The woman steps closer to him. He grabs her shoulder and she smiles, letting me know there’s a familiarity there.
“Who the hell is that?” Becca comes up next to me.
I shake my head, my eyes glued to the scene before me. I have no idea who that is. But Chase obviously does.
I’m frozen in place, the stitches holding my heart together coming loose with every beat. She rises on her toes. No. I can’t look away, even as she slams her mouth on his, her fingers diving into his hair.
Bile rises in my throat and my stomach drops to the floor, making me dizzy. Becca’s hand shoots out and grips my arm.
“Asshole!” Becca yells.
Her voice carries. Chase jerks back, whipping his head in our direction. His eyes lock on mine, widening in horror. The woman pulls at his arm, but he shoves her away, racing toward me.
My feet back up, my head shaking. I can’t. I won’t.
I turn. And I run.
49
Chase
The text from an unknown number telling me “I look tasty” has me snapping my head up and scanning the area.
I’m outside waiting for the private investigator to get here, and who shows up instead? My psycho ex-girlfriend, who is proving with every fucking minute that it was a good decision to end things. Where was this crazy hiding all the years we were together?
“Chase.”
Motherfucking Marissa. I hear her voice before I see her, but soon enough she’s standing right in front of me.
“Marissa, what the fuck are you doing here? How many times do I have to tell you this isn’t going to happen?” I hiss at her, trying to keep my voice low.
She smirks, stepping into me. I grip her shoulders to push her back. Before I can get a word out, she plants her glossy, sticky lips on mine. They feel wrong. I rear back, but her fingers have locked in my hair and she presses harder against me. I try again, grabbing her wrists and wrenching my head just as I hear someone yell. I break free, looking at Marissa, disgusted. I turn toward the noise.
When I lock eyes with Goldi, my heart free-falls through my body and drops on the ground at my feet. Fuck. She looks gutted.
No.
I won’t let this happen.
Marissa tries to pull me back, but I don’t spare her a second glance. All I care about is getting to Goldi. Determination invades my bloodstream, propelling me faster.
“Goldi, wait!” I yell. “Goldi!”
She starts running, stumbling through the doors to the rec hall, and I chase her. I don’t want to make a scene, but I will if I have to. If I let her get away, I’m not sure I’ll get her back. Fear prickles my neck at the thought, but I bat it away.
Goldi pushes her way through the crowd. The sea of people slows her down, allowing me to catch up just as she hits the doors on the other side of the room.
I grab her wrist. “Goldi, damn. Hold up. That was not what it looked like. If you will just listen–”
She shakes her head and pushes through the doors. I follow her. I’ll always follow her.
It’s dark. Just a deserted hallway lined with empty rooms. Goldi runs to one of the doors and pulls, but I come up behind her and slam it closed again.
“Goldi, baby. Please. Just fucking talk to me. Say what you need to say and then give me the same courtesy. I’m telling you, that was not what it looked like.” My tone is pleading—desperate for her to understand. I will do anything to be with her. I plan to spend the rest of my fucking life with her, but we both have to be in this—through the good and the bad. We won’t make it if we aren’t.
She spins around, tears making her cheeks glisten. “Talk then.”
I open my mouth, but hesitate, trying to figure out where to start.
“Go on then, Chase. Talk!” she yells, her arms curling around her stomach.
My tongue shoots out to wet my lips. “That was Marissa. My ex. I ended things for-fucking-ever ago, before I even knew there was a chance with you.”
She huffs.
“It’s true. I ended things because every time I looked at her, I wished it was you.”
“Then what’s she doin’ here? And was that her the other night? On your ph–phone?” She sniffles.
“Yes.”
She turns her head, twisting her body, but I step closer, pressing her into the door and blocking her path. “Let me explain.”
Her eyes search mine, and she must see the truth in them, or fuck—I don’t know, maybe she’s just tired of fighting me. Either way, she blows out a shaky breath and relents.
“Marissa didn’t take the breakup well. She started sending me messages, and I swear to God, Goldi, I fucking shut them down every time. I blocked her number. I didn’t know she would be here. Anna invited her when we were still together, but I never thought in a million years…” I hang my head, grabbing my hair.
“But you kissed her,” Goldi bites.
I lift her chin with my fingertips. “She kissed me.”
Goldi shakes her head. “No—”
“Yes. Think about what you saw. Really think about it, baby. Did you see me kiss her back? Did you see me encourage her in any way? I was out there waiting for that Mason guy. I didn’t even know she was here. I promise you, Goldi.”
Her eyes are locked on me as she chews that beautiful bottom lip. My thumb reaches out, tugging it from between her teeth. “You have to trust me. This won’t work without it.”
“So now you don’t want us to work?” she accuses, again turning her head and trying to rip from my grasp.
I bring her face back. “I want us to work more than I’ve ever wanted anything in my life. More than Sam’s company. More than my mom’s love. More than finding Lily.”
She gasps.
“I fucking love you, Goldi. Don’t you know that? I love you. I’m in love with you. I have been since I was thirteen-years-old. And I want to spend every day for the rest of my life showing you just how much. I want to make up for all the days we’ve lost. But if you don’t trust me… if you can’t move past our history, we’ll both end up miserable. I don’t want that for you. Or for me.”
The air is muted behind the sound of my heart beating in my ears. I wait for her to say something. Anything.
She searches my eyes, sucking that lip between her teeth again and exhaling. “I love you, too.”
Relief surges through every cell in my body. Thank fucking God.
I lean in and kiss her, not giving her a chance to take back her words.
“Say it again,” I mumble into her mouth, my hands cupping her cheeks.
“I love you.” She smiles against my lips.
A door bangs open, and I groan.
“Oh, shit. My bad. I didn’t mean to… Lee? Is that you?”
We both turn toward the voice and my body stiffens as I see the guy from earlier today. What was his name?
“Logan, hi.” Goldi pushes against my chest, forcing me back a step as she straightens her dress.
Logan. That’s right. I look between them. He knows Goldi, too?
“So this is him, huh? Chase Adams? I never woulda guessed,” he chuckles, shaking his head slightly.
I look between them. Goldi’s cheeks are flushed a beautiful shade of pink, and I don’t know if it’s from me or from Logan—who all of a sudden I can’t fucking stand.
“Yep. He’s the one.” She beams at me, gripping my hand in hers. My chest swells with her attention.
Logan rubs the back of his neck. “Ah, hell. I’m sorry, man. If I had known I was talkin’ about your girl earlier today, I never would have brought it up.”
Talking about my… My eyebrows lift as his words hit me. “Goldi was your ‘piece?’”
He raises his hands in front of him, his face apologetic. “She ended things though, so don’t worry. She’s all yours.”
I laugh. Is this motherfucker serious? Of course, she’s mine. She’s always been mine. I take a step forward, a smile on my face as I imagine all the ways I’ll make him
realize his mistake. Goldi’s hand tugs me back.
“Chase, don’t do this. You were just talkin’ about trust. So trust me when I say I’m yours. Just like I’m trustin’ you.”
I breathe sharply through my nose, leaning my forehead against hers. “Promise?”
“Cross my heart and hope to die.”
I look back toward Logan. “Listen, man—” Yelling cuts me off, muffled, but close enough to the door that the voice carries.
Fuck.
Mr. Carson.
My head swings to Goldi. I don’t let go of her hand as I rush through the doors back into the party. I stop short, watching the scene with wide eyes.
Mr. Carson has Sam’s shirt crumpled in his fist and is being held back by Jax. His face is red and spittle flies out of his mouth as he slurs his attack.
“No! I don’t give a good goddamn. I know… know what you said Sam, you sonnofabitch.”
Goldi is a statue, her worst fear playing out in front of her. Where the fuck is Eli?
By the time I get across the hall to them, Mr. Carson has been wrangled somewhat under control. Jax’s hair is a mess, half of it falling out of his bun, and his eyes are round with shock as he tries to contain the beast of Mr. Carson’s despair. It’s obvious he had no clue this was going on.
Oh, Goldi.
In any other circumstance, I’m sure Jax would love to argue my interference, but at this moment he shows nothing but gratitude as I step between Mr. Carson and Sam to defuse the situation.
My gaze bounces to Sam. His face is red, and his lip is bleeding, but mainly he just looks sad.
I turn my attention to Goldi’s dad. “Mr. Carson. Can you focus on what I’m saying to you?”
“Boy, you... you’re always showin’ up when you’re not wanted. This here is man’s business.” He sways in Jax’s arms. Jax’s arms tense as he tightens his grip.
“I’m sure it is, sir. How about we take it outside and handle it there?”
The room is silent, hundreds of eyes watching as the Carson family secret spills into the open.
“I ain’t got nothin’ else to say.” He points a finger at Sam. “You know… Gail was… I can’t. How could you just bring her… up? My wife.” He crumples, gripping his chest and sobbing.
I suck in a breath and twist around to peek at Sam. He watches his old friend with a frown, his forehead creased in concern.
“Mr. Carson,” I try again. “Let’s go out front, yeah?” I grasp his shoulder to steer him, but he jerks, the sudden movement pushing Jax back and allowing him to break free. He storms out of the hall, leaving a trail of gossip behind him.
“Shit,” I mutter. I search for Goldi in the crowd. Her face is drained of color and she’s clenching her fists. Over and over. Like the motion is the only thing that’s keeping her together. I turn quickly to Sam. “You okay?”
He lifts his chin in a nod, and then I’m chasing after Mr. Carson. I’m not sure where he’s going, but I’m not trying to let him get there on his own. I run into the fresh air, the calm of the night deceiving with its stillness. I search for Mr. Carson or his truck, but can’t find either.
Fuck.
Goldi bursts through the doors soon after me, panting from exertion.
“Is he gone?” She whips her head around.
“I think so. Want to go look for him?” I’m already grabbing the keys from my pocket, but she shakes her head, putting her hand on my arm to stop me.
“No. We’ll never find him, and even if we did…” She shrugs. “Daddy needs to learn to lie in the bed he makes. There’s only so much I can do.”
I pull her into me, hugging her tight and kissing the top of her head. I know how hard that is for her to admit. But I’m so fucking proud of her for realizing it doesn’t fall on her shoulders. I peer over her head, keeping an eye out in case Marissa decides to make another appearance. I have no clue where she went. Goldi says something, but the sound of an engine drowns her out. We turn toward the noise as a motorcycle rumbles into the lot, parking right outside the front doors. A man climbs off the bike, pushing his brown hair off his face and shrugging out of his black leather jacket. His arms are covered in sleeves of ink. He definitely isn’t from Sugarlake.
“Who is that?” Goldi asks.
I shake my head because I have no fucking clue. He lights up a cigarette, worn black combat boots crossing as he leans against his bike. He’s got a cell in his hand, and after a second my phone vibrates in my pocket. I grab it, staring at the screen.
Mason: Here.
My head snaps back to the biker. That’s the private investigator?
“What is it?” Goldi asks, peeking at my phone.
“I think that’s the guy, the PI. I’m gonna go talk to him. Want to come?”
She shakes her head. “I need to go hunt down Eli and tell him about Daddy.” She leans up and gives me a kiss. “Find me after?”
I nod, kissing her before she walks away.
We’ve caught Mason’s attention and he swaggers over. The closer he gets, the more his details become clear. He’s a fucking giant. I’m not a small guy by any means, but he towers over me.
“You Chase?”
“Yeah. Mason, I’m guessing?”
“The one and only.” He smirks, taking a drag off his cigarette.
“Great. Thanks for making the trip.”
He gets right to the point. “I don’t have much time. There’s a naked redhead in my bed back home just waiting for me to tear that ass up, so let’s be quick. Who you looking for?”
“My sister. I don’t really know much. Fucking nothing, actually—other than she might be in Arizona.”
He flicks his cigarette and sucks in air through his teeth. “Oh. Nope. I don’t go anywhere near the west coast. Not even Arizona. I’ll see what I can find by searching some records and making some calls, but you’re shit out of luck for anything else.”
“What the fuck do you mean, you don’t ‘go near the west coast?’ I was told by you that you could find anybody.”
He stands up straighter, his posture becoming defensive. His golden eyes flash. “I can. I’m just not going to.”
My nostrils flare and I clench my fists, trying to stay calm. “Price isn’t an issue. I’ll pay you whatever you want. I just… I need to find her. I need to know she’s okay.” I point at him. “You’re a fucking prick, but if you’re the best, you’re the guy I want.”
Mason’s chin lifts as he assesses what I’ve said. After a tense minute, a smile curls his face. “Yeah, alright. I’ll do it. I’ll give you my email and you can send me what I need. We do this on my timeline, you get me?”
“Yeah, I get you,” I say through my teeth.
“Wonderful.” The smile on his face grows. “Pleasure doing business. I’ll be in touch.”
“That’s it? You needed to meet in person for that?” My brows touch my hairline. I have no clue why we couldn’t do this over the phone.
He’s already walking away, but he spins, walking backward. “You can’t tell the soul of a man if you can’t look in his eyes. I like to know who I’m doing business with.”
What the fuck does that even mean?
I watch as he sits on his bike, his arms sliding into his leather jacket, a cigarette dangling from his lips. The engine of his motorcycle purrs, and he salutes me before peeling out of the lot.
50
Alina
I stare at my reflection in the restroom mirror. My body is trembling from the extreme highs and lows I’ve experienced in the past hour. Dang, get it together, Lee.
I believe Chase when he says it wasn’t what it looked like. Maybe that makes me naive, I don’t know. What I do know is that he’s my forever. My soul recognized his from the moment we met. And he’s right. If I don’t trust him, what’s the point? Now that the shock has worn off, I can look at the scene objectively. I see how my mind was lost in memories of the past, skewing my vision.
Daddy is a whole different issue. Every
bone in my body wants to jump in a car and chase him down, but I know it won’t do me any good. I’m tired of being his punching bag, and after going to that meeting with Chase, I’ve realized as long as I’m there cushioning his fall, he won’t ever feel the pain. He has to hit rock bottom, and he needs to do it alone. But that doesn’t mean I’m not worried.
I need to tell Eli. Where the heck is he?
I splash water on my face to cool my cheeks and head back to the party. The last thing I want is to walk in there now that everyone’s seen Daddy at his worst—but I have no other option. I need to hunt down my brother.
I am not Daddy’s choices.
I take a deep breath and push open the doors, working my way through the crowd. Music thumps from the speakers, and there’s a group of people dancing in the middle of the room. My body instinctively wants to lose itself in the music—forget about everything that’s happened, but I keep my eyes on the prize.
I slink to a corner, hiding in the shadows while I scan the area for my brother. I find Sarah chatting with Sam and Anna, but Eli isn’t with her. The thought briefly flitters through my mind of asking her where he is, but something holds me back. I’m not sure she’d be any more in the know than I am.
“Were you ever gonna tell me?”
My breath lodges in my throat as I spin around. “Jax.”
His hands are in his pockets, a storm raging in the forest of his eyes. “Sweetheart, how long has he been this bad?”
“No. Don’t you look at me like that, Jackson Rhoades.” I point my finger in his face. “That right there is exactly the reason I never said anything. Ever since Mama died and Eli left, all I get is looks of pity from everyone in town. I can’t stand the thought of you lookin’ at me that way too.”
Jax rocks back on his heels. “But it’s me.”
A short laugh comes out with my breath. “That’s even worse.”
He flinches, and I struggle to find the words.
“Jax… I didn’t tell you because you woulda rode in on your white horse and saved the day. I didn’t want that. You already hold me up whenever I’m fallin’ down, and I knew, I knew that I couldn’t be enough for you.” I glance down, the sting burning me from my chest to my eyes. “I didn’t want you to know I wasn’t enough for Daddy, too.”
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