by Jade West
Carrie looks worried for him. She’s dithery as she flits about the kitchen, making up a fresh pot of coffee as we talk.
I smile to see the mud stains on the knees of her jeans. They suit her.
“What you gonna do?” I ask Mike, and he shakes his head.
“I don’t know,” he says. “What can I do?”
“You can quit,” I tell him. “Find something to do where you don’t have your hands tied with crappy budgets and tick boxes.”
He holds up the job page. “That’s exactly what I’m doing, but there’s not much out there where I’ll be genuinely able to make a difference for a living. In fact, there’s fuck all.”
Another job’s not quite what I mean, but he carries on scanning the ads obliviously.
I watch Carrie as she pours the coffee, noticing the way she glows after a good day of work on the land.
She’s nothing like the hissing little bitch I walked in on just a few weeks ago. She’s nothing that any of her previous carers would recognise.
And that’s not from Jack’s little sessions with her every week, talking her through her options in a stuffy little office.
It’s this place, it suits her. We suit her. And as much as I’d like to think it’s a good hard fucking that brings her in line, that has little to do with it.
Trust, responsibility, hard work and a little bit of freedom along with a healthy amount of discipline. Those things have everything to do with it.
And love.
That has the most to do with it of all.
Love and respect.
I have an idea exactly what Michael can do with the rest of his career, but I don’t blurt it out right then and there.
It’s going to take some careful thinking about first.
“You’ll sort something out,” I tell him and he smiles sadly.
“I’ll have to, I can’t work under those conditions, and I won’t.”
I nod.
He closes the newspaper as our beautiful girl brings us coffee, and the topic is officially closed.
Chapter Twenty-Five
Carrie
I hate seeing Michael so sad. I don’t understand all of it, but I know it’s bad, and I know it’s about work.
I also know how hard he tried to work with me when I was sitting across his desk every week. He’s good with people. He cares.
Even if that place is stuffy and snooty and no good for people like me.
I don’t think now’s the time to tell him that, so I keep my mouth shut and do what I can do, which is mainly make coffee.
He closes his newspaper and pulls me tight against him as I dish out the drinks, and it’s nice to feel him smile against my cheek.
“I’m sorry,” he says, “I don’t mean to seem miserable. I’ve been looking forward to seeing you.”
I nod. “I’ve been looking forward to seeing you, too.” I look over at Jack. “Both of you.”
I love how Michael’s arm feels around my waist. I love the smell of him in his suit.
He’s wearing the tie I bought him and it makes me feel proud.
“Did they say anything?” I ask. “About me, I mean? Did you get into trouble for helping me?”
“No, it’s all good,” he says and I’m relieved.
I’m glad I’m not going to cost him the job he loves, not yet anyway. But from the gist of their conversation, it seems as though it’s on the rocks regardless.
I’m sure I’m the only one in this room who wouldn’t think it a tragedy if he couldn’t do it anymore, but they don’t see what I see.
They don’t see the snooty looks as you walk through reception, or the way you’re so aware the clock is ticking every time you try to talk through something.
Being here, on this land, holds more value to anyone than that office ever will, but I don’t think Michael will see that right now.
“You came straight back,” I say to him. “Does that mean you’re staying for good now?”
“I don’t have my suits here,” he says and Jack answers before I do.
“Pack a case then,” he tells him.
“And move in?” Michael laughs, but Jack isn’t joking, and I’m not joking either as I nod.
“Please,” I say. “I want you with us. Provided it’s ok with Jack, of course.”
Michael shakes his head. “I think there’s a bit of a road ahead before we start talking plans like that.”
He waits for us to agree but we don’t.
Not me and not Jack.
Michael sighs into my neck. “Enough of my shitty day,” he says. “Tell me about yours.”
I do tell him. I tell him how the top paddock needed some serious fixes.. I tell him how I fixed it and how I’ll be done with all of the fences before the week’s out.
“Time for chickens then,” he says, and Jack smirks from across the table.
“She’ll need to build herself a hen house first.”
My heart soars at the thought. I can do it, I know I can. I just need some wood and nails and online videos.
“I’ll build it,” I say. “I’ll build the greatest hen house you’ve ever seen.”
“I don’t doubt it,” he says. “And when you have, we’ll get you some chickens to fill it with. We’ll go to Coleford poultry market and you can pick them out.”
“And then the sheep next,” Michael says and Jack raises an eyebrows.
“We’ll see how the chickens go first,” he says.
And I can’t stop smiling, even though I’m grinning my head off, because I know that the chickens are going to go really fucking fine.
Michael
Loving Carrie Wells is everything I thought it would be. More than I thought it would be.
Because the Carrie Wells who snapped and sneered at me every week in my office has transformed into a girl who’s everything I knew she could be.
Even more than I knew she could be.
I know I said packing my clothes and bringing them here would be way too soon, but here, in bed, with Carrie snuggled into my side and Jack pressed up against the back of her, it feels anything but soon.
It feels like all roads led here, even if I didn’t know it before it happened.
The whole town undoubtedly knows Carrie is here, even if they didn’t even know where here was before now.
Jack’s house will have been discussed and pointed out, questions raised over just what’s going on between the man they know makes a shit ton of money out of insurance, and the mouthy little gypsy girl they shake their head at in the street.
But I don’t care.
My job is the only string left holding me to any of their unwanted opinions, and that string is fraying before my eyes with every budget cut.
I think this one will be the final one I can take. I’m going to hand in my notice to coincide with my existing case load winding down, and beyond that I have no idea yet.
I’m sure something will come up, even as an interim measure.
I shouldn’t respond to Carrie’s kisses, because we all have things to do in the morning.
I shouldn’t roll onto my side to press my cock against her belly because I’m dooming us all to a night of fucking and sucking until the dawn rises through the crack in Jack’s curtains, but I can’t stop.
She’s addictive.
She’s gentle as she takes me in her hand and squeezes. I hear Jack’s breathing quicken and I know she must be squeezing him too.
Carrie Wells is insatiable and I don’t recognise myself when I’m around her. I’m beginning to realise that’s no bad thing.
My life is changing in every way, my career catapulting into unknown waters alongside this new crazy setup we’ve got going on. So many considerations to take into account, so many questions that we’ll need to answer down the line.
But that’s not for now.
Now is all about giving Carrie what she needs, and right now she needs two men to take her and make her theirs.
I slip my fingers bet
ween her thighs and find Jack’s already there. I don’t even flinch, just work my fingers along with his, teasing that hard little clit until she moans. Jack pushes his fingers inside her first, and when she’s bucking under our hands and begging for more, I slide mine right along in there next to his.
Our dirty girl stretches so nicely for us. That tight little pussy sucks on our fingers, greedy for whatever we offer.
I kiss her neck in the darkness, feeling Jack’s breath on my cheek as he does the same. Her hand works my dick so slowly I could go insane, but it’s bliss. Absolute pure fucking bliss.
And then she tugs, shifting us closer, and I go with it, we both do.
I don’t realise what’s happening until it’s too late, until I can feel the heat of Jack’s body so close, Carrie’s wriggling underneath us as she spreads her legs and asks for deeper.
I recoil instinctively as my dick touches another dick, jerking back my hips as though I’ve been burned.
“Please,” she breathes. “I want you both inside me, both at once…”
Understanding doesn’t ease the frantic beat of my heart.
Understanding that she’ll want the length of my dick thrusting tight against another man’s inside her doesn’t make me any less hesitant as she coaxes me back into position.
I focus on the warmth of her pussy around my fingers, holding my breath as I know the point of dick on dick is just moments away.
I flinch at the contact when she touches us together, but this time I don’t pull away. The head of him is hard against mine, surprisingly slippery as she grinds us together, tip against swollen tip.
I can’t believe I’m doing this, I can’t believe my dick is still hard, but it is.
It’s only when I hear Jack grunt that I realise he’s not nearly so hesitant as I am. But Jack never is.
Jack doesn’t have limits like I have. Jack goes all in for the pursuit of pleasure, and right now his pleasure is in Carrie’s hand as she rubs his dick against mine.
“Fuck,” he says. “Peen on fucking peen. This has never been on my fucking agenda.”
But he doesn’t stop and neither do I.
And it occurs to me, right at the back of my mind, that maybe he wants this. Maybe he’s not nearly so hung up on what all this means as I am.
The thought that he might even enjoy these blurry boundaries takes me aback, but makes my dick throb. It makes me shunt closer, giving Carrie all the leeway she needs to press us length to length and move us as one.
Oh fuck, it feels good. It feels so filthily good.
“You like it,” she whispers, “I can feel it.”
I don’t argue and neither does he. It would be pointless if we did, since she can feel it clear as day in her dirty little hands.
Her pussy is so wet, and so are our dicks. The sound of squelching fingers is loud, even under the covers, and the sound of breath is loud above them.
I’m going to come against Jack’s dick, spraying my load all over Carrie’s pretty little pussy underneath, and I’m pretty sure he’s going to come against mine and do the same.
“Kiss me,” she whispers. “Both of you, kiss me.”
Jack kisses her first. She moans for him, and the sound of wet mouths makes mine water. So tentatively I press my lips to her cheek, not caring that my face is right against his, not caring that when she turns her head and offers me her mouth, it’s with his tongue still lapping at hers.
I feel the last thread of resistance snap and fall away, because there’s no point holding onto something which is inevitably doomed to break anyway.
We’re sharing one girl. One hungry girl who’s desperate for two.
Two mouths.
Two big cocks.
Two men making her feel as dirty as I’m sure we’re making her feel right now.
Two men to love her no matter what.
I kiss Carrie with everything I’ve got, tongues twisting with tongues, not really giving a fuck anymore. Not really giving a fuck that Jack is about to come all over my dick as Carrie comes over two sets of fingers in her pussy.
“I knew you had it in you,” Jack groans. “I always knew you’d lose that stick in your ass one day.”
An interesting choice of words, but I feel strangely proud at the sentiment.
I’m still kissing Carrie as she comes for us, and so is Jack.
I’m still thrusting my dick against his as he shoots his load soon after, and I do too.
And then we’re a mess.
A sticky, wet, slippery fucking mess of bodies.
But I’m smiling.
No matter how fucking fucked up it feels to have had my best friend’s tongue in my mouth, I’m still fucking smiling.
Chapter Twenty-Six
Carrie
After all those years of feeling I had nothing to live for but a disgusting excuse for a brother who made me do things that no girl should ever do, I suddenly have a whole world in front of me.
I love wandering through the fields every day – especially today.
Especially since there was a knock at the front door this morning and I had to sign for a parcel with my name on it. I had to ask three times to make sure the courier was sure, but there it was in print – Carrie Wells – my name right over the address. I stared at it for ten whole minutes before I opened it, and when I finally tore into the box it took my breath.
A new pair of boots in just the right size. The delivery note said from Jack and Mike, you earned them with a string of kisses underneath. I still have it in my pocket. I don’t think I’ll ever take it out.
I love feeling the mud under those new boots as I set off across Jack’s beautiful farmland with a load of planks on my shoulder and a hammer stuffed down my waistband. They feel just perfect on my feet, as though they were made for me. Just like Jack and Mike are.
I’m nearly done with the fencing, but that’s okay now, because I’ve a chicken coop to make and a sheep pen to make after that, even if Jack hasn’t quite said yes yet.
He will.
I know he will.
I take a breath as I check out the clouds. They’re the fluffy white kind that turn into pictures the more you stare at them.
I see a rabbit, and a dragon. And a cock.
I laugh as I see a big white cock in the sky.
I laugh as I realise I’ve got everything I ever wanted, all right here. I laugh at how bizarre that feels, to have so much after having so little.
I laugh until happy tears stream down my face, and it’s a release. A beautiful release.
I’ve never cried happy tears before. Plenty of sad ones, but none like these.
We could be together forever – Jack, Michael, and me. Last night chased all those final fears away – the ones that cling on tight and won’t let go – because I know now that they really do love each other, and it’s more than friends, even if it’s not like that. Now I know this can work, properly work, because there’s nothing left to freak them out and send them running. There’s nothing more I’ll ask them to do, not unless they want it for themselves, because they’ve touched dicks and tongues and came all the same, and what else could possibly happen by accident? Nothing.
Anything else that happens will be because they want it, but it won’t be me pushing. It’ll be all them.
I can breathe this morning because I feel safe. Safe knowing Michael and Jack can handle this. All of this, and all of me. Even if I can be a brat sometimes, although I don’t have even half of the smart mouth I used to have.
They’d put me over their knees if I did, and that would be no bad thing either.
I drop my planks at the right spot and get to work on fixing up one of the worst panels, glad that this is one of my last ones and not the very first ones I started, because I’m so much better now than I was then.
In every way, not just with fences.
Maybe all things happen at the right time. Maybe this was the last fence I came across, because I needed to learn about the other
fences first. Maybe life has a plan like that.
Maybe I had to know what it was like to have no love at all, just so I can really appreciate having so much of it.
I’ve got so much of it I could burst.
More than enough for Jack and Mike and some chickens and sheep, and maybe some ponies and dogs too. I grin at the thought.
This is really it. They’ve seen the worst of me and now they’re seeing the best of me. I’ll put myself on the line for them just as they put themselves on the line for me.
I breathe a sigh of relief that the nerves have finally left my belly after all this time, smiling as I feel my phone buzz in my pocket.
I wonder which one of them it is.
Maybe Jack with a stupid joke, or Mike checking how I’m doing with the fence.
But it’s neither.
And the nerves are back in one terrible heartbeat.
Eli.
He wants his money and his text makes it perfectly clear.
His words make me shiver.
You owe me.
The attached photo makes my heart race. A picture of the centre of Lydney.
He’s here.
Oh my God, he’s really here.
But he doesn’t know Jack. He doesn’t know where I live now.
I try to force the nerves away but they won’t budge an inch.
All the filthy things I did for him come back to pool in my belly. They make me feel sick. I used to think it was okay before I knew what real love felt like, but now I know it isn’t. It never was.
What he did to me was cruel and disgusting. The way he made me use my body for him was a world away from how Jack and Mike make me feel.
I don’t care that he’s my brother anymore, or that he’s holding family news over my head. I don’t care that I may never get to see them again if I don’t do what he wants. If they wanted me, they’d have found me long ago. If they still believe his lies after all these years then I’m better off without them.
All the years of making excuses for him in the name of love seem so stupid now. All the lies I told to protect him. All the lies I told myself because I wanted to believe he loved me.