by D. J. Manly
“Juan, I don’t think…”
“Yeah, you don’t think. He’s gone and fallen in love with your sorry ass. And I know you’ve got it bad for him too. It’s all over your face, so what’s wrong?”
Michael sighed. “I told him I loved him last night, and he…he didn’t even say it back.”
Juan took a breath. “I can understand that. He’s a little skittish, and you haven’t exactly been what one could call Mr. Mature.”
“What does that mean?”
“It means I’ve seen you doing a lot of growing up since you’ve been here, Michael. Anthony needs to be sure that you’ve changed before he goes putting his heart on the line. Have you changed, Michael?”
“Yes.”
“Do you think you really deserve him?”
“Probably not.” He smiled.
“There’s more than sex, you know. You have to be compatible on other levels as well.” Juan patted his shoulder, and walked out.
Michael sat there perplexed for a moment, and then he smiled. He understood.
* * * * *
Just before closing, Anthony asked Michael if he was ready to go. “Pretty much. Go ahead. Wait for me in the parking lot, okay?”
“What about your car?”
“I don’t feel like driving tonight. I’ll leave it here. Go ahead. I’ll be right out.”
Anthony waited patiently in the parking lot, glancing up at the night sky. Maybe Michael wanted to talk. He was rehearsing what he was going to say to him when he heard the clacking of high-heeled shoes on pavement. He looked up to see a young woman walking over to him. “Hello, handsome. Give me a ride?”
Anthony blinked. At first he thought she was trying to solicit him, but she wasn’t dressed like a prostitute. The woman was beautifully made up, and elegantly dressed in a tight white dress and matching high heels. “Do we know each other, miss?” he asked politely, narrowing his eyes.
“Yes sexy, we know each other, intimately, in fact.”
Anthony’s eyes widened when he saw the smile. “Michael?”
Michael laughed. “What do you think?”
Anthony couldn’t stop staring at him. He was speechless.
Michael lifted up on his toes and kissed Anthony’s mouth, then wiped at his lips.
“Jesus Christ,” Anthony whispered.
“Anthony,” he said, talking in his own voice now, “I want you to believe that I’ve changed.”
“Michael, you’re wearing a dress. Why are you wearing a dress?”
“Did you hear a word I said? I’m trying to show you that I’ve been a fool. I understand so much more now.”
Anthony took a step back, his gaze moving over him. He was still in shock. “Are you okay?”
“I’ve never been better, actually.” Michael grinned. “It was something that Juan said. He said I had to show you that I’d changed.”
Anthony smiled. “Last night you told me that you loved me. Do you still mean that?”
“Can’t you see?” He laughed.
Anthony met his gaze. “Michael, you don’t need to wear high heels for that. I know every time you touch me. It’s just that I wasn’t sure you’d feel the same tomorrow. As soon as the loving stops, you seem to get cold and…”
“You scare me a little,” Michael whispered. “I’ve never been in love like this before.”
“Hell. You think I have?”
Michael smiled. “I’m glad to hear that. And you are just a tad bit intimidating you know, with every man who sees you falling in love with you.”
“A tad? Oh, how Valley Girl,” he mocked.
Michael hit him.
“You know, you make one hell of a pretty woman. I could get used to it. Do you come with other outfits?”
“Never mind that. You do love me? You do want for us to be together, exclusively? I need for this to be clear.”
“Now, finally, you want clarity? What do you think?”
“I want you to say it.”
“I love you. And I want to be with you, only you, woman.”
Michael wrapped his arms around him, tears in his eyes, then, he started to laugh. “I guess I should tell you…I’m a man, Anthony.”
“Why do I feel as if I’m in “The Crying Game?” he whispered, pressing his lips to his neck.
“The what?”
“I’ll rent it. I knew you didn’t get out much.”
“Give me a proper kiss.”
“You have too much lipstick on,” Anthony protested.
Michael laughed. “Let’s go home, and I’ll take it off.”
“Everything?”
“Yes, unless this turns you on and…?”
Anthony shook his head and winked. He couldn’t get over seeing Michael in a dress. He was still staring at him on the way home.
Michael hit him. “Pay attention to the road, and stop trying to look up my skirt, you perv.”
Anthony smirked. “I’m sure I’d get a pleasant surprise.”
“You bet you would.”
“So, this drag thing, is this going to turn into a habit, or what?”
Michael grinned. “I don’t think so. The shoes are killing me.”
“Will you do it one night at the club?”
“If you will.”
Anthony threw back his head and howled with laughter. “Honey, you wouldn’t want to see me in a dress. It’s kind of like Freak Show meets Halloween.”
“I don’t believe it. Will you do it once for me?”
“Sweetheart --” Anthony glanced over at him and then placed his hand on his knee. “-- as long as you love me, I’ll do just about anything for you.”
* * * * *
After Michael got out of the dress and took off the makeup, he went downstairs to the living room. Out of the blue, Anthony announced that he wanted to redecorate the room upstairs. “We could make it our room.”
“Make it our bedroom?”
Anthony nodded.
Michael came over to where Anthony was sitting on the sofa. Anthony looked up at him. Michael grabbed his face between his hands and kissed him hotly. Anthony’s hands came up around him and squeezed his buttocks. “Take me to bed,” Michael urged, pulling Anthony to his feet.
They stumbled together through the kitchen where Anthony took the stairs two at a time, leaving Michael to breathlessly chase him down the hallway. When he went into Michael and Daniel’s old room, Michael hesitated.
Anthony stopped at the entrance and looked at him. He extended his hand. “Come and love me,” he said softly.
He didn’t need to ask him twice, not with that tone of voice. Michael stepped into the room and dragged Anthony’s T-shirt over his head, then went to work on his pants. “Um, you’re already hard.”
“I’m used to being hard around you.”
Michael looked at him. “Were you ever intending to tell me that you loved me?”
“Shut up, will you? I already told you.” He pushed his pants and underwear off and stepped out of them, then, he began to undress Michael. He slowly undid the buttons on his shirt, kissing his way over his chest to his stomach, then, dropped to his knees to undo his jeans.
Michael closed his eyes, his trembling fingers moving in Anthony’s thick dark hair. “I love you. Somewhere along this crazy ride my father sent us on, I fell in love with you. You do believe me? You do believe that I’ll never change my mind. This is forever for me.”
Anthony’s lips moved over his cock as he pushed his jeans down over his hips. For a second, he pressed his face to his groin. He didn’t move.
“Anthony?” He felt his arms wrap around him tight now. “Anthony? You weren’t lying to me when you said you loved me, were you?”
“Would I lie to a beautiful woman?”
Michael stroked his hair. “You’re too much of a gentleman for that.”
Anthony laughed, then, he raised his gaze to him. They looked unusually bright in the dark. “I love you so much, Michael. I never thought I’d love like
this. It’s a little overwhelming. I’ll make you happy. I promise.”
Michael dropped to his knees and pulled him roughly into his arms. “Anthony, oh Anthony. I don’t actually breathe unless I’m touching you. I dream about you. I dream about you being inside me and…”
Anthony kissed his lips gently. “You won’t change your mind tomorrow? My heart won’t take it.”
“Baby, I’ll love you forever. I promise. You’re everything I’ve ever wanted. I thank God for bringing me here.”
Anthony kissed him again. This time the kiss pressed Michael to the floor. Anthony’s lips found their way over his body and down to his sex where they lingered until Michael begged for him to take him. Anthony possessed him there, with Michael on all fours. He took him roughly, passionately, not holding back, and Michael knew that he wanted to be here with him for the rest of his life.
* * * * *
The next day, Anthony kissed him awake. In the shower, he held him, thinking that being in love like this was nothing short of a miracle.
When they were dressed, Anthony walked downstairs with Michael and before they got to the kitchen, Anthony put a hand on his shoulder and said, “There’s something I want to do today. You’re not obligated, but if you want, you can come with me to the cemetery.”
Michael looked at him. He touched his cheek and smiled. “I’ll come with you, baby. Thanks for asking me.”
A few hours later, they stood together hand and hand in front of Michael and Daniel’s graves. “Do you think they’re together somewhere?” Michael asked, placing his hand on his father’s gravestone.
“I don’t know, but I sure as hell hope they are.”
They were there around ten minutes when Anthony led Michael away by the hand. “Come on,” he said, placing his arm around his shoulders, “next week we’ll come back with some nice roses. Michael loved roses. Daniel used to bring him yellow ones. Let’s go and have a cappuccino.”
Michael nodded. “Okay. Then what do you want to do?”
“Go home,” he growled. “I can’t wait to get you back in bed.”
“To hell with the cappuccino,” Michael grinned. “Race you to car.”
* * * * *
No one at the club seemed surprised when Anthony finally announced at the club that he and Michael were together. Hollio actually shrugged in his high heels and tiara, looked around at the others, and yelled out, “Quelle surprise. Is anyone here surprised that Michael and Anthony are doing the dirty deed every night?”
There was a chorus of “no,” which caused both Anthony and Michael to laugh.
“I say it’s about damn time,” Ron announced. “You guys have been dancing around it for long enough.”
“You can’t deny love.” Juan looked at Michael. “Your father knew that, and so did Daniel.” He looked at Anthony and gave him a tender smile. “’Bout time someone grabbed you up, sweetie…all that muscle and good looks, not to mention a heart of gold. You deserve it, honey, and if he isn’t good to you, you tell me, and I’ll beat him within an inch of his life.”
Michael made a face. “Damn, I’d better toe the line.”
“You bet your ass,” Juan said, the smile fading.
Michael knew he was serious, but Juan had nothing to worry about in that department.
Jason didn’t say much, but at the end of the evening, he came over to Michael and said, “I hope you know what you’ve got there.”
“I do. I really do. I know I’m the luckiest guy in the world.” He glanced over at Anthony, who was pestering Juan about something, which earned him a slap.
Jason held out of his hand. “Congratulations for waking up. You be good to my brother.”
“I will.” Michael took his hand. “Friends?”
“How about family?”
Michael smiled. “Even better.”
Jason reached over and gave him a hug, and Michael hugged him back.
Epilogue
Fall and winter disappeared, and spring came. Anthony and Michael got the call from Hubert Collins’ office. Their two years were up. They had to come and sign some papers, papers which would transfer Michael’s inheritance to him, and relinquish them from their obligations.
“Well, Michael,” Hubert said as both young men came into his office and sat down, “you’re on your own now. You can manage your own money. Also, the two of you can decide together what you will do with Impressions.”
Michael glanced at Anthony.
Hubert leaned forward. “Out of curiosity, will you sell…because if you’re interested, I know someone who…?”
“Why would I want to sell something my father worked so hard to build?” Michael announced, surprising the lawyer.
Anthony sat back in his chair, folding his arms across his chest. “Michael’s going to manage Impressions. I’ll keep my hand in, but I want to go back to school.”
Collins seemed surprised. “Really? To do what?”
“I don’t know. I think I’d like to teach music.”
Collins nodded. “A noble profession.” He looked at Michael. “I’m surprised that you’ve decided to keep running Impressions, especially the way you felt about it two years ago.”
“Well, I’ve done a great deal of growing up since then.” He looked at Anthony and smiled. “Besides, Impressions is a success. Why wouldn’t I want to run it? I’ve discovered that I’ve got quite a head for business. I’ve enrolled in a business course at UCLA.”
“Smart man. Okay, so all that’s left is to sign the papers and you two can go your separate ways.”
“Fat chance. I’m not letting Anthony go anywhere,” Michael muttered, then, laughed as Anthony lifted an eyebrow at him, clearing his throat.
Collins grinned. “Seems a lot has changed. Last time you guys were in my office, I thought you’d wind up killing each other.”
“Yes,” Anthony said, leaning over and giving Michael a quick kiss, “a lot has changed.”
Collins smiled, then passed them some papers, and told them where they both needed to sign. Finally after double-checking the signatures, he nodded and stood up. “Well, that just about does it.” Suddenly he put a hand to his head. “Oh, I almost forgot.” He reached in the drawer of his desk. He handed Michael a white envelope. “Your father left this for you when he made out his will.”
“What is it?” Michael asked, taking it in his hand.
“A letter from your father. You know, maybe I never told you this but Michael always suspected that he’d die young. I guess that’s why he wrote this.”
“He told me that often as well.” Anthony smiled sadly. “But he always had a flair for the dramatic so I never paid much attention.”
Collins nodded. “If he had lived longer, well, parts of his will would have been quite redundant. He seemed to change after Daniel died…I’m going off track here. He left instructions for this to be opened only when the two years were up, and, thankfully, I remembered.”
“Thanks,” Michael said, curiously fingering the letter.
* * * * *
Michael was quiet in the car. He was staring at the envelope in his hand. When they were back at the house, Michael turned to Anthony and said, “I don’t mind if you stay with me while I read it. We’ll read it together.”
“No. You read it on your own. It’s between you and your father. When you’re finished, come upstairs. I have something to show you.”
Michael raised his eyebrows up and down. “Oh, baby, if it’s what I think it is, it’s a piece of art.”
Anthony laughed. “Not that, although you can see that too, if you want, anytime.”
“Wow, a standing invitation. I want. I want. Not anytime, all the time.”
Anthony winked at him.
Then Michael gasped. “I know what it is; you finished the room, didn’t you?”
Anthony nodded.
Michael let out a shout and hugged him. “I can’t wait.”
“Read your letter first.”
Micha
el nodded. When he was completely alone, he sat on the sofa, opened up the envelope with trembling fingers, and began to read:
My Dearest Son, Michael,
If you are reading this, it means that you have just spent two years (I hope) running Impressions, and two years sharing a house with Anthony. It also means that I am dead. I suspected that I would never live to be an old man, and after I lost my beloved, I didn’t really want to.
What I did want, above all else was for you to know me, but as time went on, I realised that it probably wasn’t going to happen while I was alive. Well, better late than never…ha, ha.
This was the only way I knew how to give you a glimpse of who I was. I was Impressions. I was Daniel and Anthony, and all my dear friends at the club. They were all a part of me, and I was a part of them. Too bad you never got to meet Daniel. You would have liked him.
You need to know that Anthony has been a son to me, and I love him dearly, but I never forgot you, Michael. The day you were born was the happiest day of my life, but I couldn’t live the life my family wanted me to. I couldn’t be the man your mother needed. There was too much inside me. I would have curled up and died there. I would have made your life hell as well. I tried to see you, but your mother thought it best that I didn’t. I don’t blame you for not coming. You didn’t understand then, but you probably do now. I hope you see that life is filled with differences, and it is in those differences we find true meaning. The best thing you can be in life is yourself. People will never respect you for trying to fit in. Believe me, I know.
So, with all the regret I feel for not being there for you as you grew up, this is my gift to you, my way of asking your forgiveness…of giving you something back…even if it had to be forced on you, even if you might not have appreciated it right away. I hope it accomplished what I thought it would.
Oh yes, and about Anthony. How can I forget how Anthony factors into all this? Well, he is my greatest gift to you. And if there is a God in the heavens above, you already adore him. I know how sad he was after Daniel died, and now that I am gone too, he must feel totally alone. But, I’m not really gone. I have left part of me behind in you. Anthony is a good man. If he loves you, he will love you forever. He’ll never let you down. And he’s quite a hunk as well, don’t you think?