by Rebecca Pugh
‘I know,’ she nodded. ‘Still, the more I think about it, perhaps it’s for the best that it all happened. It’s an odd thing to say, I know, but Mike didn’t confess. I found out myself. I reckon that if I hadn’t found out, he wouldn’t have told me about it. He would have carried on behind my back while I was completely oblivious to it all, and the thought of that is terrible. Me, going about my daily business, with no idea whatsoever of what he was up to.’
‘Men!’ Millie seethed, shaking her head at the injustice of it.
Maria shrugged. ‘Anyway, that’s why I’m here. To get over my failed marriage. What about you? Have you always lived here?’
Millie peeled off her cardigan and rolled back her shoulders in the sunshine. A few newcomers were heading towards the pub, the place was beginning to liven up for the evening. Maria imagined that it would be swarming when summer really took hold. It had the most perfect views and a lovely atmosphere that made her want to kick off her shoes and partake in a little sunbathing. ‘This is where I was born and bred,’ said Millie. ‘My daughter, Susie? Her dad took off as soon as we found out I was pregnant. Another bastard. I was only young too, so I was terrified about what lay ahead. Still, we’ve managed pretty well with it being just the two of us, and Mum helps out a lot with childcare while I work my shifts at the salon. Susie’s an angel, she and my mum are like birds of a feather, they spend so much time together.’
‘So no boyfriend on the scene now?’ Maria found it hard to believe that someone as fantastic and gorgeous as Millie was single. Still, she couldn’t really blame her. Not that she’d actually say anything to Millie, she was still young with a promising future ahead of her, but Maria’s faith in good men had waned dramatically. It wasn’t a surprise really, considering what she’d been through. She hated that she felt so bitter about it. She knew it was completely unfair to tar every man with the same brush just because of her own experiences. After all, just because one had broken her heart, didn’t mean they all would. Who knew? Perhaps it was possible, in the future, that she’d think about taking a chance on love again. But then again, Ellen hadn’t remarried, and she seemed content with the single life. All these years later, she was a happy and carefree woman, and to look at her, you wouldn’t have thought the divorce had ever happened. It gave Maria hope, knowing that her mother had managed to get through and come out the other side wearing a smile and determined to carry on.
‘No,’ Millie replied with a little shrug. ‘I barely have time for myself, never mind a man. I mean, if I came across someone really special and he proved to me that he’d stick around, as well as accept Susie, then maybe there’d be a chance for romance, but it hasn’t happened yet. I’m not holding out much hope either. After what you’ve told me, it sort of makes me wonder if it’s worth it.’
‘Of course it’s worth it.’ Maria realised how much like her mother she had sounded then. ‘You’re still young and there’s plenty of time for that special someone to come into your life. Don’t worry too much. I believe any man would be lucky to have you. Don’t listen to me and feel like there’s no hope, because there is, I promise. I just happen to have had a rough time of it, that’s all. You and I are in completely different boats too. There’s nothing wrong with believing in the fairy-tale. I did myself for a long, long time. It still happens for plenty of other women around the world. I just stumbled across a bad egg, that’s all.’
They continued chatting and, thankfully, moved on from the topic of men. Instead they spoke about Millie’s experiences of pregnancy, her daughter Susie, their respective parents, and anything else that happened to crop up along the way.
‘Another drink?’ Millie asked, raising her empty glass towards Maria.
‘Yeah, go on then. Why not? One more won’t hurt.’ And she was having a wonderful time sat there with Millie as the sun continued to grace everything within its reach.
‘Great. Back in a mo.’
Millie disappeared inside the pub, leaving Maria alone. It was then she noticed how many tables had been taken up around them. An elderly couple sat together at one, enjoying dinner accompanied with a glass of wine each. To her right, she could hear low laughter from a group of men, their table was littered with beer bottles and a couple of mobile phones.
One of the men in particular caught her eye and she watched him a little more closely. Perhaps it was the unruly, dark hair, or how out of place he looked compared to the others. While they were dressed in smart jeans and shirts, his jeans had rips in the knees and his t-shirt looked muddied as if he’d been rolling around in a field all afternoon. As if aware of Maria’s gaze, he glanced in her direction. He looked mean, scary almost, with frown lines between his brows that were firm and unyielding.
Maria looked away immediately. She hoped he didn’t think she’d been checking him out. How mortifying that would be. Thankfully, Millie returned with two fresh pints and placed them down onto the wooden table, giving her something to distract herself with. After taking a quick sip, Maria reached for her bag to get her purse but Millie shook her head.
‘No way, these are on me, as a thank you for the company this evening. Cheers!’
‘Cheers,’ Maria grinned, clinking her pint glass with Millie’s. She took a long sip, her senses already blurring from the beer and then, secretly, she glanced in the man’s direction again with the cold glass still raised to her lips. It was an effective object to hide behind. He was chatting to the blond-haired man sat beside him. His jaw was sharp and angular, she noticed, as he ran a hand along the side of it. He could cut ice with a jaw like that, although she doubted the need to do so would ever arise.
‘Who are you looking at?’ Mille leant to the side to see if she could locate Maria’s point of interest. ‘Oh, I see,’ she said slowly, her voice light with amusement.
‘No one!’ Maria shook her head quickly. ‘I’m just taking a look about the place. That’s all. It’s a completely new area to me. It’s only normal that I’m interested to see what’s what.’
Millie smirked. ‘It was Brad you were eyeing up, wasn’t it?’ She wore an all-knowing expression as she spoke.
‘Of course it wasn’t! I don’t even know who Brad is.’ Maria did her best to appear confused. So, his name was Brad, was it? She mentally filed away the information, although for what use she wasn’t entirely sure.
‘Yes, you do,’ giggled Millie. ‘Broad shoulders, messy hair, tattoo peeking out from under his t-shirt. You know exactly who Brad is. He’s the one who looks like he’s been rolling around in the mud and had a blast doing it. The one most women wouldn’t mind rolling around in the mud with.’ Millie said all of this without a hint of surprise evident. Her blue eyes glittered naughtily at her last comment and she smiled. ‘It’s true. A lot of the women around here can be found swooning over him. He doesn’t have any of it though, doesn’t even acknowledge it. I love a man like that, don’t you? Hard to reach. The shell around him impossible to crack.’
‘You know him then?’ Maria tried not to appear too interested in Millie’s answer. She had to admit though, he did look a little untidy but not in an unpleasant way. In quite an appealing way, actually. She wanted to look in his direction again but also didn’t want to risk being caught. The look he’d thrown in her direction minutes ago hadn’t been an inviting one.
‘Vaguely,’ Millie shrugged in reply. ‘He works at Meadow Farm. It’s right up the lane beside the café. He’s not around much, I guess he likes to keep to himself. It looks like he’s had a change of heart this evening though. You don’t see him out and about that often. I wouldn’t blame you if you were admiring him, by the way. Don’t worry, I won’t judge. He’s quite yummy to look at. He’s definitely got that whole rough-and-rugged look going on, hasn’t he?’
Maria took the information in quickly, then rolled her eyes. ‘I was not admiring him. I was merely curious as to who was sat at the table, that’s all. After what I’ve been through, I should be sworn off men for life. How old is he
anyway? He looks about your age.’
‘No way. Couple of years older than me. Mid-thirties, I think. He’s got a nerve showing up here though.’ Millie glanced out across the lake and watched the ducks gliding across the surface of the water. It was a pretty scene, but Maria was still thinking about what Millie had just said. She’d always been a curious person, and this man was igniting that curiosity this evening, although she couldn’t put her finger on why. She’d never been the type of woman swayed purely by good looks. She was of the frame of mind that it was what was on the inside that counted. Still, a little admiration never hurt anyone, and coupled with her beer-fuelled mind, she couldn’t seem to help herself.
She hadn’t fancied many men in her lifetime, Maria realised. Sure, there’d been the odd celebrity crush, but they were just a silly fantasy that she’d sometimes entertain. She’d spent her life from the age of sixteen upwards ridiculously devoted to Mike. He could never have done any wrong in Maria’s eyes, and she thought that was another reason why she’d been so shocked by the truth. She’d been under the impression that she’d known her husband inside and out, believed that he’d never keep a secret from her, no matter what. That’s what marriage was about, wasn’t it? Loyalty, honesty and trust? It turned out that they hadn’t had any of those things, and she wondered whether this affair, the one that had broken their marriage apart, had been the first, or one of many? She’d never know now.
‘What do you mean?’ Maria glanced again in Brad’s direction but pulled her gaze away just as quickly. ‘Why would he have a nerve coming here?’ It seemed like an odd thing for Millie to say, and she was interested to know more about the mysterious man across the way.
Millie shrugged. ‘I’m not entirely sure of what happened but apparently, according to local gossip, which I don’t participate in by the way, he used to go out with Sophie, and Sophie’s parents are the people who own this pub. She used to live here with them. I can’t say one hundred percent that what everyone says is true, you know what it’s like in a small place like this. A game of Chinese whispers, and the story grows more outrageous with every mouth that adds to it. But there’s supposedly bad blood between Brad and her parents.’ She made quote marks with her fingers around the words ‘bad blood’. ‘Something happened and ever since, Brad isn’t exactly made to feel welcome.’
‘Does Sophie still live here?’ asked Maria, glancing about foolishly, as if Sophie herself would pop up from out of the bushes and yell ‘surprise!’
‘No, she moved away a good few years ago, I think, and apparently got married last summer. Still, I suppose they can’t stop him from coming to the pub for a pint, can they? Free will and all that. My guess is he broke her heart. Bit of a cliché but that’s all I can come up with on the matter. They were together for years, you know. Stupidly in love. You’d always see them walking by the lake together, feeding the ducks. It was like something out of a movie. Everyone was shocked when they broke up and Brad sort of disappeared from Loland Green for a while. No one knows where he went but when he finally returned, he kept away from everyone, which is why I’m surprised to see him here. And with friends, too! I didn’t even know he had any, he spends that much time on his own.’ She snorted into her glass and Maria realised that the beer was beginning to have its effects on Millie.
Maria wondered where Brad had gone during the period in which he’d vanished. Was it a bit like her situation, she wondered. Where she’d come to Daffodil Lane to sort herself out? ‘Interesting,’ she murmured. ‘It’s sad that they broke up though, if they were as happy as you said they were. Relationships aren’t the same these days, are they?’
‘Don’t say that,’ Millie groaned. ‘I’m still holding out hope for a knight in shining armour. I’ve always been chasing after that fairy-tale, happy-ever-after.’ She laughed at herself, slightly tipsy if her flushed cheeks and unsteady sway on the seat were anything to go by.
‘You’ll get your knight in shining armour, I’m sure of it.’ Maria nodded firmly. ‘You’re lovely. In fact,’ she lowered her voice to a whisper, ‘if I’m right, one of those lads at Brad’s table keeps sneaking glances at you. He’s been doing so since you went inside to get the last drinks.’
Millie frowned. ‘Really?’
‘Really,’ Maria insisted. ‘He’s wearing the light green top with beige shorts. Can you see him? He’s sat next to Brad. Quite handsome, actually.’
Millie peered in the table’s direction. She scanned the four men. ‘God, I don’t even know what I’d do if a man tried to flirt with me these days, it’s been that long. I’d probably run screaming into the hills.’
Once the drinks were finished, they grabbed their belongings and headed back towards town. The sky had darkened just a little bit but the air was still warm as they strolled, neither one of them rushing to end the evening. They hadn’t walked very far when they heard shouting from behind them. Millie turned and, having seen who it was, tugged on Maria’s arm in panic.
‘Oh my God, it’s him,’ she hissed. ‘What on earth is he doing? Have we forgotten anything?’ She began to rummage through her bag to make sure she’d picked up everything from their table, until the familiar face of the man who’d been checking Millie out for most of the night arrived in front of them.
‘Hi. Sorry,’ he panted, once he was stood in front of a stricken Millie. He leant forward with his hands on his thighs to catch his breath. ‘Didn’t mean to chase you down but… Well, I wanted to ask for your number. Maybe we could go for a drink sometime? Only if you fancy it, though. And if you’re single, obviously. I mean, you don’t have to…’ He trailed off nervously, rubbing the back of his neck.
‘Erm…’ Millie floundered. She looked at Maria for a moment, who nodded firmly, her eyes wide as if to say ‘what are you waiting for?’ ‘Sure, why not? That’d be nice.’ Millie reeled off her number and he tapped it into his phone wearing a small smile. He had lovely blue eyes and a crop of dark hair, Maria noticed. Very handsome indeed.
‘My name’s Harvey, by the way,’ he said. ‘I’m Brad’s cousin. Brad who works at the farm?’
‘Oh yes, I know of Brad. And I’m Millie.’
‘Well, thanks for that Millie. Sorry to chase you. I didn’t want to let you get away. I didn’t know whether I’d see you again.’
Millie blushed and looked down at the floor, suddenly shy. ‘Not at all. I’m flattered that you wanted my number.’ Slowly, she raised her eyes to look back at him. It seemed to have the desired effect because Harvey bit down on his lower lip.
He nodded quickly, shaking off Millie’s magic. ‘Of course I’d want your number. Look at you.’ He stopped and snorted at himself. ‘Wow. I can’t believe I just said that. Right, well. I better get back to the pub. They’ll be wondering where I got to. I’ll give you a call soon to arrange a date.’
‘Sure, that sounds great. See you.’
They watched Harvey head back in the direction of the pub, then Millie slowly turned to Maria and gasped. ‘That’s never happened to me before in my life,’ she whispered. ‘Not once. Not ever. I didn’t know where to put myself.’
‘It’s about time you had a bit of flattery and attention,’ Maria said with a nod. ‘You’re absolutely gorgeous.’
They walked back towards town and stopped outside Harriet’s café, before splitting up to go in their separate directions home.
‘Tonight’s been great. I’ve really enjoyed it. Thanks for asking me, Millie. It’s been a while since I’ve done something as normal as sit outside a pub and chat. Sounds silly doesn’t it? But I think it was just what I needed.’ Maria grinned. It was the first night out she’d had in a long time and it had felt good to be in Millie’s company. She was enjoying being here in Loland Green already, and could tell that she’d made a new friend in Millie. They just seemed to gel really well together, and after learning more about Millie and the life she’d lived so far, Maria had warmed towards her even more. She wanted so badly for someone to sweep Millie off
her feet because she felt that the woman deserved it. All in all, a wonderful evening had been had by the both of them.
‘We must do it again sometime,’ Millie enthused with a pretty smile. ‘I’ve had a fantastic night. I better get home and let Mum go. She’s probably knackered after taking care of Susie all afternoon. I’ll see you soon, Maria. Goodnight.’
‘You better answer the phone if Harvey calls!’ Maria shouted after her once Millie had started to walk off.
‘I will,’ Millie called back. Her laughter danced in the air merrily as she headed home.
With a laugh, Maria waved her off and began the short walk back to Daffodil Lane, feeling light and happy and completely free of worries and troubles. It was a feeling she hadn’t felt for a long time, but she was delighted to recognise it and hoped it would last. She had a feeling it would, although she didn’t want to jinx it by thinking so. With her new friends, new job and her gorgeous new surroundings, there was no way she could be down in the dumps here. It just didn’t seem possible. In fact, her old life was beginning to feel a world away from the here and now.
Once she was back at the cottage, Maria climbed into bed and smiled to herself in the darkness, tiredness slowly creeping over her as her body melted into the soft mattress. The fresh scent of the sheets wafted up towards her nostrils as she rolled over and tugged the blanket tighter around herself. Despite it being rather warm, she’d never been able to sleep without the blanket tucked around her in this way. She’d done it ever since she was a child.
Millie had been the perfect company that evening. In the summer air, with a few pints of beer in their system, it really had been a wonderful night. Plus, her new hair made her feel fabulous. The faint smell of the hair dye still lingered, but she didn’t care. What mattered most was that she was, slowly but surely, beginning to remember her old self, and even better, beginning to feel like her old self too. Relaxed, Maria drifted off into the easiest sleep she’d had for a while and realised that perhaps life wasn’t so bad after all.