by Jamie Day
Puzzled, I opened the purse and lifted a couple copper coins. “Money?” I asked. “Why will I need money?”
My family had traded horses since before I was born, and Father had collected plenty of coins like this from his dealings. In Aisling, practical trading involved substance and useful things. Few villagers used money, since most possessed none.
“They don’t barter much in DarMattey,” answered Father, chuckling as I examined the odd designs in the copper. “You’ll need food while you’re there.”
“Sianna will provide for Rhiannon,” said Mother, emerging from the pantry. She took the coins from my fingers and dropped them into the purse. “There will be no use for these at all.”
I glanced at Father, who nodded his intention that I keep his offering.
Mother didn’t argue. Instead, she grabbed my hand and pressed the pouch into my stomach. “I suggest you keep this hidden if you intend to keep it. There’s no need to attract attention in a new place.”
“Rhiannon will get plenty of attention there.” Ethan appeared at the end of the hall and grinned at me as he teased. “They might even laugh at you.”
I groaned. My brother had confirmed my fears from the night. DarMattey was foreign and I would be a stranger there. I suspected they would accept me as much I wanted to go. As my stomach twisted tighter, Mother released my hand and returned to the kitchen.
Father scolded Ethan and then reached out with a large hand and pulled me close to him. The scent of sunflower soap from the horse brushing lingered on his arms. It gave me as much comfort as his embrace. “You’ll be safe,” he said, warmly. “That’s what matters. DarMattey is a different place, but the people there are as kind as you’ve known here. They would be fools not to love you.” When he wanted to, Father could calm a bear.
My stomach eased its grip enough for me to thank him and I squeezed him tight. “I’m going to miss you.”
Mother placed a smoking plate of bacon on the table. The smell curled and beckoned us to inhale.
“I’ll miss all of you,” I said, smiling at the food that had lured me downstairs. “And I’m going to miss your cooking, Mother.”
“Yes, you will.” She grinned. “Sianna taught Nia how to cook.”
The twisting in my stomach returned. Nia had always been a horrible baker. Despite my mother’s efforts to help my best friend improve, Nia’s cooking had progressively worsened every season. I rushed to the table and fought Ethan for the thickest slice of pork.
~ O ~
While I finished my preparations for the journey, earlier doubts returned and took up residence in my stomach, making me feel like I was falling from a tall tree without landing on the ground. I closed my eyes and waited for the feeling to pass—but it never left me. Unsure of what to pack, since I had never been on a journey, I added three more dresses, my favorite sandals, a brush, and a tiny jar of rose powder to the leather satchel that Father brought me from the barn. Then I took a final look at my room. I hadn’t meant to stay in this house forever, but I never imagined leaving this way, under threat. I dropped my bag and crawled under my bed, retrieving a written memory of Sean from behind a broken board. His letter to me. I held it close and allowed his voice to whisper in my mind.
“Our love follows fate.” His voice sounded so close, so real. If I opened my eyes, he could have been standing next to me. I knew better, but I savored the memory.
As I tucked the parchment into a satchel pocket, the peace was broken by Leila’s excited squeals downstairs. For a moment, I tried to recapture the feeling Sean’s letter had ignited, but my sister’s voice was too loud to ignore. I left my room and stepped slowly downstairs.
My good friend Madeline rushed toward me when I passed through the front door. “You’re going to have a wonderful journey,” she said. Her voice carried exhilarating refreshment, like a fulfilling song.
The stomach flurries left me. Suddenly, I was excited again. I dropped the satchel and welcomed Madeline’s hug; she was warm and full of energy. I accepted all she offered. “Thank you for coming,” I told her with a smile. “I was nervous until now.”
Madeline leaned back and held my hands. “It’s a beautiful day to travel, and DarMattey is fantastic. I look forward to joining you soon.”
“Is your bag ready?” Father leaned behind me and lifted the satchel.
“Yes, Father,” I answered, stepping forward to allow him room to pass. “I wasn’t sure if I should take a blanket or a pillow.”
“You won’t need them,” offered Madeline, interrupting with a grin. “Sianna has plenty for all of us.”
“I packed one already.” Father smiled as he lifted the bag on Maeia, who stood ready on the front lawn. “I won’t send you away without a comfortable sleeping blanket.”
I smiled back at him before turning back toward Madeline. It was good to see her, and her bright smile told me she felt no burdens for the difficult decision she was once a part of—the choice to remove me from the Fae. I had never blamed her for my exit, but had wondered what our next meeting would be like. Several weeks later, her face was kind and forgiving. It was as if, in her eyes, I were still welcome in the faerie circle.
“Travel with good fortune,” she whispered. “Give this to Sianna.” She handed me an ivory envelope that smelled like roses. “You’ll finder her at the first store when you reach town. We’ll talk more when I arrive.”
Mother and Leila cried while we shared final hugs. Then Ethan led Maeia through the front gate. There, I mounted my saddle and faced my family.
I patted my beloved mare on the neck and rubbed behind her right ear. “Our fates are joined,” I said. “Goodbye. I’ll miss you all.”
I nudged Maeia forward and turned for one final look over my shoulder. The tears from my family shared everything I loved about Aisling; even Ethan was crying. I wiped my face, nodded my acceptance to their wishes, and began my journey.
~ O ~
I had expected curiosity as I traveled through the village; however, everyone’s reaction to Maeia was overwhelming. Children squealed and ran to us. They asked permission to touch her shiny coat before backing away and frightening each other with giggles and squeals. Friends and relatives offered support to me and asked where I was traveling. Strangers gaped and stared as we trotted past their homes. Maeia didn’t like the attention, and tried ardently to gallop down the road, but I held her reins tight and let the braver children feed her green apples.
Near the center of our village, before my first intended stop, we passed Michael Dunn. He carried a heavy sack of flour over one shoulder and stopped walking when we approached. As he petted my horse with affection, Abigail Bree stepped from behind the trees, bringing with her a shadow that instantly cooled the day.
“Hello, Rhiannon,” she said, walking toward us with deliberate intention.
I lost a breath and stared. As one of the Fae, she had chosen to remove me from the sisterhood. I had been uncertain what our first meeting afterward would be like, and the ice in her voice confirmed my worries.
“Hello.” I squeezed Maeia’s reins tight. “How are you, Abigail?”
“I’m well. Thank you.” She stopped walking and circled us like a preying wolf.
Maeia glanced nervously around and snorted a warning.
“I heard that Sean found your white horse,” she said, twisting his name without a hint of pity for my lost love. “She is magnificent. I’m sorry I never saw her before.”
“It was a difficult season,” I admitted. “After the cruelty of the winter, I didn’t leave the house much.”
“I know.” Abigail stopped pacing. “When will you return the scrolls you stole?”
“Have a good journey,” said Michael, interrupting the moment. He scooped his sack of flour and lumbered away.
He was smart to leave us; Abigail’s words stabbed the air, scratching everything they touched. The Fae scrolls were the sacred record of Aisling. I had taken them last season to meet the ransom dema
nded by Sean’s captors. The scrolls never made it. Darian, the bandit, stole them. I looked up at the sun, hoping the cloud that veiled its warmth would pass soon. When it didn’t, I stared back at Abigail, refusing to answer her question.
Abigail reached out to touch Maeia’s nose, but stopped when Maeia stiffened. “Where are you going?”
“It’s okay, girl,” I told Maeia, stroking her slowly. “It’s all right.” I took a deep breath and answered. “We’re going to Evermore.”
“Oh, I see.” Abigail took a step backward. “Have a pleasant visit.”
No visit to Evermore is pleasant. “It is good to see you,” I said, trying my best to disguise my lie. Truthfully, I was mortified. My voice shivered. “Will you come to the house sometime?”
Abigail didn’t answer as she returned to the trees from where she came. I didn’t move, but watched to see if she’d look back at us. She didn’t.
“Come on.” I nudged Maeia. “It’s only a little further.”
Maeia stood in place, facing east again, and refused my prompting to leave until the sun returned to warm us. Even then, her steps felt awkward and out of pace. She knew something wasn’t right. I rubbed the diamond on my necklace, hoping she was still wrong, but understood that the sudden reunion with Abigail was perhaps a sign of things to come. My friend, my dear friend, had changed from a trusting ally to a cold reminder of the winter past. I swallowed a breath of painful memory and forced my mare forward.
When we reached the trail leading to Evermore, I stepped down and led Maeia through the winding gap in the trees. Morning light caught the tips of the overhead leaves; they sparkled in silence, as if the souls of the departed rode upon the tiny rays, welcoming us with subtle grandeur. The tranquility on the trail was a welcome change from the rest of the village. I took long deep breaths and waved one hand in the air to capture the magnificence.
The clearing was also calm. Evermore lacked a breeze or a sound, and yellow flowers on tall stems grew from every spot of soil, except one solitary mound. That’s where I knelt. That’s where Sean lay buried. Maeia stayed in the trees—she refused to enter the clearing—and watched as I allowed my sorrow to flow.
Kneeling at Sean’s grave, I allowed cherished memories to return. I felt his warmth, I heard his voice, and I saw his smile. He held me again. I shuddered when his hands touched my skin. I remembered the last time we had kissed. I didn’t wail or moan, but I wept honest tears and offered my heart again to the only man I had ever loved. It felt good to cry.
I didn’t leave Evermore until I had told my story to the mound without flowers. Sean was dead; I knew that, but I needed to tell him everything. No one else seemed to understand me, and my departed took in every word without judgment or words. Before leaving, I pressed my hand into the soft soil of his grave and left a mark of my visit. Then I rubbed my necklace. I would carry him always near my heart.
~ O ~
At the eastern edge of Aisling, near the tall evergreens, I led Maeia away from the main road again. It was quiet, and the voices of tiny birds had difficulty passing into the overgrown trail. Wagons or horses rarely came this way anymore, which saddened me. The Bauer homes had once been a kind haven for weary travelers from the mountain.
The courtyard between the small buildings was still peaceful, though, and filtered sunlight offered crisp highlights and faded shadows from the well in its center. When Maeia stopped, Eldon Bauer leapt from his front porch and ran toward us.
“Hello,” I said, offering a wave.
He didn’t speak but approached Maeia without hesitation. Though she towered over the small man, she adored him, grinning and nickering as he rubbed her nose and stroked her coat. Eldon had a way with her that surprised me. The calmness that radiated from him steadied her normal shyness.
“Her name is Maeia,” I told him as I dismounted.
Eldon smiled approvingly and continued his affection.
“How have you been, Eldon?”
He looked up at me and smiled again with the toothless grin I remembered. Eldon hobbled to the well and lowered the bucket to its depths. As he turned the metal crank, he whistled a tune that sounded like birds calling to one another. I closed my eyes and imagined what they could be saying. It was peaceful, serene. When the whistling stopped, I opened my eyes. Eldon poured fresh water into a shallow bucket for Maeia, then handed me a small wooden cup. I nodded my thanks and drank.
Instantly, cool refreshment soothed me and made my body tingle, reminding me of why this well was so important. This was the best water in Aisling. I leaned down to the man and kissed him on the cheek, offering heartfelt thanks. It was charming to see his face turn flush and red.
“Where’s Earl?” I asked, unsure what to discuss with a man who couldn’t talk. I wasn’t uncomfortable, but his silence made me anxious. I shifted my stance in the dirt.
Eldon pointed to the hill. Earl was walking toward us. He was muddy to his waist, but smiled as he approached.
“Good morning. How are you, Rhiannon?”
It was nice to hear a voice.
“I’m well, thank you,” I answered, returning the small bucket to Eldon’s hands. “I came to offer greetings. I’m traveling to DarMattey for a while.”
Both men listened intently while I told them about Darian’s escape attempt and my protective journey. There was no need to keep secrets from them; they were like family to me. Earl wasn’t quiet, and asked many questions. I could tell he missed company, and saw the sadness in his eyes whenever mention of the bandit trickled into my words. I had lost my fiancé last Moon Season, while he had lost his oldest son.
While we sat around the well, drinking more water, Earl talked about planting and the upcoming Sun Season. I laughed at his jokes and obliged him by listening intently to his tales of harvest that would come. I welcomed the company. These men were honest and hardworking. Like their sought after well water, they were pure and rare.
We talked so much that the morning passed. When I finally looked for the sun, it was already midday.
“Thank you for the water and the words.” I told the men, excusing myself from the well to prepare my leave.
“Thank you for the visit.” Earl looked nervously back at his home. “Do you want to go inside?” he asked. “And look around?”
His question sent a chill down to my toes. I didn’t expect such a question and wasn’t certain what he meant. “I’ve seen your house, Earl. Thank you.”
“There’s some of Sean’s things still inside. You may take what you wish,” he said.
I sighed, thankful for his clarification. I was a nice gesture, although unneeded. Village tradition was supposed to keep us from remaining in the past. We left our memories in Evermore with departed loved ones, and then visited them there. Lingering on the lost only prolonged the pain of a person’s passing. I missed Sean, but knew better than to ask for a reminder of his life. Still, there was something I wanted.
“Do you have the shield?” I asked. “The one I gave as a promise gift.” I turned to Eldon. “It’s the one you helped me find. At the cave you told me about.”
The little man beamed and patted one of my hands with both of his. He ran toward his home and disappeared inside.
“I’m sorry,” said Earl, lowering his head. “I haven’t seen the shield or the helmet you gave to my son. Not since the attack.”
I swallowed my disappointment; it felt like a small stone as it slipped into my stomach and weighed it down. “That’s all I wanted,” I said, forcing a flat smile. “It’s a shame that it was stolen.”
“They didn’t take much,” said Earl, continuing his explanation. “Just some of Cael’s things, Sean’s armor, and some coins.”
I shifted my weight from one foot to the other while rubbing my hands. They had become moist and cold from talk of the attack.
“I’m sorry for your loss, Earl.” I stepped back and adjusted Maeia’s saddle, indicating my intention to leave. “It’s unfortunate that fate left u
s in our conditions.”
Eldon returned, almost tripping as he ran from his home. He handed Earl a rolled parchment.
“Are you certain?” asked Earl, facing his brother after examining the scroll.
Eldon nodded.
Then Earl turned to me. “We have something for you, Rhiannon.” He handed me the parchment. “It’s a gift from our family.”
I looked at it, but didn’t open it to read. “What is this?”
“Take a look.”
Both men stared while I opened the roll. It took a moment to understand what I was reading; I had never seen a deed before.
I gasped. “I can’t accept this. No, this isn’t for me.” I rolled the paper and tried to hand it back. “I’m sorry, this is too much. Thank you for the gesture.”
None of the men would accept my hand. Earl shoved the scroll back toward me. “Please take it,” he said. “Accepting this is your gift to us. It allows a part of our family—that could have been lost—to join you.”
I couldn’t fight the tears anymore. Giant drops of happy, unbelieving joy flowed free while I held the deed to the land where Sean and I had once planned to build a home.
I grabbed both men and squeezed, thanking them as their hair smothered my face. Then I pulled myself away and wiped my face with the sleeve of my dress. “There’s something you should know,” I said, sniffling to compose my speech.
It wasn’t customary to discuss such things, but they needed to understand the truth. I couldn’t accept their gift without telling them. It wouldn’t have felt right.
“I’m not a faerie anymore.”
Their expressions didn’t change.
“I’m not the perfect woman you think I am,” I admitted. “I want you to know that. I did horrible things and was removed from the Fae.” I reached my hand toward Earl. “I shouldn’t accept such a gift with my own failings.”