When Angels Cry

by Marylu Tyndall

  Of course, more than a decade had passed, and she’d changed a lot herself. She was no longer that dreamy-eyed college girl—thin, bubbly, and looking for a good time. And he was no longer the shy boy who thought he’d never amount to anything. No, he’d become a world-famous pastor with his own kingdom to rule.

  Yet…at what cost? Shock had stiffened her when she’d first seen him, when she’d drawn close and saw the darkness that surrounded him—all shifting shadows and chains. Where there was darkness, there were always chains. But there’d been so many. Perhaps she shouldn’t have been surprised after what she’d read about him, after the few sermons she’d seen him preach on TV. But still, to see him trapped in such thick darkness had jolted her.

  The toast popped, she buttered it, and put in two more slices.

  Regardless, she had delivered the message and her task was done.

  Then why did she feel the Spirit telling her that she had only just begun?

  “No, Father, I can’t.” She transferred the last of the bacon onto a paper towel. “Don’t ask me to.” Still, the pinch in her spirit remained. Maybe it was just the jolt to her emotions, residual feelings she hadn’t yet dealt with. What else could she do for Daniel, anyway? “Okay, Father, if You want me to go see him again, show me his face today.” She smiled, knowing she would not be in a position to see Daniel, either in person or on TV. She would be busy with the kids and errands and chores before she went to work again tonight.

  “Hi, Mom.”

  Angelica looked up and smiled as Isaac entered the living area, dragging his backpack behind him. Dressed in his usual jeans and T-shirt, his hair looked like it had been tossed in a dryer.

  “Bacon!” His eyes lit up as he entered the kitchen. “What for?”

  “’Cause I love you.” She drew him into a hug. His head still fit neatly beneath her chin, but she knew that wouldn’t be the case for very long. He was growing up fast, too fast for her liking.

  “Did you finish your homework last night?”

  “Yeah,” he mumbled. “But it was dumb.” He plopped down in a chair at the table.

  “Why?” Angelica poured eggs into the pan.

  “Dumb stuff they are teaching us in Science. Stuff about aliens from other planets coming here and creating our world.”

  “Hmm.” She grabbed a spoon and stirred the eggs. “But you know better.”

  He nodded. “It’s just hard ’cause I gotta read the book and answer questions. And then take a test.”

  “Just do your best.” Angelica wished she had better advice, but there was nothing she could do. Homeschooling had been outlawed, and she couldn’t afford private school. Although they weren’t teaching anything different due to state laws. Ten was such a tender age, and she hated that her son was being filled with lies and deception.

  “Look who’s making breakfast!” Wearing sweats and a pink Victoria Secret nightshirt, Leigh appeared from the hallway, hand in hand with her seven-year-old son, Joel.

  Even with her long black hair a mess, Leigh’s tall, shapely figure and exotic face made her look more like a model than a checker at Walmart. She and Angelica had met at a single parents’ club and became instant friends. Moving in together made good sense since Angelica watched Joel during the day while Leigh worked, and at night, Leigh watched Isaac while Angelica worked.

  Joel ran to sit beside Isaac who was playing a game on his phone.

  Leigh frowned and pointed to Angelica’s open Bible. “What’s this?”

  “Yikes.” Angelica winced. “I’m sorry. I got up late and hadn’t done my reading yet.”

  Leigh groaned. “Do you want us all to be arrested?”

  “I’m sorry.” Angelica dried her hands on a towel, silently chastising herself. “I’ll keep it in my room like I promised.”

  “Who knows who’s watching us?” Leigh glanced over the room, her eyes landing suspiciously on the TV.

  It was hard to imagine anyone would be spying on two single moms barely making ends meet, but the way the world was going, who knew?

  “Why don’t you toss it and get the accepted version?” Leigh yawned and poured herself some coffee.

  “Because the NWLV version has been changed.”

  “All they did was take out the bad parts, the offensive, archaic stuff.” Leigh sipped her coffee.

  “You mean the truth?” Angelica smiled. Oh, how she prayed for God to open her friend’s eyes. “No arguing today, ’kay? Let’s enjoy a good breakfast.” Grabbing a plate from the cupboard, she handed it to her friend.

  “Not watching this horrid news.” Leigh grabbed the remote and began switching stations.

  A familiar voice made Angelica nearly drop her plate. Heart plummeting, she lifted her gaze to the TV where Daniel Cain’s face appeared larger than life on the screen.

  Chapter 2

  Pure and undefiled religion in the sight of our God and Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their distress, and to keep oneself unstained by the world.

  James 1:27 (NASB)

  Angelica spread her Little Mermaid towel under a palm tree, set down her beach bag, and turned to rub sunscreen over Isaac.

  “Mommm,” he complained. “I’m not a baby anymore. I can do it myself.” He pushed her hand away.

  “You always miss spots and you know how you burn.” She continued lathering on the cream until she was satisfied, then cupped his chin and kissed his forehead. “Now, go have fun. But come back when you see Anna.”

  Grabbing his surfboard, he darted off, kicking up sand as he went.

  “Watch the undertow!” she called after him, then said a prayer for his safety as she quickly switched to the spirit. The being of light appeared, strolling beside Isaac, shorter than other angels she’d seen and wider in girth, but fully armed and always by her son’s side. Thank you, Father. If there was one thing that made a person pray more, it was having a child. And if there was one thing that had helped Angelica realize God’s love for her, it was the love she had for Isaac. She always told the Father that if He loved her even half as much as she loved Isaac, she had nothing to fear. To which He always replied, “I love you much more than that.”

  She smiled. She’d not had an earthly father, and the resulting insecurity and search for love had cost her dearly. If only she had embraced God as Father earlier in life…if only she had received His unconditional love, she could have avoided so much pain—to herself and others.

  But then she wouldn’t have Isaac. His laughter drew her gaze back to him, sitting atop his board several yards out from shore. He waved, and she waved back, thanking God for turning her mistakes into such a glorious blessing. Now, if she could only raise Isaac knowing God as Father, he could avoid making those same mistakes.

  Lowering to her towel, Angelica put away the sunscreen and watched as her son caught a wave and stood, weaving his way through the foamy surf to shore. Living so close to the ocean, he had become a proficient swimmer and a fairly good surfer. So much so, that many of the kids frequenting the beach had befriended him. His outgoing, charming personality naturally attracted people—so like his father. Yet, thankfully, their similarities ended there.

  Clouds moved aside, and the sun’s full glare made Angelica slip on her sunglasses. Though early in the morning, the beach was already getting crowded. Families set up their umbrellas and coolers, kids dragged pails and shovels to the wet sand, teenage girls wearing string bikinis lathered on suntan lotion, giggling at boys who ogled them from a distance. A volleyball game started yards to her left. Behind her, the hum of traffic on Ocean Blvd buzzed, accompanied by the creak of shopping carts pushed along the sidewalk by the homeless.

  Saturday was not the best day to go to the beach if one wanted peace. In a few hours there’d hardly be an empty spot on the sand to lay a towel. But it was the best time to help others see the light of God’s truth. Something she wasn’t particularly good at herself, but with the support of other believers, God had blessed their Saturday meeti
ngs. Already a few people she remembered from last week waved at her and began assembling in their normal spot.

  Taking off her sunglasses, she made her way to the water before the leaders, Anna and Clay, arrived. As a child, she’d spent many hours at the beach—snorkeling, swimming, and body surfing—and she never grew tired of the warm salty water, the smells of the sea, and the horizon that seemed to stretch to eternity. Battling incoming waves, she waded out to her waist then dove beneath the water. Warmth soothed her body like a liquid massage, easing away her tensions and muting sounds of the world above, luring her deeper to a tranquil place where violence, sorrow, and evil could not exist. Kicking her feet, she sped downward, embracing a few precious moments of peace and calm before lack of air forced her to surface.

  After spotting Isaac several yards to her left teaching a young boy how to surf, she swam to shore and headed for her towel.

  “Oh!” She bumped into a column of brick…no, a man. “I’m sorry.” Raking back her wet hair, she stared up at him, blinking water from her eyes. No! Can’t be! But it was. Daniel Cain—bare-chested, muscles rounding his chest and arms, six-pack stomach—staring at her as if she were a mermaid emerging from the sea. Ever since he had appeared on her TV screen three days ago, she’d tried to put him out of her mind. Surely, that incident hadn’t counted as actually seeing his face, had it? So, she had ignored it, along with the nagging twinge in her spirit. But she couldn’t very well ignore the hunk of man now standing before her.

  Good one, Father. Sometimes she didn’t find God’s sense of humor funny at all.

  Great. Why was he just standing there staring at her as if she’d sprouted horns? Pushing past him, she started up the sand.

  “Angel?”

  She closed her eyes. No, no, no! Swallowing, she turned around.

  “It is you!” He smiled—that brilliant, charming smile of his—as he removed earbuds from his ears and scanned her from head to toe. Did he really need to study every inch of her to confirm it was her? Though she wore a modest swimsuit, she suddenly had the urge to cover up the extra pounds she’d gained over the years.

  “How have you been?” he asked, sincerity in his eyes.

  “Fine.” She gave a plastic smile, hoping to dissuade him. “Busy.” She turned to leave, knowing it was the wrong thing to do, that God had put this man in her thoughts—in her path—for a reason.

  He gently grabbed her arm, chuckling. “That’s all I get after twelve years? Busy?”

  She pulled from his grip and continued walking. He fell in beside her. Drat!

  “I can’t believe you’re still in Fort Lauderdale,” he said cheerfully as if he hadn’t destroyed her life. “I’d love to catch up.”

  “I’d rather not, if you don’t mind.”

  This seemed to confuse him immensely. “Do you know who I am?”

  Halting, she faced him. “Is it so surprising that I want nothing to do with the great Pastor Daniel Cain?”

  An ember of unexpected sorrow burned in his eyes. “I guess it shouldn’t. I just thought…I thought after all these years…”

  “Where’s your entourage?” She glanced behind him.

  “What?”

  “Your bodyguards? Aren’t you too important to be left alone?” Turning, she kept walking, kicking up sand and battling the gentle tug within her to speak to him. But she didn’t want to speak to him.

  “I only need them for public events—wait.” He leapt in front of her. “That was you at my church the other day.” He fingered the stubble on his chin. “I didn’t recognize you behind all the makeup. But I should have with those eyes.”

  Skirting around him, she proceeded. Please, God, make him go away. One glance over her shoulder showed her Isaac was still happily surfing. Good.

  “What did you mean by what you said?” He followed her. “Why did you come to my church?”

  “I had a message to give you. That’s all.” Relief swept through her as she saw Clay and Anna setting up chairs beside her things, where a small crowd was already forming.

  She hoped that would dissuade Daniel from following her.

  It didn’t.

  Anna and Clay’s eyes widened at the sight of him, then shifted inquisitively to her.

  Grabbing a towel from her bag, Angelica began drying herself, doing her best to ignore him, while shaking her head in a not-so-subtle hint toward her friends. They didn’t get it. Instead, they eagerly approached, no doubt wanting an introduction.

  “Daniel Cain, these are my friends, Anna and Clay,” Angelica spat out quickly.

  “Pleased to meet you.” Daniel stretched out his hand and shook both of theirs, his gaze taking in Anna’s tattoo sleeve on both arms—a relic of her past. Yet, despite that past, at forty-five, she maintained a youthful glow that made her look much younger.

  “How do you two know each other?” Anna asked.

  “We don’t,” Angelica said at the same time Daniel said “Old friends.” Which made for an awkward moment.

  A moment that was thankfully interrupted by Isaac, who dropped his board and burst into the middle of them, hair dripping and a wide grin on his lips.

  “Clay, Anna!” he squealed, and the two embraced him, not caring that he was soaking wet.

  “You’re that big-time pastor.” Isaac stared up at Daniel.

  Angelica’s heart shriveled, even as Daniel seemed to grow taller. “I am, and who might you be?”

  “I’m Isaac. This is my mom.” He smiled at Angelica, and she handed him her towel.

  Daniel gaped at her, his brow crinkling. “You have a son?”

  “Yes.” She avoided eye contact and was thankful for the additional people who crowded around them—Hank, a homeless man; Sarah, a drug addict; two Cuban gang members; an off-duty fireman; JoAnn, an elderly woman they called Crazy Jo; and Mercy, a young mother.

  Clay pulled his guitar from its case, sat down, and began to tune it. “We share God’s Word here on Saturdays,” he said to Daniel. Though Clay looked like a rock star from the eighties with his long curly brown hair and skinny physique, he was the most Spirit-filled musician Angelica had ever heard.

  “Preaching?” Daniel snorted and ran a hand through his hair, making it stand up in all directions. “I’ve been jogging on this beach for years, and let me tell you, this crowd does not respond to having Jesus shoved in their faces.”

  “Good thing,” Anna said. “’Cause we don’t shove Jesus on anyone. We just recite God’s Word and love on people.”

  “You know what I mean,” Daniel said. “Besides if the city gets wind of this, they’ll drag you all to jail.”

  Clay jerked hair from his face and smiled. “Until then, we will do what God calls.”

  “Pastor Dan, can I call you Pastor Dan?” Anna said, a bit too glibly. “We are just loving people and praying for them. Angelica has a wonderful gift of discernment. She can pinpoint someone’s exact spiritual need. Then we pray for them—for healing or whatever. And if they need deliverance, my husband, Robert handles that.” She glanced around. “He’ll be here soon.”

  “Deliverance, as in demons?” Daniel laughed. “You guys are kidding, right? That stuff doesn’t happen anymore.”

  Anna shared a knowing smile with Angelica as Clay began to sing “Amazing Grace.” Isaac sat at his feet and joined him.

  “I need to speak to you, Angel.” Daniel tugged on her arm.

  “Please don’t call me that. And I’m busy right now.”

  “How about meeting me for coffee later?”

  Couldn’t the man take a hint? “I can’t. I’m sorry.” Even though she felt the Spirit nudging her within, felt God telling her to agree. I cannot do this, Father. Please. “It’s been nice seeing you again, Daniel. Now, if you’ll excuse me.”

  ♦♦♦

  Daniel’s heart felt as though it had been stomped into the sand by a herd of elephants. Certainly not because he still had feelings for Angel—after all these years and what she had done to him, that
would be ludicrous—but because he was simply unaccustomed to rejection. Backing away from the group, he retreated to the shoreline, then turned to watch her one last time.

  By now, a group of at least twenty people sat listening to the music. Much to his surprise, Angel began kneeling before each one, laying her hands on them and closing her eyes. After a minute or two, she would say something that seemed to have an impact on each person. Some shouted for joy. Others appeared to be crying. Anna followed in Angel’s wake, touching each person and mumbling prayers that he could not make out from where he stood. One elderly lady began to praise God so loudly, it drew the attention of others on the beach. An older man who looked like a Hells Angel, joined them and laid hands on a young man who began to shake and tremble like a tree in a hurricane. Two homeless men parked their carts by a nearby palm tree and joined the group, listening to Anna, who was now saying something that had them all riveted.

  Impossible. Charlatans. How had Angel gotten mixed up with this group of false prophets? She hadn’t even believed in God when he’d known her before. Pivoting on his heels, Daniel shoved the earbuds in his ears, turned on the music, and jogged down the beach.

  Yet, later on, as he was showering at church, he couldn’t stop thinking about Angel. Why wouldn’t she at least have coffee with him? After all, she was the one who broke his heart. She was the one who’d approached him after all these years with her cryptic warnings—warnings of which he certainly had a right to an explanation. Besides, after meeting her friends, he felt an obligation as a pastor to warn her about entangling herself with some crazy cult. Maybe Thomas had been right, and her mind was addled by drugs. It saddened him to think of how far she had fallen from the girl he once knew.