by Gun Brooke
“I just can’t figure out what he’s thinking about,” Annelie whispered.
“Who…oh. Your father.”
Annelie sighed. “Why didn’t he call or come see me? And why tell such obvious lies?”
“Probably thought you wouldn’t risk a scandal—you’d pay him off.”
“Or does he resent me?” Annelie’s voice was hardly audible as she inched closer, wrapping her arm around Carolyn’s chest. “Maybe my mother did or said something…or…maybe I did.”
Carolyn turned and looked at Annelie. “Don’t even go there. Nothing can justify what that man’s done. Nothing.”
“For a long time after he left, I blamed myself. I was afraid to ask my mother because she just made excuses for him. I thought he’d come back. When he didn’t, I knew it was my fault. You heard Margo yesterday. My mom was a saint.”
Carolyn turned over and hugged Annelie. “Listen. I’m sure your mother was wonderful. Just look at you, her daughter. But she couldn’t see your hurt or your guilt. And she hurt you by excusing the bastard. I’m sure she didn’t mean to. But nobody’s a saint. She was human, with her own faults and fears. What happened between your parents had nothing to do with you.”
“She never said a bad word against him.”
“Commendable, but I bet she said a few things in her mind. If she had an ounce of your fire, she did.”
“I owe it to him to take care of him now. Without him…”
“You don’t owe him anything, love. He threw it all away when he deserted you. Margo agrees with me. But it’s your decision. I’ll support you no matter what.”
“I know, Carolyn. I just can’t stop thinking about him. Maybe I somehow…” Annelie’s voice trailed off.
“Triggered this? Oh, Annie, of course not. Both of us have reevaluated our lives lately. We’ve taken a chance on each other against all odds, which gives past demons a great opportunity to dig their claws into us. Your father saw you on TV and decided to take a chance.”
“I wish I knew what to do.”
“Give it a few days, love.” Carolyn put her leg around Annelie’s hips, trying to wrap herself around her. “We’ll know more tomorrow. Here. Let me hold you.”
“Okay.” Annelie sighed. “Oh, Carolyn…” Burying her face in Carolyn’s hair, she finally began to relax again.
As she cursed the man who was harassing her lover, Carolyn slid her hands under Annelie’s T-shirt, feeling nothing but soft skin.
“There you go, just relax. That’s my girl.” Carolyn kept her voice a low purr, which seemed to work. Not caring how her arms ached, she talked her lover to sleep. After only a few minutes, Annelie slumped closer to her, her breath deepening. That’s right, love. Go to sleep. I’ve got you. Nobody will be able to hurt you while I’m here, guarding you. I love you so much. Carolyn inhaled deeply. I have to harness my anger toward this idiot or I won’t be much help to her. Holding Annelie close, she was determined to protect her.
*
Carolyn’s head ached, a dull foreboding pain, making her reach for her bag.
“Excuse me. I’ll be right back.” She rushed out of the room where she’d been sitting with Helen, Harvey, and several other actors, reading the first scenes.
In the privacy of the ladies’ room, she used her nasal spray, grimacing at how it stung but hoping it would stop the headache. Bile rose in her throat and she swallowed hard. While running cold water on her wrists, she noticed she was pale, but not gray and sweaty as happened during her worst attacks. Checking her watch, she was relieved to see it was almost noon.
When she returned, everyone was breaking for lunch. “Are you okay, Carolyn?” Helen looked concerned.
“I’m fine—just hungry, I guess. I…” Suddenly her phone rang, and Annelie’s name flashed on the display.
“Annie, what’s up?”
After a pause, her lover spoke. “Am I interrupting? I was hoping you were on your lunch break.”
“We’re just heading out.”
“I’m on my way to the office to talk to Margo. Could I swing by and pick you up?”
Carolyn thought she could detect a slight tremor in Annelie’s voice. “I’ve got an hour. Is that okay?”
“Should be. See you outside the studio in five minutes.”
“See you soon, love.”
Helen cleared her throat. “Carolyn, I couldn’t help but overhear. If you need more time, just call. We can work around you.”
Eying Helen suspiciously, Carolyn nodded. “Thanks. But I hate to be the diva on the first day.”
“Don’t worry about it, Carolyn.” Helen winked. “Go take care of your girl.”
*
Annelie sat in the middle of the couch, motioning for Carolyn to sit next to her. Margo sat down on her other side and clasped both of Annelie’s hands.
“What are you going to tell me?” Annelie whispered, her voice barely audible. “Please, Margo.” She felt Carolyn’s arm circle her waist.
“This isn’t easy,” Margo said, her voice serious. “I’ve waited until I was certain. I need to hold another press conference, and then our troubles will be over.”
“Then why are you looking at me like that? What did you find out?”
Margo’s stormy eyes were unreadable.
“Sweetheart, I’m afraid my news is good for everyone…but you.” Margo grasped Annelie’s arm. “Your father is dead.”
Chapter Fifteen
“What?” Annelie’s voice was emotionless.
“The man in California causing all this commotion isn’t your father. Stuart died almost five years ago.”
Grateful for her lover’s supporting arms, Annelie leaned back heavily against her.
“And who’s this idiot trying to pose as her father?” Carolyn demanded.
“We don’t know yet. We should have more details any minute.” Margo still held on to Annelie but let go when she got up and started pacing.
“So this man’s motive is money?” she said huskily. “And fame?”
“That’s as good a guess as any. Whatever he’s after, he’s not too smart. Your father had a record, so it’ll be easy enough to compare fingerprints.”
“How long have you suspected?” Carolyn leaned back against the couch, her eyes narrowing.
“Ever since I saw copies of Stuart’s mug shots. Remember, I knew Stuart for several years. Even if the TV footage fooled me, compared to your father’s mug shots…” Margo shrugged.
“So my father died and no one notified me,” Annelie said from where she stood over by the window. “He probably didn’t have anything that suggested he had a child somewhere.”
Carolyn rose to embrace Annelie. “We don’t know the circumstances yet, do we, Margo.”
“No. I hope the investigator lets me know something soon.”
Annelie looked down at Carolyn, noting her scowl. Suddenly she realized Carolyn was also pale and trembling. “You’re missing your lunch. Margo? Can you get Carolyn something to eat? She has to go back to work soon.”
“Sure. I’ll be right back.”
“Are you okay?” Carolyn rubbed her left temple. “This was quite a shock, for you, for all of us.”
“Yes. I don’t know what to think…or to feel.” Annelie raised her arms, hugging Carolyn closer.
“It’s normal to mourn, love.”
“Is it? He was gone all those years. Five of them because he was dead and I had no idea—and didn’t bother to find out, I guess.” Annelie swallowed hard. “And what was this imposter thinking?”
“Who knows? But the puzzling part is he knows enough about you to make his story somewhat credible.” Carolyn rubbed Annelie’s back with long, soothing strokes, then patted her. “It makes me furious,” she growled. “If I ever get a chance to give him a piece of my mind, I would—”
“Have to get in line, Carolyn. You’re not the only one. Once the news hits, Annelie’s friends are going to have to take a number to get a crack at him,” Margo said. “We’re in luck. Th
ey’d overordered from the coffeehouse down on the corner. Sandwiches and café latte.”
Carolyn had paled considerably after her outburst. Her hands shook as she reached for a mug of coffee, and small beads of sweat broke out on her upper lip. Annelie sat down on the couch and patted the spot next to her. “Join me?”
Carolyn nodded, taking another large gulp of coffee. “Oh, this is great. Thanks, Margo.” She bit into a turkey sandwich like she was starving.
“You’re welcome.”
They ate in silence, Annelie noticing how Carolyn’s color gradually returned. She seems to be feeling better now. Thank God. Annelie frowned slightly as she nibbled her sandwich. I don’t know what to think…or feel. He’s dead, but I still have so many unanswered questions. I used to think it didn’t matter, that I didn’t care. But I do. Why did he leave us? And now…who’s this man? What does he want? Everything has gone so fast I can’t keep up. She glanced up at Carolyn. Then again, I do know what I feel about her. That’s the only thing I’m sure of right now, and even that could blow up in my face. The questions whirled in her mind, leaving her feeling queasy.
“When we’re in the air is a great time for the press conference,” Carolyn said, wiping a daub of mustard from her face. “That way, we’re incommunicado when the press goes crazy, because they will. Now they’ll focus on this idiot instead of Annelie, but she’ll still be in the spotlight.”
“Oh, God,” Annelie murmured. “They’ll want to hear what I think about him, won’t they?”
Carolyn nodded. “Probably. They won’t give up until you make a statement, but you can still do it through Margo. Think about it for a day or two. You need time to find your bearings, love.”
She’s right. I feel like running as far away as I can. That old pattern. I’m numb, like icicles are hanging from my heart, my feelings in suspended animation. Well, maybe I won’t cut my losses and run, for a change. And then there’s you, Carolyn. You’re the only one who can reach me now. Everything else seems unimportant.
Annelie shook her head as if waking from a dream. “I’ll work on a statement later today. Now I might as well try to get some work done here at the office.”
“Good idea.” Margo nodded. “I’ll see if the investigator has come up with any more information.” Leaning forward, Margo kissed Annelie’s cheek. “Chin up, girlie. This’ll be all right. I promise.”
“Thank you. I know it will.” Annelie tried to sound convinced.
Carolyn slid closer after Margo left the room. “Need a hug?”
“Desperately.” Annelie rolled her eyes at herself but enjoyed feeling Carolyn’s strong arms encircle her.
“You’re so tense. I despise that jerk for doing this to you.”
“I’ll be fine. I just need to wrap my mind around it all. I’ve sometimes wondered if he was still alive, or…” Annelie shrugged, hiding her face against Carolyn’s shoulder. “It’ll take me a while to deal with this, I suppose.”
“Yes. And you know what? I’ll be right here to help you. We’ll get through it together, Annie. To quote Margo, my new hero, ‘I promise.’”
Annelie knew Carolyn didn’t make promises easily. “Thank you. I’m going to take you up on that.” She hesitated. “I need you so much.”
Carolyn paused, then continued to rub Annelie’s back softly. “Oh, Annie. I need you too. So very much.” She brushed Annelie’s hair with a soft kiss. “I don’t know how it happened, but you’ve become the most important thing in my life. I love you.”
Annelie felt her heart skip several beats, then instantly speed up and thunder almost painfully in her chest. A sudden heat spread through her chest, melting the ice that had encased it for the last few days. Tears formed in her eyes, and she didn’t mind Carolyn kissing them away as they rolled down her cheeks. “I love you too.”
Carolyn dug in her pocket for a tissue and handed it to Annelie, smiling tenderly at her. “Here. Blow your nose, love.”
As she felt her face grow warm, Annelie settled against the couch, still very close to Carolyn. “How long before you have to go back?”
“Ten minutes. Let’s just sit here and relax.” Carolyn smoothed Annelie’s mussed hair.
Ten minutes won’t be enough. I need hours. I need days alone with you, but this’ll have to do. Maybe I can make it until you come home from work. “Come closer, then.” She pulled Carolyn half on top of her. “Margo will make sure nobody disturbs us.”
Carolyn slipped her hands under Annelie’s silk blouse, spreading her fingers over her stomach, softly caressing the smooth skin. “I can’t stop touching you.”
“Good.”
“You don’t mind?”
“Of course not. I love your hands.”
Carolyn soothed a random pattern on Annelie’s soft skin.
Nuzzling Carolyn’s temples in return, Annelie felt a vein throb against her lips. This symbol of life pulsating in her lover comforted her. She traced the faint blue line with her tongue. “Mine,” she whispered in a barely audible tone. God, how could I ever let you go? Stay with me. Promise me…though I know I can’t expect such promises. Annelie closed her eyes, knowing she had to draw strength from this brief embrace, enough to last the rest of the day. Nothing else matters right now, this instant. Mine.
“Yes, love. Yours.”
*
Carolyn pulled the covers over Annelie’s naked shoulders, protecting her from the air conditioner’s breeze. Annelie had fallen asleep twice on the couch and stumbled to bed only after Carolyn made her.
“I’ll be right there,” Carolyn promised, as she tucked in her already-sleeping lover.
Walking into the bathroom, Carolyn shed her clothes with relief. The back of her neck ached from tension. She rolled her neck and her shoulders and tried to work it out. Running the water as hot as she could stand it, she slipped into the shower stall and closed her eyes as the massaging water hit her sore muscles.
The readings this afternoon went okay. Made sure nobody noticed I wasn’t on top of everything. The medicine and seeing Annelie helped that bitch of a headache. But that bastard who’s harassing her! Ow. Feels like a jackhammer in my head. Carolyn quickly opened her mouth and wiggled her jaw to alleviate the pressure.
Got to pull off my appearance with Leno when we get to L.A. And then make it through the Maddox convention Saturday. That’s it. No more commitments for me during the filming.
Carolyn had just walked into the bedroom when the phone rang. Snatching it, she moved toward the living room.
“Hello?”
“Annelie? Is that you, babe?”
“Carolyn Black speaking. Annelie can’t come to the phone right now. Who’s this, please?” Carolyn’s voice was somber.
“Carolyn? It’s Kitty McNeil. This is a surprise. How are you?”
Carolyn could detect a guarded tone in the woman’s voice.
“I’m fine, thanks. Annelie has had a rough day. She’s asleep and—”
“Oh, don’t wake her up. I can talk to her tomorrow. I’m just calling to see how she’s handling this thing with her father.”
Realizing how close Kitty and Annelie were, Carolyn uncharacteristically decided to confide in her.
“There’s been a surprising development, Kitty.” As Carolyn continued to disclose Margo’s earlier information, she appreciated Kitty’s colorful language about the imposter. “My thoughts exactly.”
“So what’s going to happen?”
“Margo’s holding another press conference tomorrow, while we’re flying to L.A. It’ll be great to have her straighten everybody out before the new Maddox convention starts.”
“I guess she’s really been upset. Is she okay?”
Carolyn was too tired to be anything but blunt. “She’s had a rough time. I’m staying here with her. In fact, she asked me to move in permanently, and since I don’t want to be away from her, the choice was easy.”
“Sounds great. Will you tell her I called? I e-mailed her but have been worr
ied about her and wanted to check.”
“Of course. Thanks for calling. She’ll probably give you a call in the morning before we leave. Or are you asleep then?”
“I’ll be awake. I’m keeping very strange hours working on my new novel.”
“Excellent.” Carolyn smiled. “Any chance of a preview? Remember, I’m an avid fan.”
Kitty laughed. “A preview? Well, don’t tell Jem…but of course. Just for you.”
Carolyn relaxed, finally feeling the connection she’d made with the author when she first met her and during their Disney World adventure. “I won’t tell on you, I promise. I look forward to it.”
“Cool! Now I know it’s bedtime at your end, so sleep well. Give Annelie a hug for me.”
“Will do. Take care.”
Finally tired and ready for bed, Carolyn padded back to the bedroom. Annelie was still fast asleep, hugging a pillow close to her chest, a faint frown on her forehead. Carolyn dropped her towel and climbed into bed and was immediately wrapped in a close embrace.
“You’re here…” Annelie whispered.
“Yes. Go back to sleep, love.” Carolyn placed her arms around the warm sleeping form next to her. “Shh, there you go.”
Closing her eyes, Carolyn listened to her lover’s even breathing and finally slept.
*
In the jet, Annelie looked at Carolyn next to her on a comfortable couch. She had her eyes closed, and Annelie knew she was focusing on her two upcoming performances. Farther to her left, Helen and the Davidsons were engaged in a muted conversation. Gregory sat toward the back of the plane with a laptop.
Though the Tonight Show producers had asked Annelie to appear with Carolyn, she had declined. She did, however, plan to accompany Carolyn to the studio.
Annelie checked her watch and took a deep breath, thinking about the press conference Margo was holding that very minute.
“You okay?” Carolyn asked, placing a hand on her lover’s arm. “Thinking about the press conference?”
“Yes. I wonder how it’s going. I feel bad for leaving Margo to handle it all.”