by Laura Benson
“Yeah, sure. No problem. You’re sure you don’t want me to go with you?”
He shook his head. “No, help Clara and just go back to the hotel. I have everything under control.” I just nodded, then turned back to Clara who was watching the two of us closely. Matthew surprised me and kissed my forehead he lingered more than was necessary.
“Well I guess that explains it,” Clara said as Matthew went back to Joey.
“It wasn’t supposed to happen!” I blurted out. “I never wanted to upset Joey.”
“Regardless of what you wanted to happen, it did, and that man in there is a mess. Charlie, is this really what you want? I thought we were becoming friends, but I’m starting to question that. Did you honestly think falling in love with his best friend was going to go over well with him? Jesus, even I could tell he still loved you. Maybe not the same as when you two were younger, but I could still see it all the same.”
I looked at Clara, I mean really looked at her and realized that she didn’t just care for him, she was also falling in love with him. “I’m sorry, Clara. If I could change how things happened within the past month, I would?” I hiked up my purse on my shoulder holding on to the strap for strength. “I too have eyes, and I see you have very deep feelings for Joey, but calling me out on my relationship with Matthew and Joey is really none of your business.” I turned on my heel and headed out the front door.
I sat in the truck for a while trying to calm down my already shot nerves. Clara was right that we were not taking Joey’s feelings into consideration, but I wanted that train to pass already. We hadn’t been in a relationship or hell, a friendship, in over three years. Was I not allowed to have a life outside of him? He couldn’t be my whole life forever.
I finally started the truck and drove to the hotel in a mindless funk. I would have to talk to Matthew and make a decision that wouldn’t hurt everyone involved. By the time I parked in the lot behind the hotel, my head was pounding and I just wanted to take a very hot shower and lie in bed shutting out the world for a bit. I could do that, couldn’t I?
I’m not sure how long I slept for, but the room was completely dark when a knocking on the door woke me up. I was groggy and dry-mouthed. A terrible combination at the best of times. I didn’t even bother to look in the mirror to see how badly I looked. I just went to the door and opened it. Never even turned on a light.
Matthew gave me his one-sided grin as I opened the door fully to allow him in.
“I woke you?” he took my hand and pulled toward the bed I just left. The covers were a mangled mess, so my nap wasn’t very restful. He pulled off his shoes and scooted over to the right side of the bed while I sat on the left side.
“How’s Joey?” I asked thickly.
“He’s fine, Charlie. He’s a big boy, and Clara showed up after he called her to apologize. I think something is going on between the two of them.” I turned to look at him, as he shrugged his shoulders.
“Yeah, I picked up on that earlier. After she reamed me a new one for being with you.”
He flicked his hand in the air. “Honestly, Charlie, right now it’s water under the bridge. Joey now knows about us, so we don’t have to keep it quiet anymore.”
I laid down on my left side, placing my left arm under the pillow that was cradling my head. “It’s not that simple, Matthew. You saw what this did to him. We can’t just flaunt this relationship in front of him because he now knows. That’s not fair to him.”
He rested his hand on his head as he craned his neck toward me. “What are you saying, Charlie?”
I took a long breath in and exhaled it out slowly. “I’m saying that I need to get back to Phoenix. Joey was right when he said I had no reason to be here anymore. You two are setting up your own label and…”
He interrupted me. “I want you to come along with us. I can pay you double what your father is paying you.”
I shook my head. “Matthew, that is not the point. The point is my being around Joey is a problem. I’m not sure we should take this relationship any further.”
“Bullshit, Charlie!” he fully sat upright. “You’re doing this because you’re afraid of hurting his feelings or because you don’t want to admit to your feelings. We made love, Charlie. We didn’t fuck. We didn’t have sex. You felt that connection as much as I did, and I’m not willing to walk away.” He stood up, quietly pulled his shoes back on, and huffed out of the room, leaving me to wonder what the hell just happened.
But the irony of that statement was he did just that. He walked away from me.
“Daddy, I’m ready to come home.”
He sighed on his end of the phone. I wasn’t a failure. I did the job I was hired to do. Now that Joey wasn’t attached to the label, I could go back to my apartment, my dog, and my boring job at the office where I’d be surrounded by people who couldn’t confuse my feelings or use them against me.
“I’ll have Janice look up flights tomorrow for you to come home. It’s late now. Are you okay?” he said.
I tried to hold back a sob, “I’m okay, Daddy. It’s just been a long month, and I’m ready to come home. How’s my Paco?” Dad went on about mom and the dog and how he didn’t think Paco would want to come back home with me. Figures, another man who’d want to abandon me in my time of need. Sometimes I felt like Typhoid Mary. How I managed to push people away from me was something I’d have to think long and hard about.
“I’ll have Janice email your itinerary to you. Andrew’s desperate to get you back to the office. He’s been moping.” I chuckled.
“He just wants someone to knock around. He knows you’re not that person, so his daughter is perfect bait.” Dad laughed at that, told me he loved me, and hung up the phone.
Today really turned into the suckiest day ever.
I grabbed my suitcases and started throwing things in, not caring if they got wrinkled. I just wanted to be done with L.A. and everyone in it. I’d had a bottle of wine sent up to help alleviate the thoughts running through my head. Well, I was hoping it would. But all it did was make me frustrated and want to call Matthew and beg him to come to me.
I sat at the table that Matthew and I ate at, looked around the room —and even though he wasn’t here— he filled every damn space and crevice. I was deep in thought when a pounding knock on my door woke me from my memories.
I startled, spilling wine and cursing. I walked briskly to the door and opened it. Matthew stood there huffing and puffing. Before I could say a word, he pushed the door open, slammed it closed with his foot and grabbed my cheeks, pulling my mouth to his, crashing his lips to mine. I felt momentarily blinded by the lust and the surprise of his being her.
“I sat down in the hotel bar nursing a whiskey for three hours before I got the courage to come up here and do that. I don’t just want you, Charlie, but I fucking need you in my life. You might think this was a brief affair, but to me, you’re everything.” He continued kissing me in between his words.
I was at a loss, and surprised, he came back to make such bold statements, and my heart was fluttering like a butterfly in my chest.
“What do you want from me, Charlie? Tell me and I’ll give you the whole world.” He moved his lips from mine and started leaving tiny kisses on my pulse points on my neck. A moan and a groan and I could feel his excitement growing exponentially. I brought my hand to cup his erection through his jeans.
“I don’t want anything from you, Matthew,” I whispered.
“Tell me anything, sweetheart.” I squeezed his erection so slightly his groan caused me to drip into my silk panties. One hand at the back of my head kept me close to his mouth while the other skimmed and kneaded my ass. I knew exactly what I wanted but was also afraid to tell him.
I closed my eyes as his assault on my neck continued to get me extremely horny. I knew in another minute my clothes would come flying off and we’d be making love.
And that’s when it hit me. I was totally and madly, completely off my rocker in love wit
h this man. I forcefully pushed myself back from him. I was panting so heavily I thought I might pass out.
I looked at him, he too was panting hard. I bit my lip and slowly stepped backward. One step, two, three. I pulled my shirt off. Another step back and I shimmied my yoga pants off. I stood directly in front of the bed in just my lace bra and panties.
“Matthew, for all that is good and holy, I need you to make love to me.” In what seemed like a single bound, Matthew was at me and on top of me, pushing me back into the bed. He was still fully clothed, but I didn’t care, because the look in his eyes told me everything I needed to know. Tonight he would be making love to me.
Matthew was deliberate in his lovemaking. He took his time exploring my body and loving every inch of me. We tangled with each other in every position possible. He caressed me, petted me, and brought me to the edge of ecstasy all night long. He licked, nipped, bit and brought me to such peace I wasn’t sure if I was still on this planet. I didn’t feel grounded by gravity because I was floating so high just from his fingers, his lips, and finally his cock. As soon as he entered me, I cried out in a furious passion.
He just looked down at me and didn’t say a word. He didn’t need to as I saw everything in those expressive eyes. I felt him pulse inside of me, but he still didn’t move. He filled me deep and full, that he didn’t need to do anything. I lifted my butt up and wrapped my legs around his waist. I brought my fingers to his lips and he licked each one separately. Ever so slowly, he started to move inside me, and I could feel every inch of him. I skimmed the back of his neck with my fingers, playing with the sweaty curls that popped up.
“Baby, you feel so fucking good,” while all I could do was grunt in response. He started picking up the pace placing both hands under my ass to lift me up just a bit higher. It was amazing, and I didn’t want him to stop. I could feel every breath and breeze on my body. I was so in tune with him. I had never ever felt this way before. I knew making love to Joey was never this transcendental. I wasn’t exactly sure what I was feeling, but this feeling completely and totally shattered me into a million and one pieces. Matthew was there to pick up those pieces with his soft words and blazing kisses. He continued moving in and out of me, asking if I was getting close. “Together, Charlie?” I dipped my head in response.
I could feel my walls tighten around him, loving him and trying to squeeze every ounce of love out of him. With one swift push, I felt my orgasm tip over and watched as Matthew followed me. It was the most beautiful sight. I trailed my fingers down his sweaty brow, catching the sweat before it went into his eye. The both of us were a sweaty mess and I felt even more invigorated. Matthew continued pulsing inside of me causing after quakes for the both of us. Looking at each other, we both laughed. He took care to pull out slowly. My pussy still pulsating on him. Pulling off the condom, he tied it off and tossed into the trash bin beside the bed.
“I love you, Charlie,” he pulled me closer to him as he continued his ministrations to bring me down from the ether space he brought me to. Our love making was intense, beautiful and something I knew I wouldn’t be able to live without on a long-term basis. I found myself thinking of being with him long-term which was shocking.
I knew he was expecting me to say it back to him, and I wanted to, I really did. Finding yourself at a crossroads in life at the tender age of twenty-three wasn’t exactly where I wanted to be, so I snuggled closer to him while breathing in his scent of whiskey, soap and sex. A combination too sexy to ignore. Matthew’s arms pulled tighter around me, and God this was feeling so good. I knew I could sleep peacefully this way. His light breathing tickled the back of my neck as we settled so closely together you couldn’t tell where I started and he ended.
I could give everything up for this man who I hated for so long. I thought of his offer to come aboard his new label, leaving my father’s employ, simply doing what I wanted and not being considered Dad’s daughter, but then I realized, I’d be Matthew’s lover, plaything, love toy, or that I got the job because I was sleeping with the boss. Going home was the best decision I could make without having the temptation of Matthew confusing my thoughts.
I woke up sweaty and sticky with a heavy man on top of me. I quietly tried to push him off of me so I could go to the bathroom. I needed to pee and shower. I smelled like wine, sweat, sex and Matthew. Although the last one wasn’t necessarily a bad thing. Matthew groaned slightly but still stayed asleep. I picked up my phone to check the time and realized it was late morning. We definitely slept in on a workday. I wondered what Debbi was thinking with the both of us not in the office. I also noticed the envelope on the phone alerting me to an email. Opening it up, I wasn’t surprised to see that it was from Janice. My dad’s assistant. It contained my flight information. Looking over it, I had twenty-four hours to get everything settled here. What I really wanted was to check on Joey and make sure we were okay. I couldn’t leave knowing he was angry with me at all.
I grabbed some clothes from the drawer, walked into the bathroom and took care of business. By the time I left the bathroom, Matthew was sitting up on the bed bare-chested with a sheet covering his very happy erection. I smiled at him as I put my hair up into a messy bun.
“What are the plans for today?” he asked, noticing that I was completely dressed in work clothes.
“Well it’s late, and we both need to get into the office and I need to settle up some things here.”
“And what about Mr. Happy?” he nodded to his protruding cock. I shook my head and continued about the room.
“He needs to go to work and not play all day.” I put a hand on my hip. “Aren’t you exhausted?”
“Nope,” he popped the ‘p’. He continued to look at me with lust-filled eyes, and I needed to keep him at bay.
“Why don’t you shower, and I’ll order up some coffee, sound good?” I hoped he’d agree with me, but he was lazily rubbing his hand up and down his cock. It was getting harder to make a coherent thought when he did that. Shaking my head, as I tried to erase the erotic scene before me, I picked up the hotel phone and buzzed for room service. I arranged for some toast and English muffins as well. “They’ll be here in a few, get in the shower, now,” I ordered.
“Charlie, is there a problem with us?” he asked getting out of bed buck naked, Mr. Happy still standing at full mast.
“Not at all, Matthew. We need to get to work, and I want to check in on Joey.”
Matthew stretched his arms above his head. “Charlie, he’s fine. I told you Clara was with him. Most likely, he got some once he sobered up.”
I took a deep breath and closed my eyes. This was not a visual I wanted to see. “Matthew, now you’re just pissing me off. Get in the shower and think about what you say before you blurt out from that pie hole of yours.”
He grimaced, “Just speaking the truth, babe.”
Once he finally went into the bathroom I released the breath I was holding. I wasn’t sure how I would break it to Matthew that I was leaving in the morning. He’d be pissed and probably think I was running away from him. But dammit, I wasn’t. As much as I wanted to stay and help him and Joey transition. I just wasn’t the person for the job.
While he was showering, the food came, and I made myself a plate of English muffin and poured a coffee. I didn’t realize how hungry I was until I put the food into my mouth. Living on just wine and sex really wasn’t the healthiest lifestyle. Matthew came out wearing the clothes he had on last night and I couldn’t help but giggle. This time he would be making the walk of shame.
He sat down opposite me and made himself some toast and coffee. He slathered strawberry jam on his toast so you couldn’t even see the bread anymore. I wasn’t sure what he did to keep his body in the shape it was, but the way I saw him eat you would’ve thought he’d weight nearly three-hundred pounds.
“Tasty?” I asked.
He spoke with food in his mouth. “Delicious.”
I took a sip of my coffee watching him destroy th
e toast. I realized then that he probably didn’t have any dinner either. We made love and promptly fell asleep, for hours.
“I’m going to cab it to the office so you can go home and get dressed.” I looked toward the door trying to make my escape.
“That’s fine. Is there anything imminent you need to take care of?” He wiped his hands on the cloth napkin, leaving stains of butter and jam.
“A few things. You okay to finish up here by yourself?
“Anxious to get away from me, babe?” he leaned both elbows on the table resting his chin on his clasped hands.
“That’s ridiculous, I’ll see you in about an hour, right? I just want to check on things.”
“Joey, being that thing? Are you jealous that Clara might’ve spent the night?” he challenged me.
I huffed angrily, “Of course, not. I just want to see how he is. Is this for any reason bothering you?”
“Not at all. I’m just wondering why girl wants to run away after a night of making love?”
“Matt, I’m not running away.” I was totally running away. “I just have work to do.”
He flung his hand toward the door. “Go, go. I’ll see you soon. And we’ll discuss where we go from here, understand?” His grave look told me everything.
I nodded my head and hightailed it out the door. It was a conversation that I needed to prep myself for.
Debbi greeted me at the desk. “Hey, Charlie. I thought you’d come in with Matthew?”
“Why would you think that?” she took me by surprise, and I sounder harder than I wanted to.
She looked at me sideways. “No reason, just that you two have been spending a lot of time together.”
“Yes, I guess we have been. He should be here shortly. I decided to cab it today. Any messages?” I asked.