  Their physical characteristics aren’t hard to learn. Look for a fairly large, well-shaped skull and a high, broad forehead. The features will be open and cheerful, inviting friendship and the exchange of ideas, and the movements will normally be rapid (though you’ll find a few who move slowly and deliberately). They will often make wide, sweeping gestures, which may be dramatic and vigorous, but possibly not very graceful. Sagittarius can wave his arms to make a point, and upset the ketchup. He’ll stride purposefully forward, head high, and trip over the curbstone. His brief case may snap open at the same time, scattering his papers all over the street.

  Jupiter eyes are as bright and alert as a sparrow’s, and they sparkle and twinkle with refreshing humor. The archers are either very tall and athletic looking or shorter than average, with strong, sturdy bodies. The tall ones will remind you of thoroughbred horses or spirited colts. In youth especially, many of them have a stray lock of hair which keeps falling over the forehead, like a horse’s mane. They’ll flip it back with a toss of the head or a quick, unconscious movement of the hand—a habit that may last long after a new hairstyle has been adopted in maturity or after baldness has set in.

  Sagittarians are normally restless. They hate to sit or stand still. The archer is physically conspicuous, if only through his obvious confidence and his disregard for conventional behavior. He walks as if he’s really going somewhere. There’s no halting or hesitating. (But remember that a conflicting ascendant can slow down the gait.)

  When you first meet him, Sagittarius could be perched on a horse or walking his dog. He loves animals passionately. Sagittarian Frank Sinatra once ordered his driver to stop his car when he saw an injured dog lying in the street. He was on his way to a television rehearsal, but musicians, director and camera crew had to wait until the singer had tenderly carried the dog to a vet, was assured he would be fine in a few days, and had found the dog’s owner.

  Sagittarians with natal afflictions to the birth planets can have, instead, a morbid fear of animals, but it doesn’t happen often. Ordinarily, people born under Jupiter’s influence fear nothing. The typical Sagittarian is attracted to danger—in sports and in his job or his hobby. An element of risk excites and challenges the archers. They love speed. Fast cars, planes—even roller coasters draw them magnetically. Daredevil test pilots are often Sagittarians. The average Jupiter person enjoys nothing more than a hairbreadth escape of some kind—either physical or emotional. It exhilarates them. They’ll take a chance on literally anything (unless a meeker sign on the ascendant dilutes Jupiter’s daring).

  There’s a difference between the legendary bluntness of the archer and the brutal speech of the Scorpio. Scorpio tells the truth, completely conscious of its effect, but still refusing to compromise. Sagittarius is totally unaware of the effect when his direct honesty compels him to speak. Scorpio feels little compunction about the wounds his statements cause. To him, the truth is the truth, and if you can’t bear to hear it, don’t ask. The Jupiter person, on the other hand, is crushed and dismayed at his own lack of discretion when he discovers he’s really cut you. It would be touching, if it weren’t so infuriating.

  What is on the archer’s mind and heart is almost instantly on his lips. He’s as frank and earnest as a six-year-old. You can take that old advice, “If you want the truth, go to a child,” and switch it to “If you want the truth, go to a Sagittarian.”

  There’s a woman in the publishing business in New York about whom the same thing is said. “If you want the truth, go to Kay—if you can stand it.” Kay is not only an authentic archer, she also has additional Sagittarius influences in her natal chart. A Jupiter girl plus, you might say. She’s warm and generous, typical of the sign, and she has l
ots of loyal friends who love her, also typical of the sign. They would have to be loyal, and they would have to love her to survive incidents like the time three years ago when she opened up her big heart and decided to completely outfit her administrative assistant for the winter. The young woman was flat broke, since she had just been through a drizzly financial disaster, and she was touched to tears. Others had sympathized, but until Kay, no one had offered a concrete helping hand. Leave it to Sagittarius. (You can read that several ways.)

  One fine fall day, the two of them set forth for Saks Fifth Avenue in a fever of excited anticipation. The poor assistant was delirious with happiness—until they entered the elevator. Suddenly, the Sagittarian gave her a long, appraising look, and said quite firmly and quite loudly, “We’d better try the Fat Girl’s Department first.”

  Blind ecstasy was instantly replaced by numb shock. The assistant’s fiancé had always told her she was “pleasingly plump.” Now, in one flashing painful moment of Sagittarian honesty, she had become a baby blimp. To this very day, the young woman remembers how everyone in the car turned to stare at her curiously, as she wondered if her fiancé secretly thought she was grotesque. But good old Kay fixed it. Noticing her assistant’s discomfiture, she hastily made a joke to jolly her up. “And if we can’t find anything to fit you there, we can always try the tents in the camping department.” The Sagittarian howled at her own hilarity. So did the people in the elevator.

  Just after Kay’s warm, generous excursion with her assistant, she cheered up her boss, the publisher, who had been on doctor’s orders not to drink for a year. One solid year. He had had infectious hepatitis. No liquor, Not one drop. After going for twelve long months without even wetting his lips, he was justifiably proud of his will power. Kay just freshly back from Europe, paid him a typical Sagittarian compliment. “About your drinking,” she began, and he smiled, waiting. “I hear you’ve been trying to stay on the wagon.” Trying? After twelve months without a single drop? Trying? As he recovered his composure, she went on. “Say, you know there’s a party tomorrow night for Joe’s book? I thought I ought to warn you, but I never get to see you alone.” Warn him? Warn him about what? The publisher forgot his chagrin under this new threat. She continued: “We were all hoping that, well, this is embarrassing—but we were all hoping that you wouldn’t spoil the party.” By now, the publisher was speechless. Not Sagittarius.

  “What I mean is, we hope you don’t mess up the evening by being a wet blanket about not drinking—and all that. Joe likes his martinis, and after all, his book is a Literary Guild selection. If you slink around like some fugitive from prohibition and make everybody miserable, just because you have this terrible disease, it will throw a damper on the whole thing. Say, can people catch it from being in the same room with you?”

  The publisher somehow managed to stammer that she was safe, then gathered his injured dignity together long enough to remind her that he had hosted parties himself for authors like Edna Ferber and Ernest Hemingway without mishap. “I have always been told,” he said evenly, between clenched teeth, “that my manners are impeccable.” The Sagittarian, blind to her boss’s near apoplexy, heartily agreed with him. “That’s for sure. You’re a fabulous host. No one in the publishing business can figure it out.” The publisher had just barely enough breath left to ask, Figure what out? The archer’s answer zinged home. “How is it that you can be such a great host and such a perfectly lousy guest? Your own parties are marvelous, but you always pull such big boo-boos every time you go to somebody else’s whing-ding. It’s really weird.”

  Then she noticed something else weird. Her boss’s face. It was turning purple. Suddenly contrite, the friendly Sagittarian immediately apologized. “Gee, I hope I didn’t say the wrong thing. It won’t matter how you behave anyway. Joe thinks you’re really swell. He was just telling us all today that he’s glad he decided to come to us even though his old agent had been against it. He can’t understand why he’s heard such awful things about you. I told him people were just jealous. Say, you don’t look so hot. Are you sure your doctor knows what he’s doing?” (There are rumors that Kay’s boss went off the wagon that night, permanently.) The Sagittarian? Oh, she’s happily helping new authors get over their nervousness at the same publishing company. Fired? He wouldn’t dare fire her. As I said in the beginning, everybody loves her.

  Few people can resent the archer for very long, because he’s so transparently free of harmful intent. You’ll see this lovable, likable, intelligent idealist almost anywhere or any time. You may catch him shooting out his careless arrows from your television screen some Sunday night, leaving his guest stars numb and speechless with astonishment at his frankness. He may be your cab driver some Monday morning, the one who cheerfully explains to you why he hates stingy tippers—or you could find him serving you in a restaurant some Friday evening, earnestly advising you not to order the oysters because they’re a little on the tired side.

  Most archers sincerely try to cheer you up. At least, that’s what they start out to do, but sometimes it falls a little short of the good intention. I once had a Sagittarius manager who tried to boost my morale by telling me how much better my hair looked than it usually did when I hadn’t washed it or rolled it up for more than a week. But he’s still a good friend, so you can see it’s useless to get exasperated. Besides, now and then Sagittarians can come up with a dilly of a statement that sends your spirits really soaring, and makes up for all the rest. They can offer profoundly wise counsel, when you’ve had time to analyze their viewpoints. This is a fire sign, so most archers are extroverts, talkative and forward. There are a few who are painfully shy and timid, but even these are full of original ideas—and they’re just as blunt. In fact, the quiet, fey Sagittarians with the reclusive, meek ways, can dream the biggest dreams and aim for the highest goals. Introvert or extrovert, the archer is a promoter at heart. The rare one who doesn’t say much could be planning something really spectacular to spring on an unsuspecting world. His mind is busy even when his tongue is still, so you have to remember his Sun sign is always there at the bottom of his nature, lest he lull you into not being prepared for his next startling move.

  Most of the time the typical Sagittarian is happy and gregarious, but his temper can flare like a sky rocket if he’s pushed around by people who abuse his natural friendliness or who get too familiar. Rebellion against authority and stuffy society is also common. Sagittarius will never run away from a fight or call for help. The women can lose their normally pleasant dispositions and let go with a barrage of unexpected plain talk that puts troublemakers right where they belong. The men will use their fists and scorn weapons. A rude, insulting person who has challenged Jupiter’s good nature often finds himself sprawled on the sidewalk wondering where that truck came from.

  High-spirited Jupiter people can’t stand to be accused of dishonesty. An unjust accusation or a slur against their integrity will make righteous indignation flame high, but after an especially fiery display of temper, the typical Sagittarian will feel remorse and try to make amends. He’ll black your eye and put you in the hospital, but he’ll probably shower you with flowers and sympathy the next day. The archer usually speaks and acts first, and considers the consequences later.

  Many Sagittarians seek the stage, and no one is happier giving encore after encore for an excited audience. He’ll sing himself hoarse or dance his shoes off for the sheer exhilaration of performing. Show business is full of archers.

  There’s a strong religious streak in Jupiter men and women, especially in their youth. They’re intensely interested in church affairs, but as they grow older they can become skeptical of dogma, inclined to question former faiths and search for a perfection of values. It’s a rare Sagittarian who doesn’t have a matched set of luggage. They love to travel, and there’s usually at least one suitcase, well worn from hundreds of trips, that’s kept packed and ready for instant use.

  You’ll always notice something child-l
ike about the typical naive, brave, optimistic Sagittarian. He refuses to accept the seriousness of life, though some of them manage responsibility with admirable conscientiousness in later years. Still, they’re never truly happy when they’re burdened by it. Jupiter natures rebel against confinement, and too much of it can bring on serious illness. If the Sagittarian can survive that, and the wear and tear of scattering his energies, he’ll live to be as old as Methuselah. Most archers retain their faculties, razor sharp and refined by age, to the end. Senility is almost never a problem.

  His sensitive areas are the hips, lungs, liver, arms, hands, shoulders, intestines and feet. The Sagittarian love of sports and the outdoors may bring accidents through reckless over-activity. Hospitals can rarely keep him bedded down more than a few days. He gives in to sickness reluctantly, and usually recuperates with amazing swiftness. Life seldom defeats these people permanently. They believe that tomorrow will surely be better than yesterday, and today is pretty interesting. Moody spells are gone almost before the clouds have a chance to obscure the sunshine.

  Every Sagittarian is something of a gambler, unless there’s a cautious, conservative influence in the natal chart. Very few of them can resist throwing a couple of bills on the green felt. The sound of dice rattling in the dealer’s hand attracts some Jupiter men and women like the siren song of Circe. With adverse aspects between the planets at birth, an archer can gamble away a fortune, or throw the rent money on the nose of a favorite horse. Las Vegas attracts Sagittarians like sugar attracts flies. So do the more staid gambles of the stock market and real estate. Fortunately, the majority of them keep the urge to speculate under control, but even these will risk a few dollars now and then on a fast poker game or a lottery ticket.