“Quick. Get in and I’ll shut the doors before I go hide.”
“No. You need to hide in hear with me.”
“I won’t fit.”
“You will. We just have to squeeze in.”
“There’s no time. Get in. I’ll hide over there.” Pointing toward the desk, I fear he may be found quickly but I do as I am told, anyways. The door handle begins to jiggle more and the person on the other side becomes adamant about getting in.
“Come out, come out whoever you are!” The voice sings. “I know you’re in there. There’s no hiding from me.” The anger is evident in Timothy’s tone as he begins to pound the door.
“Get in!” Beau pushes me in and just as he shuts the doors, I hear the crack of the classroom door as Timothy kicks it repeatedly before it finally slams open causing a loud crash.
“Beau. Is it only you in here? What a shame.”
“Why are you doing this, Timothy?” Beau’s voice trembles slightly with fear while my heart jumps into my throat. I silently let the tears fall hoping that Timothy doesn’t do anything rash and hurt Beau.
“Why wouldn’t I? You and your friends tormented me since we were kids and now I have decided to torment you.”
“You’re not tormenting us. You’re killing us off like rats.”
“Tomato, tomato.”
“Don’t do this.”
“Too late.” The crack of the gun as it goes off causes me to jump in my seat while the cry coming from Beau lets me know he’s been shot. I try so hard to keep quiet, but I can’t help the small squeak that escapes me. I’m terrified Timothy will find me. There’s nothing I could do if he decides to look in here.
“Marco!” Timothy calls out. After a moment he angrily shouts at me. “When someone says Marco, you’re supposed to say polo.” Banging his hand on the door of the cabinet before whistling as if nothing is amiss. Holding my breath, I hope he decides to move on. Just as I think I hear him leave, the doors fling open and I scream in fear.
“I knew someone was hiding. It’s such a shame, though. I actually liked you.”
“Then don’t do this. Please. You don’t need to do this.”
“It’s too late. I can’t let you live now that you know it’s me who’s got the gun.”
“Everyone already knows it’s you.” I shout in his face. My anger masks my fear, and for a moment, I almost believe I broke through to him. Timothy pauses for moment, seeming to contemplate what I just said, before his sinister smile returns.
“Well if that’s true, then I guess I’ll be killing everyone here.” The evil laugh that escapes Timothy chills my spine. Closing my eyes, I know there is nothing I can do to stop the inevitable. Instead, I grab the pendent around my neck that my mother used to wear and whisper to myself.
“I love you mom. I’m so sorry dad.” A tear slides down my cheek as Timothy touches my head with the barrel of the gun.
“I’m sorry.” He says before a bang goes off and the world goes black.
****
My world is dark except for the tiny light coming from far away. I run to it not caring where it takes me, only hoping to escape the darkness that surrounds me. But the more I run and the faster I move, the farther away the light becomes until there is nothing but black all around me.
“I love you my beautiful daughter. You must leave now and live. Live your life and fall in love. You don’t belong here.” The echo of my mother’s voice surrounds the space around me giving me no indication of where she is.
“Mom! Don’t leave me mom. I need you. Please don’t leave me.”
“I’ll never leave you, Kayla. Never. I’ll always be in your heart. I’m always watching you. You don’t need me. You’re strong. You’ll be fine. Go.” My moms voice fades at the end and I know she’s gone.
“No!” I scream, hoping that she’ll come back but the warmth that she emanated is gone and now there is only the cold touching my skin making me shiver with loneliness.
Curling into a ball, I wrap my arms around my legs and rock back and forth in the pitch black. It’s not long before another light appears far away. This time however, it seems to be growing in size and coming closer, illuminating the dark space around me. As I look around, the walls are plain white giving me no indication of where I am. As the light grows bigger and comes closer, warmth radiates from it and the bigger it becomes the hotter it gets until it’s nearly unbearable. I can’t breathe. The pain in my chest is too much, and I begin to cough. That’s when I hear it. The voices. Their faint and I don’t recognize them, but they’re there.
“She’s coding.” I try to understand the words, but nothing happens. It’s quiet once more.
Then it hits me. The excruciating shock to my chest and body wakes me from my dream and all I can do is scream, but nobody hears me. It happens again, and I want to cry out for them to stop. And then it happens. A jolt hits me like a mac truck and I wake with an unbearable burning in my chest.
The light is so bright and everything around me is hazy as I blink slowly trying to figure out where I am. A man in his forties leans over me saying something that I can’t quite understand or even hear, but his lips are moving. Turning my head to the side, I see another man who’s younger and unfamiliar, looking at a computer with wires and other miscellaneous things speaking to the other man, and yet I still can’t hear either of them.
Someone squeezes my hand on the other side of me, so I try with all my might to turn my head that way to see who’s there. At first, they are hazy from the light above. I see only a silhouette before the older man leans over me once again and blocks the ungodly light above me, and the face of the stranger becomes clear.
Austin.
Why is Austin here? This must be a dream if he’s here holding my hand comfortingly. Why is there so much blood on him? He looks terrible. What happened to make him look so disheveled?
Oh wait. He’s saying something to me and there are tears rolling down his cheeks. I wish I could read lips. I wish I could comfort him. I have no idea why he is so sad, and I want to just hold him until he smiles again.
The same man as before says something to Austin and I wish I could hear him. Austin nods his head before turning back to me and speaking again. Austin pulls my hand to his lips kissing the back of it. My heart bursts with love for this boy.
I try to say ‘I love you’ but no words come out. I’m not even sure if my lips moved. I try again but Austin looks away and before I even have a chance to understand what is happening, he leaves me. Why is he leaving me? I wasn’t done telling him my feelings.
I’m unsure what happens next as I begin to fall back asleep through no fault of my own. I tried my hardest to keep my eyes open, but they wouldn’t listen. Instead, darkness enshrouds me once again.
Chapter 22
We loved with a
Love that was
More than love
-Edgar Allen Poe-
“Argh.” Groaning in pain, my head pounds like a jackhammer is hitting my skull. I try to move my hand, but I’m attached to something and with each pull, it feels as if my skin is being ripped off. My mouth is dry and… oh god. I think something died in my mouth. It tastes gross which means it must smell disgusting. Licking my dry and chapped lips, I try to wet them, but I can’t seem to make my mouth listen to me.
Slowly, I begin to peel my eye’s open, but instantly shut them due to the bright lights shining down on me like a halogen.
“I think she’s waking up.” A distant voice cries. It sounds like Sarah, but I can’t be sure.
“Doctor!” Another voice yells and this time I know it’s my dad.
“It’s ok, honey. You can open your eyes now. We’re all here waiting for you. You’re safe.” Sarah soothes.
This time when I open my eyes, someone’s head is blocking the bright lights above me making it easier. At first, everything is hazy. There’s a halo around Sarah’s smiling face before my dad’s worried eyes peer over me, too.
“W
hat…What happened?” The pain in my throat bellies the scratchy words that barely come out as a whisper.
“How about we wait until the doctor checks on you and then we will tell you all about it. Ok?” My dad tries to convince me to wait as I look on in confusion. I can see the relief in his eyes that I’m awake and the exhaustion on his face from whatever happened to me. The last thing I can remember is seeing Austin and Evangeline at his locker. Then…nothing.
It’s weird.
When the doctor arrives, he checks my vitals quietly, before shining the light in my eye and suggesting to my parents that he run some tests. I pay little attention as I search the brightly lit hospital room. The window that looks out has a view that I can’t quite see. I seem to have the room all to myself and there are vases upon vases of daisies of all colors, with balloons and stuffed animals covering the whole far wall saying, ‘get well soon’ and ‘I love you.’ I just wish I knew what happened that put me in the hospital. It must have been pretty bad if I can’t even remember. Did I get into a car accident? Fall and hit my head? Have an anvil fall on me?
The doctor shoos my family out of the room, which includes Julia, Lacy, my brothers, my dad, and Sarah. I only noticed Sarah and my dad, as everyone else must have huddled in the corner. The doctor, his name is Dr. Bradley, was very kind and asked me numerous questions such as my name, how old I was, where I was, my address, the last thing I remember, and a few other things. It’s all routine questions I’m sure, but when I tell him what I remember, he jots a note down with a frown on his face and I instantly begin to feel as if I said something wrong.
“Everything seems to be fine. Only a slight memory loss, which is normal. I’m sure more will come back to you with time, so for now we won’t worry about it. I’m going to run some blood work and send you for an MRI to be sure everything looks good. Then if all is well, you can go home in a week. Maybe less.” Nodding my head, because it’s easier than talking, a nurse rushes in and begins to do as the doctor asks.
Several hours later I’m finally back in my room feeling more exhausted than ever. My family waits with smiles on their faces and I know that the doctor let them know everything was fine.
“Don’t you ever scare us like that again!” Lacy shrieks as she rushes to my bedside and pulls me into a bone-crushing hug. I let her even though I’m secretly holding in my cries of pain. Whatever happened to me scared everyone so bad that Lacy and Julia flew back here to be sure I was going to be ok.
“It’s probably best if we let the patient rest for now. You can come back later when she wakes and fill her in on everything then.” The nurse suggests. At first, I want to protest but then I realize she is right. I am exhausted and already the pull of sleep is tugging at my eyelids as I begin to slowly drift off. Everyone says their goodbyes and lets me know they will be back shortly. I nod my head just barely and fall into another deep sleep.
****
“Dad, I can walk.” I huff out as my dad lifts me out of the back seat of the SUV and proceeds to carry me up the steps of the house taking me straight to the living room and laying me down on the couch.
“No daughter of mine is going to be walking…”
“Levi, leave the poor girl alone. You don’t need to hover. She can walk. Are you planning on carrying her everywhere?”
“Yes. I am.” Dad mumbles and pouts. Dad lifts my legs before setting them on his lap grumbling about never letting me out of the house again.
“Dad,” he looks over, “I’m fine. I can walk. I’ll be fine. I promise.” The sadness that reflects in my dad’s eyes pulls at my heart. I hate that I scared my family and friends. I hate what Timothy did to my friends, my family, this town, and me.
I still can’t remember what happened that day, but I do know that a few students lost their lives. It wasn’t until another student tackled Timothy, whom nobody will tell me who that student was, that he finally was stopped. He was taken into custody and while locked up, he hung himself. In a way I feel bad for him because I know why he did it. He was scared and tired of being bullied that he just snapped. But that is no excuse for going on a murdering spree.
“The stud muffin has arrived. Don’t worry ladies, there’s plenty of me to go around.” Beau makes his way carefully over to me with a set of crutches under each arm and an exhausted smile on his face. From what I understand, Beau was shot in the chest and was quite lucky he got to the hospital on time. Beau tried to save me by taking a bullet for me instead of outing my hiding spot, and I will forever be grateful. Even though he took a bullet to the chest, he was able to be released quickly after his surgery. He was only in the hospital for a week and a half, unlike me who was there for just over two weeks. Now he walks around on crutches because Timothy broke his ankle for good measure.
“Come here stud muffin.” Throwing my arms open, Beau lowers himself carefully to my level, pulling me into a tight embrace causing tears to prick at the back of my eyes.
“Love you, gorgeous.” He whispers.
“Love you, too, stud muffin.” I whisper back. “Where’s my other bestie?”
“I’m comin, Kayla. Just had to drag something extra large inside with me.” Bobby yells from the hall. I can hear her huff and puff with a growl as she pulls whatever it is with her to the living room where we are all sitting.
“Where’s Lacy and Julia?” I question. They haven’t left my side since I woke up except when I had to get my tests done. It’s odd that they are not here now.
“They are shopping. Had to finish buying Christmas gifts for everyone.” Sarah replies. It’s crazy that I was in an induced coma for over two weeks. When I woke, Christmas was two days later so everyone decided to wait until I arrived home before celebrating. I just wish I had gifts to give everyone, but I never got the chance to finish shopping.
When Bobby turns the corner into the living room, she pulls a large frame of a man behind her. I would recognize this beautiful man anywhere. What I don’t understand is why he is here when we are no longer together and he’s with Evangeline.
“Jeeze. You are one large brute when you want to be. Go make up with your girl.” Bobby shoves Austin further into the room and my heart instantly beats at a rapid pace. I still love him more than my last breath, but it doesn’t change the fact we broke up. So, what is he doing here now?
“We’ll let you two talk.” My dad rises from the couch and everyone follows suit. What surprises me is when my father pulls Austin into a hug and whispers something into his ear. Austin nods and the confusion on my face becomes even more evident as Austin shares a small smile in return. I have no idea what is going on but now I am starting to become frustrated with all the secrets.
“Just listen to what my boy has to say.” Kissing the side of my head, Beau is the last to disperse, leaving just Austin and I in the room alone.
“May I?” Austin points to the spot at the end of the couch where my dad just vacated, and I cautiously nod my head. Lifting my feet up, Austin moves them over his legs as he takes his seat; both of us quiet not knowing what to say to each other.
Needing to break the deafening silence, I go first. “What are you doing here, Austin? What happened to Evangeline?”
Sighing, Austin turns to me to answer my questions. “I came to see you. I wasn’t sure if you wanted me to, but I had to be sure you were really ok. You scared me, Kayla. You almost died and that scared me more than anything. I could care less if I lost everything in this world but losing you would have gutted me.” Gasping at his admission, I want so badly to ask what he means and to hurry the hell up and get to the point.
“Evangeline and I were never anything.”
“But…”
“I know what you thought. I let you think Evangeline and I were together because I wanted you to hurt like me. It was childish and wrong, but I can’t take it back now.”
“Oh.” Looking down at my fiddling hands, I am unsure of how I should be feeling right now. Confusion, hurt, and relief are prominent as I
realize that our break up didn’t just affect me.
“When I saw you that day with blood everywhere, I thought I lost you. I saw red and couldn’t stop myself. I nearly killed Timothy before I was pulled off him. The paramedics came in and laid you out in front of me. There was so much blood, Kayla. So much. I didn’t think you were alive, but when the paramedic said you still had a pulse, the relief was instant. They worked on you the entire way to the ambulance while I sat next to you.”
Tears quickly fall from my eyes. Touching the spot on my head where Timothy shot me, I wince in pain. I must look a mess right now with half of my head shaved and wrapped in gauze. I can’t believe Austin was the one who stopped Timothy and saved me; saved us.
“I didn’t know. Nobody told me that you saved us.”
“Kayla, I didn’t save you. I wish I could have. If I was there, you would have never been shot.”
“You couldn’t have stopped him, Austin. He was crazy. Timothy had issues that you couldn’t fix, and he would have killed you.” Austin nods his head, but I know he doesn’t believe that.
“I rode with you in the ambulance. At first, they wouldn’t let me. Then when I told them what I did, how I took down Timothy, they gave in. I guess they wanted to let the man who saved you be there for whatever happened.”
“I…I thought I dreamt you.” Austin’s mouth lifts at one side before dawning a frown again.
“You coded in the ambulance. One of the men had to stick a tube down your throat and give you air while the other repeatedly shocked your heart. I thought I was going to lose you.”
“Thank you.” I whisper out between my silent sobs.
“I would move heaven and earth to protect and save you. I’ve loved you from the moment I laid eyes on you. I just didn’t know it then.”
“I love you, too.” Austin moves carefully over me, placing a hand at each side of my head as he hovers over me, staring deeply into my eyes.
Counting Goodbyes Page 23