by Aurelia Skye
She nodded, keeping the motion of her head brisk and doing her best to hide any hint of disappointment at the thought. It was ridiculous to be concerned about missing him when he left, especially since he had barely arrived, and he was nothing more to her than a diplomatic contact. “Let me show you to your room then.”
Chapter Two
JSN had spent a restless night in his new quarters. They were small and slightly cramped, but certainly functional. The bunk had been a little firm, but he had slept on worse. It wasn’t the accommodations that had kept him up most of the night so much as the knowledge that Gwen Harrison was in the room beside his.
He couldn’t explain why that had kept him awake, or why he’d been so restless and on edge. It made sense to be on his guard in a new location filled with people who had been his enemy until just yesterday, but that hadn’t been the direction his thoughts had taken.
Instead, they had dwelled on the expanse of creamy brown skin revealed by Gwen’s short-sleeved tunic, along with his thoughts returning almost obsessively to the plumpness of her lips. More than once throughout the night, he’d wondered how it would feel to run his fingers through the kinky dark curls framing her face and falling to below her shoulders. Everything about the human leader intrigued him, and it was unusual, but not unpleasant.
All he knew were his thoughts had left him restless and aroused, unable to find sleep even after seeking relief from his hand. He had sought release with other cyborgs, and his fractured memories of being human revealed he’d had a wife, and surely he had been intimate with her before his death as a human and conversion to a cyborg. He didn’t have enough memories to clearly ascertain that, but what he knew of marriage told him he must have been attracted to his wife and explored her sexually.
Despite knowing he must have had that experience, he had no memory of it, so this unexpected attraction to Gwen Harrison felt completely alien. It wasn’t like the baser desires that led him to find pleasure with another cyborg. When he met with those women, it was all about release for both of them, with nothing else to it. This was definitely different, and the idea of taking Gwen to his bed excited him, while the thought of a quick fuck with her before moving on unsettled him.
Perhaps it had nothing to do with Gwen herself. Maybe he was just envious of the bond DVS had formed with Carrie when the Celestial Mates agent had dropped her almost literally in DVS’s lap after ripping the human woman from four hundred and thirty years in the past to bring her to their grim present. He wasn’t attracted to Carrie at all, but seeing how happy she made DVS definitely inspired more than a hint of envy.
He was no closer to knowing or discerning why his thoughts kept returning to Gwen as he left his quarters a few minutes later. Gwen and her children were nowhere to be found, at least not in the corridor, but he followed the flow of people moving down the hallway toward what he was certain was the main area where the humans gathered.
He didn’t miss the way most of them steered clear of him, some freezing in fear until he passed, and others shooting glares at him. It was an uncomfortable experience, but he reminded himself they had all been enemies until just yesterday. It was bound to take time for attitudes on both sides to change, and all he could do was show them he meant to do them no harm. As long as they maintained the same stance, he was confident his time as liaison to the enclave would be productive.
The humans were assembled for their morning nourishment break, and he joined the line after observing how it seemed to function for a moment. When he reached the stack, he took a tray and joined the group actively receiving food. The humans spooning it out avoided looking at him, and the one in the middle seemed to hesitate before giving him a serving of something thin and gray, with a greenish cast. He almost hoped she would withhold his portion, but accepted it with a smile that she didn’t see because she refused to look up as she plopped it on his tray.
Once JSN had his breakfast, he paused and looked around the room. The posture of everyone indicated none of them would welcome him sitting at their table. Fortunately, there was a small table in the corner that no one else had claimed. He walked over to it and positioned himself so he could see the entire room with the wall at his back. He didn’t expect any of the humans to mount a sudden surprise attack on him, but years of training had left a mark, and the position was natural.
He scooped up a bite of the unknown substance, gazing closely at it for a moment as he tried to ascertain what its ingredients were. He placed a cautious bite in his mouth, allowing his sensors to determine the components. It was some kind of grain mixed with a variant of algae, and his analysis told him it had all the nutritional requirements for a human.
He didn’t need his cybernetic sensors to tell him it was bland. His human taste buds worked just fine for that, and he ate as quickly as he could. He was nearing the final bite when he became aware of a gaze on him. He looked up and around, at first seeing no one. It wasn’t until the chair on the other side of the table scraped and a small human climbed into it that he realized it was one of the children from yesterday. He gave the boy a cautious smile, not wanting to frighten him. “Good morning.”
“Morning,” echoed the boy. “Why is your skin blue?”
“The nutrients going through my veins make my skin blue.” There was more to it than that, but he didn’t know how to explain the engineering design of his skin to the little boy.
“Why are you so tall?”
JSN chuckled. “I’m not really that tall, and this is the height I was when I was still a human.”
“How did you become a cyborg?”
“I was a soldier, and I was injured in battle. The Reins Act had recently passed, and that stole my ability to refuse to become a cyborg. As far as they were concerned, I was military property, and they intended to keep it that way even after I was injured to the point of death. If they had let me die, it would’ve been a waste of a good cyborg.” He struggled to keep his tone light and not allow any of his bitterness to leak through. If the Reins Act had been even a distant possibility when he had first signed up for the military, he would’ve never enlisted.
“Where do cyborgs come from?”
“A scientist—do you know what a scientist is?”
The little boy looked solemn for a moment, and then his wild curls bounced when he nodded. “Like Heather and Leith. They do science stuff in their labs.”
He hadn’t met either one of the people mentioned, but he assumed that was a close enough definition. “I imagine your friends, Leith and Heather, are good scientists, but Frankel wasn’t such a nice guy. He made cyborgs, and then when cyborgs wanted their freedom, he came up with synthetics. I guess you could say he’s the reason we’re all here now.”
The boy frowned. “I’ve never seen a synthetic. Mama says they’re scary, and I wouldn’t want to see one, but I do. I really want to see one. Will you show me?”
JSN started to refuse, having no intention of taking the boy out of the relative safety of the enclave. Then he realized he could call up an image from his databanks to show the boy through his wrist comm. He spent a moment filtering through the images that came to him, seeking one that was more informational than terror-inducing. He finally found one that was benign and brought it up before extending his wrist to the child.
The boy was clearly fearless, grabbing hold of JSN’s hand and climbing up on the table so he could see better. As he positioned himself to lean forward and look at the screen, he spent a moment grinning at JSN. “Thanks.”
“You’re welcome.” His voice was unexpectedly husky, and there was a catch in his chest. Warmth spread through him, and he couldn’t explain it. Immediately, he activated his sensors and did a self-diagnostic. There was a scant possibility that perhaps the humans carried a virus with which he was unfamiliar and unexposed, so his database would have no defenses against it. When the results returned as nominal, he frowned, but shrugged off the sensation.
“Pollux Stephen Harrison, what do you th
ink you’re doing?”
JSN and the boy both stiffened, him from surprise, and Pollux from what appeared to be guilt. He didn’t climb off the table, but he did look up at his mother as Gwen joined them. The small child seemed even smaller when he huddled in misery. “I’m sorry, Mama. I was just so excited to see the cyborg—”
“Our guest,” she inserted in a testy voice. “Excitement doesn’t give you permission to run off. You need to stay with me or Britta at all times, even in the enclave. What if there was another earthquake?”
JSN bit back a grin at the boy’s deep sigh, which suggested he was weary with the topic. “I know, Mama. I’m sorry, and I won’t do it again.”
JSN expected her to issue some sort of discipline or punishment, so as she lifted the boy off the table and gave him a hug and a kiss on the cheek, it startled him. If a cyborg or soldier disobeyed orders, there were clear consequences for such actions.
As soon as she set the boy on his feet, Pollux turned back to JSN. “Can I sit with you at dinner?”
“Of course,” said JSN before his mother could answer. “You and your sister and your mother would all be welcome to sit with me.”
With a small whoop, Pollux ran off, and it was clear his destination was Britta, who stood in the breakfast line waiting for him with an expression of weary impatience on her face.
“You didn’t punish him.”
Gwen frowned at him as she took a step closer. “Why should I punish him? It was a reminder not to run away.”
He shrugged. “When cyborgs disobey direct orders, we have to face the consequences of our actions. That’s why MX409 is currently locked in the brig at our base.”
Gwen’s eyes widened, reminding him of how beautiful the deep chocolate depths were. “There are quite a few differences. Pollux is a four-year-old child who needs a reminder. MX409 is a homicidal cyborg.”
“I don’t believe he was homicidal. I’m not certain what motivated him, but I know MX. He isn’t the type to just kill without provocation.”
Her lips pursed, and she look like she wanted to argue. “You know him better than I do, and I know my son far better than you, so I don’t appreciate the criticism.”
Immediately, JSN put up his hands. “Please don’t misunderstand. I wasn’t trying to criticize how you handled it. I was simply curious.”
Before she could reply, Britta and Pollux came to stand beside her. Britta held out a tray to her mother before giving JSN a cold look and turning her back on him to walk away with her little brother in tow. Pollux was waving behind himself in JSN’s direction.
That child certainly didn’t leave a warm feeling in his chest like the little boy did.
He was almost startled when Gwen sat down in the free chair at the table, clearly planning to eat what passed as breakfast in his company. He regretted that he had almost finished his plate, though he was glad to be rid of the task of swallowing the food. “The boy makes me feel welcome. There’s warmth in my chest when I interact with him. The girl makes me want to pull away and leave. She’s most unwelcoming.”
He could tell right away he had offended her by the way she drew up, her spine rigid, and her expression changing. “You have no idea what my daughter has been through, or any of us have gone through, and you have no right to judge her for her reactions. She’s been forced to grow up far too quickly after the loss of her father.”
JSN nodded, struggling for a conciliatory tone. “I meant no censure. I was simply offering an observation on my emotional reaction to the children. As their mother, do your offspring give you different feelings about each of them?”
After a moment, her expression softened slightly, and her ire seemed to fade. “You’re just genuinely curious, aren’t you?” She didn’t bother to wait for him to reply. “The answer is, it depends. At different times, they both make me feel different things and in different ways. There’s joy and frustration, pride, fear, and a love so intense I can’t even begin to describe it.”
“Cyborgs don’t have children.”
She frowned. “I don’t recall reading that from the files. Did Frankel deliberately design the process to render all cyborg sterile?”
JSN shook his head. “Most of us are capable of reproduction, unless the original damages left us missing the key physical component. We choose not to. Our resources are carefully allocated, and as long as we have sufficient numbers to fight the synthetics, we prefer not to bring in a new generation to endure what we’ve gone through.”
Her shoulders drew up, and she looked defensive. “It’s not always as easy as just planning or not planning. Sometimes, accidents happen.”
“Is that how you became a mother?”
She scowled at him. “Britta wasn’t an accident. She was just…unexpected. Stephen and I were probably too young, but we did okay. When he started talking about having a second child, I relented. I was reluctant at first, but he wanted it so badly.” Her expression shifted to one of sadness. “At least he got a few months with Pollux before he was killed.”
“Does your enclave carefully plan and balance reproduction?” It was a deliberately unemotional question designed to chase the sadness from her expression. He couldn’t explain why exactly, but seeing her suffering caused a rush of sadness within himself as well.
“Not exactly, but there are fewer children born every generation. It’s probably due to a combination of factors—the choice of people not to reproduce in these stark circumstances, the environment itself, and perhaps even a nutritional basis for some level of infertility due to lack of variety in our food. Maybe it’s just the lack of sunshine and fresh air, though I never saw those things in my lifetime.”
JSN looked at the last spoon of food on his tray that he hadn’t yet managed to convince himself to consume. “This is all the food you have?”
“At the moment, yes. Our aquaponics equipment malfunctioned last season, so we have no fresh food.”
Thinking of the atrium back at base, filled with fresh fruits and vegetables, he winced at their lack of supplies. “Perhaps I can fix your aquaponics machinery.”
She seemed startled by the suggestion before nodding. “I don’t see any reason for you not to try. Leith did his best, but he lacked some of the components and the necessary knowledge. It’s probably a miracle he managed to keep it limping along for the length of time he has.”
“After breakfast, perhaps you could show me where it is?”
She nodded. “I had planned to give you a tour of the enclave anyway. I’m certain you’re supposed to report back to your general about what you see, and we have nothing to hide.”
JSN didn’t bother to offer reassurance that he wasn’t there to report back to DVS. There was no point in lying to her. “I’d be pleased to have the tour then.”
With what appeared to be remarkable fortitude, Gwen quickly shoveled down the rest of the food on her tray before standing up. He followed her to take their trays to the same spot, and then she paused on the way out of the cafeteria to speak quietly to her children. When she rejoined him at the doorway, she seemed slightly more relaxed. Clearly, speaking with her offspring did a lot to soothe her.
“Are you ready?”
He nodded. “Please lead me.”
Following behind her assured he was going the right direction, but it also offered an unexpected perk, which was the sight of her heart-shaped bottom and curvy hips encased in loose-fitting homespun pants. They couldn’t completely camouflage the perfection of her shape, and more than once he had to stifle the urge to reach forward to cup her buttocks in his hands. He was certain the human leader would not appreciate such a gesture, and he didn’t want to risk damaging the fragile attempt at peace between their people just because her lush ass was tempting.
In an effort to tear himself away from the temptation, he looked up and around, paying attention to his surroundings as he was supposed to. At first, he noticed the structure and different functions of the rooms she showed him, but it didn’t
take him long to realize that any human they passed scurried on by and quickly avoided looking at him. Some seemed to fear him, while others had a different reaction. He was certain there was anger and resentment among them, but it was difficult to ascertain a human’s emotions based purely on the signs that his sensors could read—temperature, heart rate, and facial expression.
Gwen stopped in front of another door just as a small group of women hurried past. They withdrew, pressing against the far side of the rough wall as hard as they could while they passed him.
He looked down in surprise when her hand rested briefly on his chest before looking up to meet her gaze, which was full of sympathy.
“You have to give them time to get accustomed to you. They’re bound to be afraid. No one in the enclave besides a couple of people close to me knew I was sending out the transmissions, or that I’d hoped to make peace with the cyborgs so we could defeat the synthetics together. To a lot of these people, their mindset is we’re still at war, and your people are someone to fear.”
He folded his hand around hers, ignoring the slight resistance when she tried to pull away before accepting his touch and allowing her fingers to curl against his. “I understand that, and I appreciate you trying to make me feel better about the situation. All I can do is show them I’m not a threat. I have no intention of harming anyone.”
“I didn’t think you did, or I wouldn’t let you stay.” There was a hitch in her breathing as she spoke.
He traced his thumb across the tip of hers. “This is nice.”
She cleared her throat. “What is?”
“This connection between us. It makes my chest felt warm; similar to the way Pollux made me feel, but also completely different.”
She tugged at her hand again. “Cyborgs don’t hold hands?”
He shook his head. “Not usually. We seek each other for pleasure and comfort, but that’s just sex. There’s never something more…something like this.”