Mens (english version)

by Quelli di ZEd

  33.

  And so I had returned as before. Be', not exactly; but when I woke up my morning, the cispa at times it punctured me the eyes. I cut me shaving me and at times playing with the boys I did me a livid blue. However I enjoyed me the pranzettis of Daylight and the caress of the sun on the skin, the perfumes of the gardens and that sense of human, terrible vulnerability that gives importance to every day of our life. There is no need to go on Mars to be special; him he is in the daily life, if it is not completely alone. And I was not him/it. I had a great family: apart Daylight and the boys, there were those of the laboratory; I continued to go us and the project that my name brought it continued as not never. My brain was unique however, even if you/he/she had shown more than once to contain an idiotic mind.

  And there were Patricia and his/her children; after the plant of my brain inside Dan, after I had become Dan, at least to a superficial look, I had not seen none of them. Comprehensible. I wanted lasciar to spend some time, then I would have found the way of do me alive also with Patricia and the boys, because we were united from something of extraordinary, something that had given me with pain. My unstoppable tutelar spirit had to be also satisfied toward of them however, I knew him/it. But not immediately. Before I had to learn to use my new body. I owed to return human to all the effects, not the awkward manikin that hardly succeeded in walking. Because yes, of all the difficult things that I had had to learn again, to the usual one the deambulazione was that thornier: every day I appeared on the sidewalk before house and I did me some kilometer tightening the teeth, pesticciando the feet on the pavement, stantuffando as an ancient locomotive, and more than an unloader cursing of I bring.

  The muscles worked and my senses were excellent, yet the simple one to put together two footsteps appeared me arduous enterprise and inarrivabile. Daylight had accompanied me more times, taking me to braccetto and trying to distract me with its gossips, but stumbles, I had stamped on my same feet and after his, risking to make to fall both.

  My daughter had abdicated snickering in irritating way.

  «You will arrive there dad. Don't be in a hurry.» you/he/she had said.

  I/you/they have always been a patient person, I strove me to remember him/it.

  One day as another I was gone out of the laboratory pawing as a held back colt, when I remembered mine small old evening tradition: it was time of rinverdirla.

  This way, caracollai toward the park as a taught bear, trying not to hinder the people that I met.

  «Poor guy.» it said burdens passer-by shifting me.

  Also the oldies overcame me with the chin to the insù.

  It was a punishment and I drenched of sweat the shirt, but I succeeded in reaching the park however and to throw myself on the bench of my private angoletto. The fontanella gushed Argentinian and there was the birdies you sue to make himself/herself/themselves the bath in the small basin completing the softness of the scene.

  I breathed to full bellows the pregnant air of the perfume of cut grass and I slightly shivered for some refolos of wind that it disarranged me the hair. Cools, but of it godetti every instant.

  I was alone, as you/he/she was often happened late afternoon to that time of the when I had gone down there as metallic marcantonio.

  I left half open the eyes and I left that my human perceptions solicited me; I was master of it, by now, even if my brain had had to learn to sensory riutilizzare that didn't know from quite a lot. The only difficulty I had him with the touch, that I lived in exaggerated way: to touch something was still a strong and vehement experience, perhaps because that was the sense that an iron body sacrifices more. Done it is that the simple presence of the suits on my skin communicated me small electric shake and a permanent itch ubiquitario it made the matter how much less annoying.

  The first time that I dressed me I did him/it in front of my physicians, and it was embarrassing in absolute way; I had already had to show indifference in front of my sex: that stuff that hung there before it was of Dan, not my and the only idea to touch her/it for mingere it created me a strong uneasiness. When however I wore the underpantses. and The didn'ts know whether to I give to put her without touching me. The tried an unthinkable feeling to the stomach and The dirtieds anywhere of seminal liquid.

  The physicians also blushed. They had a beautiful say that it was what normal, I cannot wait to run away away. Since then the things were improved of very, naturally.

  The sense of smell and the taste were a pleasant surprise of which I misused, and, in fact, I fattened up of eight kilos and I continued to stramangiare until I had not brutally put to diet.

  With the time I found an equilibrium without helps.

  The sight was a small disappointment, instead: the extension missed me to all the frequencies of the ghost, it seemed me to observe the world to clear-dark, without chromatic tones. The man has his/her limits, he is known, everything is to accept them.

  My thoughts were interrupted by a composite scalpiccìo of hasty footsteps, that first they reached me and then they overcame me stopping himself/herself/itself to the opposite bench.

  «Hi, Angel» it said a voice that well I knew.

  I opened the eyes: in front of me, over the jet, there were three ladies.

  The first one was Robin, obviously; you/he/she had spoken her, and not as soon as I saw her/it I became as a pepper red. I was a complete man, now, and my hormones took to tyrannize me: it was beautiful, Robin, above all without that astronaut diving-suit. I watched out for not to move not to produce me strange strofinii to the low abdomen.

  «Hi» I said me with uncertain voice.

  Had I always been so prevented with the women?

  «Good morning, Angel» the mayor joined in conversation; her, sat close to Robin, you/he/she was in form and you/he/she seemed radiant. «We have a scaletta, I hope that you are not sorry. We won't give you a lot of time to speak. You know, we are three busy women.»

  I didn't understand what it intended; then I looked at his/her right and I studied the neighbor, more or less of the age of Daylight, with a white baton and dark goggles. Threadbare, the girl of the Whip.

  «It is my turn» it said the young one fixing me without seeing me. «You/they have told me thing you have combined, iron man. Not badly.»

  It had the usual decided tone. It slightly smiled.

  «I almost all come here the evenings» it added. «It is a calm place. You have done me him to know you. They tell me that you have some problem.»

  I don't know who had told her what; but it had to deal him with walking, lately I had abused physicians and family with my complaints.

  «You see to stop her/it and put us some heart» it said Threadbare, hard, but keeping on smiling. «There is still need of you, down here. I watch you.»

  The expression in his/her mouth didn't not at all seem paradoxical: it watched indeed me, to his/her way. Threadbare it got up and it went with sure footstep as you/he/she had come.

  «It is my turn» it said the mayor. You stuck out in my direction uniting the hands. «I won't succeed in being concise as Threadbare. Everything, thanks. You have done a good job; too much, someone would say also.»

  I understood that that it intended: my transmissions had brought New Delon to the political smash. Fei knew the mayor of that city, it was not difficult to discover him/it. From there to the journalistic extrapolations the footstep was brief: the whole junta town was had to discharge, the mayor if n'era escaped who knows where, New Delon had been left in balìa of itself same. This way that happened that had been craved by Fei, but contrarily: New Delon was attached to New Sealon.

  But I am putting too much her on the melodramatic one: in reality it is more correct to say that the two cities they finally melted him with the approval of the World Assembly of the Mayors.

  The administrations and the police became only, but the daily life of the middle citizen had of it well few consequences. You reduced the free political rissosità,
this yes. They were almost all overall happy.

  The mayor looked for the correct words.

  «But above all, Angel, Threadbare you/he/she has said a correct thing. There is need of you. Not only for your family or for the woman that is nearby me.» The becames red as to next tomato to the marcescenza. «No, also the City needs you. You have shown that certain abilities can have put to service of the whole community.»

  Did it say the mayor seriously? It seemed that he/she didn't succeed in realizing that I was in meat and bones, now; I would not have been able to make alcunché of exceptional, as simple human being anymore. The woman saw my expression and smiled.

  «I have talked to your physicians. Your brain is still cabled, Angel. If you want, you can return in your old steel bodies, or in others. Think of us. In this old world we have a lot of problems. You could be still profit, he/she is never known.»

  I opened wide the mouth as a fish in slow asphyxia.

  «Be'» I observed, cautious. «It is not just as to change himself/herself/themselves the suit.»

  «I know him/it» it admitted her. «But to the laboratory there is smart people. They say that your brain can do well other.»

  «I believe her on the word» I affirmed.

  I looked at Robin now, and the mayor interested me the correct one. Robin reciprocated my look with a certain modesty.

  The mayor you are had to acknowledge my distraction because it got up standing, it overcame the fountain and the hand put me on the shoulder.

  «Of it riparleremo. Enjoy your human condition.»

  Says this, it hastily got further making me a sign with the hand.

  «It is my turn» he/she ascertained Robin.

  «Already» I said me.

  I thought only about checking me, that he/she spoke her.

  «Damn you» Robin began, serious. «I/you/they have become the laughingstock of the colleagues from when you/he/she has gone circulating that your transmission.»

  «I regret it, I didn't think.»

  «I speak me. I/you/they have been furious for a beautiful po' with you, but then you/he/she is passed. I have had a lot of job after our mission on Mars. New responsibilities. It seems that the tall spheres put back in me a foolish trust. Worth of the mission on Mars. Absurd, up there you have done all you. However the mine goes to the great one. I wanted that I knew him/it. We have closed the collapsed part, too much dangerous, and open other more superficial galleries.»

  It didn't care a cionfolo of it, to the moment; I appreciated, however, finds again her/it intimacy of that pescettinis to the ultraviolet one. My recordings had not underlined them, since who had viewed her it was a normal human being. Now they returned to be confined in their world, to the shelter from that big snoops of the man.

  Smiles: stuff from crazy person, had extended my morbid tutelar spirit until on Mars.

  «Until now I have left you alone» it said Robin. «You had to take back you. They have lately happened too of it. And I still grant you some time. Few, however. I have intention to know the gentleman that is me before, it would be able not to be sorry me.»

  Dan had been a beautiful man, in life, certainly more attractive than me. I became for the third time ruddy.

  «Ehm, better, yes» I said. «In effects. The have burdens exaggerated physical reactions, to the moment.»

  «I have felt him say. It plays interesting» it made Robin smiling.

  I dissuaded the look. The birdies attractively sprinkled droplets of water in my direction to dry after the bagnetto.

  I turned again me toward of her.

  «So you knew him/it» I said me changing matter. «Of my brother.»

  Robin returned serious.

  «Yes, I am sorry Angel. You/they have communicated us the news on the ship. I have not done in time to tell you him, you were always in the world of the dreams. And I don't know if I would have done him, however.»

  «It is for this» I said. «For this I/you/they are seemed you. attainable. A real possibility.»

  «The perspective has softened me, yes: you could become again man, Angel remaining.»

  «I am also Dan.»

  «Perhaps. But you have the voice of Angel. You six Angel. We have spoken quite a lot, more than that that memoirs. I know you. I am not a ragazzina anymore, that I am liked that you have inside the skull, and it is especially what interests me. If then it is in an attractive body, better.»

  Robin had some beautiful smooth hair to caschetto, vanished blonds, with a saucy long hair. Behind the helmet I had not succeeded to appreciate her/it and on the ship I was too twisted for realizing me of it. I very slowly took action of his/her beauties. How strange.

  «I have to go. You know, the job» it said Robin lifting himself/herself/itself standing. «You remain still here for some, please. Don't approach you. Don't be the solo to have exaggerated reactions.»

  This I didn't understand her/it, but it didn't perhaps care.

  I followed with the look Robin that went. He/she remained me in the eyes his/her smile. I was alone again.

  I inhaled with strength and I fought me the hands on the knees.

  «Of accord» I told me tall voice, letting a pair of passer-bys turning. «I will have to learn to walk for the fourth time, it seems.»

  I got up me standing. Threadbare it was right: I had to give me a movement and to plant her/it with the whinings. All it took is putting us some heart. Also the mayor was right: I could lend a hand, I was not a very smart person, but I had a flexible and adaptable brain and I was learning to use better always it.

  Also Robin was right: you/he/she had left me alone, but you/he/she would not have a lot still pazientato for. And for then I had to be ready.

  After all to walk was not difficult. It first of all served the courage. Then, some technique: I made to depart fifteen trials, every tense to analyze the movement of all the people that I saw around me to a certain distance. My eyes squirted here and there, while I was sucking feelings from all the parts of my body; I looked for my baricentro and I transmitted stimuli voters to the whole muscular apparatus. I studied the reactions of it and I made to depart the elaborations extrapolating in abstracted the perceptions of my body in movement. The park was not around me anymore: I saw to everything field the image of myself to stir in a tactile and visual simulation; to every minuscule unbalance I modified the stimuli and my body he straightened. Rhesuses as the loosest mechanism, until I didn't feel that I had not walked so well never in all of my life, that any man in every time had ever done him. Racimolai all the data, integrated them among them and I condensed them. I memorized the necessary one and I made to disappear the simulation. The real world reappeared me before.

  I breathed again: few instants had passed by the departure of the trials. I realized me that I knew how to be more precise than so: I had calculated that time up to the decimillesimo of according to.

  Very well it was the moment to return home.

  Smiles: I would have made a surprise to Daylight and the boys, a kind of small gift for the one that has always been spellbound from the space as me. Who knows as you/they would be felt about being the only ones to the world to know that on Mars there was some true life?

  Be', I would have discovered him of to a few minutes there.

  I taken to walk to great fluid footsteps, without effort, whistling to the time of the passerottis while I was serenely crossing the paths of the park.

  The author

  Luca Poggi, engineer, lives to Quarrata on the hills near Pistoia, where he/she works and alive with his/her family: wife, three children and three cats. From a few years he/she writes stories and novels, without forgetting his/her first love: the science fiction.

  With 0111 Editions Luca Poggi has published:

 

  "The last rain" (adventure, 2012)

  "Escape from the Sparrow hawk" (science fiction, 2011)

  "Of star in star" (harvest of fantastic stories, 201
1)