by Sydney Snow
Leaning forward, I pressed the call button on the bed.
“Are you mad at me?” Danica asked, hugging me tighter.
“No.” Returning her embrace, I kissed her on the forehead. “You were only trying to protect me. I know that.”
A nurse in a pair of white scrubs appeared in the doorway. “Did you need something?”
“Yes. My stepmom is feeling better now, and has remembered the death of my sister. I thought perhaps now would be a good time for the doctor to talk with her.” I had to get out of here before I exploded and ended up as a patient myself.
“That’s wonderful news, Mrs. McCord,” the nurse responded, smiling brightly. Then, as if she realized how morbid her remark had sounded, she reined her countenance back in. “Would you like to walk down to the doctor’s office with me?”
Danica glanced at me with a questioning gaze. “Will you wait for me?”
I shook my head. “I need to go do some things; but I promise I’ll be back.”
“Are you sure you’re all right?” she asked again.
“I’ll be fine. I want you to feel better. Go with the nurse.”
“Okay,” she replied, sounding reluctant to leave me. I waited until I heard their footsteps retreating from the hall; then I stood and calmly walked outside to my jeep and climbed inside.
“Gaaarrrrrr!” I shouted, slamming my fist against the steering wheel as anger flooded through me. What the hell was happening to my life? It felt as if the universe had opened some cosmic hole of grief and was pouring it straight out on me, tearing through my soul like acid.
Starting the car, I threw it into reverse and peeled from the space, speeding through the lot and narrowly avoiding a collision as I took off down the road.
Chapter Sixteen
Anna-
“Anna!” Caleb’s voice caught me by surprise as I exited the auditorium. I turned to find him leaning against his Jeep in the parking lot. His mouth was pressed together in a hard set and there was pain in his eyes. Something was wrong. He never showed up here in the middle of the school day to see me.
Hurrying over to him, I set my books on the hood of his Jeep, the sound of cars leaving the parking lot for lunch filling the air around us. “What’s the matter?” I asked, wrapping my arms around him. He pulled me close resting his head against mine.
“I needed to feel you in my arms,” he replied, his voice sounding gruff.
I didn’t press him for answers, knowing he’d tell me when he was ready. I simply let him hold me, while I breathed in the cool scent of his cologne. I loved him so much. It was hard for me to see him hurting and struggling with things.
Suddenly, the date popped into my mind and a feeling of dread shot through me. Pulling away, I stared at him.
“Oh my gosh!” I exclaimed, the sick feeling inside me growing worse. “Your tests came back positive for something, didn’t they?”
Staring at me, confused for a moment, he suddenly burst out laughing. “No. My tests are fine.” He kissed my forehead. “No, that’s not entirely accurate. I mean the results didn’t come in today. They told me to call back on Monday.”
“Oh, thank goodness,” I replied, my words coming in a tumbled rush as I buried my head against his chest. “I’d die if you were sick with something. I think I just lost ten years off my life.”
He sighed. “I certainly hope not. I have plans for you during those ten years.”
The smile that crept across my face was unstoppable. He was talking about our relationship as long term, and it made my heart swell. I couldn’t imagine anything better than spending the rest of my life in Caleb’s arms. “I’m okay with any plans you have for me,” I replied.
“Any?” he asked; and I glanced up to see an evil looking gleam in his eyes.
I punched him in the stomach and pushed away from him. “You know what I mean.”
He started laughing, again. “I do. And I have to say, I was right to come see you. Being around you always cheers me up.”
“Are you going to share with me why you needed cheering? Or are you going to leave me worrying about you?”
Glancing around at the now, nearly empty parking lot, he leaned against his door. “I know you’ve been taking the last of your finals. Do you have more after lunch, or is there any chance I could convince you to ditch for the rest of the day?”
“Actually, I didn’t have any classes with finals today. Monday and Tuesday will be the last of them. As far as ditching, I don’t have to. I am eighteen and totally capable of signing myself out,” I reminded him.
“Are you sure it won’t mess anything up for you?”
“I’m happy to do it.” I winked at him as I retrieved my books from the hood. “Be right back.”
“Hurry. I miss you.” His gaze wandered over me with an appreciative glance and I could feel his eyes on me all the way back into the school. He made me feel pretty when he looked at me like that, as if I were the only girl in the world. Sometimes I still wondered how I’d gotten so lucky.
***
I wasn’t totally surprised when we parked next to the trail that led to the pond. There was a reason Jessi loved it as much as she did. It was a good place to come and reflect.
Caleb came around and helped me from the vehicle, taking my hand. My shoes sunk into the spongy surface on the ground, giving the illusion that there was carpet beneath them.
The damp smell of the forest filled the air and I inhaled deeply, letting it fill me. A slight breeze whispered through the trees, creating a calming sound. I loved this place. Something about it was magical, as if it were a place fairies might come to dance around at night.
Caleb guided me to a flat, damp stone that was nestled between the ferns and reeds at the water’s edge. We sat next to each other, and I curled my knees under my chin, wrapping my arms around them as I stared at the water. There was no trace of Jessi’s ashes, but somehow it comforted me to know she was here.
“I found out Hank isn’t my biological father,” Caleb stated, his words shocking me to my center.
“What? From who?” My mind scrambled to try and process what he was telling me.
“Danica. I went and sat with her this morning.” He plucked a reed from the water and began twirling it between his fingers absently.
“No offense, but she hasn’t exactly been all there lately. Are you sure she’s a reliable source?”
He sighed heavily. “Well, it seems she had a break through back to reality this morning. I left her with the doctor to talk things over and went to the house to confront him myself. He’s working today, apparently, so he wasn’t home. I let myself into the house with my key and went into his room. Danica told me she had seen a letter in his drawer from an attorney that said my biological mom had passed away from an accidental overdose. The letter is still there, just like she said. I’m thinking she’s telling me the truth and it certainly makes sense as to why Hank acts like he hates me.”
“So, he’s known this whole time?” This revelation did make a lot of sense. Hank and Caleb were nothing alike.
“No. I guess he found out when he went to give blood after I cut my arm. We weren’t a match and there was no way he could be my father based on our blood types.”
“Wow.” My heart hurt for him. His life was being completely turned upside down lately. “Do you think your dad knows who your biological father might be?”
He shrugged. “Actually, it never occurred to me to ask him. I assume he was blindsided with the news as well.”
“I only ask because he knows your mom ran off. Maybe she ran off with someone?”
“And left him saddled with her kid? Gee, that was real nice of her. She sounds like a winner too. I’m batting a thousand in the parent department, aren’t I?”
“Danica has always loved you and treated you like her own,” I reminded him.
“I know,” he replied softly. “And I love her. I want her to be happy; and, sadly, I’m afraid my dad—Hank—isn’t ever
going to be that person for her.”
“It’s a decision you’re going to have to let her make on her own, Caleb. You can’t force her to leave him, just like you can’t force him to treat her right. Simply being there for her is all you can do.”
“I’m trying.” He sighed heavily.
“So, how is the news about your dad affecting you?”
He was silent for several moments, before tossing the read out onto the water. “I don’t know, really. I haven’t had much time to process it. I’m thinking I feel a bit lost, though, like part of my identity is missing—as if who I am isn’t real.”
“Not knowing your natural parents doesn’t make you any less “real”. You’re good man with a big heart—a blessing in the eyes of many.”
Studying me carefully, he leaned in closer. “Am I a blessing to you, Anna? Because right now, that’s all that matters to me.”
Smiling at him, I slipped my fingers through his. “You’re more than a blessing in my life. There aren’t enough words in creation to tell you what you mean to me.”
Gaze traveling to my lips, he continued to close the gap in between us. “I feel the same way.” Pressing his mouth against mine, he released my hand, moving it to my shoulders as he pressed me backward into the soft mound of moss on the ground behind us. It was damp, but I didn’t care. I adjusted my position so he could lie beside me.
His lips were warm, like sunshine, and I wanted to drink him in as our breaths mingled together. Sparks of awareness shot through me,; every place where his body came in contact with mine felt even more sensitive than usual.
Time stood still and the sensation of being the only two people in existence filled me. I wanted to stay lost in his strong embrace, feeling his tongue in my mouth while his free hand traveled down my body, forever.
Like a virtuoso plucking all the right strings of his instrument, he played me as expertly as he did his guitar. My body was singing, soft musical moans escaping my mouth, as our kissing grew more fevered. Suddenly, I wanted to do the same to him—to make him feel as enraptured as he made me feel.
Pushing at his shoulders, he rolled onto his back, taking me with him, so I was leaning over him. I straddled him carefully, unable to help my smile as a groan escaped his lips. Staring at me through heavily lidded eyes, his gaze traveled over my face, pausing at my mouth before reaching up to stroke my lips with his thumb.
“I like it when your lips are swollen because you’ve been kissing me.”
“I like that too,” I whispered in reply, leaning closer to him. He lifted his chin, raising his mouth to meet mine, but I ducked my head under his chin, sucking there, much the same as he often did to me.
Feeling the rumble of approval deep in his chest, I trailed lower, allowing my hand to slide under his shirt, caressing the warm skin of his sculpted abdomen. His muscles clenched under my touch and his grip tightened on me, his hands grabbing my butt and pulling me down against his hips grinding against me.
“Oh,” I gasped at the intimate gesture, realizing that perhaps I was better at playing this game than I thought I would be. Shifting, I sat up, which proved to only increase the contact of our lower bodies.
“You’re killing me, Anna.” He breathed heavily.
Smiling back at him, I felt powerful, like a seductress hunting her prey. “It’s awfully beautiful here, don’t you think? A perfect place for our first time together.”
Caleb’s eyes widened as big as golf balls. “Are you serious? What about the test results?”
I couldn’t help the laugh that escaped me, immediately realizing he’d let me go all the way, if that’s what I wanted. It must’ve been hard for him to hold back this long, just to put my concerns to rest.
“No, I’m not serious about right now. You don’t have any protection.” I reminded him.
“You wanna bet?” he responded. “Check my wallet.”
“Are you kidding me?” I asked, laughing. “You brought one with you?”
“Oh, there’s more than one in there,” he replied with a grin, lifting his hands to run them over my shoulders and down my arms. “I wasn’t taking any chances on not being prepared when you finally said yes.”
“Wow.” I was speechless. “So, what now?”
“The ball’s in your court, baby. You give the word and I’ll treat you to the best show possible. Or, we can keep waiting for those damn test results, which I’m pretty sure will be clean, by the way.”
Sighing, I rolled off him before the temptation grew too great for me. “As much as I’d like that, Caleb, I think we better wait. It’s not because I don’t trust you though. It’s that I don’t want to rush our first time together; and we have a gig in just a few hours.”
He sighed heavily. “I know; and honestly, I’ve been thinking the same thing, but you have a way of getting under my skin. In case you didn’t notice.”
Laughing, I glanced down the length of him. “It’s kind of hard not to notice.”
Grinning, he made no move to apologize. “I hope you’re finding it to your liking.”
“So far so good,” I responded with a slight giggle as he dragged me back to him.
“Good to know,” he replied as he kissed me again.
Chapter Seventeen
Anna-
It was incredible how fast the cheerleaders pulled the event together. The football field was littered with craft booths, face painting, inflated jumping stations for kids, video game trailers, and food vendors that were filling the air with delicious aromas. From hot dogs to pizza to corn on the cob and fried zucchini, I couldn’t decide which to try first. My mouth watered as Caleb and I strolled through the fair-like atmosphere.
“I wish Danica could see all this,” I said in awe. “She would be amazed.” Pausing by a jewelry booth, I traced over a beautiful silver necklace with an Opalite Rainbow Moonstone teardrop.
“How much for this necklace?” Caleb asked the vendor.
“Twenty-five dollars.”
“I’ll take it. No need to wrap it. My girlfriend can wear it right now.”
“You didn’t have to do that,” I said. “But, thank you. I love it.”
“It will look beautiful on you.”
“You picked a very good time to purchase this,” the man added, as he handed the necklace to Caleb.
“Really? Why’s that?”
“Because, tonight is the full moon stage of the Lunar Cycle. It’s said that the moonstone is the stone of the Greek goddess, Diana, and who gives a moonstone to their love during the full moon will always have a life of passion, love and good luck.”
“That’s so beautiful,” I said as Caleb brushed my hair over my shoulder and fastened the necklace around me. He bent and kissed the curve of my neck when he was finished.
“I can handle a lifetime of passion with you; but are you sure you want me that long?”
“How can you even joke about that?” I asked, turning in his arms and hopping up on my tiptoes to give him a kiss on the mouth. “I can’t think of anything I’d rather have.”
Glancing back toward the vendor, I saw he was smiling widely at both of us.
“Do you have any crystals that promote mental health?” Immediately, he reached for a green pendant, lifting it for me to examine.
“Emerald is a soothing tranquilizer for minds that are troubled and will help to bring wisdom and reason to those who wear it.”
“That’s pretty,” Caleb said. “We’ll take that too, but please gift wrap it, if you can.”
“Not a problem at all, sir.” The man began packaging it for us.
“Your mom will love this,” I said, accepting the package from the vendor.
“I think so too. And it will be nice to bring her something from the event. She’s doing a lot better, but the doctor felt that being around all these people, giving her condolences, would be too overwhelming for her. I agreed completely. She’s barely started acknowledging Jessi’s death,. I figured there’s no reason to push her.�
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“That’s probably pretty wise. Any word on how long they’ll keep her there?.”
He shrugged. “She doesn’t really have anywhere to go, right now. They think my dad’s behavior helped to trigger her episode, so it’s not exactly a safe place to send her back to. I can’t bring her to the loft, since all the guys are renting the other rooms.”
“What about moving and getting a place to share with her. Would that work?” I asked, slipping my hand as we continued our stroll.
“I’d have to break my lease. That would cost a lot.”
“What about subletting to someone else, or having them take over your lease? Are you allowed to do that?”
“I’d need to get permission from the management company, but it can be kind of difficult for a complete stranger to move in and share a house with my crazy roommates. Things can get pretty wild around there, as you well know. I’m afraid it might cause some problems.”
I nodded. “I can totally see what you mean.”
“Have you talked to Hank about it?”
Caleb sighed heavily. “No. I haven’t called, because I wanted to meet him face to face. This isn’t a discussion to have on the phone.”
“Does he even know about this event?”
“I honestly have no idea,; but it looks like there is a pretty good turn out,” he replied, looking around. Evidently it got advertised well.”
“They’ve done a great job,” I agreed. “It’s obvious people are very sympathetic to Jessi’s situation.”
“I’m grateful for the outpouring, but I’d much rather have her here.”
“Me, too.” I slipped my arm around his waist and squeezed him tighter. He casually draped his arm across my shoulders, returning my embrace.
“I love you,” he added, placing a light kiss at my temple. “Thanks for everything you do for me.”
“Hmm. Not sure what you mean, but I’m happy to help any way I can.”