Joe winced when I mentioned the red dress whore but his face took on a whole other expression when I mentioned his new girlfriend from the hospital.
“What the hell are you on about Ella? What brunette at the hospital?”
“The girl with Max, your new girlfriend.” He was looking at me now like I was sprouting horns or something, his face shocked and slightly confused.
“There is no new girlfriend, there never has been anyone else Ella. Where the hell did you get an idea like that from?”
“I saw her in the waiting room, don’t lie. Max was holding her hand and comforting her and she was crying. Are you really going through them that quickly these days that you’re forgetting which one is which?”
“I honestly have no idea what’s going on here Ella, I’m ringing Max. This is insane.”
I stood tapping my toe trying to appear aloof and indifferent, but I was intrigued to hear what Max would say.
“Hey Max…yes she’s here now…No, listen I need to ask you about the morning of the accident. Were you with anyone at the hospital?...okay hold on…” Joe took the phone away from his ear, “he said he was on his own.”
“So who was the girl he was sitting next to holding hands with when I came to the door? The brunette crying her eyes out?” I was getting antsy standing here.
“Did you get that Max? ... Oh shit…” Joe’s eyes went as wide as saucers as he looked over at me and shook his head again in despair. “Fuck…yeah I’ll call you tomorrow. Thanks buddy.” He hung up and sat down on our step, his head in his hands.
“The girl you saw was on her own, she’d just lost her Father and was crying in the family waiting room. Max was comforting her because he saw she had no family there to help her…My God Ella, all this time you thought there was someone else. Was that why you never called?”
I suddenly felt a huge wave of relief wash over me followed by indignation at his last comment.
“Why should I have to call? I haven’t done anything wrong! I wasn’t the one sticking my tongue down some whore’s throat last time we were in the same room together. You were disgusting that night by the way. I’d never do something like that in front of you.” I felt the anger from that night resurface and I fought back the urge to slap him across the face for being so utterly heartless.
He ran his hands through his hair groaning.
“I know I was a complete ass hole that night and I’m sorry, I’ve hated myself for it every fucking day since. She was disgusting Ella, and so was I. Kissing her was like kissing a bloody octopus, and it felt wrong. I shouldn’t have done that to you. I know that saying this won’t make what I did any more bearable for you but I was jealous Ella. I was jealous of you and Max, the relationship you had. I’ve always known he loved you and the fact he could be with you whenever he wanted and I couldn’t pissed me off. I guess in some twisted way I wanted to hurt you like I was hurting.”
Was he for real?
“I don’t love Max, not like that. Why is it my fault that Max feels that way? I never encouraged him, I’ve always been exactly the same with him whether you and I been together or not.”
He glared up at me with hatred in his eyes.
“You still kissed him though didn’t you.”
“No! He kissed me! There’s a big difference. He lent forward to kiss me and I pulled away as soon as I saw what was about to happen. End of.”
“Doesn’t matter, it still pissed me off.”
I was getting pissed off myself now.
“Good! Now you know how I felt every time Anna was around you.”
He stood up now, towering over me in anger.
“I never had feelings for Anna ever, you know that. I’m not a cheat Ella.”
“No you just love em and leave em don’t you Joe. So how many more nights out have you had with your great pal Charlie huh? He sure knows how to pull in a classy crowd doesn’t he! What was it red dress slut said to me in the ladies? Ah yes, she was going to suck and fuck you so dirty and hard you’d never want to let her go. Well I hope you got your money’s worth.”
My head felt like it was about to explode I was fuming right now.
“Jesus Christ woman, will you just stop for one minute and listen? I didn’t touch her, I was playing a stupid dangerous game and it fucking back fired big time, it all blew up in my face okay! I haven’t cheated on you ever. I haven’t been anywhere near another woman since I met you Ella, I haven’t wanted to.
“Apart from that red dressed hoe.” I spat out.
“Fuck! Are you going to hold that night over my head forever?”
“Probably.” I muttered childishly.
“Look, I didn’t come here to fight with you Ella.”
“Why did you come here then Joe?”
He sat back down and looked up at me with pleading eyes.
“When you came to the hospital that day to see me after the accident, was it as a concerned friend or do you still have feelings for me?”
No way, I wasn’t going to be the one to put myself out there.
“How about you answer my question first. Why are you here?”
He shook his head and looked down at the ground, his hands laced together between his knees.
“Okay, I got a call from Max today telling me you had a date with some guy who in Max’s words was… ‘hot’.” He looked up into my eyes now. “I didn’t like it.”
“So you came all the way over here to tell me of your disapproval. Okay noted. Thanks. Is that all?” I was acting like a spoilt brat but I didn’t care.
“No, fuck Ella that’s not all. I miss you, I miss us. I still reach out for you every morning to hold you in bed, but you aren’t there and I fucking hate it. I love you so god damn much it’s destroying me not being with you. I’m still yours if you’ll have me. I want you to be mine Ella. The thought of another guy taking you out, holding you, kissing you, it’s killing me.”
My heart was melting but I couldn’t give in so easily.
“You’ve been acting like an asshole lately, you’re the one who drove me away.”
“I gave you space, you said you wanted space. I was in a panic I didn’t know what to do. I kept fucking things up every time I saw you.”
“Sucking face with another girl in front of me will do that…” I was back into bitch mode again.
“Jesus, that right there is the biggest regret of my life. That and losing you.”
“I think you’ve got more to regret than that surely. What about the thousands of women you’ve fucked across the pond Joe. No regrets there then?”
“You’re right, my life has been one long fuck up and I can’t change that, but I can try my damn hardest to change what’s been happening between you and me. I’m here to fight for you Ella. To show you I love you, to tell you what you mean to me.”
“Fine… show me… tell me. Do whatever it is you came here to do. I’m all ears Joe.”
I crossed my arms over my chest again ready to defend my weakening heart.
“I don’t want to live through another day feeling like this. Since you left there’s been this pain in my chest and it never goes away. I can’t function without you Ella. All the money, the cars, the business, it’s nothing to me. You Ella, you’re everything. You give my life purpose, you make me want to be a better man for you, to love you and care for you. I want to share everything with you; my successes, my failures, my hopes and dreams and my fears, my future my life. I want to laugh with you when you’re happy and hold you when you’re down.”
He reached out to hold my hand and I let him.
“I don’t want to end up a lonely bitter old man like my Father because I was too selfish and stubborn to put myself out there and tell you how much you mean to me. You come first Ella, always. You’re my first thought when I wake and the image I see in my mind when I finally fall asleep at night. If you don’t want to be with me then I’ll have to find a way to accept it, but I needed to come here tonight because I can’t go o
n like this anymore.”
He stood opposite me, gently holding my hand and looking into my eyes. I took a deep breath to gather my thoughts before I spoke.
“Everything about my date tonight felt off, wrong. When he held my hand or put his arms around my waist I froze…”
I could see Joe tense his jaw but he didn’t speak.
“…It didn’t feel right, to have him touch me like that. He wasn’t you. It made me realise I was trying to move on and I didn’t want to. I do still love you Joe. I don’t want anyone else. It’s always been you.”
Joe let out a huge breath and pulled me into his chest. His face buried in my neck breathing me in as I put my arms around him and snuggled into him. It felt so right. He was my home, my safe place, my life.
“If we’re gonna make this work Ella we need to draw a line under all the shit from my past. I wish I could change it baby, honestly I do, but I can’t. We both need to move away from it and focus on what we have together and our future, okay?”
I nodded against him, not wanting to release contact yet.
“Do you promise me you’ll try? If it helps we can try counselling. I’d do anything to make you happy Ella.”
He put both of his hands on either side of my face and made me look up at him.
“I waited a long time for you Ella. I don’t ever want to let you go again.”
I looked up into his sparkling grey eyes.
“I don’t want to let you go either. You’re mine.”
26
Being back in Joe’s arms again after being alone for so long felt like heaven. I wanted to get lost in him. He lent down to kiss me gently but I pulled him harder into me and deepened the kiss, loving the familiar feel of his tongue and the delicious taste of him. His hard body pressed up against mine. I was wet for him and we’d hardly touched each other.
“I don’t think the neighbours would appreciate the show we’re putting on right now.” I said looking up at him through my eye lashes.
“Oh I don’t know, they might do…” He winked.
I grabbed his hand and led him to the front door. As I struggled to get my key into the lock he held me close, my back to his front and kissed along my neck and down to my shoulder and I leant into him needing more, closer.
We fell into the living room and he slammed the door shut with his leg before picking me up and carrying me over to the stairs, his kisses becoming more urgent and my frantic need for him growing and pulsing in between my legs. He lay me down on the steps and stroked my face tenderly. I pushed him back to break the kiss.
“I don’t want you to make love to me Joe, not yet.”
He looked heartbroken, he so wasn’t getting where I was going with this, so I had to put him out of his misery.
“I want you to fuck me, any way you want as hard as you can.”
He put his forehead against mine panting with lust.
“It’s what we both need.” I added.
“Where did you come from?” He looked at me wistfully, “You have the face of an angel and a body made for sin. You were made for me.”
He stood up from the stairs and picked me up in his arms, to carry me up to my bedroom. Once we were up there he closed and locked the door and grabbed my face to kiss me with so much force I was breathless.
He spun me round and bent me over the chest of drawers then lifted my dress to expose my knickers. He squeezed my ass hard and slapped it making me gasp loudly.
“I’ve missed this. I fucking love your ass.” He growled kneading and massaging it before he peeled my knickers down slowly and kneeled behind me. Then his mouth was on me, his tongue swirling around my clit and along my pussy making me whimper and push back onto him. He used his hands to rub my ass cheeks, and open me up for him, then he sucked my clit into his mouth making the pulse and burn grow to the most intense throbbing. I was delirious, holding onto the drawers for support and crying out with each suck and lick. God I’d missed his talented mouth and tongue. I started to shiver and build to a climax that I knew would be strong. It had been so long since we’d been together, everything was going to be intensified right now.
“Come on my face Ella, fuck my face.” He said pressing harder and teasing my orgasm out of me. “I want to feel you come on my tongue baby.”
I couldn’t hold back, the orgasm tore through my body making me buck into him and cry out. “So fucking good, oh Joe it’s too fucking good.”
“I know baby.” He lapped at me, keeping the orgasm going forever as I started to feel my legs wobble and my arms go weak. Then I was swept up and thrown face down onto the bed. My dress ripped off over my head and my hips pulled backwards so I was on all fours.
“Hold on tight baby, it’s gonna be hard and fast.” He gasped out as I heard his hoodie drop to the floor and the zip of his jeans come down. I felt him rub his cock along my pussy and then he surged forward with such force I screamed out. The stretch of him filling me felt fucking amazing, I’d missed the way his cock massaged my walls and swirled inside me turning me into a mess of nerves sparking and erupting in pleasure.
“It’s been too long.” I cried. “I’ve missed feeling you inside me.” I gasped as he pounded into me so hard I had to hold onto the head board for support as it banged against the wall. Thank God Robyn was out right now.
“That’s because… my cock belongs… inside you Ella. It was made… for you.” He said on each deliciously hard thrust.
“I fucking love it.” I said reaching back with one hand to feel his balls and stroke him, I was desperate to touch any part of him in any way I could.
He held onto my hips as he rocked hard into me then ran one hand up and down my back as he cried out. “This is mine…you…are…mine.”
“All yours Joe, to fuck any way you want.” I turned to glance at him as he reared up fucking me senseless from behind.
Then he held me around the waist and turned us so he was leaning with his back against the headboard and pillows and I was on top of him.
“Ride my cock Ella, ride me so I can watch your ass while you make me come.”
I rode him hard, bouncing up and down on his cock and holding onto his legs as he massaged my ass and watched himself going in and out of my pussy. My back was to him but I turned my head to show him how turned on I was. I loved seeing how helpless and desperate he looked with me fucking him this way. The love in his eyes was undeniable and it turned me on even more.
“More.” He said as he started to thrust up into me to create more friction and speed up the pace. Then he reached forward and pulled me back against his chest, my back to his front. He thrust up into me hitting my inner front walls, one arm around my chest massaging my tits and playing with my nipples as the other hand found its way down to my clit to tease and play with me there. My senses were in over load right now. If I thought I’d come hard before it was nothing compared to what was building right now. All I could do was hold onto his arm and reach back to hold him around his neck with my other hand. I was lost to the moment, to him.
“I’m gonna come Ella, come with me.” He gasped.
“Yes.” I managed to reply in between pants, then we were there, my pussy contracting and squeezing his growing pulsing cock, my clit throbbing under his fingers insanely sensitive as he swirled and rubbed me into oblivion and his come spurting hot up into me. It went on and on, I never wanted it to stop. This moment with him was the ultimate. I couldn’t be more his if I tried. I loved this man with all my body, heart and soul. I’d never let him go again. I’d fight anyone who tried to take him away. He was mine I was his.
Finally we both slumped back in exhaustion.
“Fucking hell that was…I can’t even speak Ella.”
“Me neither… I love you.”
I turned my face to look at him.
“I love you too, more than anything.”
I ran my hand down his cheek and gave him a slow gentle kiss on the lips. Before I knew what was what we’d both fell into an exh
austed sleep, his cock still inside me and my hand on his face.
27
I woke a few hours later to delicate kisses on my neck and the heavenly feel of Joe’s body balanced over the top of mine. As I stirred and moved my arms to wind them around his neck and stroke the back of his hair he slipped his cock inside me making me sigh and groan in pleasure.
“Wake me up like this every day please.” I sighed and he laughed as he nibbled along my neck and rocked gently into me. The change of pace and the increased intimacy made my heart hurt with the amount of love I felt in that moment. I clung to him as he used one hand to squeeze and massage my right thigh and ass, then he asked me to wrap my legs around him and I did. I tilted my hips up to take more of him inside me and build the friction between us. He was right, we did belong together. It felt like we were jigsaw puzzle pieces that had finally fitted, two into one and made a perfect whole.
He took my hands in his as he rocked harder into me, moving my body up the bed, and he held our entwined hands above our heads as he continued to kiss me, his lips soft but firm, their pace matching our hips.
“You’re mine, all mine and only ever mine.” He panted into my neck. “And I’m yours Ella, forever.”
I wanted to cry, my emotions were so raw and alive. My body lit up and at his mercy.
“It’s only ever been you Joe…You’re all I want.” I closed my eyes and let my head fall back as the waves of pleasure washed over me.
“Look at me.” He urged with his forehead close to mine, and I did. Our eyes locked together engulfing us in a bubble of seduction and lust that was our world right now. Nothing else mattered other than the connection we felt with each other, with our minds, our emotions and our bodies. We gasped into each other, as if our breath fed the other. Our hips moving faster to bring each other to that pinnacle we knew we could reach so effortlessly together.
Joe moved one arm down to wrap around my waist and lift my hips higher into him, his other arm holding both of my hands still above my head. Neither one of us could speak we were so lost to the movements and the feelings. Our words were spoken through our eyes, our panting into each other. We said all we needed to without a single word. I knew as well as he did that this night was the beginning of us, a new stronger us, a beginning with no end.
Forever Yours Page 13