And when Niko found out, he was going to hate her.
Sometimes, though, she wished she could be a normal woman. She’d like to have a relationship with Niko.
Stop that. Haven’t you learned yet not to wish for things? There was only wish she needed to come true. The wish that her parents and the twins were still alive. Since that was impossible, nothing else mattered.
A woman with long, shiny black hair walked across the lobby. A tight white sarong with a huge red hibiscus painted on it hugged her generous curves. As she passed them, she checked Niko out and smiled flirtatiously.
Jealousy sizzled through Jenna’s veins. Without thinking, she slipped her arm around Niko’s waist and glared at the woman. Until this was over, she could at least pretend he was hers. The woman’s smile deepened and she exaggerated the sway of her lush hips. Jenna’s hand tightened.
Niko chuckled and squeezed her arm. “Don’t worry, I’m not going anywhere.”
She pinched him and let go, making a big show of looking around the lobby while trying to hide her embarrassment over her reaction. Water fell from the center of the atrium’s roof into a shallow pond dotted with lily pads. At the far end of the pond, water tumbled into another pool set on the lower level next to the coffee shop. Palmettos, palms and a variety of flowering plants she didn’t recognize sat in pots and hanging baskets.
The air was slightly humid and smelled rich and earthy. It was beautiful. Yet not the sort of place she imagined SSU agents being able to afford. Niko, however, said the top-notch security justified the price.
He’d made it very clear on the plane that Acapulco was Alvarez’s territory and therefore extremely dangerous. She wasn’t to leave the room unless either he or Rafe was with her. She couldn’t trust anyone but him and Rafe. Given the cuts and bruises on her face, she was to keep her face hidden beneath this wide-brimmed hat and dark glasses when out in public, until he told her otherwise.
She squelched her surge of resentment over Niko’s rules. But Rafe’s flight was still stuck in Los Angeles, so for now she had to stick with Niko.
Kai. Revenge. That was what mattered. Not her feeling hurt and angry because Niko was bossing her around like she wasn’t capable of taking care of herself.
Although a tiny part of her thought his need to protect her was rather sweet.
Five minutes later, Niko had checked them in and she followed him into their suite. Uh-oh. The peach and cream bedroom had only one king-sized bed.
She thought about lying in the bed next to Niko. Heat and longing spiraled through her veins. God, but she wanted to pull Niko onto the bed. Lose herself in the taste and feel of him until she had no memory of pain and humiliation. Wanted to fall asleep, exhausted, in his arms.
She coughed and turned away, pretending interest in the contents of the mini bar. Glad that the dark glasses she wore concealed her expression from Niko.
“I’ll sleep on the sofa bed,” Niko said as if reading her mind. “When in public, you’re my woman. You’ll be safer that way. Once this door closes, we’re just…colleagues.”
Jenna nodded, seeing the wisdom in his plan, even though part of her wanted him beside her. They had so little time left. With any luck they’d find Kai in a day or two. Niko would return to his life and she…Well, her course had been determined the night of the attack. She’d always known this time would come.
Her heart clenched on an aching denial. Just because she didn’t want to say good-bye to Niko, didn’t mean she could give up her revenge.
Niko’s phone beeped. He glanced at the display a second before a knock sounded at the door. “That’s our SSU contact with our weapons and gear,” he said. “Wait in the bedroom. The fewer people who see you, the safer it is. In case Alvarez compromises someone.”
She nodded and slipped into the large bedroom. With the door closed behind her, she removed her sunglasses, took off the large, elegant hat, and slid her feet out of the strappy high-heeled sandals.
The plush cream carpet was soft beneath her bare feet and she sighed in relief. Once upon a time she’d loved dressing up in heels and skirts and being girly. Back then, she hadn’t thought twice about wearing stilettos for an entire day. But after a two-year vacation, her feet had screamed at her to get the tight shoes off.
She arched first one foot, then the other, sighing out loud as the tired muscles relaxed. Her whole body was tight after the plane ride, so she worked through a short series of stretches.
When she was done, she spun around, enjoying the feel of the dress twirling around her. During their long layover in L.A., Niko had taken her shopping for tropical clothes. She hadn’t been able to resist buying a few fun, flirty outfits along with more practical garb.
This dress was aqua with bright orange and yellow flowers. The fabric crisscrossed between her breasts in a generous drape. The skirt fell loosely to a handkerchief hem and floated behind her when she walked. She felt feminine, yet not at all slutty like the way she’d felt in the clothes Mark had made her wear in Moscow.
And the expression on Niko’s face when she’d walked out of the dressing room had sent a sensual thrill down her spine. Before he masked it, he’d looked like he wanted to devour her.
The door handle turned. Niko stepped inside, carrying a duffel bag. Jenna stopped mid-pirouette, embarrassed. Unable to meet his eyes, she hastily smoothed down the skirt and busied herself with the flower arrangement on the dresser, hoping he couldn’t see the faint flush on her cheeks.
“Don’t be shy. Dance if you want. I like watching you.” His voice was warm with approval, which only caused heat of a different sort to flood into her face.
“You don’t smile enough,” he added.
She shrugged and looked away. Happiness still felt like a guilty pleasure. But there was no way to explain that to Niko without giving herself away.
As if sensing he’d embarrassed her, Niko changed the subject. He dumped the bag on the bed. “Take your pick of weapons. Keep at least a knife on you at all times. There should be appropriate sheaths to go under your clothes.”
Jenna raised her eyebrows. “How did you arrange all this so quickly?”
Niko’s slight smile was pure devil. “I could tell you, but then—” He shrugged.
Jenna rolled her eyes. Right. As if the SSU didn’t handle such requests all the time. Still, Niko’s humor warmed her.
“I’m going to shower,” he said. “Then I’m going to leave you here while I look up some of my old contacts.”
Her head shot up. “Hey! No fair.”
His open hand warded off her protest. “No. You can’t come with me. I have to do this alone. The people I’m meeting won’t talk to me if I’m with you. Besides, I wouldn’t let them in the same room with you. They have no manners when it comes to women.”
He made the statement casually, but she sensed an underlying tension. And there was something bleak in his eyes that made her want to tell him not to go.
How much danger was he putting himself in?
“Niko, why are you so tense? What’s so dangerous for you here?”
His eyes grew cold and distant. “None—”
“Don’t you dare say it’s none of my business. You’ve told me how much danger I’m in.” She waved her hand toward the door. “If there’s a chance you won’t come back, I deserve to know why. Please. You can trust me.”
She knew Niko had no reason to trust her. Plus, she was keeping far too many secrets from him. Yet it was suddenly critically important she understand the shadows in his eyes.
He opened his mouth. Closed it. Sighed and rubbed the scar on his biceps. Then his lips flattened and he bit out, “I used to be Alvarez’s right-hand man. This was once part of my territory. I still have a lot of enemies here.”
She flinched. Dear God—
“Yeah, I’m no saint, Jenna, and I’ve served the prison time to prove it. Remember that.” Before she could reach out and smooth away the bitterness on his face, he pivoted on his h
eel and stalked into the bathroom.
Jenna sank onto the sofa. Steepled her hands and rubbed her fingertips over the crease between her eyes. Certain that whatever had caused the haunted flare of pain in his eyes was the reason he understood her nightmares so well.
How many people heard his words and believed Niko a criminal at heart? Too many who mattered, judging by the hurt underneath his bitterness. Oh, she was certain the facts were true. That would explain why he was so familiar with Alvarez and why he was such a ferocious fighter.
But Niko wouldn’t have tried so hard to get her to give up her search for Kai, been so determined that she stay innocent, if he was as evil as Alvarez. She had no doubt he’d been undercover, forced to hide his true nature from the vicious men she heard Alvarez employed. Forced to appear to be like them.
How had he survived without losing his soul?
Scared at the urgent need to comfort him, to assure him that he’d misunderstood her reaction to his news, she pushed to her feet. But the sound of the shower stopped her. She couldn’t storm in on him. Not when he was naked.
And that brought up other images she immediately rejected. Other ways she could comfort him.
Dammit, she had to stop these bursts of emotion and fanciful imaginings. They were messing with her head. Interfering with her mission. She turned around and stormed over to the window.
She shouldn’t be worrying about Niko venturing out into a city where death stalked him. She should be thinking about Kai. She clutched the drape in her hand and stared blindly out the window. Thank God Niko had left her alone for a little while. She needed time to shore up her defenses and remind herself of her mission.
But as she worked to clear her mind of her worry over Niko, clarity eluded her. Instead, her mind returned to the fact that Niko was naked. Just on the other side of the bathroom door. She closed her eyes, imagining only too well how the water would sluice down his body. Wanting desperately to join him. To feel his muscles slippery under her hands as she—
Stop it!
In desperation, she spun away from the window, finding a much needed distraction in the television remote control sitting enticingly on the coffee table. She snatched it up and flipped channels until she found a telenovela. Maybe watching fictional drama would keep her mind out of forbidden territory.
Fifteen minutes later she sensed Niko’s presence. She ignored him, pretending to be engrossed in the program.
“Tu comprendes español?” Niko asked.
Jenna turned around. Oh, Lord. He looked fantastic. Too sexy for her peace of mind. His slightly damp hair was slicked back from his face, showcasing his strong jaw darkened with a day’s worth of beard. He’d put on a crisp black suit with a black silk shirt and tie. He looked like a well-dressed gangster. Or the right-hand man to the head of a vast criminal organization.
She wanted to apologize to him, to kiss him and chase away the distance in his eyes. But some little voice of self-preservation told her it was safer to let him keep his distance.
She yanked her mind back to his question. “Yes,” she answered in Spanish. “I dated a guy from Spain my freshman year in college. He helped me ace my Spanish class. You said you’d learned Spanish from your mother?”
“Yeah. Mamá is Mexican,” Niko said. “A distant cousin to Alvarez.”
She narrowed her eyes. His repeated reference to Alvarez was obviously an attempt to make her distrust him, maybe even hate him. But why?
Niko shot his cuffs and glanced at the television. “I’m heading out now.”
His reluctance to leave her alone ruined his attempt to play the bad boy. Maybe he wasn’t trying to scare her. Maybe he was just trying to put himself back into the role he’d played with Alvarez.
“I’ll be fine,” she reassured him. “No one could possibly have recognized me under that hat and those huge sunglasses. We’re registered under false names. How on earth would Alvarez know we’re here?”
Niko’s expression turned flat and cold in that way that always scared her a little. “Don’t underestimate Alvarez’s power.”
He walked over to the bag of weapons. Two pistols and at least as many knives disappeared into his suit.
She stood up, alarmed at the idea he was in such danger he had to arm himself to the teeth.
“Remember, don’t leave the room,” Niko instructed.
She saluted him. “Aye, aye! I’ll be good and stay here.” She didn’t care about the danger to herself, but she knew if she followed him Niko would be too worried about her to mind his own safety.
Which made something deep inside her go all soft and heated.
He reinforced his command with a hard glare, then walked toward the door. But after four paces, he stopped. Cursed softly. Retraced his steps and pulled her against him for a kiss that managed to be both passionate and achingly tender.
A moment later, he was gone.
Stunned, Jenna stared into space for a very long time, her trembling fingers touching her lips. Trying to convince herself she shouldn’t ask for another kiss when he returned.
Finally, she shook herself out of her reverie and refocused on the telenovela. When it was over, she unpacked and took a shower, then changed into a loose cotton jumpsuit. But she still couldn’t settle down. She walked over to the window, but even the peaceful scene of the waves breaking against the beach below did nothing to calm her restlessness.
She felt like she was about to burst through her skin. She was buzzed on the anticipation of finally finding Kai and edgy with worry over Niko.
Underneath it all lay a racing desperation. A small voice chanted that she had to finish her mission soon, before her rioting emotions gained root, softening her into someone incapable of killing.
As much as she missed that girl she’d been Before, she couldn’t afford to be that girl again. That girl was incapable of vengeance. That girl had to stay dead.
But her soul cried out “Unfair!” and the air spun in and out of her lungs in a dizzying rhythm.
She pressed her forehead against the cool glass of the window. Trying to tell herself she wasn’t trapped. That her goal was just and right.
Yet she envied the people down on the street below. Moving about their business with nothing more important on their minds than meeting a friend, picking up a trinket for a sister’s birthday, or finding a new place to try for dinner. Things she’d never experience again.
God, she had to get out of here!
Niko claimed hotel security was strong, so it had to be safe if she just went downstairs to the gift shop. Right?
Of course, right. Besides, she had insurance in case she got into trouble. She took out one of her suicide pills and tucked it against her back tooth. She strapped a knife to her thigh and put a small handgun in her purse, along with some pesos, her room card, and the cell phone Niko had bought her in case of an emergency, programmed so she could text him. She put on her hat and tinted glasses, then headed out.
The hotel had a series of gift shops along the concourse branching off from the lobby. Jenna browsed through the clothing shops, pretending she was normal and would live long enough to need a large wardrobe full of beautiful clothes. Deciding what she’d buy and on what occasions she’d wear the clothes. Every now and then she glanced out the window to the sidewalk beyond, hoping to see Niko returning.
She had just looked back at the rack of bolero jackets in front of her when her mind caught up with her eyes. Her head snapped around and her eyes focused on a man walking past the next shop window. His hair was the wrong color, but his gait was terribly familiar.
Kai!
Jenna rushed out of the store. She glanced to her right. There. Passing the nightclub.
She hurried down the street. Remembering Niko’s warning, she pulled out her cell phone and sent him a brief text message. She couldn’t wait for him, though, or she’d lose Kai.
Chapter 18
Niko pushed through air congested with lies, blood and fear, heading desper
ately for the door of the upscale strip club. Dark memories choked him. He slammed his palms harder than intended against the door, causing it to bounce off the wall with a loud smack.
He had to get out of this place. Away from the knowledge of the people he’d hurt in order to establish dominance as Alvarez’s second in command. But the terrified eyes of the club manager were hard to forget. The man remembered Niko, and the week he’d spent in the hospital after Niko disciplined him for embezzling.
The manager had gotten off lightly. Alvarez would have killed the man if he’d known the truth. But that didn’t make Niko feel any better.
Christ, he felt tainted. Dishonorable.
He rolled his shoulders. He hated slipping back into this role. Hated the fear and slavering respect people gave him. Hated the way Jenna had flinched when he’d told her the truth.
He wanted to shout that he wasn’t that vicious, callous man any more. But until he found Aunt Madalena, he must be that man.
Niko took a deep breath, letting the faintly salty air clear his lungs. The club’s air conditioning hadn’t kept sweat from pooling under the Kevlar vest he wore beneath his shirt. He wanted to tear off his suit jacket, but walking down the street with an exposed shoulder holster was a bad idea. He’d either get shot or end up having to shoot someone. And while violence would release some of his spiraling tension, he couldn’t afford that kind of attention.
Instead, he jerked out the knot holding his tie and unfastened the first button of his shirt. Finally took his first easy breath in hours. The oppressive heat meant he’d be soaked with sweat by the time he reached the hotel, but he’d deal.
He’d accomplished his mission. That was what mattered.
The men who ran in the shadows knew he was back. This was the fourth place he’d visited tonight, and everyone assumed he was still Alvarez’s right-hand man. His lips quirked. He’d been right. Alvarez’s pride hadn’t allowed him to denounce Niko as the man who’d turned him in to the authorities.
And that was going to work to Niko’s advantage. Because the men he talked to said Alvarez was offering a reward for Paterson. With Alvarez out of town, people would now bring that information straight to Niko.
Vengeance (SSU Trilogy Book 1) Page 18