by Lilly Wilde
“I don’t want to get into anything else with you.”
“Why?”
“Because,” I said.
“Because of my paralysis? Stop treating me like I’ll break if you don’t say or do what you feel you should.”
“Trust me, I have no preconceived notions about someone like you ever breaking.”
“You may not realize it, but you do.”
Had I been doing that? Had I been handling Aiden with kid gloves? Was that one of the reasons he wanted us to be apart?
“So why did you go to Dayton?” Aiden asked.
“Does it matter?”
“Everything you do matters to me,” he said.
He was really a piece of work. Hot and cold personified. “I wanted to talk to Mom.” He stared at me, confused. “I know with everything in me that she isn’t in that grave, but going there somehow helped me to feel my way through some things.”
“You’ve told me that you don’t think your mother died in the explosion, so why would you go there? I don’t understand.”
“Aiden, when it feels as if you have nothing to hold onto, you grasp for anything. Even something you know isn’t real.”
“Do you want to talk about it?” he asked, his voice soft with concern.
“No,” I said, as I unpacked Lyric’s bag.
Aiden was quiet after that, watching me as I moved around the nursery. I grabbed some of Lyric’s items that I wanted to take home, gave him a kiss, and then told Aiden to call when he was ready for me to pick up our son. As I was about to leave, Aiden said, “Looks like you made the paper.”
“That’s nothing new. Since news of our relationship went public a couple of years ago, I’ve become a regular contender for the headlines.”
“True, but this one has a slightly different angle,” he said.
“What are you talking about?”
“Check your phone.”
I grabbed my cell and saw the text from Aiden. I opened the link and sure enough, there was a picture of Kellan and me, smiling and covered in paint. We were a perfect depiction of the happy couple out for a night on the town. And the headline was enough to make anyone think exactly that. Is there already trouble in paradise?
I met Aiden’s gaze, guilt lining my stomach. “Isn’t this what you wanted?”
“I just want you to be happy.” He said the words, but the hurt in his eyes wasn’t difficult to miss.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
“What’s going on?” I asked, puzzled by the frazzled look on my sister’s face.
“It’s Bianca. She’s lost her freaking mind. Can I crash here?” Lia asked.
“Sure,” I said, confused by Lia’s sudden appearance.
“My timing couldn’t be worse. Sorry to add more to your plate,” she said.
“Don’t be silly. I’m here whenever you guys need me.”
Lia dropped her bag on the floor and shrugged off her backpack. “Where can I put this?”
“You can leave them here. I’ll have Karen put them away.”
“Who’s Karen?”
I rolled my eyes. “She’s the new housekeeper,” I replied.
“I thought …”
“I already know what you’re going to say. And you’re right. I didn’t want help, but it was all starting to be too much, so we have Karen and Traci. They’ve been with us for about a month now.”
“You don’t seem very happy about it.”
“It is what it is,” I said, blowing it off. “Have you eaten? I was just about to have dinner.”
“I’m starved,” Lia said.
“Great,” I said, perking up. “Now I don’t have to eat alone.”
“Where’s Aiden?” she asked, following me into the kitchen. “Don’t you guys have dinner together?”
“Not anymore. Not since the accident. Whenever I tried, he insisted he wasn’t hungry.”
Her brows scrunched. “So, he doesn’t eat?”
“At first he didn’t, not really, but Dianna finally got him to. She prepared his meals and took them up to the bedroom. I still asked him to join me, just in case his mood softened, but he didn’t budge, and to be honest, I was relieved.”
“Why?” she asked.
“Everything was so tense. Everything. It was like I couldn’t do anything right. When we were in the same room together, I walked on eggshells. I tried to help, tried to encourage him, but whatever I said or offered—he blew up.”
“Why are you talking in past tense?” she asked.
“Oh, I guess I should have led with that. Aiden moved out.”
Her eyes widened. “What?”
“Yes, a few weeks now.”
“Why didn’t you tell us? We could have been here.”
I shrugged. “I don’t know. I guess I figured it was temporary.”
“And you don’t think so anymore?”
I shook my head. “I don’t know what to think.”
“I’m sorry, Aria.”
“Thanks. It’s been hard … really hard, but things will get better.”
She took a seat at the counter as I finished the salad.
“Kevin says he’s doing well,” I said. “He doesn’t see any reason why Aiden shouldn’t resume full use of his legs in relatively little time. But for now, all I can do is be here in case Aiden finally decides he needs me. And I don’t think that will happen because he doesn’t know how to be on the receiving end of help.”
“I can see that about him, but he shouldn’t be mean to you.”
“I wouldn’t say he’s being mean. He’s just distant. And I think he’s doing it on purpose.”
“Why would he do that?” she asked.
“To protect me.”
She grimaced. “How is that protecting you?”
“He’s a man. One with a lot of pride and his own way of looking at things.”
“I hate that you guys are having problems.”
“Me too. But enough about me. What’s going on with Bianca?” I asked.
“Another case of someone who’s not thinking clearly. She and Landon broke up and she’s pretending she doesn’t care.”
“Hmm.”
“What?” Lia asked.
“I had lunch with Raina recently, and she didn’t mention it.”
“Maybe she doesn’t know.”
“I suppose.” I passed the salad to Lia and I grabbed the plates.
“Bianca is doing and saying things that are not at all like the sister I know.”
“Maybe it’s a process,” I said. “We all handle things like that differently.”
“If it was just that, there wouldn’t be a problem. But she’s been partying, drinking, and hooking up with random guys.”
“Are you kidding me?” I asked, shocked by Lia’s news.
“Nope.”
“This doesn’t sound like Bianca. Are you sure?” I asked.
“Yeah, I mean, I’m right there with her when it’s all happening. But in her defense, she’s not having sex. Just making out. She never even had sex with Landon.”
“Well, that’s good, but drinking and partying? Is that something she did before moving from Dayton?”
Lia grabbed a carrot from her salad, chomping on it as she looked up at me. “No. Neither of us did. I mean we went to the occasional party or hung out. We never did things like she’s doing now.”
“Why didn’t you call me? How long has this been going on?” I asked.
“Since just after Lyric’s party.”
“And you’re just telling me about it now?”
“Like I said, I didn’t want to worry you. You’d just gotten married, and to be honest, I thought it was gonna be a weekend or so and she’d flip back to herself. Then it became two weekends, then week nights, and that’s when the arguments started. We eventually stopped talking. She had people over again tonight. And it was the last straw—I packed a bag and left.”
I was surprised I hadn’t heard from Silas, the doorman slash lobby attend
ant at my condo. I’d asked him to keep an eye on the girls. “How about we go over together and talk to her?”
Lia shook her head in protest. “Not tonight. I need a break from her. I’m pissed at her right now.”
“I understand. But I’ll call and check on her.” I placed a bowl of potato soup in front of Lia and joined her at the table.
“Mmm. Smells good.”
“This is Jason’s recipe. He cooked it for us once. Aiden and I loved it, so Jason showed me how to make it.”
“Who’s Jason?” Lia asked, between forkfuls of salad.
“He’s one of the Raines’ personal chefs.”
“Don’t you mean one of your personal chefs? You’re a Raine now, too. Or did you forget?”
I took a sip of wine and rolled my eyes. “One can never forget that,” I said, laughing. I was so glad my sister was here. I hadn’t had a laugh or any normal conversation at all with Aiden. I missed that part of us.
“Where’d you go just now?” Lia asked when I’d become quiet.
“Thinking about Aiden. I love him so much. He’s hurting, and I know he’ll never admit it, but he’s scared. And I don’t know how to help him.”
“Didn’t you say his doctor recommended a counselor?” she asked.
I swallowed the cucumber I was chewing and said, “Yeah, but he’s not going to do that.”
“Did you ask him?”
“No.”
“You should,” she said. “He may surprise you.”
The only surprise I’d get from asking him something like that would be a polite reply instead of a rude one. Maybe I could go alone though, try to figure out how best to support him. “We’ll see,” I said.
“And if you need moral support, I’m here.”
“Thanks, Lia.”
“And thanks for letting me stay here. Maybe I can finally get some studying done,” she said, finishing up her salad.
“I’ll call Bianca in the morning,” I said. “See if I can figure out what’s going on with her.”
Lia took a drink and placed the glass on the table. “Just leave her be. She’ll calm down eventually.”
“No. I will not leave her be,” I said. “You’re upset with her right now, which is understandable. But we can’t let her continue like this. It will only lead to trouble. Trust me.”
Lia shrugged. “I guess. But I don’t want to talk to her right now.”
“And you don’t have to. I’m sure she’ll apologize, and you two will be like peas and carrots again.”
*****
After dinner, I helped Lia get settled and then checked on my husband. I called Scott and he confirmed that Aiden was in his office, buried in work. Some things would never change, regardless of his medical issues. To be honest, I was glad he was pouring himself into something productive, even if that something was Raine Industries.
Lyric and I were in the kitchen. He was rolling across the floor with his push-and-pull walking toy as I prepared some of his food for the following day. I decided to start the fixer process with my sister, so I sent Bianca a text. It took a while, but she finally replied. She and I made plans to meet for lunch at Grotto the next day.
I also texted Raina to see if she was aware of the reason Landon and Bianca broke things off. Although it was a rather bleak subject, I was glad to have something else to think about.
*****
“What’s going on with you and your twin?” I asked Bianca.
“How did you know about that? Did she call you?”
“Not exactly,” I said.
“What do you mean?”
“She’s staying with us for a few days,” I said.
“Oh.”
“Is that all you have to say?” I asked.
“Sisters don’t always get along, Aria. It’s no big deal,” Bianca said.
We were seated near the window at Grotto. Having already ordered a couple of drinks, we were waiting for our entrées. I smiled at Bianca and let out a sigh. “It’s good to see you, kid sister.”
“Since Lia is crashing at your place, you’ve already ‘seen’ me,” Bianca replied.
“Very funny. So, how are you?”
“I’m good.” She took a sip of lemonade and stared over my head.
“Then why are you looking everywhere but at me?”
“Oh, I don’t know. Maybe because of the way you’re looking at me. As if you’re trying to see what’s missing.”
I frowned. “I’m not doing that. I’m concerned.”
“For what? I’m fine.” She glanced at the dessert menu. It seemed more of an attempt to avoid eye contact than to review the list of excessive calories.
“Okay. You’re fine. But you and Lia are anything but. What’s going on there?”
She shrugged. “I don’t know. What did she tell you?”
“That you and Landon broke up. What happened?”
“I don’t really want to talk about it.” She returned her attention to the menu.
“Okay, then maybe you should tell me why you’re all of a sudden this huge party animal.”
Her eyes shot up. “Is that what Lia told you?”
“Is it true?” I asked.
“No.”
“So, there’s nothing much to anything your sister said. Is that what you’re telling me?”
She dropped the menu and rolled her eyes. “Oh, geez, Aria.”
“Okay, how about you tell me your version of what’s going on.”
Bianca finally spilled the details of her split with Landon. I could tell how much she was hurting. Her new activities were just coping mechanisms. This was her first real relationship, and she was taking its ending pretty badly.
“Would you like a little advice from someone who knows how it feels to hide behind her feelings?”
“I’m not doing that,” Bianca said, looking down at the table.
“That’s exactly what you’re doing. And I promise it will do more harm than good. The best thing to do is face your feelings head on. Maybe you and Landon need to sit down and talk. And if things don’t work out, make peace with that, but do it in a healthier way. Don’t let a man change you into something you’re not.”
“Oh, Aria, you’re overreacting to a few parties.”
“Am I?”
“Yes. I’ll be fine,” she said.
“I recognize what you’re doing. And I know you aren’t fine.”
“Couples break up all the time. You of all people should know that,” Bianca said.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” I asked more sharply than I’d intended.
“It’s not supposed to mean anything. I’m simply stating a fact. You and Aiden broke up, what? Two or three times? That I know of anyway,” she said.
Bianca’s reaction to my relationship with Aiden had always been either hot or cold. I’d noticed that shortly after Mom’s funeral. I’d thought I understood, but obviously, there was more to it than I realized.
“Bianca, everyone’s situation—or relationship, rather—won’t follow the path that Aiden and I took. We didn’t exactly have a textbook romance. There were so many extraneous pieces that had to come together for us to be where we are today.”
“That’s an awful nice way of saying that you two had to scratch and fight every step of the way,” she said.
That was it. I’d had enough. “What’s your problem?”
“I don’t want to be like you,” she spit out.
“What do you mean? Am I so horrible?” I asked.
She wouldn’t meet my eyes, her gaze lingering on the food the waiter had placed in front of her.
“Bianca,” I urged.
“Landon wanted to take our relationship to the next level. I didn’t,” she said, finally looking up at me.
“Then why were you making out with different guys?”
“Because I wanted it to get back to him. I knew it was stupid, but I wanted him to think he was the problem, and not me.”
“So, you’re riskin
g your reputation just to make him jealous?” I asked. “What sense does that make?”
“Why do you even care, Aria? It’s not your problem. Just go back to your fantasy world and let me figure this out on my own.”
“I care because you’re my sister and I love you. I’m looking out for you.”
“You never did before,” she accused.
“What’s going on? Where is all of this animosity coming from? If I didn’t know better, I’d think you hated me.”
“I’m sorry, Aria. And I love you. I do. But there are times I resent you. For walking out on us, for not being there when we needed you most, and you end up with this fairytale life. You have a family. Lia and I … we’re just … well, we’re practically orphans.”
“Bianca, haven’t I tried to make amends? Haven’t I included you in every part of my life?”
“Yes, but it somehow feels as if it’s too late.”
I’d prepared myself for an hour of investigative probing, but apparently only after a few questions, she was unloading more than I expected. “What’s brought this on?” I asked.
“It’s always been there. I just didn’t want to be a brat. I knew you felt bad, and I didn’t want to make it worse. And we’d lost Mom, and you were back in our lives, and I was so happy for that. I still am, but it just seems like there’s a gap. One that will always be there … and I spend a lot of time thinking about it.”
Bianca’s revelation caught me off guard. I stared at her, wondering how I could have missed all of this.
She forked her food around on her plate. “I think she would have still been here had you not left us.”
“How could you say that? That’s not fair to me, Bianca. I was just a child myself.”
“Yeah, but you knew enough to get out,” she said. “To not subject yourself to it. To take care of yourself. Lia and I didn’t have that. All we had was a mother we couldn’t understand. One who we didn’t think wanted us around. If it hadn’t been for Mrs. Warner and the other people at the church, I don’t know what would have happened to us. But you didn’t know any of that, did you? You were too busy walking away.”
I was trying to harness the anger I felt building, but she wasn’t making it easy. “You had a hell of a lot more than I did. I had nothing and no one. You have no idea what I’ve been through because of our family. Because of seeing my mother disappear into nothingness.”