Catching Love

Home > Other > Catching Love > Page 3
Catching Love Page 3

by Harper Lauren


  Then again, seeing Rosie standing in my kitchen with her old faded boots, tanned, strong legs and her button up shirt hugging her body like a second skin, I didn’t want her to walk back out again. She was my past all wrapped up in her plaid, and yet she still looked like someone new, someone I wanted to know. Rosie looked nothing like the girls from the city, the ones who wore designer everything and made sure every hair was in place before they left the house.

  She was rustic, fresh, and still more stunning than any girl I had seen in years. My heart may have been broken by her broken promises, but I still didn’t want her taking one step out of the kitchen. It was a good thing that I didn’t have any cooking talent and she knew it. The moment I asked her to stay, she edged back into the kitchen and joined me at the stove, taking the wooden spoon from my hand, careful not to brush up against me at all.

  The scent of her vanilla hit me strong and filled me with hunger more than the gravy that was bubbling in front of us.

  She stirred in silence for a moment, turning the heat down on the gravy and stuck a fresh spoon in the dark liquid to give it a taste.

  “So, you run a horse farm now?” I asked. It was a stupid question since Jen had already boasted that Rosie was successfully running one, but I just wanted her to tell me. In part I wanted to hear her voice, I was dying for it, but also because deep down I needed to know what had been so important that she had left me.

  “Yea, actually I bought some open land about four years ago and everything just started to snowball quickly.”

  “It probably helped that you had been riding for years and had such a reputation in the world of horses and competitions.” I’d always loved watching her ride, probably more than she loved watching me play football. I’d sit all day at those competitions and watch her move so fluidly with an animal, unafraid that at any moment something unpredictable may happen.

  She blushed at my compliment at riding and kept her eyes trained on the gravy, pretending that she needed to focus hard on what she was doing.

  “I was alright,” she finally admitted. “Of course, not as good as you with football. I mean honestly, I never got the chance to congratulate you on getting drafted and everything else you’ve accomplished. It really is amazing and everyone in town is so proud of you.”

  The day I was drafted was the most amazing day I could think of. It was what I’d worked hard for my entire life, spending every day of the year training myself and practicing. I could eat, sleep, and breathe football and making it was the payoff I’d dreamt of. But I hated than when I went back to my apartment that night, there was only one person I wanted to call, one person I wanted there to cheer with me and celebrate, and she was the one person who didn’t want anything to do with me.

  “Well, thanks,” I said simply. I needed to change the topic before I let myself get dragged back into the past, before I let the bitter words slip out that I knew I was holding in. “So, how did you end up buying the land and getting all of this started?” Business felt like a safe topic of discussion but she didn’t answer. Instead she pulled out the rolls from the oven and brushed past me to put the hot tray on the counter.

  “I knew I needed to do something with my life and when I thought about it, there were only two things in my life I was ever passionate about, horses was one of them. So when I got the opportunity to do something about it, I jumped in and worked myself to the bone for it.”

  “What’s the other thing that you were always passionate about?”

  This time her eyes did meet mine, clear, open, raw. A lump formed in my throat as I knew what she was going to say before she even had to say it. But still, the single syllable rolled off of her tongue and lingered heavy in the warm air between us.

  “You.”

  We looked at each other for a long moment, a million words between us, but none of them coming out. Instead we really looked at each other, remembering who we were and seeing who we became.

  “I’ve got the ice cream!” my mom called as she stepped into the kitchen, breaking our spell.

  Quickly Mom put the cloth grocery bag on the counter and flung her arms around Rosie, greeting her like a long lost daughter, as she had greeted me when I stepped in the house earlier that day.

  Suddenly the house was busy again with chatter and laughter and the bubble that was surrounding us was popped. It was no longer just Rosie and me but a house full of family and words left unsaid.

  Chapter 8

  Rosie

  As wonderful as being in Alex’s house felt, it also felt as if I was looking at the world I could have had. Like I was getting to step onto the road that wasn’t traveled to see how it would have looked. I loved my horse farm and I was happy in my life, but it was easy to see how much happier I could have been if I still had Alex by my side. Even as I stirred the gravy, took out the rolls, helped to prepare the dinner, I could picture myself being his wife. Helping his mom cook those dinner as her daughter-in-law, having family dinner each week just like we used to.

  But that wasn’t reality; that was the life that wasn’t to be.

  I did my best to smile through the family meal and I even felt true laughter at a few points in conversation. As his dad told us stories about Alex and his sister, stories we all knew but that were fun to hear again, Granny sniped at Alex’s sister about getting herself a career, and everyone plowed through the delicious foods like one big happy family.

  “So, Rosie, how’s your mom doing?” Mama asked.

  It was a small town and rumors were always around, but I still was able to avoid seeing the Croft’s as best as I could. And when I did see them it was only for a quick hello in passing. Not because I didn’t want to see them but because I missed them too much. In fact, in the past four years I had hardly spoken to them at all.

  “Mom is doing as well as she can. We’re going to be putting the house up for sale and buying something smaller very soon,” I answered.

  Alex looked up from his food in surprise. “You’re selling your house? How is your dad handling that? He put everything he had into restoring that old house.”

  The table went uncomfortably silent. It was true, my dad did do everything that he could to save that old house and I would give anything to be able to keep it. Tears sprang to my eyes as I felt the sting of failure knowing that I couldn’t keep it anymore, it was just too big and I was never home to help her.

  I didn’t need to say anything though as Granny stepped in for me. She grasped onto Alex’s arm and quietly answered him, as if saying it too loud might break me.

  “Her father passed away four years ago, Alex.”

  I swiped at the tears that were beginning to roll down my cheeks and felt Mama’s comfort of her hand on mine.

  “Rosie, I’m so sorry,” Alex answered sincerely. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

  I shrugged and tried to act as if it didn’t matter, as if none of the hurt mattered, but it did. “You didn’t call me back.”

  Everyone at the table fell silent, no one knew quite what to say. Even the clink of silverware on plates was silent as we were all done with our dinners. I shouldn’t have come, it was a mistake. I’d never been able to forgive him for not coming back for me and that was obvious. I tried to open my mouth, to excuse myself from the mess I was sitting in but when I looked up from my empty plate I saw Alex staring at me. His eyes piercing me as if he could see right through me, into my heart, my soul, just like he always used to be able to.

  “I’ve got a good idea!” Granny finally spoke out. “Why don’t we put in the old football tape we’ve got? I’m sure it’s been years since Alex has seen any of his high school footage, it would be a great way to reminisce.” Without waiting for an answer, Granny stood from the table and went to the TV in the living room.

  My eyes fell away from Alex’s and turned instead to Jen’s, who I was hoping was going to save me from the nightmare that I was in. But instead she seemed to think it was a great idea too and started to help clear plates,
chatting happily about the times we all used to have back in high school. There was no way I was going to be able to pull her away from watching herself in her cheerleading uniform. So instead of fighting or being rude to people who had always cared for me so much, I stood from the table and helped to clear the dishes as well. Alex followed Granny into the living room and though I couldn’t hear what they were saying I could hear the harsh whispers and I was sure Alex was angry with her about something. Perhaps inviting his ex-girlfriend to stay even longer than he wanted, perhaps that he didn’t want to go down memory lane any more than I did.

  “We watch a couple of minutes and then we get out of here. Got it?” I told Jen.

  “Oh come on, doesn’t it feel good to be back in the old farm house? Back with the family again?”

  I wasn’t sure what it felt like, perfect or painful, but I think it was a mix of both.

  “Just a couple of minutes,” I repeated.

  Granny called to us from the living room and I shot Jen a glance that told her I was not kidding one bit and then we both found our way into the living room. My heart nearly stopped, my mind falling years back in time as I saw Alex running out onto the field.

  Star quarterback, his young, muscular body one that every girl dreamt of, lining up on the field. I stood behind the couch, refusing to sit next to Jen and Granny, as they chatted happily about the past. My cheeks heated and my heart beat became sporadic as I watched him play. His arms, so strong, throwing the football so effortlessly into the air as it easily hit its target. The way he jumped, amped up with excitement, a general shouting and commanding his team, he was mesmerizing to watch.

  I had forgotten how talented, how beautiful he was to watch. I had avidly avoided watching any of his college or professional games. It was too much for me to stomach, and now I realized why. He was a god on the field, one that for a little while I had the pure pleasure of being with, of being his goddess. My stomach began to churn with the feeling of being homesick, but it wasn’t for a place. It was for a person, for a time, that I could never get back.

  It took me a few plays to realize that everyone was talking animatedly about that homecoming game, football being as important as life in the south, but Alex’s deep rumble was absent. It was hard to tear my eyes away from the screen, from watching the strength and magnetism of him, to look at him in the present. Instead of watching his tape, he was watching me. The heat from my cheeks turned to flames and I quickly headed for the door.

  I needed to get away from Alex and his uncanny ability to still fill the whole room.

  Chapter 9

  Alex

  I was never able to count the number of times in one game that I would look up in the stands to Rosie, to see her watching me. I loved the way she watched, so intense, so mesmerized by the way I played. It made me want to play harder, be perfect, because the more proud I made her, the more amazing I felt. The feeling of being a hero to someone as special as Rosie was as close to feeling immortal as I would ever get.

  When it came to watching the tape from high school, I didn’t care about the plays I made or how I looked back then. It didn’t matter. I had seen myself enough on TV and in magazines. But what I hadn’t seen in years, what I had only been able to dream of, was the way that Rosie looked when she watched me.

  As soon as she stepped into the room I couldn’t take my eyes off of her, the way her jaw clenched every time I made a pass, the way her eyes glowed when I made my calls, it was the most exciting feeling I’d had in a long time. But when she caught me watching she ran from the room and out the front door and I followed right behind her.

  My large strides caught up to her small ones quickly. My hand grabbed for her elbow and I tuned her toward me, the expression on her face a mix of so many feelings.

  “Why didn’t you tell me about your dad?” I asked. There were so many questions burning inside me, so many things I needed to know, but that was the first thing that popped out of my mouth.

  Rosie’s eyes looked at my hand on her elbow as if I was a foreign object and she had no idea how it had gotten there but I didn’t let go. “I couldn’t.”

  “Why?” I repeated.

  She finally looked at me, her eyes sparking with fresh tears. “I thought you knew. I thought your family would have told you.”

  That was another bone I was going to have to pick when I got back to the house but I had a feeling I already knew the answer as to why they hadn’t told me. I was so wrapped up in football and myself, so angry at Rosie, that they probably just figured they should leave my past in the past.

  “Your family was wonderful, they helped my mom and me with so much,” she said.

  I squeezed my eyes shut and tried to erase the image of Rosie, crying over her dad, the funeral, the burial, and no one was there to hold her. Most importantly, I wasn’t there.

  “You should have called, I would have been there for you,” I told her. I risked taking a small step closer to her, wanting to feel the warmth of the sun that always seemed to radiate from her.

  “You hadn’t talked to me in such a long time, I didn’t think you wanted to hear from me anymore.” It was almost imperceptible but she took one small step toward me too.

  She was right, I hadn’t called her or texted or anything at all. Once I knew she wasn’t coming to be with me, that she was staying back home and had let me go there all on my own, I was angry. But that was no excuse. She shouldn’t have had to go through the death of her dad alone, most importantly without me.

  “I would have been there for you, your family was my family,” I said. My hand slid from her elbow to her hand, I was no longer holding her in place but just holding on to her.

  She noticed and her eyes traveled down to where our finger had entwined as if on their own, as if they knew where home was all along.

  “It’s in the past, you can’t go back to the past,” she whispered, her voice hoarse with emotion.

  I knew she was talking about more than just the funeral and I knew she was right. You couldn’t go back to the past, but that didn’t stop me from needing a small taste of it, to dip my toe back into what it used to feel like.

  Stepping forward I closed the gap between us and felt something sizzle, spark, and I couldn’t resist a moment longer. I leaned down to her and my lips gently touched hers, afraid of what she might do. But I heard her breath leave her in a sigh the moment we connected and that was all the sign I needed.

  I pressed my body up against her and kissed her harder and with more intention. There was a moment of hesitation before she melted into me and wrapped her delicate arms around my neck while I held her tightly at her waist. The taste of her made me dizzy, the feel of her aroused me. I could have stood there forever in the middle of the driveway, her tongue fluttering against mine, lost in my past.

  “Rosie? You alright?”

  Immediately Rosie pulled away at the sound of Jen’s voice. It took everything I had to let her go, to not anchor her against me tightly.

  “Yeah, I’m fine,” she called back to where Jen was standing on the porch.

  Rosie’s eyes met mine one more time before she stepped away completely.

  “Are you ready to go?” she asked Jen.

  I turned to see Jen nod and walk toward the car. Rosie did the same, without even a look back to me, to what had just happened. But what had just happened? I didn’t know how to describe how holding her felt, how her kiss had melted some cold iceberg that had been inside of me for so long.

  Chapter 10

  Rosie

  I didn’t have much to say as Jen drove me back to my mom’s home. I could have walked, it was just down the road, but I felt so drained, so suddenly exhausted. My mind was spinning fast with emotion, the past blending with the present, that I wouldn’t have been able to form a solid thought even if I’d tried.

  Jen gave me the night off, not pressuring me for any details. I presumed that she had seen us kissing in the driveway and I was sure that if she had
, that she knew I didn’t have any idea what to say. What had I been thinking anyway? I wasn’t even sure. All I knew was that the feel of his hand, rough and strong when his fingers laced mine, the ways his lips curled up at the ends when he spoke as if he was always smiling just a little, pulled me into him. He was like a magnet and my body had no choice but to lean into his, to feel the strong planes of his body.

  But the moment that Jen called out to me, it was like the spell was broken. My heart was racing so hard I could barely catch my breath. Alex was always able to make me lose myself, to forget not only my head but also the world around me. And with just one kiss he had been able to do it again, make me forget everything that had happened, everything that had changed in the last five years since he’d been away.

  When I arrived at work the next morning, I was just as confused as I had been the night before. Confused and scared actually. Confused because I had no idea what was running through my mind, no idea what was going through my heart. I tossed and turned in the night, my heart lurching in the pain of missing him one minute, but then my mind remembered what he had put me through and my heart turned to a cold, angry stone.

  “So, are you finally going to tell me what happened with you and Alex?” Jen asked while we were getting ready for Granny’s party in the banquet hall.

  I was going around the tables setting places, and she followed me helping.

 

‹ Prev