by Scott Davis
I slumped my shoulders, looked at the ceiling, and filled my cheeks with air like a blowfish. So frustrating. Once again, she was right.
“Yeah, you’re counting your calories, and you just had 4,372,” she said. “Set your limits.”
I’m thankful I have Donna to help me set them.
Good Advice
Someone asked me about my toughest, lowest moments of weight loss and whether in those moments I had thought about Christ’s temptation in the desert.
After fasting forty days and nights, Satan approached Jesus with a proposition. The devil said, “Hey, if You’re really God’s Son, command these stones to become bread. Prove who You are. I mean, if You’re God then You created the rocks in the first place and it’s nothing for You to make bread out of them.”
Satan taunted Christ and sought to lure Him out of God’s will and to bow to his wishes. That’s his age-old technique. He always has something better for us, something easier, something full of half-truths. Every single time, it caters to our flesh.
Jesus, exhausted and starving, didn’t bite:
“It is written, ‘Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that comes from the mouth of God’” (Matthew 4:4).
Jesus quoted Scripture, and He did it not just to defeat Satan at that moment but also to demonstrate for all of us how to combat the enemy. The Word of God is our most formidable weapon in this immensely spiritual and mental war, and Scripture has the power not only of spiritual salvation but also of physical victory. This truth begs the question: How can we use Scripture in our most desperate and pivotal moments if we don’t know Scripture?
I like to find the most powerful Scriptures that relate to my struggle and commit them to memory. Throughout this book are several wonderful passages that can serve as useful answers to temptation and cravings. It is an exhibition in power beyond yourself to be able to stare at the sheet cake at the office party and say, “I will set nothing wicked before my eyes; I hate the work of those who fall away; It shall not cling to me” (Psalm 101:3).
The verse before that one is perfect for a placard in our dens: “I will behave wisely in a perfect way. Oh, when will You come to me? I will walk within my house with a perfect heart.”
Knowing the truth is one thing. Appropriating it is something else. I can write all of this truth because I know it to be effective truth, but I didn’t always invoke it. Yes, during my lowest moments I thought of Jesus’ response to temptation. I also thought of the Krispy Kreme doughnut I wanted to stuff whole into my mouth.
I’m a practical guy as well as a spiritual guy. While I believe quoting Scripture is the most powerful spiritual and practical step we can take, I also use other strategies to help survive what I call those “temptatious times.”
Eating habits either can be a defense against temptation or a cause of temptation. Good habits lead to a good defense. Bad habits generate temptations.
Donna and I went to Longhorn Steakhouse recently, and she ordered the chicken and asparagus. She ordered it right off the menu with no special cooking instructions like we asked for during our big push for weight loss. They brought out the chicken drenched in seasonings, the asparagus slathered in butter.
“I don’t like this,” she said. “You can’t taste the asparagus because of all the butter and salt.”
After that experience, Donna now orders the same meal but uses the special instructions because it tastes better. Her taste buds are renewed because her mind is renewed.
Before trying QWLCA, Donna and I would go to the movies and she’d get popcorn and dump in so much butter that the popcorn almost floated. Then she’d take the salt shaker and hold it high—I guess so she could see it—and it would rain salt on the popcorn. She’d shake it up and pour more salt. Shake it up and pour more salt. Then she’d wrap the salt shaker in a napkin and take it with her into the theater. She didn’t steal the theater’s shaker. She just borrowed it. She always put it back after the movie, but she wanted to salt the popcorn as she went through the bucket.
These days, she turns up her nose at salt. Why? Because salty food is only a habit. She ordered French Fries for the first time in a long time the other day. She took one bite and said, “Whoa, the salt on there is incredible.”
In my fat days, I made my own trouble. Isn’t it interesting how we’ll sit down to watch TV and then get up and go stare into the refrigerator and think, “Oh, I have nothing to eat in this house”? Then we open the cabinets only to find slim pickings before moving on to the pantry. Finally we settle on something the roaches wouldn’t eat and return to the TV. Thirty minutes later, what do we do? We go back to the same refrigerator and stare again as if the food fairy brought something new in the last half-hour.
The QWLCA plan teaches several good habits to combat such cyclical moments:
Set a routine. Establish meal and snack times and eat only during those times. Forbid yourself to eat anything else at any other time. And get ready to quote some of that Scripture. You’ll need it.
Set an eating place. This is a subtle but helpful strategy. You wouldn’t think eating in one place in your home could have much of an effect, but it does. Just ask your dog. Pick your spot at the table and eat only there, even for snacks. I need to work on this because I like to park in front of the TV. If you don’t give yourself permission to eat anywhere else in the house, you’ll train yourself to go to your spot and confine your “feeding” there. And don’t get offended when your dog sounds like Smedley and laughs under his breath.
Pursue other interests. One of the most effective strategies in weight control is to avoid boredom by engaging in favorite activities. If those activities eventually include physical activity that burns calories, all the better. I avoided eating when I was hungry by reading my QWLCA plan booklet or working on the computer or reading the Bible or praying. Sometimes Donna and I went for walks, and now we like to bicycle. Hunger pangs go away when your mind is focused on something else.
Use smaller plates. Much of eating is psychological. I’ve seen normal people load up their plates only to get halfway finished and say, “My eyes were bigger than my stomach.” I’ve never had that problem. I learned we can trick our brains into thinking average portions are larger than they really are by using smaller plates, even if you have to buy some. If you can’t afford new plates, spread out average portions on your plate (rather than piling them) to achieve the same effect. Your mind sees less plate and believes you’re eating more than you are. This technique convinces the brain to be satisfied with less.
Disobey your parents. If your parents were like mine, they taught you to clean your plate. This discipline likely stemmed from the Great Depression and also from the days of more rural living in our country. It became almost sacrilege to throw out perfectly good food. If you want to lose weight, don’t clean your plate. Leave a little out of principle.
Reward yourself. Divide your weight loss goal into achievable stages and reward yourself when you reach a marker. If you’re trying to lose 100 pounds, then treat yourself to something you really like for every ten pounds you lose. You don’t get a milkshake, but maybe you get another cool pair of shoes.
Don’t leave leftovers. Prepare and cook only what you plan to eat. Leftovers are a chilled temptation when you stand and stare with the fridge door open.
Don’t stand and stare with the fridge door open. There is no such thing as a food fairy. If you find yourself doing this, it’s because you’re bored and need something to do. Go back to Good Habit number three and pursue other interests.
Follow these guidelines and, at the end of another day of success, you can head off to bed content that you honored God by living up to yet another valuable Scripture—just like the psalmist who came through trials and temptations with unwavering faith.
“You have tested my heart; You have visited me in the night; you have tried me and have found nothing; I have purposed that my mouth shall not transgress” (Psalm 17:3).
&nbs
p; MY MONUMENTAL LIFESTYLE CHANGE wasn’t the first time I’d shed significant weight. Before Donna and I married in 1998, I got down to 195 pounds. I weighed well over 200 pounds for years but felt my biological clock ticking, which at my size was Big Ben. I knew I had to lose weight to find a woman.
I found her through her daughter, Brandy, who attended the student ministry I helped lead. Brandy knew I was a performer because her family had watched me in most of Mark Lowry’s videos. She introduced me to her mother, and we took it from there, much to Brandy’s chagrin. It meant her master plan backfired.
She had thought, “I’ll introduce mama to this guy. He’ll introduce her to Mark Lowry, and she’ll marry Mark Lowry.”
We know this to be true because years after our wedding Donna found a letter written by a teenaged Brandy to Mark Lowry. She wrote Mark all about her mother and how she’d make a great wife. Donna found it because Brandy never mailed it, and we discovered her motivation for introducing Donna to me.
Talk about tugging on the heartstrings of the second fiddle.
I was 36 when I got married. I thought I knew all about women. I now realize I knew nothing about women. I mean, I didn’t know toilet paper had a certain way to roll until I got married. Just this past year, she convinced me it went on that little stick.
As a bachelor, I’d leave clothes everywhere. I like to get comfortable when I come home. When I hit the door in my single days, I’d leave a trail of clothes from my welcome mat to my recliner because I’d get comfortable on the spot. After we married, Donna grew flustered with my act.
“Why don’t you pick up those socks?” she said.
“Honey, if you give ‘em long enough, they’ll go to the laundry room on their own.” I knew I was in trouble when she didn’t laugh.
I learned more about women when I took my dirty dishes to the dishwasher. I want a dishwasher that will live up to its name and actually clean a dish. Many fall short of their purpose. One night, Donna tried to train me on proper dishwasher use.
“You’ve got to prepare the dishes for the dishwasher,” she said.
“What? Prepare them? It’s a dishwasher.”
She filled the sink with water, poured in dishwashing liquid, and grabbed the dishrag and sponge and Brillo pad and buffer and sander and drill and readied every dish for the dishwasher.
“That’s like painting the house before hiring a painter,” I said. “You just washed it before you wash it!”
I don’t want a dishwasher like that. I want a dishwasher so strong you can insert a plate with a chicken leg stuck to it and when it comes out the chicken leg is gone. I want a dishwasher that will do what it’s designed to do.
This is why I decided to try QWLCA. I also wanted an eating program that does what it’s supposed to do.
An observation by Mark Lowry on my wedding day reminded me for years afterward that I needed more than just a typical diet. Mark served as best man at my wedding, though he tried to bail.
“I don’t know if I should be your Best Man,” he said. “Everyone I’ve ever been Best Man for got divorced.”
Donna and I are still going strong, in large part because Mark obeyed Donna at our wedding. Donna told him he couldn’t open his mouth until the reception, and he didn’t cut up at all. But he said something that day, when I was 195 pounds, I’ll never forget.
“I know you, Scott,” he said, cutting his eyes at my slim waistline. “You’re going to say ‘I do’ and head to the buffet.”
Mark is a great funny man and singer but apparently he’s also a prophet. I guess he knew our honeymoon was a cruise. Like Mark says, all you can do on a cruise without sinning is eat. Of course, the way I went about it was sin.
At first, I followed the disciplined regimen I planned. I promised myself, “I’m going to eat only sugar-free desserts on the ship.” I planned ahead to order all the healthy options. Gyms on cruise ships are as big as the gym I attended back home. We booked a seven-day cruise, and I just knew I could maintain my discipline for a week, even a week outside my normal routine.
I ate my diet stuff for the first couple of days. I went to the gym and lifted weights, ran on the treadmill, and sat in the sauna. On the third day, I used only the sauna. On the fourth day, I watched other people work out. On the fifth day, I passed the gym on the way to the pizza buffet.
I wound up eating the midnight buffet. Just as Mark predicted, I started gaining weight on the cruise and did not stop for any extended period until I started the QWLCA plan.
The final and most important ingredient to the recipe of good health is the one most overlooked even by Christians. We need to take it to God. The ultimate diet partner, the ultimate helpmate, the ultimate encourager is the Lord. This is why the final Golden Nugget to staying fat is Place Your Order Anywhere But at the Lord’s Table. Wide is the road that leads to approaching weight loss in your own strength. Very wide.
The only way to guarantee success on this plan or any other is to take everything to the Lord. A clinic full of experts helps. An encouraging loved one or friend is crucial. But it is possible to lose weight without those folks.
In my opinion, it’s impossible to change without the Lord’s help.
Focus
The Apostle Paul in his second letter to the church in Thessalonica encouraged believers to “pray without ceasing” (5:17). This means our days are to be filled with a constant conversation with our Creator, most of it under our breaths as we request wisdom and discernment, ask forgiveness, pray for others, and seek strength and boldness.
We must depend on Christ and His strength to maintain good habits and good health. He won’t solve our problems for us, however. He doesn’t hand life to us on a silver platter, especially when we’re licking our chops to see what’s on the platter. He promises never to leave nor forsake His children (Hebrews 13:5b) even when we continue in destructive habits. He stands patient, opening doors of escape and wooing and inviting, the loving Father awaiting the wayward child.
God won’t do everything for us, but He will go through life with us and help us beyond measure. It’s comforting to know Jesus is with His children through the tough times and good times. Mark told me something years ago I consider profound: “God not only loves us but He likes us.”
I suspect the statement resonated with me because of my past. I grew up in an independent Baptist church, and we served God almost out of fear. I feared God would strike me dead in high school when I looked at a pretty girl the second time.
God wants the best for our lives. It’s like the Christian teenager who wanted to go the party on Friday night. Everyone knew about it, and everyone planned to go. She came from a conservative, godly family and she wanted to go hang out with friends. Ultimately, she decided to stay home. Her friends asked her why.
“What, are you afraid you’ll get caught and your dad will hurt you?”
“No,” she said. “I’m afraid I’ll hurt him.”
We should live for God not out of fear He will hurt us but out of fear we will grieve Him. Our parents want to be proud of us. They want us to succeed. I’m motivated by my desire to please my heavenly Father and to refuse to do anything that will displease Him. That relieves the burden of the performance-based theology of my youth. Everything was how you looked, who your friends were, what you did, what you said, and where you went.
It’s not about doing. It’s about being. It’s about who you are in Christ. It’s not about dwelling on some back-and-forth battle between flesh and spirit. It’s about abiding in Jesus and learning to enjoy Him. My problem during the incessant war between Skinny Scotty and Supersize Scotty was misguided focus. I had my eyes on my gut rather than my God.
A focus on the Lord brings strength and resolve. Only then can we walk past any buffet line, hear the dumpling demon whisper, and answer in full confidence of the Lord, “Sure, I’d love to dive in. But that’s not me anymore. I’m not my own. Jesus owns me. Jesus is my life.”
When Jesus walked the
earth, most of His family thought He was nuts. They couldn’t figure out the man who had grown up with them but now performed inexplicable miracles for perfect strangers and spoke in mysterious parables weighted with eternal truths. They couldn’t wrap their minds around the fact that the kid who fetched water with them now walked on it. They knew Him only as a brother, not God’s Son.
Then something happened.
After Christ’s crucifixion, He arose from the dead and opened the way for anyone who would believe in Him to have eternal life. Because He lives, we can too.
That’s exactly what happened to at least some of His family. First Corinthians 15:7 reveals that Jesus’ half-brother, James, saw Jesus after the resurrection. James knew what had happened on the Cross. He knew Roman soldiers rolled a heavy stone into the doorway of Christ’s tomb. He knew they sealed the stone over the entrance. He knew the soldiers stood guard over the tomb.
And James knew, sometime shortly after the Resurrection, Jesus stood before him with nail-scarred hands and feet. The Bible does not give details, but James’ reaction must have been similar to that of Doubting Thomas. When he saw the resurrected Jesus for the first time, Thomas uttered one of the most powerful pronouncements ever recorded: “My Lord and my God.”
No need to reach and touch the scars. Just….
“My Lord and my God.”
In my heart, I believe James did the same. I believe this because James went on to become the pillar of the Christian church in Jerusalem, abandoning his forefathers’ Judaistic faith that had convinced him Jesus was a lunatic. Before Jesus’ crucifixion, James looked at his half-brother and scoffed because he knew better.
After seeing Jesus alive again, James really knew better.
I love how James begins the only book of the Bible credited to his authorship. He identifies himself in the first sentence: “James, a bondservant of God and of the Lord Jesus Christ.”