He didn’t seem to mind. He walked up to me, really close and prised the keys out of my hand. Smiling right in my face, so I could see the flecks of darker blue in his azure eyes, he whispered, “Thanks.”
I was putty in that guy’s hands. I swear...
*
Once we were parked up, we headed down to the main shopping centre. “That place looks cute.” Jodie commented, nodding to a small independent coffee shop, “And you know – Costa and Café Nero are okay – but I prefer to give my custom to the little people.”
I chuckled, “I know what you mean – being one of said little people.”
He grinned at me and took my hand in his. Trying to ignore the effect his touch had on me, I allowed him to pull me along to the shop.
“Hey guys.” The friendly woman from behind the counter beamed at us, “What can I get you?”
Jodie beamed back at her, “Can we have a pot of coffee to share – and do you do cooked breakfasts?”
She nodded, “Sure – what do you like? Full English or something a little lighter?” She eyed us both as if she thought we couldn’t possibly manage to eat a full plate of food – I guess we were both kind of small and skinny.
I grinned at Jodie and nodded. He turned and ordered us both a full English with toast and marmalade to finish.
Chuckling, the woman took the order and then disappeared into the back, shouting out to someone else the order.
Jodie turned to me, “I think a grey suit would look good on you.”
I raised an eyebrow, “Grey?” I asked, with more than a hint of disgust in my voice, “Jodie – the only thing I own that is grey is...” I racked my brains, “Actually I don’t own anything grey – and do you know why? Because it’s grey. I don’t like grey.” Grey was so... grey.
He shook his head and chuckled. A deliciously low sound that made the hairs on the back of my neck stand up. He looked up at me, “Believe me – you’re going to change your mind on that – grey is the new...”
I raised an eyebrow again, “Do tell.” I said sarcastically.
He threw his head back and really laughed, “I promise you, River – you’re going to buy a grey suit!”
I laughed with him and internally vowed that even if he picked out the most amazing grey suit the world had ever seen, I was going to insist on the blue one, or the black one – or even the fucking red one... Ahh, who was I kidding – he was right – I’d go with the one he liked... Every fucking time...
The waitress came over at that point with two huge plates of food. She smiled shyly at us as she put the plates down, “Careful.” She said, “They’re hot.”
I nodded, “Thanks – this looks incredible.” I shot her a friendly smile.
Jodie thanked her too and she left, bright red in the face. He looked at me, “You really have to stop dazzling people – especially girls – it’s so not fair when they don’t stand a chance.”
I blinked, “Uh?” I asked. “I was only being nice.”
He smiled and nodded, “I know that.” He said, “But you ooze sex appeal like something not right.”
My jaw dropped, “Seriously, dude – are you trying to make me feel self-conscious?” I asked, “Because believe me – I have enough self-loathing issues going on without you adding to them.” Too much information...
He looked at me blankly, “Self-loathing?” he asked, “what’s not to love about you?”
My heart started to beat a little faster in my chest. I could feel my face heating up. I shrugged, “Never mind – let’s eat.” I said. Seriously. He was going to be the death of me...
Chapter 16 – Suits, Ties and Bow ties...
Jodie
Self-loathing? What the hell?
“What’s not to love about you?” I asked before I could really process what I was saying. Shit. I really had to watch what I was saying around him. It was too damned easy to forget all about everyone else when I was with him. No wonder Jake adored him – he really was adorable.
He went all pink in the face, which was even more reason to love him, and shook his head, “Never mind.” He mumbled, “Let’s eat.”
He stabbed a mushroom with perhaps more aggression than was absolutely necessary and dipped it into his egg.
“I love dippy eggs.” I said as I watched him.
“This isn’t a dippy egg.” He said, “It’s a fried egg.”
I nodded, “I know that – I was just saying I loved dippy eggs – with toast soldiers – don’t you?”
He shrugged, “Never really thought about it.”
“Marcia makes the best toast soldiers and dippy eggs.” I said with a bit of sigh, “You should come back with us sometime and meet her...”
River smiled, “That sounds nice.” He said, “But she’d probably freak and think we were having a three-way or something.”
I laughed, “Nah – she’s pretty cool but I don’t think that would ever cross her mind.”
He shrugged, “Must be nice to have such open-minded folks. All my mum and dad could ever envisage was me having sex with loads of guys and being into all sorts of kinky shit – they heard the word gay and immediately disowned me.”
I shook my head, “I’m really sorry they treated you like that – my parents, well, you know, Dad and Marcia, always knew – they weren’t in the least bit surprised when I came out.”
River smiled, “That’s good.” He said, “I’m damned sure mine must have known underneath all of their bluster that they were shocked and disgusted – they had to have been waiting for me to pluck up the courage to tell them – only to throw it all back in my face.”
What sort of people were they? They sounded absolutely awful... “Well, that was delicious,” I said as I placed my knife and fork back down onto my plate. “Absolutely awesome.”
River wasn’t far behind me, “It really was.” He agreed, dropping his knife and fork down with a bit of a clatter. “And now for the toast.”
I watched him as he attacked his toast and marmalade with gusto. He was so damned beautiful. His parents, particularly his father who had no chance now to build bridges, had really missed out on an amazing son. Fools...
After we finished our breakfast and coffee, we headed across to the shopping mall. I led River, who clearly didn’t have any idea where any shops for formal wear were, to one of my favourite shops. I understood why River didn’t know these sorts of shops – he was all about ripped jeans, tight tops and short shorts. This particular establishment didn’t own a pair of ripped jeans...
I walked in with River trailing behind me. The shop assistant looked up and smiled, “Hello, sir – how can I help you?”
I smiled back, “My good friend here doesn’t have a suit to wear – and we have a funeral to attend.”
The man went into sales mode almost instantly. He brought out five suits. River discarded two almost immediately with, “I’m twenty-one dude, not fifty-one.”
He settled on a dark grey (yay!) and a navy blue to try on and disappeared into the changing rooms.
While he was in there I chose a bow tie and a dark purple silk tie for him to try on with them. I passed them through the curtain and heard his sigh as he took them from me. “Great, ties...” he muttered. He really wasn’t enjoying this all that much. I decided that a hot chocolate and blueberry muffin were gonna have to be on the cards for lunch...
After another two minutes went by he emerged from his cubicle. I turned to look at him and nearly fainted. Oh, my God... He looked stunning.
“Well?” he asked, looking at me uncertainly, “Does it fit? Do I look okay?”
I grinned at him, “You look fantastic.” I said, “The tie is en pointe.”
He nodded, “I’ll try the other one on with the bow tie.”
I nodded, “Sure,” I agreed, “But I really like that one – it’s perfect.”
He gave me a little half-smile and disappeared back behind the curtain. Another couple of minutes passed and he was back out. He still looke
d utterly delicious in the navy suit and bow tie – but the grey one with the tie was the way to go. “I hate it.” He said with feeling. “The suit and the bow tie are all wrong together – but I tried it with the tie first and I still didn’t like it – you were spot on about the grey one...” He disappeared again before I even had chance to respond.
I slumped against the wall. He was kind of an exhausting shopping pal...
A few more minutes passed and I was beginning to wonder what the hell he was doing in there.
“Jodie?” I heard River’s frantic whisper from the other side of the curtain.
“What?” I whispered back.
“I can’t get this fucking bow tie off – what the hell were you thinking?”
I chuckled, “Okay – maybe you should go with purchasing the tie.”
“Yeah, thanks for that moment of pure wisdom,” he hissed through the curtain, “I will – but would you just help me with the bow tie – it’s seriously stuck – I can’t walk around with a fucking bow tie on all day... and I’m working tonight!”
He was seriously freaking out. I whipped the curtain open and darted inside. He had his back to me, still frantically working the fastening on the bow tie. The sight in the mirror that met my eyes was one I will never forget – ever.
He was stood there, in his socks and the bow tie. I blinked and tried my best to avert my eyes from his groin area – which wasn’t easy since it was fucking beautiful... I looked up and my eyes met with his in the mirror, “Help me, man.” He said desperately.
He turned around to face me and I’m not gonna lie – it took all of my inner control not to drop to my knees and suck that dick for all I was worth.
He was semi-hard, which was such a turn on, “Dude,” I whispered as I set to work on the bow tie, “Where the fuck are you boxer shorts?”
He grinned, “I didn’t have any – maybe we should buy some today.”
I nodded, feeling suddenly a little breathless, “Maybe we should.” I agreed.
The fastening on the bow tie finally freed itself and then he was just in his socks – with a massive boner going on. We both looked down at it – it wasn’t easy to hide after all – River was hung.
I looked back up at him and licked my lips nervously. He was looking back at me, a slightly embarrassed look on his face. Had I really done that to him? “Bow tie’s free.” I said for something to say.
He nodded, “Thanks.” He stepped forward and wrapped me up in a quick hug, “What would I do without you?” he asked with a laugh.
I laughed too and pulled away from him quickly. “I’ll, uh, I’ll be outside – the first suit looked great by the way.” Not as good as you look right now, though...
I shot back out of the changing rooms and stood outside wondering what the hell just happened. Nothing actually – of course he’d get a boner standing in a changing room naked with a guy breathing down his neck. It was just my own imagination that was making me feel like it was all about me, making me think things were happening between us that weren’t there...
River appeared after a couple of minutes. “I think I will take this suit – it’s the best one I’ve seen.”
I nodded, suppressing a smile, “The grey one?” I asked.
He just smiled that gorgeous smile, “Uh, yeah.” He agreed, “The grey one.”
Chapter 17 – Back home...
River
I know it was a sombre occasion – going to my father’s funeral when I hadn’t seen him in years, but my mind wasn’t really on that. It was still in the changing room from the other day even though I’d been to work and had danced with a dozen guys. I just never seemed to be able to get Jodie out of my mind. I had such a serious crush on him...
It was so embarrassing. Getting a boner from Jodie undoing my bow tie. Thankfully, we purchased some boxer shorts in the next shop we visited – I got enough pairs for two weeks so I’m pretty certain I won’t run out of them – therefore, saving any embarrassment between us going forward...
I finished up my bowl of muesli and drained my coffee. We were travelling down to my mother’s together and changing into our suits there. The idea of arriving wrinkly didn’t appeal to either of us.
I was as nervous as could be. Not for the funeral – but for seeing my family again. Not that we had much of a family. Dad was an only child and Mum had a sister – Aunt Hilary who took me in from sixteen to eighteen. She had two children who were a few years younger in age than me – Eleanor and Ethan. I would guess at them being around thirteen and sixteen now... I couldn’t really remember either of them if I’m honest – I rarely spent any time with them when I was there.
Jodie reached across the centre console as we drove past the ‘Welcome to Rempton’ sign and squeezed my hand, “Are you okay?” he asked.
I glanced at him and nodded, “I think so.” I said, “It’s weird being back here.”
He nodded, “Yeah,” he agreed, “I imagine it is.”
I pulled into Mum’s street and then into the drive up to the house. There were three other cars parked up, none of which I recognised. If Jodie was surprised to see where I’d lived before I got my own place, he didn’t say so. I looked up at the enormous old house with cold fear gripping my heart. I hated this place. I hated everything about the way it made me feel. The only things I liked were my room – and the staff...
I forced myself to get out of the car. Jodie did the same and set about getting our suits from the car boot as I made my way up the steps and rang the doorbell.
The door opened and I found myself face to face with Johnson, my old housekeeper.
I couldn’t stop myself from smiling at his shocked look. “Master River!” he cried, “You’re back!” He gathered me into a bone-crushing hug, “And not a moment too soon – your mother is having a major breakdown through there.”
I froze as I realised that he was pointing towards the drawing room, “I c-can’t go in there.” I said. It was funny, being away from the house, I could rationally go over the events of telling my father that I was gay – and his reaction to it – with little emotion. It was in the past. I’d grown up since then, found a decent set of mates and a good – if different – job. But stepping back inside the house, I felt reduced to the beaten and bloody sixteen year old boy that had dared to admit he preferred boys to girls following a brutal homophobic attack...
Johnson gave my shoulder a squeeze. “He’s not here anymore, Master River.” He said quietly, “And there’s no such thing as ghosts – remember?”
I took a deep breath and nodded. I’d been terribly afraid of ghosts and bogeymen and all sorts of dark creatures when I was small. To combat my fears and to fill my head full of nice stuff to go to sleep on, Johnson used to tuck me up in bed and read the Magic Faraway Tree and when I was a little older, the Famous Five. He was more of a parent to me than my real parents had ever been.
Jodie appeared in the doorway with our stuff and Johnson took them off him. “I’ll show you to your room.” He said to Jodie, “Master River is just going to say hello to his mother.”
Jodie looked at me with raised eyebrows. I smiled back at him, “I’ll be up in a minute – you go ahead and get changed.”
He nodded and followed Johnson up the stairs.
I turned towards the drawing room. I could hear my mother crying and other voices trying to sooth her.
I took a deep steadying breath and forced my feet towards the room.
I peered around the door. I recognised Aunt Hilary first. She was trying to dab Mum’s face with a tissue and was trying to talk her down, “Of course he’ll be here.” She said, “He told you he was coming – he won’t let you down. River’s a good boy.”
“But we let him down... so badly, Hilary.” She wailed loudly, “My baby boy – how could I have done that to him?”
I cleared my throat. She was this upset about me? “Mum?” I said quietly.
Aunt Hilary whirled around with a shocked look on her face, “Rive
r!” she exclaimed delightedly, “You’re here!” She ran towards me and gathered me into her overly perfumed embrace.
I nodded, trying not to breathe in. “Uh, yeah.” I said, “I’m not ready yet – I’ve got to go and get changed...”
I didn’t manage to get any other words out as my mother’s small frame crashed into me with enough force to take me off my feet, “Oh, my boy!” she cried, “How can you ever forgive me?” she sobbed all over me and was finally led to a chair for a drink of water and some dubious looking tablets.
I looked at Hilary in alarm. She smiled and shook her head. “She’s been through hell and back since you left.” She said. “The doctor gave her some tablets for her anxiety – I doubt she’ll need them for long now...”
I raised my eyebrows, “How so?”
Aunt Hilary looked at me, “Well, you know – the problem’s gone now...” she said quietly.
“Dad?” I asked. Was he really such a bully? Well, yeah. I guess he was...
“Your dad refused to let her contact you – but I think he was only scared that you’d reject them both. He missed you too – never stopped talking about you. He followed you on Twitter and Instagram. He was awfully proud of your achievements.”
My jaw dropped. Proud of me? He had a fucking strange way of showing it. This was unbelievable, “But my Twitter feed and my Instagram are both all about my dancing in the gay club.” I said.
She nodded, “I know that.” She said, “I follow you myself – I hope you take proper precautions, young man – I see you have quite a following.”
I grinned, “I do, thanks Aunt Hilary – I’m always rubbered up when I’m dating.”
She chuckled, “Glad to hear it – maybe you can give my son over there some pointers.”
I blinked, “What? You mean Ethan’s gay?”
She shrugged, “Not sure – wouldn’t be half surprised with some of the posters he’s got on his wall – and his best friend, Angus is as gay as gay can be – much to Eleanor’s disappointment.”
River... Redeemed (Studs & Steel Book 2) Page 6