Zee would ask the same thing, ‘Why are you thinking so much about Aariz?’
I did not understand this feeling, myself.
Suddenly, I felt weight of a hand on the back of my chair, bringing me out of my thoughts.
Before I could turn around, I saw Zee greeting over my head,
“Hey Aariz! Finally you have arrived.”
Stunned, I craned my neck to see it really was, in all his glory, the man ruling my thoughts these days...Aariz, looking steamy in a black button-down shirt and black trousers.
For some wierd reason, I wondered if I looked steamy to him in my navy blue cocktail dress. Self-consciously moving a hand through the waves of my open hair, I discarded this thought as rubbish. Who cares what he thinks of me?!
He greeted everyone, while standing behind me with his hand still on the back of my chair. He was mingling with everyone except me and thus, disturbing me immensely for some reason.
He spoke to everyone, as if I was not there. It was completely Zee’s fault. What was the need to invite this guy in the first place?!
Ooh! Now I get it. This means Aariz had lied to me about not having Zee's phone number. When I blurted that we were going out, he must have called up Zee and got himself invited. Very smart!
Everyone asked him to take a seat. Since I kept glaring at him with the expense of straining my neck, I could not help but notice something pass between him and Ibbi, who sat beside me.
As if Aariz was his date, Ibbi stood up and graciously offered his chair to Aariz, while he went around the table to sit on the empty chair next to Zee.
Wierd.
We ordered, and shortly our food arrived. I gobbled on my noodles, avoiding every other dish.
I heard Aariz whisper, as if talking to himself,
“Looks like its madam's favourite dish.”
An involuntary blush crept on my face and the matter turned worst, as while eating, every now and then his arm would brush against my bare one, leaving me in goose bumps.
Going breathless and unable to take the close proximity anymore, I stood up.
“Sani, you need something? Any problem?” asked Aariz, in a loud carrying voice.
Everyone looked at me puzzled.
“Um...I was just taking the glass of water.” That was all I could mutter.
Having no other option, I sat down again with water in hand, glaring at him, to recieve an amused smile in response, combined with a wink.
Halfway through the dinner, Zee went to the washroom. After he came back, he gave me a wicked look and I knew what was about to come next, when he started speaking,
“Sani you look stunning tonight. Just now while I was returning from the washroom, a few guys were asking me about you.”
Before I could say anything in answer, Aariz interrupted angrily,
“Wait a minute Zidaan! Some random guys asked you about Sani and you just answered them and came back? She is your friend or what! You should have broken their jaws!”
Zee and I tried hard to appear serious and not laugh. We were the only two who knew this game. No one else did. All my cousins felt that either it was some sort of inside joke of ours or we were just plain stupid. Anyway, they were used to it, so ignored us. Not Aariz though, he was interested and scowling.
I gave Zee a warning look, not to include Aariz in it. In addition, personally, I ignored him like; he had ignored me, while flirting openly with my friends in college.
Smirking at Zee, I had a saucy comeback ready,
“It’s nothing in comparison to your looks. Girls were staring at you when we entered inside the restaurant.”
“Really?” Zee became seriously excited.
In addition, Aariz turned to look at me with heated eyes saying in accusatory tones,
“You’re being wierd. You don't care a bit, that any riff-raff guy enquires about you, stares at you? You’re taking it so casually!”
Zee again tried to intervene and explain to Aariz, but I glared, and stopped him.
Trying to appear all cool and casual, I told Aariz, “So what? They just praised me in front of Zee. Maybe they found me pretty. What is wrong in that? They enquired about me, so he must have answered them his way and came back. End of story. What is there to discuss in it? Why should I care so much?”
Aariz did not say anything further.
After finishing dinner, we started to leave the restaurant. I stood outside, waiting for Zee to bring the car. Aariz was going to leave in his own car but before that, I guess he had something else in mind, as he marched towards me. With a formidable glare, he asked me to step aside with him, saying he needed to have a word.
Shrugging my shoulders, I walked with him to the corner.
He started without a preamble, his words dripping with condensation and utter furiousness,
“What were you saying inside? ‘So what, Aariz they were just praising me.’”
Aariz rolled his eyes and continued,
“It’s not called praise Sani. They were lusting after you. And you still have no problem with that! They were enquiring about you, staring at you, when they don't even know you. They had no right, absolutely none! And instead of reprimanding Zidaan, you were telling me, ‘So what?!’” He yelled in my face, making me flinch.
I should have told him earlier itself. Shit! He is getting ‘all-protective-friend of best-friend–and-Prof’ combined on me now.
I rolled my eyes for the dramatic effect and said in a soothing voice,
“You are still stuck up on that? Okay fine, I confess it was just a game. Mine and Zee's inside joke.”
Then I went on to explain him all about the game and also that in reality no one had asked Zee anything about me nor had any girl stared at Zee. We were both just fake praising each other. It was just a joke between us.
“Then why didn’t you say so earlier? Do you have any idea how angry I was? I wanted to hammer those guys!” Aariz snapped at me, scolding me so much.
Haww! How dare he scold me?! I have to set him straight. He must know I do not get intimidated so easily. Hah! Hear me roar!
“It was mine and Zee's inside joke. Personal. Why would I tell you about it? I had no idea you’d get so worked up and mad at me for that. Whatever it was, why the hell are you shouting at me? WHY DO YOU CARE SO MUCH?” I yelled, thoroughly confused by Aariz's behaviour.
He wordlessly left from there. Thus, leaving me even more confused.
Why didn’t he fight me back? Was it my imagination, or did his eyes looked hurt?
12-Liked her
Aariz
Her words, ‘Why do you care so much?’ were like a punch in the gut. I couldn’t live with them.
Did she not understand, if not her, whom else would I care for?
I had never tried to force her, to hurt her. I just wanted to be there for her, but she stops me every step of the way. She runs away from me. Is it so wrong to love someone? Am I so bad that she can't even let me ‘know’ her, give me the time of the day, try to know me, ‘see’ me for just a moment?
“Aariz dear, at least have some lunch. You already skipped breakfast.” Granny barged into my room with a trey in hand.
I had lost the count of times I told her I am fine!
“Gran this looks yum!” Zidaan dived into whatever she had in the trey. “Ummm...Even tastes yum.” Munching on the food, he took the plate from her hand and settled on the beanbag near the window, where I stood.
Zidaan continued with his mouth full,
“Aariz, you want some? You can go have it from the kitchen I guess.”
God this is frustrating...
“What has happened to him? He was with you last night, right?” Granny enquired.
On his nod, she went on shaking her head, “What went wrong then? Since he returned, he is not himself.”
I took a deep breath to calm the hell down. But before I could open my mouth, Zidaan opened his,
“He is bummed about a girl.”
“Leave.
Me. Alone.” I punctuated each word with a glare at the pair of them, halting Gran mid-step in her consolatory speech she was preparing for.
She scurried out of my room looking heartbroken.
Shit!
“No sausages for you.” Zidaan snarled biting on two at a time.
On my continued silence, he stood up and came towards me with his arms crossed and a serious expression on his face.
“What are you doing?”
“Just leave...Please.”
“This is the Aariz from two years ago, who killed himself and treated everyone like trash because he was hurting. Don't let that Aariz overpower you. You are better than that.”
I closed my eyes unable to bear the memories.
Opening them back up, I snapped, “What do you expect me to do? It’s over. I'm not gonna go crawling back to her.”
He just raised his eyebrows, looking right through my pretence.
I sighed heavily and gave up, “I have lost it. I have lost her. I have no idea what to do.”
Zidaan scoffed, “Of course you know. After all you have done this to yourself.”
I gave him a look to cut it out.
That made him hold my shoulders as if trying to shake me, “Aariz it’s her...Sani! You know very well that being friends with her is like being friends with trouble. She is trouble.”
“She is not.” I warned him.
He went on as if he did not hear me, “And you are trying to get that trouble into your life on a forever stay.”
“Nothing of that sort...” I could not look him in the eye.
Zidaan waved it off, “Oh save it. I can see it on your face.”
“She does not care anymore. She has changed.” I stated coldly to which he beseeched me with a genuine pleading voice, “No she hasn’t. Trust me.”
Gulping hard, I turned my focus towards the window facing Zidaan's house, “The girl I knew would have never done that. Never said those words to me without thinking how I would feel.”
There she was, having fun with Umber in Zidaan's backyard, apparently waiting for him.
“She does not know who you are yet. Not in any way!” He yelled in annoyance.
He had not seen her yet. I had. Only I knew what storm of emotions were roaring in my heart watching her.
Zidaan went on pressing sternly, “If you don't wanna tell her yet, at least show her. Remind her how you cared for her, show her that affection, force her to acknowledge your presence in her life, make her remember what you guys were. How she was a dog with a bone about you. At least give her the reason for which you are fighting this battle. Why you are so much in love with her!”
“I'm not falling for her yet.” I answered quietly, keeping my gaze locked on her.
Zidaan chuckled, “You have already passed that stage my boy.”
“And hey, there is no reason to like someone. We just do.” I murmured, still not turning towards him.
Zidaan threw his arm around my shoulder joining me at the window, “Not you. You did not just fall for her. By the way, I repeat, you are well past the stage of ‘like’.”
I remained silent as we stood staring at Sani.
The backyard, her being there, brought back so many memories. Just the situation we were in right now was different.
I agreed with Zidaan. It was true; I did not just fall for her. I liked her for herself, for her everything with my, everything. Now I guess, it was not enough. Would never be enough.
Breaking the moment, Zidaan's phone rang.
He answered it,
‘Hey Sani.’
‘Alright, I'm coming.’
Hanging up the phone he turned towards me,
“You already know she has arrived. I have to go. Sorry, man...I will see you later. And I will try to find out everything I had promised.”
“No need. I don't want to know. Not anymore.” I gave him a reassuring smile. At least I tried to.
“Don't give-up so easily.” Zidaan patted my back before leaving.
I continued to stare out of the window. She had disappeared inside his house, but then she came back, making me wonder if we, our moments were broken, or if we still had a chance?
Sani
Entire night had passed since the restaurant fiasco with Aariz. It was over. I should have been over it too. After all, he was not a part of my life. Still, try as I might, I couldn’t find one bit of comfort. I felt restless, knowing I owe him an apology, although, I did not consider myself that big a sinner.
It was Aariz's fault. Why was he getting all cave man possessive on me? It was not as if we were together or something.
Therefore, to get over him and this guilt, I decided to meet Zee for a much-needed distraction.
That is why; here I was at Zee's place along with my dearest cousin Umber in tow. I sometimes wished Umber and I, were in the same college. It would have been so much better to ward off Aariz, and his thoughts with her help. But we were not in the same college. That made it uncomfortable for me to share my non-relation whatever thing I had going on with Aariz. It was confusing my brilliant mind off. So, what would I tell her?
In addition, recounting to her would mean talking and thinking about Aariz even more then I already was. That is why I never shared anything with anyone...Ever. It was tiring to think about all the explanations. If I actually started doing the sharing thing, I would be exhausted before I had even solved the problem!
Yet, I wanted to somehow, keep Zee in the loop about all of this. After all, he was friends with Aariz. I did not want it to get awkward in future. I was even ready to go with the recalling of each fight and moments I have had with Aariz, which were messing up my mind as I kept thinking about their possible meanings. Not to forget, Aariz's winks! They always created havoc in my heart.
But, Zee was not even home.
Why couldn’t things be as I wish them to be for once? Arrggg!
I called him up and was currently waiting for him in his backyard, after his assurance of being there in a moment.
Umber turned to me with a naughty smile slowly making its way on her lips.
“What?” I asked distractedly, while trying Zee's number again as two minutes had already passed and he had still not arrived.
“Why don't you ever talk to Zidaan about...this thing?” Umber smiled goofily wiggling her eyebrows.
Now I was not that happy about being here with her.
“What thing? I don't have any problem.” I muttered in irritation.
Umber shook her head saying quickly,
“No, not because he is a shrink. I mean, about you and him. You know...” She winked.
Actually winked, with a suggestive kind of smile!
I did not dare think what suggestions she was trying to throw my way with that mischievous look on her face.
Her expressions...her words felt strange, gross, and overall stupid. She could not really be trying to say what I thought she was trying to say!
Losing the smile and the entire cool from my face, I stared at her sharply and tatted in the curtest voice I could manage, “I actually don't. What ‘he and me,’ exactly?”
To be honest, I completely understood what she was trying to imply. But I refused to see it. Because, if she had lost her marbles, poor she. I couldn’t even pretend to entertain that line of thinking.
“Um...It’s just high time; people see two good ingredients that have always been kept next to one another in the fridge, when mixed can make wonders. People should try it. For example...uh...egg and cheese?” Umber grinned trying to be extra cherry.
I rolled my eyes, giving her a determinedly bored look,
“You are decades late. People have already tried it.”
“And it worked! Who does not love a cheese omelette?”
“So?” I raised my eyebrows and she started pondering over her answer.
My goodness she was serious! I just asked sarcastically and she...God!
Clasping my hand with a lovely emotional smile as
if I was three, she said softly,
“You and your Zee are too closely knitted to ever survive without each other. So maybe you guys must think...”
“About becoming an omelette.” I nodded with clenched jaw.
“Or a cake?” She nudged me as if I was on board with her crazy idea.
“We are going to pretend this never happened.” I warned her. Actually threatened with blazing eyes and complete glaring thing.
“What never happened? That you guys literally can’t get enough of each ot...”
“That we ever had this conversation.”
“But...”
I did not let her finish, and paced around her thanking God, as I told her, “I can't be glad enough that you and I don't study in the same college. Otherwise, God knows the amount of crap you would have given me, when I’d have told you, Zee has offered me a ride to college whenever he has early morning appointments. So I don’t have to take a train or bus every day. My ears would have fallen off by now with the insanity you would have turned this innocent offer into.”
“He will be dropping you?!” Umber went all ooh and aah over it.
Somebody dig me a hole to hide into...Please!
Before she could go on with the omg's and all that, I forced myself to smile and rounded on her, “Talking about college, what’s going on? Found any hot guy to crush on? Anyone caught your eye? Tell me the juicy stuff. Let’s gossip about you, instead of trying to link me with your cousin.”
Just then, Zee came into view.
Now my smile wasn’t forced. I was smirking in victory,
“And here comes your cousin, who I'm sure is gonna get all protective jerk on you about the guys in your life.” As he came near, I whispered cuttingly,
“And you will deserve it.”
“I don't think he’ll be that angry if it concerns me. But can't say the same if it’s about you, his best friend.” Umber shrugged unperturbed by my threats.
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