by Golden Angel
"I just meant I hadn't meant to kiss him the way I did," she confessed, still smiling. Both Alec and Gavin were good at making her smile, even when she felt uncomfortable. "I..."
Now she floundered again, because the truth was she'd gotten caught up in the moment. Caught up in feeling like she was desirable, like she mattered. Caught up in being touched. And her doe had definitely not helped either.
Even now, she could feel her doe eyeing Gavin like he was a particularly tasty piece of pie. Grinning, he leaned on the counter across from her, with no idea how close he was to getting jumped on. Kiara didn't know if her hormones were out of control, or if this was a side effect of her doe becoming a hybrid (and also a floozy apparently), or if she was just that desperate for any male attention and affection. She was very worried it might be the last option motivating her the most.
"I don't want another mate," she blurted out.
Gavin blinked. A frown lines began to form on his forehead. "Another mate?"
The flush that washed over her now wasn't embarrassment, it felt more like shame. Kiara averted her eyes from him, nodding.
"Sweetie..." Gavin came around the side of the counter so he was next to her, his fingers sliding under her chin and tilting her head back to look at him. "You aren't mated."
"Yes I am," she said, scowling at him.
To her supreme annoyance, his lips twitched in amusement. "No, you aren't. Your doe wouldn't have let you kiss Alec if that had been the case, and we would smell a male's scent mixed with yours."
"Jesse said deer are a little different," she argued crossly. She did not appreciate being told she didn't have a mate. Of course she did, otherwise what had she been doing with Sebastian all this time?
Tilting his head, Gavin opened his mouth and started to say something, then closed it. He looked at her, obviously thinking hard. "Sweetheart, why don't you tell me why you think you're mated."
Her temper stoked just enough to not care that the way her community found mates was apparently different from everyone else, she told him about Sebastian.
Chapter 4
Almost as soon as Riley came in the door, Gavin sprinted out, practically bursting out of his skin and into his stag. He nearly stumbled, he shifted so quickly, but managed to get himself balanced before hitting the woods, bounding away in a flash of red fur and antlers.
Concerned, Riley turned back into the house. "Kiara?"
"I'm here." The glum response made his step quicken. She was sitting at the counter, poking what looked like the crust of a sandwich. As he came closer she looked up, her expression sad. Riley wasn't sure what had Gavin in such a state, but obviously it had something to do with Kiara. He'd gotten the text message from Gavin, asking Riley to come and cover his shift with the doe, and immediately hurried over. It wasn't like Gavin to call for someone to relieve him of a duty.
"Is everything okay?" he asked, feeling awkward and uncertain as he moved toward her. She looked so sad, but Riley didn't know what to do. Should he hug her? Pat her back? Keep his distance? It all depended on what was making her sad, so he needed more information.
"I think I made Gavin angry," she said morosely, still poking her sandwich crust instead of looking at him. Riley moved over to sit on the stool next to her. He didn't argue with her assessment. The evidence certainly indicated Gavin was upset at the very least and, as Riley had not been present for the inciting incident, Kiara's hypothesis had more weight than any guess he could make. His stag roused, pressing against his mind and insisting he fix whatever the problem was.
"How did you do that?" he asked. Hopefully if he knew what had happened he could work through to a solution. Also, he had a fair amount of curiosity running rampant, since it took quite a bit to work Gavin up into a lather.
As Kiara sadly told him about her 'mate' and her old community, Riley understood why Gavin had called him for backup instead of Dorian or Alec. While her story had probably sent Gavin into a roaring fury, it would have deranged Dorian, and Alec was a complete hothead. They'd both have been shouting and ranting before she'd even finished, and that was obviously not what their pretty doe needed right now. Riley would not consider himself the first choice for comforting anyone—he knew he didn't always relate very well to people outside of his brother and cousins—but he was at least able to hold on to his rising fury.
"Is it true?" she asked him tearfully, straining his resolve to remain calm and logical for her, looking up at him with big, Bambi eyes. "I wasn't actually mated to him? It was just... just breeding? The whole community, everything they said was a lie?"
"Yes," he said, as gently as he could, now wishing he had some back up as her lower lip quivered. Her lashes fluttered as she blinked faster, trying to hold back tears. Riley spoke quickly, hoping to get all the information out and stem the threatening distress. "Although different shifter types do sometimes differ in their mating, there is always a marker to indicate when a mating has occurred, to warn off other possibly interested parties—oh please don't do that..."
Feeling utterly helpless, he held out his hands to her as she burst into tears.
"Sorry... sorry..." she said, sniffling and gulping and obviously trying to hold back her overflowing emotions and stifle her sobs.
She's leaking! His stag jabbed at him, both startled and upset. Fix her!
Riley was distressed enough he couldn't even be amused at his animal's description of her tears.
What would Dorian do? Riley asked himself helplessly, wishing he had one of his take-charge cousins here to help, or even his younger brother. Alec was good at cheering people up. He definitely hadn't meant to make her think she couldn't cry. Riley could start there.
"No, I'm sorry," he said, standing up and pulling her into a hug. Hugs were good. Crying females liked hugs. She nuzzled against him and his deer chuffed in approval. Okay, so far so good. "You can cry. I shouldn't have asked you not to." He patted the back of her head awkwardly and the smell of strawberries rose up from her hair. It was nice. Actually, just having her snuggled up to him was nice. Except for the crying. That part wasn't nice at all.
They had all agreed to take their time with her, but she seemed to need the physical comfort. Her arms had wrapped around him and she was burrowing into his chest like it was a den and she was ready to hibernate.
Making a snap decision—not his usual forte, but with the anxious pushing of his stag it seemed a logical route—Riley guided her away from the kitchen counter and over to the couch where he could at least hold her more comfortably. To his relief, she didn't seem at all upset by the relocation and the rate of her weeping reduced much faster as he cradled her on his lap. Physical contact seemed to be key, something which he made a mental note of for the future.
As she calmed, so did his stag, much to his relief. Of course, while he had calmed emotionally, his physical reaction was quite different. He was far too aware of her rounded bottom nestled into his lap, her breasts pressed against his chest, and the scent of strawberries from her shampoo wafting around him. Riley prayed she didn't notice the hardening shaft pressing against her thigh. He liked having her cuddled up to him like this and he didn't want to give her a reason to move.
"You're very nice," she murmured, snuggling in, her head pressed against his shoulder. Riley's protective urges soared, reflecting on everything she'd been through. Not just since becoming stricken with the Scourge, but before that. Her upbringing sounded very unusual and not at all conducive to being independent or free-thinking, and yet she had escaped even knowing she'd be risking her life by doing so, determined to make a new start. He didn't think he'd ever met someone so strong or brave before. There was no way to actually quantify such traits, of course, but he knew it was true.
Her even breathing indicated she'd fallen asleep again. Dr. Tran had warned them she would be quite tired, eating and sleeping a lot as her body recovered. Terrified to wake her, Riley froze in place.
He'd seen memes online about people refusing to mo
ve after their pet crawled onto their lap, but he'd never understood why until now.
Not that Kiara was a pet.
Riley made a mental note never to speak the comparison aloud.
******
The sound of the door opening and male voices woke Kiara. She was so warm and comfortable it took her a moment to remember everything that had happened before she fell asleep. And another moment to realize she was still on Riley's lap, in his arms. Squeaking, she vaulted up.
Or, well, she tried to.
His leanly muscled arms were still wrapped around her body, meaning she only got about halfway through her leap before she was yanked back down as he came awake with a jerk of startled surprise.
"Sorry, didn't mean to startle you," Alec said, breezing over to drop a kiss on the top of her head, completely fine that she was sitting on his brother's lap, in his arms, even though she'd been kissing him earlier. "Were you taking a nap?"
"Yes, I was tired," she said, a bit shyly as Gavin followed Alec over.
"Hey beautiful," he said, also dropping a kiss on her head, also completely fine with her position on Riley's lap. "I'm sorry I ran out earlier. I was just so angry at all the people who treated you terribly and my stag was so riled, I had to get out and run."
"You weren't angry with me?" she asked, both surprised and delighted, before remembering she had decided she wasn't going to get attached to these men. Any of them. She was still on the run from Sebastian—with no way of knowing whether or not he was still chasing her—and she didn't really know them. No matter how she was drawn to them or attracted to them, it was a bad idea. There were four of them after all; she hadn't been able to ever keep Sebastian's attention for a full night. Even if they thought they were interested in her now, she'd never be able to satisfy one of these virile, confident, sexy men, much less all of them. It was better to protect herself and keep away.
Wasn't it?
Gavin lifted her up from Riley's lap and over the back of the couch, making her squeak at the sudden movement. She opened her mouth to protest, only to find her lips suddenly occupied with a smoldering hot kiss that had all of her anxieties and self-doubts fleeing in the face of sudden, passionate desire.
She felt a little dizzy when he released her, her body even warmer than it had been when she first woke up. Setting her on her feet, Gavin gave her a wink.
"Not even a little bit angry at you, sweetie."
Relief suffused her, and then a spark of disappointment as Dorian headed into the kitchen, sending her nothing more than a smile. Her doe huffed in disapproval.
Darn it. She shouldn't be disappointed about that!
Pushing aside her wanton desires, Kiara went to offer her help.
Dinnertime was a revelation. Not only did all of the males contribute to the making of the meal—not allowing her to do more than sit at the counter and chop vegetables for them (she wasn't going to tire herself out that quickly, but they insisted)—but they took their time over dinner to entertain her. Funny stories about growing up together, a lot of stories about Gavin and Alec's prank wars, descriptions of their own families (Gavin and Dorian "only" had two fathers, Alec and Riley had five!), and very gentle questions about her own life. If she hesitated too much or became reticent, they quickly picked up the thread of conversation until she was giggling helplessly again.
Gavin and Alec were definitely the two entertainers, while Riley was the quietest, and Dorian fulfilled what she thought of as the 'fatherly' role. Which made her think of one of the very naughty books she'd edited for work—Daddy Dorian would make a great book. She'd read it. So often she'd escaped into one of the books she'd been sent to edit, where people's lives were so much more enjoyable than the life she'd been living. Her dinners had mostly been eaten alone. Even when she had eaten with the others in her community, it hadn't been like this. The other Pudu deer females had all eaten mostly quietly, content in their solitude and not wanting real connections with each other. Maybe because they had all been competing for attention from the same males.
She was practically crying from laughing so hard when Alec aimed a spoonful of peas at Gavin, threatening him from across the table, while Dorian frowned sternly and warned him he better not in a deeply imposing voice which seemed to give Alec second thoughts but not entirely intimidate him. A moment later the peas dropped all over Alec's lap because Riley had jostled his elbow, grinning wickedly. Quiet but sneaky, that was Riley, Kiara decided.
Sweet too. She still couldn't quite believe he'd just sat there for two hours, eventually falling asleep himself, just so he wouldn't disturb her while she napped. When she'd asked him about it earlier, he'd just kind of shrugged sheepishly and mumbled something about her being too cute to move, before quickly hurrying away to work on his contribution to dinner.
At the end of the meal she helped clear the table, but was quickly sent to sit down again because it was "Alec's turn" to do dishes. Kiara thought it made sense for them all to take turns when they had just been a bachelor herd, but she was still a little confused when they didn't let her just take over the chore now. Shouldn't they want her to?
She also didn't feel like she was pulling her weight.
"You're our guest, you are not going to do chores," Dorian said, so firmly that she had to bite her lip against replying 'yes, daddy.' Her body was all kinds of riled up and her doe wasn't helping, but she hadn't completely lost her mind. Yet.
The other three taught her how to play poker while Alec did the dishes before joining them. Kiara had heard of the game before, but had never played it, and she enjoyed it even though she was terrible at it. Just like over dinner, the men were silly and fun, mocking each other, affectionately competing, and calling each other names. They didn't call her any names, but they still teased her about her easy-to-read expressions when she had a really good or bad hand.
When she tried to pout, to pretend she had a bad hand instead of a 'full house' as they'd called it, Gavin burst out laughing.
"That is the fakest pout I've ever seen," he said, reaching out to poke at her lower lip. Squealing, Kiara smacked his hand away instinctively—and then froze, deer-in-the-headlights. But he didn't yell or get angry, he was still laughing as he leaned back, and the icy sensation of terror quickly trickled away. The others were chuckling too, Riley staring at his cards, Alec looking at Gavin... Kiara focused on her cards and tried to ignore Dorian's intent stare as he studied her, seeing far more than she wanted him to.
******
A knock had Kiara looking up to see Gavin standing in her doorway, rapping his knuckles against the frame. She was sitting up in her bed, a laptop in front of her so she could check her emails and try to catch up on her work before going to sleep. Thankfully she hadn't missed any deadlines while she was ill, but she was going to have to work her tail off to make the upcoming ones, and she definitely couldn't afford to lose any money now.
"Hey," he said, giving her what was probably his most charming grin. Kiara melted a little bit under the force of it and she could hear her doe practically purring in her head. Her doe had definitely never purred before. Was that an effect of the jaguar genes or just her doe's obvious interest in the four Walker stags? "Can I come in?"
After a moment of shocked surprise that he was asking, Kiara belatedly nodded her head. "Yes, of course."
He sauntered in and sat down on her bed, only a few feet away from her, with his legs off of the side but his upper body turned towards her. Reaching out with his hand, he leaned back into a comfortable position. Kiara felt a hot flush between her legs as her tummy started to flutter.
Whenever any of the men were around her, it was so hard to remember all the reasons she had for not becoming attached to them.
"I just wanted to apologize again for running out the way I did this afternoon," he said seriously, his dark brown eyes almost soulful. "I definitely didn't mean to make you think I was upset with you. You're amazing. I was upset on your behalf, but when it comes to you, I'm ju
st in awe. You're so brave and you've been through so much, and yet you're still incredibly sweet and kind."
These men sure knew how to make her blush. She didn't think she'd been so pink since the first romance book she'd read for her job. Kiara didn't really know how to respond. She certainly didn't feel brave. Desperation had driven her when she'd run away. Could running away really be called brave?
"You don't have to apologize," she said, running her hands over the sheets covering her lap. "I'm just a guest here, you all have been wonderful about keeping me entertained, but if you needed a minute to yourself... I mean... it's fine, of course. No apology necessary." Good, now she was repeating herself as she babbled. Her blush ran hotter, this time from embarrassment as Gavin grinned at her.
"Well I did anyway, now say 'apology accepted, Gavin.'"
"Apology accepted, Gavin," she parroted obediently, a smile lifting her lips in amusement.
"Good. Now, I think we should kiss and make up," he said, scooting closer as Kiara's heart began to pound. Wide eyed, she stared at him, breathless... waiting. Some part of her felt cynical, sure he was going to push to have sex with her now, but he just lowered his lips to hers and kissed her.
Gently.
Sweetly.
Like he was cherishing the feel of his lips against hers. Like all he wanted to do was kiss her. Just like with Alec earlier. Kiara moaned, leaning into the kiss, wanting more, just like she had with Alec. Her doe purred with approval, urging Kiara onward.
When Gavin started to pull back, Kiara clung to him, only then realizing that her hands had moved up to his chest, her fingers holding on to his shirt. His dark eyes were hot, lustful... but he was gently reaching up to pluck her hands away.
"Kiara..." He rasped her name, his voice husky as his fingers slid between hers. He'd removed her hands from his chest but didn't seem quite able to let her go. Kiara knew how he felt. "I didn't come in here for... I don't want you to think I'm just interested in you for..." His voice kept trailing off.