Broken Heart Tails (Broken Heart Vampires)

by Michele Bardsley

“On behalf of our people,” he said formally, “I ask for your forgiveness. We want to offer you our appreciation, and thank you for your service.”

  Despite my emotional turmoil, I was intrigued. I opened the box. It was filled with shiny coins the size of nickels. I didn’t recognize any of the symbols etched on the alien money.

  “Um … thanks.” I handed it to my mother, and she picked up a coin and examined it. “Platinum. My goodness, Liberty, these are worth a fortune.”

  “We hope you are pleased,” said Cullen. “There is one thing more.” He lifted Zane’s arm and placed it on the table. He tugged the glove off the man’s left hand.

  Tattooed on the center of Zane’s hand was the circle with the two slanted lines. My heart dropped to my toes. I looked up in the empty black gaze of Zane.

  “This is your second gift,” said Cullen. “Your mate.”

  For a moment, I couldn’t speak. I stared at the familiar tattoo. “W-what does that mark mean?”

  “Two souls who become one,” explained Cullen. “After you mate with Zane, you will have the same symbol. It means you have bonded … I believe your word for it is ‘married.’”

  “Married?” I squeaked. I couldn’t look at Ralph. My heart tripled its beat as a lead weight settled in my stomach. I had inadvertently committed the one sin Ralph couldn’t forgive: I’d taken away his choice.

  “Is this what you want, Zane?” I asked. The man hadn’t said a word all day. Surely, he would have an opinion about taking a wife.

  “Oh, he doesn’t talk, dear,” said Mom. “He doesn’t know our language.”

  “I have to marry him and teach him English?” I sounded panicked and desperate, which was exactly how I felt. I looked at Cullen, but his odd eyes offered no answers. “How do you get divorced? You have to be able to unbond, right?”

  Cullen considered my words. “You do not unbond. We mate for life.”

  A wave of horror washed over me. “Wait a minute. If I don’t bond with Zane then … he never gets to mate?”

  “That is so.”

  “Cullen, we have a problem. We have a big problem.” I had discarded my coat before I sat down. Crap. My bra was still stuffed in Ralph’s couch. I unbuttoned my shirt enough so I could pull it down and show my mark. “I’ve already bonded.” I swallowed hard. “With Ralph.”

  * * * * *

  “Hiiiii,” said the zombie. “Saaaaave yooooou.”

  He reached down, grabbed my right ankle, and started dragging me out of the forest. I raised my head to keep from smacking it on the ground, but even with the cushion of my thick coat, I could feel every bump. Rocks jabbed my ass and other thigh.

  Ash followed, and even with her strange, jerky gait was going a lot faster than the zombie.

  “Hey!” I tried to shake my ankle of his grip, but he would not be deterred. “Hey! Zombie! Please, stop. Or hurry. Either one.”

  “Saaaaave yooooou,” he responded. He kept going at the same sedate pace.

  Ash reached me in mere seconds. She grabbed my hands, and being much stronger than my dead knight in flaking armor, stalled his progress.

  He sorta marched in place.

  Ash’s blue lights crawled onto me. I started to burn from the inside. I felt pulled and twisted. My feet went numb first and the numbness climbed into my calves and inched up my thighs.

  My vision stayed to gray. I was dying.

  “Libby!”

  Ralph’s voice. He was okay. But he’d come too late to rescue me. My vision swam, but I recognized his face. He was kneeling next to me. I felt that other people were nearby. On the other side of me, Cullen and Zane.

  “What are you doing?” Ralph yelled at Ash. “You’re killing her! Stop!”

  “She can’t stop.” This voice was Gabriel’s. “Why did she kill Synd and let his soul go?”

  “Maybe she didn’t. There’s gotta be something we can do,” said Patsy.

  I think she was the one who made the zombie let go of my foot. In a vague way, I was glad because it was bad enough I was dying. I didn’t want to pass away while a zombie held my leg up in air. I didn’t have much dignity as it was.

  No one could touch me, especially not Ralph. I knew he wanted to, and I wished he could. I really wanted him to hold my hand. I wanted to feel loved … one last time.

  Then suddenly, I was free.

  Without Ash trying to suck the soul out of me, I could breathe again. Ralph helped me sit up then he dragged me into his quaking arms and kissed me.

  “God, Libby. I thought I’d lost you.”

  “W-what happened?”

  Silently, he helped me turn around.

  Ash was standing face-to-face with Zane. Her hands gripped his shoulders as the blue worms of light wiggled onto him.

  I saw the moment his soul popped free. It was like a shining white ball of pure energy. It floated into the center of Ash’s chest.

  Then the lights solidified and Zane’s body was encased in the pulsing blue. Ash’s eyes were empty, and I knew that she had no control over what was happening.

  The form that had been Zane turned into a mist, which was sucked into Ash’s opened mouth.

  Then it was all over.

  Ash swayed. Gabriel caught her as she fell. She straightened and batted at his hands until he released her. She stumbled away, weaving like a woman who’d drank too much tequila, then she bent over and vomited.

  Without a word to any of us, she picked up her sword and in an instant, disappeared.

  Silence reigned for long minutes. Tears crowded my throat and seeped from my eyes. It took a while for me to look at Cullen.

  “I’m sorry,” I said. “I’m so sorry.”

  He looked at me. “Why?”

  “Because of what Zane did. Because he … sacrificed himself to save me.”

  “He did exactly as he should,” said Cullen. “I am proud of my son.”

  * * * * *

  “You know what would be really great?” said Patsy when we had all returned to the diner. Ralph hadn’t let go of my hand, not once. I felt protected and safe. “If we could live in this town without some kind of asshole trying to off us every couple of months. I’d like to raise my kids without fearing for their lives every day.”

  “That’s not possible,” said my mother. “You fear for them every second.”

  Patsy sighed.

  “If you shielded your town,” said Cullen, “no one would be able to see it. It would be protected from those who seek to do you harm.”

  “I can make manipulate fire, make water dance, send demons back to hell, fly around the sky, bend metal, talk to ghosts, shift into a wolf, and glamour others,” said Patsy. “But I still can’t make a whole town invisible.”

  “What does glamour mean?” asked Cullen.

  “It’s a vampire term,” I explained. I felt warmer toward Cullen. No matter what he said, I felt responsible for the death of his son. “It means that vampires can bend the wills of humans. They can make people do what they want.”

  Cullen thought about what I said, then he nodded. “We can do the same.”

  “Libby,” said Ralph. “You did that to Ruadan. That’s why he was acting so strange when he dropped you off at the house.”

  All eyes turned to me.

  “What the hell did you tell him to do?” demanded Patsy.

  I gulped. “I told him to go home. And sleep for a year.”

  “Home. Aw, crap. He went to Ireland,” she said. “I bet he’s underground. For a year. Well, at least that’ll keep him from trying to name the babies. His suggestions suck.”

  We laughed, and I was glad to have something to laugh about. My life had changed so much in just one week. I’d like to think I was a better person today than I had been the day I’d spied on Ralph in the cemetery.

  Then Cullen said, “The materials from which we make our ships are invisible. They bend light in a certain way. It would be possible to create the same effect for your town. You would be safe.”

/>   “Stan’s gonna have an orgasm,” said Patsy, grinning. “You wanna stick around and help him?”

  Cullen nodded.

  “We’d like to stay, too,” said Mom. “Elmore and I think this place is just heaven.”

  I was thinking more along the lines of hell, but hey, Mom was all about the silver lining. I was thinking about the clouds.

  * * * * *

  When I awoke, I was curled against Ralph, my ear pressed against his chest. His reassuring heartbeat matched the rhythm of my own.

  Wait a minute.

  I sat up and pressed my fingers against his carotid artery. Ralph’s eyes blinked open and he captured my fingers. “Ow. What are you doing?”

  “Checking your pulse.”

  “Are you kidding me?” Then he looked down at himself. “That’s weird. I feel like I have to pee.”

  “It figures a man would be concerned with his bladder as opposed to his heart.” I took his hand and placed it against his chest.

  His eyes widened. “I have a heartbeart. And a pulse!”

  “And a full bladder,” I added, grinning.

  * * * * *

  Stanley and Cullen confirmed it. Ralph was alive. Stan blabbed on about me having more base pairs and chromosomes in my DNA. I didn’t understand most of what he said, and Cullen didn’t explain it any better.

  What it boiled down to was this:

  My alien DNA, which Ralph imbibed when drank my blood, had marched along his body, repairing all his organs and starting his blood pumping. That was the difference between me being happy—thus being able to heal—and me being pissed off—thus being able to kill.

  Ralph was human. Sorta. My alien DNA had also helped his DNA along the evolutionary chain. Cullen gave him an inhibitor, too, just in case Ralph manifested any abilities.

  Ralph and I didn’t want powers. We wanted to live in a warm place year-round. We wanted a two-story house with a white picket fence and a swing set in the year. We wanted to raise the twins where there wasn’t a single vampire or werewolf or dragon.

  We wanted a normal life.

  And a happy ending.

  * * * * *

  Email from Libby Genessa

  Dear Mom and Dad,

  How are you doing? I’m sure everyone in Broken Heart misses you, but tracking the Bigfoot population in Oregon is important work.

  Ralph and I remain blissfully happy in Florida. With the money Cullen gave us, we were able to buy our house, a new boat, and a mini-van. We started college funds for the kids, and of course, Ralph never has to worry about paying his for his tuition or books. He’ll be a paramedic in no time at all.

  I love being a mom and wife, but I haven’t given up writing. I’ve actually started a novel. In my case, truth really is stranger than fiction. LOL.

  The twins are doing well. They called me “mommy” for the first time yesterday. I had to go into the other room to cry. They are so precious. They are also ornery. They’ve figured out how to call pizza delivery. I told Ralph speed dial on the home phone was a bad idea.

  I also have news. I’ve been trying to call your cell phone, but I know you have spotty service in your current location. So, here it is:

  I’m pregnant.

  You’re going to have three grandchildren! Ralph and I feel sure that we are going to have another boy. We’ve already decided to call him Zane. It’s only fitting since his sacrifice is the reason Ralph and I can be together.

  I can’t want to see you in two months. I wish it was sooner.

  Much love,

  Liberty

  The Tale of Princess Glitter and

  Her Really Stupid, Stinky Brother *

  By Jenny Matthews O’Halloran (Age 9)

  Princess Glitter had a daddy who went to heaven. She was very sad. Then mommy married this other guy. His name was Patrick. He had fangs and talked with a funny accent. Not ’cause of the fangs. ‘Cause he was Irish. And also a vampire. He’s not scary at all. He smells nice and gives good hugs and buys me stuff.

  Also mommy and Patrick found this baby named Rich, Jr. He poops a lot. And sticks EVERYTHING in his mouth. It wasn’t Princess Glitter’s fault she accidentally left those markers in the living room. How was I supposed to know he’d eat the orange one? And the blue one? And the green one?

  Anyway. Even though Rich poops and eats bad stuff, he’s still a better brother than Bryan. Princess Glitter put on her tiara and got out her magic wand and wished stupid, stinky Bryan away. But the magic didn’t work ’cause he came into my room and called me a twerp and said I ruined his iPod.

  I made it pretty! It was white, and now it has stars and hearts and a unicorn on it. I used my extra special glitter paint, too! He said I turned it all sissy. Well, YOU’RE a sissy, Bryan. Not me! And you better quit calling me twerp and not appreciating my art!

  So then Princess Glitter decided to get some ice cream, but mommy was in the kitchen making meatloaf and yucky Brussels sprouts. I waved the wand over the sprouts and shouted, “I wish all the yucky green balls of ew were disappeared!”

  Patrick laughed so hard, mommy made him leave. Then she told me to go upstairs and take off my tiara and my princess gown and wash my hands. She says I was gonna eat those Brussels sprouts … but I’m not! Princess Glitter does NOT eat yucky green balls of ew!

  Maybe I cried a little ’cause I was having a really bad day. Patrick came into my room and said he would make my Brussels sprout wish come true. He gave me a shiny pink tiara and a hug and then I asked him for a pony and he said yes.

  When I went to dinner, the Brussels sprouts were on the table, and I looked at Patrick. He winked. Then the WHOLE BOWL disappeared. Mommy made a fuss, but Bryan was so happy, he gave me a high five, and Rich clapped his hands, and mommy said, whatever, let’s eat. Only she and Patrick don’t really eat ’cause they’re vampires.

  After dinner, Bryan gave me a piggy-back ride and tickled me until I couldn’t laugh no more. Maybe Bryan isn’t so stupid. Or stinky. (Well, maybe a little.)

  So anyway. Princess Glitter saved the day. Or would have if my wand had worked better.

  The End!!!

  * This story was written not long after Jessica and Patrick were married and before the pixie wish that granted vampires food privileges in Broken Heart.

  Zerina, the Smart Ass Sidhe

  In the third book in the Broken Heart series, Because Your Vampire Said So, I introduce the character of Zerina, the purple-haired, mouthy, goth-dressing, English sidhe. I’ve always wanted to explore more about Zerina, and I was able to do so in Book 5, Over My Dead Body. I’m still very curious about Zee and her past, and maybe one day I’ll be able to explore it more fully.

  In the meanwhile, I’d like to share some of the columns that Zee writes for the in-town newsletter, The Broken Heart Banner. There’s also a bonus short story in this section—to give you a hint about which love interest I think would be a good match our beloved smart-ass sidhe.

  Ask Z: Columns from The Broken Heart Banner

  Dear Zerina: I think a certain lycanthrope is really cute. Is it true the lycans can’t date non-shifters? Why not?

  ~Furry Forlorn

  Dearest FF: What is the deal with people wanting to date the furry and

  the undead? I do not see the draw. Seriously. Are there no cute guys within your species? Okay. Here’s the deal. Lycans can’t procreate with non-lycans. It’s genetics. And with the population dwindling and less pups being born (or surviving), most lusty males are looking for women who can breed. So, again I say ... forget it already!

  Dear Zerina: I moved to this town after I found my fiancé canoodling with another witch. Anyway, now they’re getting married. What’s an appropriate gift?

  ~ Bitter in Broken Heart

  Dearest BIBH: Spiders delivered to the reception? Boxes filled with broken glass? Warts on their faces? Oh, right. You white magic wielders have that oath an’ all about harming none. Don’t send them a damned thing. Spend that money on a spa day and
forget about those losers.

  Damn it, Z: I. Hate. Yellow. And that’s not my original hair color. I look like a lemon!

  ~ You Know Who

  Dearest YKW: Still waiting for you to take back your insulting shoe comment.

  Dear Zerina: What’s the deal with the were-cats?

  ~Curious

  Dearest Curious: Seriously. Do I have to say it? Poke your nose around their territory and the cats will kill your curiosity. By removing your innards. Okay, probably not. They had to sign an agreement stating they’d take any grievances to our fair queen in exchange for getting sanctuary in Broken Heart. Still. Do you really want to risk getting scratched?

  Dear Zerina: I like my donor. I mean, I really like my donor. Do I tell him? Or do I keep my fangs to myself?

  ~ Female Who Likes Femoral Arteries

  Dearest FWLFA: Look. You’re a vampire. Practically an immortal. Dating a human is a bad freaking idea. Do you really wanna get stuck with some dude for 100 years because you can’t keep your panties on? Exactly. Go find another snack, and go date among your own kind.

  Dear Zerina: What if, hypothetically, I was harboring a zombie? I don’t think he’s been dead that long, and he can talk. A little. Mostly he slurs like he’s been on a three-day bender. Still. He’s nice. What should I do?

  ~ Digging the Dead

  Dearest DtD: Are you fucking kidding me? Ditch the dead dude, ya freak. Zombies aren’t sentient beings, and they so don’t bathe. I suggest you call Queen Patsy pronto and turn him over. And you know, get some therapy.

  Dear Zerina: I’ve been exclusive with my boyfriend for a year, but I think I want to date other guys. How do I tell him?

  ~Half In Love