But it was Lord Havelock he saw first. He was hovering over the back of a sofa upon which his wife was sitting, deep in conversation with Lady Chepstow. Chepstow himself was sitting on the floor, for goodness sake, gazing up at the woman he’d snatched from her employers during a Christmas house party and subsequently married, with a fatuous expression on his face.
‘Would you care for some wine, sir?’ Yet another smartly dressed footman stepped forward, a tray of glasses held in his hand. Edmund took just one. And congratulated himself on his self-control.
‘You will find a cold collation laid out upon the pianoforte, my lord,’ said the footman, waving to a second room, visible through a set of double doors which stood open.
‘The pianoforte,’ he repeated, eyeing the instrument over which a cloth had been draped ‘Of course.’
‘Her ladyship is quite determined that there is to be no dancing tonight,’ said the footman, with just a trace of a smile tugging at his lips. ‘Though you will find card tables, should you prefer to play, rather than merely converse with the other guests.’
Edmund would never prefer wasting his time in a trivial game when he could be conversing with someone of interest. However, it was not the footman’s fault that he was serving refreshments at the kind of gathering where gentlemen sat on the floor gazing up at their wives and pianos were put into service as tea tables.
So he nodded his acceptance of the boundaries set for the evening’s ‘entertainment’ and stepped fully into the room.
And then he saw her. And something that felt rather like cold rage started burning in his gut. Because she looked...he swallowed. If it had been any other woman, he would have said she looked stunning. Luscious. Her hair was different. She’d had it cut and styled so that wisps curled round her face. But it was her gown that really stunned him. What little there was of it.
Not only did it plunge low at the front, but the tiny little scraps of material masquerading as sleeves did not even cover her shoulders. It made the whole top half of her gown look as though, at any moment, it might slip from her altogether, revealing the figure to which it was clinging so precariously.
To every man in the room.
For a few moments he stood completely still, grappling with the urge to whip off his jacket, march across the room, and fling it round her shoulders. How could she...flaunt herself in that...tawdry excuse for a gown? After saying she couldn’t bear the thought of men...pawing her, that the only kind of marriage she could tolerate would be a platonic one, she was standing there with everything on display, practically begging every man in the room to...lean in and grab a handful.
He downed his drink in one go and slammed the empty glass down on the nearest horizontal surface. Hang offering her his coat to cover herself up. He was going to give her a piece of his mind.
Chapter Six
If this was what tonnish people called a ‘small, informal gathering’, then Georgiana shuddered to think what a large one would be like. Since she’d been here, more than fifty couples had wandered in, shaken hands with Lord Havelock, been presented to his wife, taken a glass of wine and ambled out again. They had included a baronet, a viscount and a marquis.
Stepmama had been disappointed in the viscount, since he’d brought a wife with him. But when she’d seen the marquis come in alone and learned he was as yet unmarried, she’d been so excited it was a wonder she hadn’t danced a jig on the spot.
Georgiana had cringed at Stepmama’s attempts to attract his notice and push him in Sukey’s direction, and then winced at Lord Lensborough’s distinctly frosty dismissal.
Her one consolation was that Sukey hadn’t flung herself at him. Far from it. She’d made a beeline for Mrs Pargetter’s daughters, Dotty and Lotty, and stayed glued to them, whether they strolled to the end of the room to select a plate of refreshments, or sat on a sofa to giggle and gossip. Georgiana had no interest in their sort of chatter, and anyway, the sofa on which they’d eventually settled could only just contain the three of them. So she’d made the excuse of needing to visit the retiring room and slipped away from them all.
She’d stayed there as long as she could. It had been so horrid, being in a room full of people who all knew each other, and who had all quickly pegged Stepmama for the kind of woman who would stop at nothing to see her daughters married off.
If only she wouldn’t be so...obvious.
Eventually, Georgiana knew she could not stay in the retiring room any longer, or Stepmama would be sending someone to find out if she’d fallen ill. She looked warily round the huge reception room before stepping fully back inside, looking for the safest place to go. In her absence, Stepmama had gone to the card tables, where she was currently frowning over what looked like a hand of whist with Mr Pargetter. The poor man had, earlier on, looked as out of place as Georgiana had felt, amidst all the titled, privileged guests. It was good to see he looked much more at ease, now he was playing cards. And being much more useful, to Georgiana’s way of thinking, by keeping Stepmama occupied.
She gave a sigh of relief, fixed a smile on her face and sauntered in the general direction of Sukey’s sofa. As soon as Stepmama had noticed her, nodded her approval and returned her attention to her hand, Georgiana veered off towards the furthest, quietest corner of the room. She had just turned and leaned back against the wall, when the footman stationed at the door announced the arrival of yet another guest.
‘Lord Ashenden!’
For a moment, a wave of such raw fury gripped her that she forgot to breathe. And it wasn’t just because of the way he’d rebuffed her proposal. It was all the years and years of rejection that had come before. Which brought on a wave of pain so intense it made her throat close up.
And then she went light-headed.
Then the fear of fainting away and humiliating herself in front of all these sophisticated people, just because Edmund had walked in, got her breathing again. And firming her knees and her spine. And schooling her features into an expression of what she hoped would pass for indifference.
She was only just in time, too. He’d been looking idly round the room, but his cool grey gaze snagged on her in recognition. And then, as if it wasn’t enough that he was actually here, his lip curled in distaste as he raked her from head to toe.
He couldn’t have hurt her worse if he’d slapped her. Come to think of it, he couldn’t have hurt her at all if he’d tried anything like that. She’d have had her guard up and deflected the blow.
A reflection that served to turn the knife in the wound. For he’d been the one to teach her how to defend herself, and, remembering how close they’d been once only made her more painfully aware of how far apart they were now.
Oh, Lord, why did he have to be here tonight, when she was wearing a gown that made her feel like a...a trollop?
Trollop. The accusation rang in her ears. It had been Edmund’s housekeeper who’d first used that word to condemn her behaviour, when she’d found her in his sickroom, that day she’d spent collecting all those butterflies to cheer him up. Which had been the last time she’d ever managed to sneak into his house. Nobody else had ever called her that name again, but whenever she’d heard anyone else called a trollop, in connection with some scandalous behaviour, it had felt as though they were raking their nails across her skin.
Now, the way he was looking at her made her wonder if he’d thought it all along.
She gasped.
Was that why he hadn’t written to her, even though he’d said he would? Had someone persuaded him, between their exchange of notes and his arrival in the Scilly Isles, that he’d do better to cut the connection? She’d always just thought he’d forgotten all about her once he’d left the country, that he had found more interesting companions, but...it might explain everything. It would certainly explain the way he’d behaved when he’d come home. Instead of going st
raight to their usual meeting place by the stream, or tucking a note between the loose stones by his gate post to explain why he wasn’t coming, he’d completely ignored her.
Stepmama had explained that she shouldn’t expect him to recognise her in public, once his father had died, and he’d become the Earl. Besides which, he wasn’t a boy any longer, but a man who’d travelled and gained all sorts of experience. She’d taken another, longer look at him then. And seen that this fashionably dressed, sophisticated man would have regarded the letters she’d written to him as the outpourings of a childish idiot.
She’d gone cold inside as she’d finally understood how pathetic she’d been about...so many things. And promptly vowed not to be so pitiful one moment longer. If he didn’t want to have anything to do with her, then she would not embarrass him, or herself, by letting anyone suspect she’d been pining for him.
So the next time she’d seen him, the night he’d strolled into the local assembly in Bartlesham, she’d fixed a smile on her face and stuck close to Sukey and her throng of admirers. And instead of ignoring the leftover ones that Sukey didn’t have time to dance with, she’d offered to stand up with them for once. Most of them were so bemused they couldn’t think of a polite way to refuse her, so, for that one night, Georgiana had never lacked for a partner.
But it hadn’t impressed Edmund. At least, not the way she’d hoped. He’d looked at her exactly the way he was looking at her now. As though she disgusted him.
So she did exactly what she’d done that night as well. She lifted her chin and turned her head away, as though there was something more interesting to look at elsewhere. Her gaze came to rest on the baronet, who was standing by the piano, piling his plate with food. And slipping every third sandwich into his pocket.
The sight of a guest stealing food was so shocking that it did actually distract her from Edmund. For a moment, anyway. By the time she glanced back at the place where he had been standing, he was no longer there.
Instead, he was striding across the room, looking as though he was thinking of strangling her.
Her heart started banging against her ribs. She didn’t know what she’d done to put such a look on his face, but at least he was coming over. Every other time they’d been at the same function he’d made a point of ignoring her. Spoken to just about every other person in the place, but accorded her only a chilly nod as he’d stalked past on his way out.
Not that he had any right to look at her like that. In fact, she had far more right to be angry and to be shooting dagger glances at him. If he’d only been more...reasonable, she might not have had to part with Whitesocks, or see Stepmama spend the money that had been left to her by her father on foolish extravagances, or been shoehorned into ridiculous outfits and obliged to put up with the unwelcome attention such gowns attracted from men who ought to have better manners. She might not have had to come to London at all.
By the time he reached her side, she’d curled her hands into fists, she was so angry with him. Every bit as angry as he looked. For a moment or two, neither of them spoke. Instead they just stood there glaring at each other.
‘I see you are set on taking London by storm,’ he said, giving the edge of her décolletage one scathing glance.
He might have said something vile, but at least he had been the one to weaken and speak first. So it felt as if she had scored the first point.
‘I see you have left your manners behind in Bartlesham,’ she riposted.
‘Touché,’ he said, raising his hand to acknowledge the hit. Which made it two to one. ‘But if you want me to make a complimentary remark about your appearance, I am afraid you will be waiting a long time.’
She supposed he’d meant to wound her, but since he couldn’t possibly hate the gown more than she did, the thrust had gone wide. What was more, now that he’d spoken to her so rudely, she felt perfectly justified in speaking her mind as well.
‘I have already learned that waiting for you is a waste of time.’
‘I attended you at the trout stream the very day I got your note,’ he said, looking a touch uncomfortable. ‘And I did call upon you a day or so later, to tell you that...’ He shook his head. ‘Never mind that now. It must be obvious that by the time I had calmed down, you had already left for London and what might have been said upon that occasion is now completely irrelevant.’
‘You called upon me? At Six Chimneys?’ That hadn’t been what she’d meant about waiting for him. It had been the years while he’d been abroad, during which she’d pined for his company, which she now regarded as so much wasted time. Because she’d always hoped that when he came back, things would have returned to the way they’d been...
Which just went to show how silly she’d been. They’d both been children when he’d gone away. Adults when he returned. Things could never have been the same between them, even if he’d kept his word about staying in touch.
‘Yes,’ he said looking grim. ‘I had the dubious pleasure of meeting your father’s cousin, Mr Wickford.’
‘Serves you right,’ she said, as if she was twelve again. ‘Did you also meet Mrs Wickford?’
‘No. She was upstairs, attempting to make herself presentable.’
‘You had a narrow escape. Though a meeting with Mrs Wickford is exactly what you deserve for—’ She pulled herself up short. For a moment, there, she’d started speaking to him as freely as she’d done when they’d been children. As if she hadn’t worked so hard to acquire the manners of a lady. As if all the slights and betrayals had never taken place.
But they had. Besides, he was the Earl of Ashenden now, not her playmate. And she was just a penniless country miss, who ought to know her place and respect her betters, and all the rest of the things Stepmama was constantly reminding her of.
‘For letting you down,’ he finished her sentence for her, the way he’d always done when her thoughts had become too tangled for her to get them out sensibly. ‘For which I apologise. I told you, once, that you might apply to me should you ever find yourself in need of my help—’
She gasped. She’d thought he’d resented making that promise. That he would do anything to wriggle out of it. And yet now that he’d had time to reflect, it seemed he regretted not being able to do the one thing she’d requested. As though keeping his word was still important to him.
Even if she wasn’t.
‘And the very first time you asked me for anything,’ he was continuing, ‘I let you down. Not,’ he went on hastily, ‘that I have any intention of acceding to your ridiculous proposal of marriage.’
‘Naturally not.’ It had always been a long shot. Her last, desperate attempt to salvage something from the wreckage left in the wake of her father’s demise.
But did he have to look so relieved she’d now said as much?
‘But there are other ways I could keep my promise to...to be your friend, I am sure. Other ways I can repay the debt I owe you.’
‘Debt? What debt?’
‘Perhaps you are right. Perhaps it is not that I owe you anything.’ He paused, frowning slightly, the way he always did when marshalling his arguments. ‘Perhaps it is more accurate to say that I am determined not to break my vow.’
She flinched. Just as she’d thought. It wasn’t she that mattered, but his own honour.
‘Yes, well,’ she said, ‘it is a little late now.’
‘Far from it. There is a great deal I can do, short of actually marrying you.’
Did he have to keep on reminding her that he had no intention of marrying her? He’d made it plain enough already. She wasn’t stupid!
‘There is nothing you can do now,’ she hissed like a kettle coming to the boil, ‘that will make anything right. You cannot get back Whitesocks.’ She poked him in the chest with her forefinger. ‘Or my dowry.’ She poked him again. ‘Or my home.’ He grabbed her
hand before she managed to get a third dig into his chest, so that for a moment, anyone looking at them would have thought they were holding hands.
‘Your dowry is gone?’ Something flickered across his face. ‘That is how she could afford the court presentation, I suppose.’
Edmund always had been quick on the uptake. Her father might have despised him for not being keen on what he’d deemed manly pursuits, but even he’d conceded Edmund had a mind like a steel trap. So, because he was sure to work it all out for himself eventually, she didn’t see any point in trying to conceal anything from him now. ‘Stepmama is determined Sukey will marry a viscount, at the very least. Which means we need to be able to dance at ton events. Hence the court presentation.’
She wrenched her hand free. ‘This entire Season has been planned out with the efficiency of a military campaign.’
His eyes flicked once more across the immense expanse of bosom left on show by her scanty evening gown. ‘So,’ he said thoughtfully, ‘rather than don armour, you have decided to use what weapons you possess.’
‘I would say that it is more a case of setting out the wares,’ she countered through gritted teeth. ‘I feel like a...’ She sucked in a sharp breath. She could only think of one horrid, vulgar word to describe how she felt.
‘You look magnificent,’ he said.
‘What? That wasn’t what you said when you first came over here.’ She searched his face for signs of mockery, but could detect only what looked very much like sympathy.
‘I...’ He paused, his lips thinning in annoyance. ‘I forgot, when I first saw you tonight, that you have little choice in what you wear,’ he admitted. ‘This is one of the things you were dreading about the Season, wasn’t it? Being paraded about like a prize heifer at market.’
Bother him, now he’d made her want to cry. Because he’d remembered what she’d said to him, practically word for word. And believed her, unquestioningly.
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