I hovered near her but did nothing. Her mouth progressed, her pink tongue licked at my bottom lip, and she moaned. I was on fire. The desire was an inferno, out of control, a yearning for more. I buried my hand in her hair and tugged her head back. Her face radiated lust.
“You sure about this?” I growled, waiting for her response.
“I’ve waited a long time.”
With those words, I lost all my resolve. “Fuck it.” I closed the space between us, and my mouth overtook hers. The kiss was deep, needy. I was hungry. My hands swept over her back and pulled her in close. Her chest pressed against mine, and I lost my inner battle to go gentle on her. I pushed her against the wall, my mouth sucking on her pulse point as her hands groped my back.
Her mouth made sweet sounds, and my dick was so fucking hard, I was sure it’d pop my zipper. I clasped her wrists and drew her arms off me. My body pulled away from hers, and I studied the way her cheeks were flushed.
“Why’d you stop?” she pouted.
My eyes took her in from head to toe. “Take off your clothes.”
A half chuckle tried to make its way out of her throat but she stopped it when she saw my unyielding expression. “Here?”
“Do you want me to fuck you, Hilary?”
“Yes, dammit,” she growled.
“Then take off your clothes.”
Her breath shuddered as she nodded. Her fumbling hands unsnapped her jeans, and she removed each heeled boot before removing the denim. A tangle of black lace skimmed down her long, creamy legs next until all she had on was her shirt. She slowly popped open a button at a time, and when she parted the material, a nude bra covered the perfectly shaped tits I’d wanted to see since…I couldn’t remember. Okay, I could if my dick weren’t overtaking my brain.
She licked her lips as her fingers played over the clasp at the front of her lingerie. I reached over, drew her hands away, unhooked the bra in an instant, and let it fall down her arms. My hands rested on each side of her pert breasts, my thumbs playing with her nipples. Her head lolled back, and little moans escaped her mouth. She rested her head against the wall and arched into me.
“That feel good?” I asked, squeezing and then skimming my hands down her body. “As perfect as I thought you’d be,” I whispered to myself.
My lips made contact with her skin, and I kissed my way from sternum to belly. She was shaking, her breathing heavy as I kneeled in front of her, my hands resting on her hips. There was no vulnerability in her gaze, only wonder and curiosity. She seemed certain of this decision that could wreak havoc. I wanted to push away, stop the stupidity of our actions, but spreading her legs before me dispelled all my hesitation.
I faced the most intimate part of her and smelled her arousal. My tongue dove inside, as my hands tugged her closer and she sustained her balance against the wall. She hitched her leg up onto my shoulder, and her fingers dug into my hair, urging me to go deeper. She tasted so good, like heaven and rainbows and whatever other shit that made the world a fucking magical place. And those moans that escaped her mouth were for me and me alone.
She was almost there, but I backed away, and a gasp released from her throat. “Zach, I was ready,” she grumbled.
Hearing her say my name almost made me continue, but I stood and tugged her forward, taking her mouth instead. I let her taste herself on my tongue as it tangled with hers. I couldn’t treat her like any other woman, fucking her fast to satiate a need then walking away. No, I would treat her like a queen. I’d draw out every second I could before she broke into a million pieces. Even in a drunken haze, she’d remember tonight, if not in mind, at least in body. She pulled back and reached for my shirt, ready to rip it off. I pushed her hands away and snapped at her, “Not yet. Bedroom.” The harshness of my tone couldn’t be controlled, she had me undone.
She swayed her hips as she led the way with assurance, making me crazy with lust. She sat on the edge of the bed, crossed her legs, and leaned back, her weight on her palms. “You’ve got me hot, bothered, and completely displayed, Zachary. I trust you’ll let me do the same to you?”
I stood in front of her, looking down at the determined woman who made me senseless. She reached for the belt on my jeans, but I held her wrist until she saw me. “Lay back and spread your legs.”
Her eyes widened as she did as she was told, despite the slight defiance burning brightly in her eyes. That made my dick ache even more, and I could feel myself grasping for control. I hooked my hands under her knees and yanked her forward, pulling her round ass to the edge of the bed and splaying her wide open for me to admire. Before she said a word, my mouth was on her again, my tongue licking up her slit, moving up and down and half circling around her clit.
She wanted me to take her over the edge. Not gonna happen yet, sweetheart, I thought as her moans echoed off the walls. I switched up my tempo, gliding my tongue over her clit and then flicking it, making her lose her mind as she tugged at my shoulders. I would find a rhythm, keep with it, and then switch. It introduced an element of surprise and would lead to the buildup of the perfect orgasm.
I made sure to be careful in my moves, tapping lightly with my tongue, barely touching the most sensitive part of her while stroking gently on other areas. I moved faster, but only a bit, not wanting to overstimulate. Her back arched, and her hands tangled in my hair—she was close to the breaking point. My tongue accelerated into harder motions, directly pressing on her clit. No more teasing, just continuous movements. It finally caused her to tighten, collapse, and cry out my name as her body thrummed in full-on pleasure. It was the most beautiful fucking thing I’d ever seen.
I pulled out several foil packets from my wallet. I had to get a hold of myself, or I’d blow my load the moment I entered her. Hilary sat up, her moves quick as she began to remove my jeans. I tugged at my sweater and stood before her. She stared at my dick as I stroked myself.
“Well, it’s true what they say about big feet and hands, then, Collins.” She smiled. “At least, in your case.” Before she could put her mouth on my dick, I sheathed myself, and we climbed farther onto the bed. I wouldn’t let her suck me off. Not tonight.
My body hovered over hers, and she reached down, guiding me to her entrance. I nudged and took my time before sinking into her. She was so wet, so damn tight; I knew it had been a long time since she’d been with anyone.
“God, you feel good.” I shuddered. Her long legs wrapped around my waist, and she pushed up against me.
“Go fast, don’t be gentle,” she growled in my ear and nipped my lobe. It caused a frenzy within me, and I began to thrust. My pace quickened, our bodies tuned in to one another like a symphony being conducted and performed in perfect time. Our rhythm was synchronized like a metronome.
Her breathing was labored, but she was quiet, no sound coming from her. I watched as her brow furrowed, her eyes open. Had nerves seeped through? Did she regret this? “Hey, you okay?”
She nodded, a slight whimper leaving her lips. When I bent down to kiss them, she clutched around me, her mouth spilling moans of pleasure as she pulsed around my dick. Her face was stunning as it fell. The base of my spine tightened, and my whole body went rigid as I pumped into her and saw violent flashes of light behind my closed eyes.
I groaned as everything I had spilled out of me. It was as if the emotions I’d locked away escaped, too. I hadn’t come that hard in my entire life, and the fact that this woman brought me to that was unexpected. My body was completely devoid of energy, and I dropped all my weight on top of her.
We caught our breath, then I slowly withdrew and laid beside her before I squished her to death. I quickly disposed of the condom in her wastebasket near the bed and sighed. I didn’t want to think about tomorrow. I was drowsy but felt a strange sense of comfort as her head rested on my shoulder.
“That was incredible,” she said softly, pressing a kiss on my chest.
It was. I said nothing though as my fingers tangled in her hair. We shifted to
get under her comforter. I kissed her forehead, and we drifted off to sleep, drunk on each other.
The morning came swiftly. Light spilled through the open curtains and smacked me in the face. I squinted and turned on my side, sinking my head into the pillow. My apartment was typically pitch black. Memories from the night before crashed through me. I opened my eyes and took in the beauty beside me. Her blond hair was splayed across the pillow, the waves like sunshine, sunflowers, and happiness. Her eyelashes fluttered. Her breathing was steady, and a soft smile played on her lips. I wondered if she was dreaming. A breast peeked out of the covers, and I wanted to touch her all over again, feel her silky skin against my rough, calloused hands. I wanted to sink into her as I had last night, this time with daylight raining over our bodies. However, regret was hot on my heels.
I quietly stood and tugged my jeans on. Hilary groaned, opened her eyes, and stretched. “Morning,” she croaked.
I couldn’t look at her as I picked up my sweater and pulled it over my head. I had to get out. The room was stifling, and I couldn’t breathe. I peeked through the window and saw that a blanket of snow covered the sidewalks. Hailing a cab would be difficult. I’d walk, run, leap to a bus stop, to the T, whatever transportation could get me away from her quickly before I devoured her again.
“Where are you going?”
I kneeled, lifted the bed skirt, searched for my left shoe, found it, then rummaged for my right one. I fumbled for what to tell this beautiful yet young creature that would inevitably be heartbroken by the actions of a complete shithead. I wasn’t a commitment guy. I just wasn’t. I kept reminding myself of that.
“Zach?” I shoved each shoe on. I heard the bed covers ruffle. “What is it?”
I finally looked at her and took in her mussed state from last night. Messy hair, swollen lips, sheet pooled at her waist. She was perfect, and my heart felt like it was ripping in two. I sat on the edge of the bed beside her, leaned forward, and clasping the back of her neck, gave her a deep kiss that I’d remember for the rest of my life.
“Hil, this can’t ever happen again.”
A tiny sound escaped from her mouth, and a look of sadness glazed her eyes. I moved away before I caught more of her disappointed expression. “But why?”
I paused at the doorway, half looking back, unable to face her fully. I wouldn’t leave if I did. “I’ll see you at Mom’s.”
Then, I walked out on her. I left her alone. I’d had the best sex of my life, and was letting her go because I was no fucking prince and I couldn’t save her. I was the dragon, and I would not only destroy her life but my family’s lives, as well.
Chapter Three
· zach ·
September 1996
School was boring, mostly because Evan was at home with a cold. I had to deal with an English quiz while he got an extra day to complete it. What a tool. At least my visit to the park across the street from our house was an interesting one today. Hilary asked me to take her after I picked her up from school. We usually walked together, and she always asked. Evan and I generally obliged, but today, it was just me. What made it interesting was that Nelly Larkin was sitting on one of the tables by herself. She invited me to sit with her as she did her Biology homework.
Hilary played with some other kids on the jungle gym, and laughter and screams filled the air. I stared at Nelly’s light brown hair as it draped her shoulders. She was cute, and she was a cheerleader. I told her about my tryouts for the football team next year.
“You think you’ll make the cut?” she asked, her green eyes speculating as she scanned my thin physique.
“I dunno. I really like basketball more.”
A cry grabbed our attention, and I noticed Hilary and a boy arguing over something in his hand. I ignored it and moved my eyes back to Nelly. “So, are you going to the Homecoming dance?”
She stared at Hilary as more shouting ensued. “That’s Evan’s sister, right?”
I glanced ahead again and saw some girls laughing at Hilary as a boy tugged on her braid and they continued to argue. “Yeah.”
“Aren’t you staying at his house?” she asked.
“Yeah, my parents moved.” Fuck them. They gave a shitload of money to Evan’s mom to help out with whatever I needed, but they didn’t care about me. It had been months since the Matthews family took me in, and my real family never even called to check on me. Not that they cared when I lived with them either. I was usually left on my own, wandering our big house. I found myself either in front of the television or reading the books my dad had in his office. Once he caught me reading his old copy of The Hobbit and had yelled at me not to touch his books. I did anyway, and even stole his rare edition of Fellowship of the Ring. It wasn’t like he was ever home to notice.
Three girls had started chanting something about four eyes to Hilary, but I ignored it as I stared at Nelly. “So, you wanna go?”
She kept her eyes on Hilary. “Go where?”
“Homecoming.”
“Shouldn’t you do something? They’re being so mean,” she said. More taunting could be heard, but I wasn’t sure what actions to take. If Evan were here, he’d know what to do. He was always the standup guy, the one people depended on. Besides, I didn’t like sticking my nose in other people’s business. Staying out of the way, not being seen or heard was my job at home—my old home, the home my parents had left…the home I no longer had.
“She’ll live. Every kid gets teased at that age.”
Hilary ran past us and toward the sidewalk. She knew not to cross the street by herself, so she stopped and turned back, waiting for me. I got up from the bench and slung my school bag over my shoulder. “So, yes? Homecoming?”
Her eyes narrowed on me. “No thanks, Zach.”
“Fine.” I brushed it off as no big deal, even though, on some level, it fucking hurt. There were plenty of other chicks out there, though, and Nelly was totally replaceable. I walked with Hilary, but she stayed ahead of me, not daring to look back. I opened the door, and she darted past me, shoving my body in the process. Guess I deserved it for not stepping in to help.
I made my way to the kitchen and the aroma of chocolate chip oatmeal cookies that filled the house. Ms. Rebecca made the best treats. I served myself a large glass of milk and snatched five of them in my hand. She loved baking, and every couple of days, there was evidence of a new recipe she’d discovered. A kind lady, with eyes like Evan’s and the heart of an angel, she was the epitome of what a mother should be. She was no pushover, though. When Evan and I got to horsing around too much, she laid down the law, and it wasn’t always easy to take. She usually scolded him more than she did me, though. I wasn’t her real son, so I got away with more shit than Evan could. Not that I tried to too often. I’d never do that to her.
“What’s Hilary’s deal?” Katie, Evan’s oldest sister, sat at the table working on her Anatomy homework. She was in her last year of high school and had a shorter class day than the rest of us.
“I dunno,” I said as I stuffed two cookies into my mouth within five seconds and grabbed a few more, gesturing to them as I spoke. “Evan had any yet?”
“No. Nor should he. He’s been a big baby about his sore throat all day.” Katie was pretty with short, sandy-blond hair and blue eyes. Girls wanted to be just like her, and every guy in school wanted to date her. Her kindness mixed with sass and charisma made her loved by the entire student body. That also gave Evan clout. They didn’t pick on him because they knew who he was related to. Too bad Hilary wasn’t in high school yet.
Katie was dating James, this major dork who was also a super nice guy. I didn’t know too much about him, but I guessed they’d probably get married one day. “Dress rehearsals start on Monday, so he has to get better by then.”
They were in the school production of Grease. She was playing Sandy, Evan was playing one of the extra T-Birds. This house was full of theatre nuts. Evan’s mom had been an actress at one point but gave it up to become a wife
and mother. A lot of good that did her. Her husband cheated on her with his co-worker and then left this family to start a new life with her when the other woman got pregnant. The whole family had been shaken, but I felt the need to keep Evan’s spirits up and let him know that he didn’t need the guy. At least he had his mother, who focused all her love and energy on her kids.
“Mom’ll be back in a bit, she ran to the store. She’s making chicken veggie soup tonight. Don’t spoil your appetite.” Katie’s voice faded as I climbed the stairs to the farthest room. It was the smallest, but it was homey. It didn’t feel like mine. Somehow, I knew the other shoe would drop, and everything would be taken from me.
I set my cookies, glass of milk, and backpack on the desk in the corner and kicked off my shoes. I’d say hi to Evan in a bit and sneak him a snack, but first, I took out my textbooks and got ready to dive in. My drive for learning was the only thing I had going for me. If I could make my future successful, be nothing like my parents, I’d consider that a win. So, I found solace and hope in my studies.
Before I had a chance to see him, my door swung open. For being sick, Evan looked just fine. He was one of those guys who seemed to have it all figured out. At least, that’s what everyone thought. Behind the veneer, he worked hard at perfecting his persona. The trait I found coolest about Evan, though, was that when he wanted something, he charged in like a bull. No fear.
What was surprising at the moment, however, was the look of anger on his face as he shut the door and approached me. “What the hell is this about Hilary crying?”
I got up from my chair and strolled to him, handing him a cookie. “Oh, just some kids razzing her.”
“And you didn’t do anything about it?”
“I didn’t think it was that big of a deal.”
Evan was fuming, his hands on his hips, his blue eyes troubled. “They were calling her four-eyes. They said she was an adopted weirdo. That we weren’t her real family.”
A Promise Broken Page 2