by Barbara Lohr
Now she’d had no word from her parents about tomorrow and didn’t have the nerve to call them. Her father was being weird about the whole adoption thing and maybe that was the problem. The last time she talked to her mother on the phone, Amanda could hear him in the background. “Who gives their kid up for adoption? The mother’s probably on drugs.” Her dad had never been known for his tact. Still, the words stung.
After he sold his business, her parents had headed south. They hadn’t seen the day-to-day struggles Connor and Amanda went through trying to have a family. Connor’s mom said they were losing their smiles. Amanda couldn’t deny the stress had taken a toll.
She slogged her way around the corner and the wind blasted her full force. But her in-laws’ house lay just ahead. McKenna’s orange jeep sat out front, mounded with snow. Amanda trudged on. At least the walk was shoveled and someone had salted the front steps. When Amanda got to the top, she stomped her boots on the mat with Christmas elves. Music blared from inside the red brick bungalow—“White Christmas,” no less. Well, they’d sure have that. Pushing open the front door, she sniffed the aroma of corned beef and cabbage, along with the pine from the Douglas fir in the corner. The Kirkpatricks had never succumbed to artificial trees and were darn proud of it. The sudden onslaught of warmth stung her cheeks and ears.
Plenty of Christmas spirit in this house. Greenery and ornaments hung everywhere, from the mantel to the handrail that led upstairs. The stockings attached to that banister numbered the seven children and their spouses, as well as their children. Santa would be busy.
Would their baby’s stocking hang in this cluster next year? The warmth curling in her stomach cooled. “Hello! Anybody home?”
“Amanda!” McKenna rushed into the hall from the kitchen. In four steps her sister-in-law had enveloped her in a fierce hug. “Where have you been, lady? We were getting worried. Oh, your cheeks are cold.”
“I got stuck. Do you believe it?” Breaking the sisterly embrace, Amanda shrugged out of her coat, hung it on the coat tree and kicked off her boots. She owed so much to her sister-in-law. Their hopes for a baby had dimmed until McKenna became involved. Angie had been a student in McKenna’s natural childbirth class. “The car’s sitting over on a side street about six blocks away. Connor will kill me.”
“Amanda! You’re here! We were worried.” Auburn hair flying, Harper threw herself into the group hug.
Youngest of the family, Harper looked different, her long locks cut into a shoulder-length style. Amanda pulled away to get a better look. “Every time I see you, you’re more beautiful. You’ve grown up! Savannah must agree with you.”
Pulling away, Connor’s youngest sister blushed. “Guess so.”
“Oh, I think it’s more than just that southern air, my dear,” McKenna drawled in a ridiculous southern accent. Harper had gone to school in Savannah, staying for a stint as a nanny when she couldn’t find another job. Cameron Bennett had started as her employer, but ended up being so much more.
“Is Cameron coming for Christmas?” Amanda couldn’t wait to meet him.
“Yep, he’ll be here.” The flush in Harper’s porcelain skin deepened.
Connor’s two sisters were knockouts. The entire family had that auburn hair in a range of shades, all of them striking. Their eye color differed too, since Maureen had green eyes and Big Mike, as Connor’s father was known, had brown eyes. Amanda had always loved Connor’s brown suede eyes, soft but sensual.
She shivered and brought her attention back to Harper. “Is Cameron bringing his little girl with him?”
“Of course. Here only two days and I miss them both like crazy.”
“You don’t come home to Chicago enough, Harper.” Maureen bustled down the hall, wiping her hands on her green checked apron. “You should persuade that man to move here, the way Mallory did after he married Amy.” Amy was one of McKenna’s close friends. She’d met a man from Savannah, who eventually bought a home in Oak Park so it would be easy to visit her folks.
“Mallory’s move was temporary. Cameron’s work is in Savannah, Mom. And now mine is too.” Harper swung one arm across Amanda’s shoulders. “Besides, there are already way too many Kirkpatricks up in the Windy City. We have to spread out.”
Maureen gave Amanda a sound kiss on the cheek. “This is your party, mother-to-be, but you certainly didn’t have to come out on a day like this.”
“Oh, I wanted to be here to help!” Amanda had been dreaming of this baby shower for a long time. Was this a miracle or what? “Looks like you’ve outdone yourself with the decorations.”
Blue crepe paper twirled in long loops around the living room, including the Christmas tree. A large stork commanded the front window, with blue paper baby booties set on every flat surface.
Such outrageous flaunting. Uneasiness tempered Amanda’s excitement.
“Beautiful, isn’t it?” Harper gave her one more hug and then went back to decorating.
But McKenna pinned Amanda with one of her x-ray looks. “Anything wrong?”
So it showed? “Just tired, I guess. Be glad when Christmas break starts.”
“When is your last class?”
“Tuesday and I can’t wait. The kids are bouncing off the walls.”
“Sophomores will do it to you every time.” McKenna adjusted a crepe paper streamer and stood back to admire her handiwork.
“Can you blame them?” Amanda ran her fingers over the prickly pine boughs. “Only two more days of school and we’re all free.”
“What book are they reading?” Harper asked.
“To Kill a Mockingbird.”
“Whoa! Not exactly holiday reading!” Harper laughed.
Her sister-in-law was right. “Guess I was just too preoccupied. We should have read the Great Christmas Pageant or something more fun.”
“You have a lot to be preoccupied about.” McKenna gave her a meaningful look. She knew more about their efforts than the rest of the family. Connor was intensely private about this kind of stuff, and they hadn’t shared many details. “Good thing you’re taking a maternity leave after Christmas. Are you going back when that leave ends?”
The whole family thought the city school was wearing her down. Connor wanted her to get another position in a suburban school but she wasn’t a quitter. She’d never throw in the towel on her inner city kids. “I’ll hang in there. Three months off for my maternity leave and then I’ll go back.”
“Your life’s about to change.”
“It is.” How she wanted to believe that.
“Girls, time to take a break. You’ve been at this since ten this morning.” Maureen bustled in with a tray of Christmas cookies and eggnog. Food was Maureen’s solution for everything.
“I’m watching my weight, Mom. Not that a diet will stop me when it come to your cookies.” McKenna snatched two of the chocolate confetti cookies. Maureen liked to serve them fresh from the oven. Harper was right behind her older sister. But Amanda took a pass. Her stomach had been off. Maybe her mother’s ulcers were hereditary after all.
“Need any help, Mom?” Harper asked between mouthfuls.
“Not really, but I always like to catch up with my youngest daughter. Come and keep me company.” Maureen led the way toward the back and Harper followed.
McKenna sank onto the sofa across from Amanda. “Any word from Angie?”
“We’re supposed to meet with her tomorrow night.”
“Have you been seeing her a lot?”
“Pretty much. It’s as if she wants to make sure that we’re the right couple for her baby. Like she hasn’t really decided yet.”
McKenna frowned. “The timing’s just not right for Angie. She’s so young and couldn’t support a child. Are you really worried about her backing out?”
“I’ve read about it happening.” Tears prickled. Amanda concentrated on counting the ornaments so she wouldn't cry. She’d been so emotional lately.
“You’re going to have to trust her. I think s
he knows what she’s doing.”
“She’s so skinny. I want to buy that girl groceries every time I see her. Is she eating enough vegetables?”
McKenna laughed. “Are you forgetting the raging metabolisms of girls under twenty? Sherry Barry, our nutritionist, is taking care of the diet in our natural childbirth class. Believe it or not, Angie has filled out quite a bit since I first met her last summer.”
Amanda’s shoulders loosened a bit. “Good to know.”
Reaching over, McKenna squeezed her hand. “Can’t blame you for not feeling sure of this whole thing yet, but I don’t see any red flags. Aren’t you working with Logan on that other option?”
McKenna’s boyfriend, Dr. Logan Castle, was a fertility expert who specialized in the in vitro maturation process. They were both on staff of the obstetrics department of Montclair Specialty Hospital downtown. Amanda and Connor had been working with him, but they hadn’t shared much about that. After so many procedures that had not worked, they’d decided not to keep the family updated.
“We are working with him, but there’s only about a thirty percent success rate. Even less as you age. At least I’m not on those fertility drugs anymore. They made me feel so weird. Logan’s had great success. Let’s just leave it at that.”
“You’re right. There’s always a failure rate. Still…”
“I just don’t want to count on anything, McKenna. Hopefully this thing with Angie will go without a hitch.”
Her sister-in-law’s eyes swept the room and she erupted into laughter. “Well, you better count on something, lady. We didn’t plan this party and get that baby’s room ready to have it sit empty.”
The nursery. Amanda turned to mush every time she even thought about it. “Oh, it’s so beautiful, McKenna. Sometimes when I get home from school, I go in and sit in the rocking chair just to look at those peaceful blue-sky walls with the puffy white clouds. It’s just so relaxing. And the animals Harper added peeking from the clouds? Beyond beautiful.”
“And pretty soon, you’ll be sitting there rocking that new baby.” McKenna’s world always had a blue sky. Amanda loved that about her sister-in-law.
“You’re staying for dinner, Amanda, right?’ Maureen popped her head back in the living room. “No sense going home.”
“That would be great.” She wasn’t eager to go out in the snow again and didn’t know how she’d get home anyhow. “Connor’s working so there’s really no hurry.”
“Great. Harper, set another place.”
After Amanda helped pin up a few more crepe paper streamers, the group moved toward the kitchen.
Harper opened the cupboard and began to pull out the plates. “Nothing like coming home to make you feel like the baby sister again.”
McKenna poked her in the ribs. “You are the baby sister. For that, you have always been adored.”
“Are you kidding me? I’ve been your slave.” But Harper smiled.
Amanda loved their constant kidding and teasing. Being an only child thing was something she wouldn’t wish on anyone. She’d lucked out by marrying Connor. Unconditional support and fun were what she wanted for her own family.
If she had one. That if. She couldn’t get it out of her head.
When they sat down for dinner that night, Big Mike sat at the head of the table. Connor’s father was obviously pleased to have more of his seven adult children with him. They all bowed their heads and asked for God’s blessing, although Amanda had a secret prayer in her heart that night.
“Connor working this weekend?” Big Mike asked, passing her the platter of corned beef.
“Yep. The cold seems to bring out a lot of fires.”
A retired fireman himself, her father-in-law gave a nod. “All those damn space heaters. If people would only learn to check worn wires and keep the heaters away from their drapes, we’d all sleep easier.”
“Let’s not talk work tonight, sweetheart. Remember, you’re retired,” Maureen chided her husband, handing him a bowl. “Amanda, I’m going to give you a container of cabbage for Connor.”
While the five of them ate dinner, Harper filled them in about what was happening in Savannah. She’d been doing a lot of design work for Cameron, who redeveloped historic properties. Sounded fascinating. After their personal lives settled down, Amanda hoped they could visit her sister-in-law. But by that time they might have their baby.
Might have. That uncertain shiver rolled through her again.
“I got a whole new set of door knobs your fellow Cameron might like.” Big Mike helped himself to a second serving.
“He’s not my fellow, but awesome. Where’d you pick them up, a swap meet?” Harper’s face brightened. She loved talking about old houses.
“Yep. I was looking at some brass switch plates. You never know when someone in the family might need one.” The basement was stuffed with things the family “might need.”
“You’re never this concerned about the drapes or the bedspreads,” Maureen broke in. “Just anything that requires a hammer or a drill.”
The girls smiled. They all knew what was coming next.
Big Mike never blinked. “Houses are important, Reenie. So I asked this guy if he’d bundle the switch plates with these old doorknobs sitting there in an old shoe box. Done!” He thumped one hand on the table.
“The beauty of bundling.” Maureen gave her husband a look that told him he was brilliant.
“You’ve got the talent, Dad. That’s for sure. Now, could you pass the corned beef? I’m not quite finished.” McKenna curled her fingers toward the platter.
Outside, the wind had died and big puffy flakes melted against the large picture window. When Maureen brought out the platter of Christmas cookies, Big Mike moved into the family room and turned on the TV.
“No TV during dinner,” his wife reminded him.
“Dinner’s over for me, Reenie. I gotta know what’s going on around the city. Geez, will you look at those tie-ups?”
The TV showed an earlier snarl of traffic from the Edens Expressway to the Eisenhower.
“Poor people,” Maureen clucked. “They won’t be getting home any time soon.”
They settled in front of the TV in the family room, munching cookies and watching the news. Cozy between Harper and McKenna, Amanda could have fallen asleep.
Then McKenna jostled her elbow. “Time to hit the road. Want a ride home, Amanda? My jeep is just about as good as a snowmobile in weather like this.”
“Right, and it’s orange.” Her dad laughed. “No one’s going to run into it by mistake.”
Darkness had fallen by the time they were ready to leave. Amanda gathered her things.
“See you soon, Harper.” She gave her younger sister-in-law a quick hug and assured Maureen and Big Mike they’d be here on time tomorrow for the shower. “I hope everyone can make it.”
“You know any Kirkpatrick who stays home because of a little snow?” Big Mike cracked. “Not gonna happen. Don’t you worry.”
“You look so tired, sweetie,” Maureen whispered when she helped Amanda on with her jacket. “Those students are wearing you out. Go home and get a good night’s sleep, you hear?”
“Right, Mom.” But she couldn’t tell Maureen that a lot of her misery came from arguing with Connor. The overhead light in the hallway detailed every wrinkle on Maureen’s face. Connor and the boys were no doubt responsible for more than a few of them, but Maureen never complained. Was Amanda becoming a whiner? “Um, did you by any chance hear from my parents?”
Maureen shook her head. “No. Not yet.”
Amanda looked away, embarrassed. How could Mom and Dad just ignore the invitation when this baby meant so much to her? The distance her parents were putting into their relationship hurt. “See you tomorrow, okay?”
The cold air slammed her once they got outside. When McKenna yanked open the front door, the jeep squealed in protest. But the engine started right up. Grabbing a brush, Amanda helped sweep off the snow. The temperature h
overed around fifteen degrees and she thought of her own car sitting on that side street overnight. They’d practically have to chip the ice off when they finally got to it Sunday morning.
“The windows are clear enough,” McKenna finally announced. “I’ll blast the defroster and let it do the rest of the work.”
Shivering, Amanda jumped into the front seat. McKenna barreled out of the snow ridge made by the latest plow, and they were on their way. The inside was still far from warm and the two of them shivered. McKenna took the road like she was leading the Nascar pack.
The streets were empty, shrouded in white. “Christmas in Chicago,” McKenna said when they stopped for a light. “I think Harper has the right idea, staying in Savannah.”
“You must miss her.”
The light changed, and McKenna grinned as she plowed through another snowdrift. “I do but I sure enjoy visiting her. That’s the upside.”
So strange to see Harlem Avenue this deserted, without the usual backup of traffic when they came to Lake Street. Chicago had called a snow emergency and everyone was at home unless they had an urgent reason to be out in this mess.
“Are you sure you’ll make it downtown tonight? You could always stay at our place,” Amanda offered, since McKenna lived on the North Shore.
“No problem.” McKenna wore a secret smile.
“Logan’s waiting for you.”
The flush that tinted McKenna’s cheeks was not from the frigid air. “How’d you guess?”
Sometimes it felt creepy to be talking to the woman who dated Amanda’s new fertility specialist, but McKenna had been the one to link her up with both Angie and Logan Castle. “I have so much to thank you for, McKenna.”
“Happy to do it, Amanda. Angie just happened to be in my natural childbirth class. I’d been working with the social worker to get her out of an abusive situation when the issue of her finding a good home for her baby came up. And when I got to know Logan better, I realized he’s had success with his fertility clinic. Another natural match, that’s all. You’ve been patient, that’s for sure.”