I suck in a stuttered breath and the dam bursts, years of waiting to hear the words he’s speaking form the tears that fall down my face. I bite my cheek to keep from interrupting.
“I don’t… hell, I don’t know what the hell I’m doin’. And it hurts to look at ya, Alina. You’re so damn like her. I don’t think I’ll survive if I stare at ya too long.”
“Pops,” Eli starts.
I reach over, putting a hand on his arm, letting him know it’s okay. Daddy’s just being honest. He’s not saying anything I didn’t already know.
Daddy shakes his head, gripping his mug tighter. “Anyway, Bud says I’m gonna be lookin’ at payin’ that family’s hospital bills, among other things, and that I’ll need to lawyer up.”
Eli pipes in again. “We’ve talked this morning and decided it would be in Pop’s best interest to check into a ninety-day rehab program. I’ve been in contact with one over the past few days. They have a spot for him.”
My stomach flips so hard it makes me lose my breath. Hope is a dangerous feeling. Eli’s been talkin’ to rehabs? A piece of my anger chips away.
“When?” I gasp out.
Eli’s face is serious. “Today. This afternoon. I had Pops pack a bag and we leave in…” He glances down at his wrist-watch. “Thirty minutes.”
I whoosh out a breath, overwhelmed. I never could have guessed this would be my morning. I gaze at Daddy, his head still hanging over his coffee cup, embarrassment, and shame circling the air around him. Then I swing my gaze to Eli. Even though things are rocky between us, I can’t help the gratitude that fills me. Because he’s here now. He’s helping. He’s present. And at the end of the day, he’s still my big brother.
“That’s real good, Daddy.” I try to grab his hand, but he jerks, moving it out of reach. My heart twists. These things take time, I guess.
Daddy doesn’t say anything else. The words “I’m sorry” never cross his lips. And while I long to hear them, I’m not surprised. We aren’t okay. We’re nowhere near healed. He has a lot to make up for, and I have a lot to forgive.
But for today, it’s enough.
Thirty minutes later, I watch them leave, knowing Daddy’s on his way into battle. I close my eyes and send up a prayer to God. And then I send one to Mama. I’ve been waiting on a miracle for years. Today feels like the perfect day to get one.
The breeze whips across my face, and I smile.
With a deep breath, I turn and walk away, heading back to Chase. To my love. To my future.
To the start of my happily-ever-after.
Epilogue
Journal Entry #423
Well, Doc. This is it. The last journal entry you’ll read of mine. Does it still count as an entry if I’m ripping out the page to mail to you? It doesn’t matter, I guess. It’s been a hell of a ride, eh? Maybe you think that way of all your clients. I’ll tell you one thing, my bank account is happy as hell that I’m no longer gonna be seeing you. And Goldi’s happy that I have no reason to go back to Nashville. Less chance of running into Marissa that way. Not that she’s been a problem ever since I threatened her with a restraining order.
Anyway, thanks for the recommendation of someone closer. Other than starting a new Nar-Anon chapter in Chattanooga, that was the last step to leave my old life behind and make Sugarlake really feel like home again. Home. Can you believe it? I can’t. A year ago, this all felt like a dream that was out of reach, and now we’re breaking ground on a house that I’ll get to build with my own two hands. One that Goldi designed from top to bottom. She’s still fucking perfect. Finally teaching dance at the studio that helped bring us together. I hope that one day I’ll be helping her build her own studio. She hasn’t told me that’s what she wants, but I see it in her eyes, and fuck, I want to give it to her. I WILL give it to her.
I’m proposing tonight. I’m nervous as fuck. Spent a million fucking years trying to pick out a ring. Another hundred trying to plan the perfect way to ask. I had a big celebration planned, invited everyone we love and even the ones we don’t. But I canceled it. Instead, I’m gonna take her out to the lake. The stars that always lit the path to her are gonna be the ones that illuminate her face as she tells me she’ll spend the rest of her life with me.
I can only fucking hope.
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference. Damn, those words have saved me more than once.
Also… since I won’t be seeing you again, I might as well tell you. That private investigator I hired a fucking year ago to look for Lily? He called today.
He found her.
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Beneath the Stands
Becca and Eli’s story is coming December 1st, 2020!
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Also by Emily McIntire
SUGARLAKE SERIES
Beneath the Stands (Becca & Eli) - December 1st 2020
Title TBA - Releasing Spring 2021
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Acknowledgments
I have so many people who deserve more than a simple line at the end of this book.
I want to thank my TRIBE: My girls who talk me down when I’m having a horrible case of imposter syndrome, let me vent about not wanting to change things I know need changed, and lifting me up on both my worst and best days. I love y’all so much and this book wouldn’t exist without you. The author version of Emily McIntire wouldn’t exist without you!
Sav R. Miller, Marissa Gramoll, Lee’Rain Jacquot, Greer Rivers.
To my beta readers: Lord have mercy, y’all are some angels. Thank you for reading my work (sometimes chapter by chapter) tearing it down and helping me rebuild it into the best version of itself. Chase and Alina deserve their story to be told in the most beautiful way, and it only happened because of you.
Anne Lucy-Shanley, Ashley Adams, Etta Easton, A.V. Asher, Lee’Rain Jacquot, Greer Rivers, Alison Butler, Clara Elroy, Marissa Gramoll, Sav R. Miller, Ariel Mareroa, Melissa Whitman, Clari Fernandez Mezzadra, Ellouise Liston
To my brilliant editor and proofreader at My Brother’s Editor: Thank you for making my words pretty and for dealing with my incessant need for over-communication. Ya’ll are the best and I’ll use you forever.
To my cover designer, Clarise: You’re amazing at what you do and I am beyond words at how you created a beautiful cover that captured the feel of Chase and Alina. Thank you.
To my graphic designer and lil’ sparkle, Annie: You are more talented than you know. Thank you for loving this story before you even knew what it was, and bringing it to life visually in a way no one else could have.
To the bloggers and bookstagrammers: Holy crap! Y’all are fierce, amazing supporters. I appreciate every second of your time and every ounce of your support. Thank you so much for loving books and the authors who write them.
To my mom, Cynthia and my step-mom, Mary Ann: Thank you for reading this while it was in its rough draft form and providing feedback and support!
To my extended family: Thank you for always being supportive. Sorry not sorry about the sex scenes.
To my husband, Mike––my real life book boyfriend. The one I base my happily-ever-after’s on. Thank you for being the most supportive husband and always pushing me to believe in my dreams. Thank you for taking on baby duty so I can
write, and not complaining once about the dirty dishes in the sink or the laundry I didn’t do while Chase and Alina were screaming in my head. (Thank you for also knowing that didn’t mean I wanted you to try and do laundry. THERE IS A SYSTEM AND YOU WILL RUIN IT!) I had to go through a lot of duds in my life to get to you. I love you.
To my daughter, Melody. Thank you for being such a good sleeper so Mommy could write while you were down. Thank you for training me to survive on zero hours of sleep so I could push through the tired nights and create this book. I hope one day you see my name on my books and know that you can do and be anything. The stars are the limit, baby girl.
And last (but definitely NOT least) To you. The readers. Thank you for taking a chance on a brand new author, and reading all the way through to the end of the acknowledgments. All of this is because of you. Every single second and every penned word. Thank you for letting me tell Chase and Alina’s story, and thank you for wanting to read it.
About the Author
Emily McIntire is an emerging author of New Adult, Contemporary Romance. A long time songwriter, and an avid reader, Emily has always had a passion for the written word, and a penchant for painful, messy, beautiful romance. After all, what's a Happily-Ever-After without a dose of angst?
When she's not writing, you can find her chasing her crazy toddler around or laying by her pool with a good book. She lives in Florida with her husband, daughter, and their dog, Braylon.
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