“Go right to the end and there’s a rough lane – take it and you come to the car park on your left. The allotments are right there – you can’t miss his shed – it’s like a luxury log cabin.”
I grinned. “Cool – thanks.”
“And Jodie?”
I turned, “What?” Was I going to get a lecture off him too?
He looked at me, his face serious, “If he means anything to you – stop this madness now – before someone gets hurt.”
I nodded, “I will.” I said, “I promise.”
Chapter 22 – Afraid of rejection...
River
I was startled out of my daydreaming by a soft knock on my shed door.
I got up and went over to the door and opened it.
A very nervous looking Jodie was stood there, “Oh, thank God.” He said, sounding relieved and making me feel guilty even though I had no idea why. “Are you okay? I was worried about you.”
I sighed and nodded, “I was just reading the letter from my dad – like you suggested.”
He nodded biting his lip, “Should I have suggested that you burn it instead.”
I shook my head and smiled at him, “Nah,” I said, “it wasn’t that bad.”
“Can I read it?”
I looked up at him in surprise, “Sure, if you want to.”
He held his hand out and I realised that I was still clutching the letter in my hand. I gave it to him.
He scanned it and looked back at me, “So?” he asked, “How do you feel about it?”
I shrugged, “Dunno, really.” I said, “He could have come to see me in person – he never did.”
Jodie nodded, “Yeah,” he agreed, “Maybe he was afraid of your rejection.”
I nodded. “Maybe – fucking coward. It was my right to reject him after he’d rejected me so forcefully. He never even gave me a chance.” Tears sprung up from nowhere and spilled down my cheeks; seconds later I was in Jodie’s arms.
He was hugging me close and kissing my tears away, “Hey,” he crooned, “You’ve got better people in your life now – people who really care about you.”
I nodded, “And I’m doing everything possible to fuck all of that up, too.” I groaned.
Jodie sighed, “Yeah.” He said, “I know we haven’t been the most sensible we could have been – but you can’t fight your feelings, babe.”
“We have to.” I said, “It’s not fair on Jake.”
Jodie nodded, “I haven’t really been thinking about him,” he admitted, looking at me shamefaced, “I’ve been too preoccupied with you.”
I sighed, “Why did you have to be so damned perfect?”
He shook his head, “I’m not perfect – I’m a cheating scumbag – you’re seriously better off without me in your life.”
Well, that was as maybe – but I was already in love with him. The whole situation had disaster written all over it – but I was in... “I don’t care if I’m better off without you – it is what it is – now kiss me.”
With a bit of a groan he grabbed me and crashed his mouth down on mine, “Oh, God.” He murmured, pulling away for a moment before I pulled him in for another taste of his sweet mouth, “I need this – I need you.”
I nodded, “Need you too.” I muttered, “More than I need the air to breathe...”
Jodie pulled away from me, “But we can’t...”
I nodded, “I know.” I whispered, “I’m sorry.”
Jodie frowned, “Hey – don’t apologise,” he said, “This isn’t your fault.”
I sighed and shook my head, “I made a promise to Jake that I wouldn’t get involved with you.”
His jaw dropped, “Jake thought I’d cheat on him?” he asked.
I shrugged, “More likely he thought I’d take advantage of the situation – and he was right,” I added bitterly, “I totally can’t be trusted – obviously.”
Jodie shook his head, “We were both at fault.”
I sighed and nodded, “Well, then,” I said, “We have to stay away from each other – that way we can’t keep tempting each other.”
He nodded miserably, “Good idea.” He said with a sigh, “Are you off to work soon?”
I nodded, “Yeah,” I said, “And I’ll be back late – don’t wait up.”
He shook his head soberly, “I won’t.”
Chapter 23 – Staying out of each other’s way...
Jodie
Staying out of River’s way was harder than I thought it would be. He was like a powerful magnet that I was finding really difficult to stay away from. I got my phone out and texted a quick message to Jake. Just to let him know I was missing him.
I didn’t get an immediate response – not that I expected one. He was busy at work. A couple of hours later he replied to me with a heart and a smiley face. I sighed. It wasn’t enough...
Everything that I’d thought was perfect in my relationship with Jake suddenly didn’t feel so special and perfect anymore. I’d uprooted myself from my family and everything that was familiar to come here with him –and I’d been happy to do it because I’d stupidly thought that he was the one – that I’d met the man I was going to spend the rest of my life with...
But then I’d met River. Everything in my mind screamed at me to stop this ridiculous madness. He was a player – everyone said so. Everyone. And I could totally see it for myself too – the way he danced and flirted with the other dancers and punters. I had absolutely no idea why he seemed so interested in me... But he was. He couldn’t be acting... He had no reason to – which strongly suggested one of two theories... either he’d finally found the one he wanted... or he didn’t like the fact that Jake had something he didn’t.
I didn’t want to believe it was the latter...
River
I got to work a few days later, earlier than my shift was supposed to start and feeling pretty deflated.
I couldn’t believe what a dick I was being... Jodie and I had decided to try staying out of each other’s way and it really wasn’t going so well for me. I hated knowing that he was sitting up in his room just waiting for me to leave so he could actually move around the house freely – hence leaving early so he was at least allowed some respite.
Alfie was sat at the bar, staring off into space with a smile on his face. He looked utterly love-struck. “You look different.” I said as I leaned on the bar looking at him.
He jumped. He really was miles away. He turned to me with a frown, “What’s different?” he asked defensively.
I shrugged, “You tell me – have you been getting it on with the cop?” Of course he’d been getting it on with the cop – why wouldn’t he? The guy was gorgeous – and clearly smitten with him, too.
Alfie turned bright red. “Well,” he blustered, “I wouldn’t tell you even if I had.”
I grinned, “Hey, I was just gonna say well done on bagging yourself a nice guy, that’s all – it’s nice to see you so happy.” Wish it would happen to me...
He treated me to one of his adorable smiles, “It’ll happen to you one day.” He said brightly.
“Yeah, right.” I could feel my face heating up. I wasn’t about to tell him that I’d found the guy of my dreams but he was already taken. Nothing good could ever come from our indiscretion. Nothing. I had to put it to the back of my mind and stay out of Jodie’s way until Jake got back. Then everything would be alright again. It had to be. Jodie and I had to take our night of passion to the grave. “I doubt that.” I grumbled before getting the hell away from him before I said something I shouldn’t.
I made my way to the podium and climbed up. Might as well get a bit of practice in – shake out all the tension...
The music was thumping and I started to swing around my pole. Alfie appeared seconds later and started to dance at my side. I wasn’t familiar with the moves he was doing – it was obviously a new routine – no wonder he was here early too – he wanted to practice it before the punters arrived.
“Like my moves, man?” he asked
flirtatiously, obviously noticing me looking at him.
I grinned at him and nodded, “Reckon we’ll get some decent tips tonight.” I said. There was no way we wouldn’t – when Alfie and I were together we always got a shed load of cash thrown at us. It was brilliant.
I noticed a movement over at the bar. Harley had arrived. He was sat watching Alfie with a little smile on his face, “Your man’s arrived.” I commented.
Alfie immediately started to make eyes at Harley – and he did it right back. God, they had it bad for each other...
“Oh, man.” I groaned, “Every fucker’s falling in love around here.”
Alfie chuckled “Not you.” He said.
Well, actually I was... but I wasn’t about to tell him that.
Chapter 24 – Siege...
River
It was just another night. I walked into the club, shaking hands with Buzz and pretending that my life was fine and dandy and not going down the toilet. As I’d started to do regularly, I was there earlier than my shift was supposed to start. Before I’d made a total mess of things with Jodie, I would turn up and instantly feel alive and ready for the night ahead but right now my mood was as low as I could ever remember it being.
And I wasn’t the only one feeling like my life was a big pile of steaming shit. Alfie was moping around too – Harley had been pulled off the job and Kody was back. I had no idea what had gone on – and Alfie was totally clueless about it too – seemed that Harley had just disappeared with only a text explaining that he’d gone on secondment somewhere else for a few weeks... Poor bastard. Guys were such dicks... “Go home, Alfie,” I said, “You’re not gonna be any use to anyone in the state you’re in.”
He nodded, sniffing and wiping his eyes with the backs of his hands, “Thanks River – I think I will. I’ll call George.” He headed off to get changed and five minutes later George, his brother, had arrived to take him home.
I sighed. I hoped it would be a good night. The time went faster when everyone got hyped up and the dance floor got crowded.
But that wasn’t exactly likely. It was only Wednesday. I think I might have mentioned that it was the quietest night of the week – well, it definitely used to be anyway – but with the introduction of the themed nights it was steadily getting busier – and tonight was the busiest I’d seen it in a long time. Great. It was going to at least keep my mind off Jodie... Well, maybe.
I’d just climbed up onto my podium, my gut twisting with anxiety over Jake coming back at the weekend and my mind full of Jodie and our promise to each other – that what we felt for each other was real – but just couldn’t go anywhere. I just kept going over everything – just looking for a solution to the whole fucking mess but nothing was forthcoming...
The music was thumping and I closed my eyes, just getting lost in the driving beat. I was jolted out of my brooding by a tap on my shoulder.
I turned, expecting it to be Simon or Thai. When it was a really ugly guy who looked like he was totally ravaged by drugs, my first instinct was to punch his lights out but I felt cold metal against my ribs and I soon changed my mind when I looked down to see a gun held at my side. My insides just about turned to water. Fuck. He was gonna kill me... “W-what do you want?” I asked.
He grinned at me, showing rotting teeth with at least one missing at the front, “Where’s Peyton?” he asked in a voice that was far too high for the way he looked.
Holy shit, was this McCarthy? “He’s not here.” I lied. I’d seen him arriving with Kody in tow not ten minutes earlier. Fuck. The shit was really gonna hit the fan if he knew he was here.
He tilted his head to one side and looked at me with narrowed eyes, “Liar,” he said in a sing-song voice, “I saw him arriving – I was in the car park – now tell me where the little fucker is or people are gonna start dying...”
I shot down the ladder to the floor in seconds. I grabbed Simon’s arm, “Clear the club,” I hissed, “This guy,” I indicated to the podium, “Is fucking crazy – he’s got a gun.”
Simon’s eyes widened with shock, “Fuck off.” He said, but I knew he’d believed me by the look on his face, “How the fuck did he get past Buzz?”
I shrugged, “Probably broke in – he’s after Peyton but he’s off his fucking head on drugs – get the place cleared – now – and if you get the chance, call the emergency services too – I’ve got a horrible feeling we’re going to need them.”
He nodded and shot off towards the bar. I was relieved to notice that the place was emptying out – but it really wasn’t clearing fast enough. The first shot rang out and my blood ran cold as I saw who he’d shot – Rob. Fuck...
I scrambled across the floor and dragged Rob’s limp body to safety behind one of the line of leather chairs that were situated adjacent to the podiums. I didn’t even notice the second shot. I was far too busy saving Rob. “Leave me,” he gasped, “Get yourself out of here, River – you’ve been hurt.”
I glanced down in surprise. He’d shot me too? Fuck. I hadn’t even felt it. I peered a little closer. It was nothing – just a graze really – that was lucky. I shook my head. There was no way I was going to leave him to bleed out. His wound was quite serious. He’d been hit in the shoulder – I was pretty confident that he’d survive – shoulder shots weren’t serious, right? But really, what the fuck did I know about wounds? And he really was losing an alarming amount of blood. I ripped my tee-shirt over my head and bundled it up, praying to any god listening that he didn’t die on me. I pressed it against his shoulder. Rob promptly passed out. Well, that was just great...
A couple more shots rang out and I heard an angry yell and a scream. Fuck. I could hear my heart thundering in my ears and I could feel it in my throat. This really wasn’t going to end well...
Thai and Chase appeared with another couple of guys who’d been hit. “What the fuck are we gonna do with them all?” Thai hissed.
I shrugged helplessly, “Call an ambulance or something?” I asked, “I’d do it – but I’ve got to keep this pressure on Rob’s shoulder.”
Thai nodded, “I’ll do it – these two guys only have surface wounds.”
He got his phone out and dialled 999.
I counted another seven shots. If he’d hit all of his targets, then that was eleven down – so he’d definitely reloaded. Shit, how many rounds had he got on him? If it was only the two then that meant there was at least one more left... The door in the wall opened and Peyton and Kody emerged. Fuck. He still had one bullet left... He was going to kill Peyton...
I looked up and saw Peyton pass me, white-faced and really terrified. Kody was right by his side, his face set determinedly and his gun at the ready. I’d never been more relieved to see him. Surely he’d be able to stop the fucking loon?
I watched in horror as he allowed Peyton to go and face him – what the fuck was he letting him do that for? He was supposed to be the fucking bodyguard, wasn’t he?
I watched Peyton in awe. He must have been bricking it but he was all swagger right up until McCarthy raised his gun and fired straight at him. He hadn’t even fallen to the floor before Kody had fired his own shot – right between McCarthy’s eyes. I felt sick. Kody had stopped him in his tracks with a bullet through his brain. He was totally an, ‘act first, apologise if necessary later’ sort of a guy. Without question he’d acted in self-defence – I saw the whole thing and I would happily give evidence in his defence if need be. I glanced down at the body of Callum McCarthy and immediately wanted to throw up. It really wasn’t pretty...
Kody was beside himself when it became apparent that Peyton had been shot in the leg. I assured him that the ambulances were on their way for all of our injured – thankfully no one had been killed – and he disappeared off in an ambulance with him a few minutes later.
Rob went in the first one, along with a couple of punters, one of whom had been shot in the leg, another in the arm.
Rob squeezed my hand as he was bundled onto a stretcher, “Thanks,
River.” He said, “You’re a diamond.”
I grinned at him, “See you soon, mate,” I said, “I’ll call everyone and tell them you’re okay.”
I didn’t want to go to the hospital but Seth bundled me into an ambulance when he saw my arm had blood all down it. There was no point in protesting – now that the adrenalin had stopped pumping around my system I was pretty much exhausted, ridiculously emotional and fucking hurting... “I’ll call Jodie and let him know you’ll be home late.”
I nodded, “’kay,” I managed to mumble as he helped me into the back of the ambulance, “But I’m sure this isn’t necessary...” I just wanted to go home and cuddle with Jodie... until I remembered that he wasn’t mine to cuddle...
It was hours later that I finally made it home. Buzz was such a trooper. He’d been ferrying us all home after we were patched up and let go. Jodie was waiting up for me.
“Are you okay?” his voice came out of the darkness of the lounge and seconds later, he appeared, his beautiful eyes all big and worried for me.
My heart melted. God he was beautiful... and not mine.
It had become my mantra, the “not mine’ chant in my head all day, every day.
“Yeah,” I glanced down at my hoody that I’d had to zip up since my tee shirt had been totalled.
“When Seth called I started to panic.” He said, “And then Studs was on the late night news and I was so scared when I saw that some guy with a gun had gotten in...”
I nodded, “He was after Peyton – don’t look at me like that – Peyton’s in the hospital – he’s gonna be okay.”
His jaw dropped, “Fuck!” he said, “Did anyone else get hurt?”
I shrugged, “Nothing too serious – this was just a graze on my arm I got when I went to help Rob.”
He took a step towards me and then without saying a word he wrapped his arms around me and kissed me, “I was so scared when Seth called. Never do that to me again.” He whispered when he pulled away from the sweetest kiss I’d ever experienced in my whole life, “I couldn’t bear it...”
River... Redeemed (Studs & Steel Book 2) Page 9