by A. K. Koonce
I can physically feel the exhale of her shuddering breath. Her blonde hair is now pale white, ghost-like but so knotted it looks like she’s tried to tear it right from her scalp.
“You will never leave this place,” she says to me through clenched teeth. The tight lips she speaks through are cracked and dry.
My stomach twists at the sound of her hateful threat, and I have to remind myself that she isn’t really here. And she isn’t speaking to me at all.
She’s just a memory.
“You will never have powerful magic like I have. In the surface world, you will never know love like I know. And you will die a miserable. Fucking. Death.” Her narrowed eyes look me up and down, painting me with the words she’s saying.
But who is she speaking to?
Her glare holds on me, and I notice instantly how much I look like her. The sharpness of her brow, her delicate frame, even the gleam that’s shining in her wet eyes, it’s all too familiar.
And then, she washes away with the next gust of wind.
The breath that hits my lungs is shaking, and it might be the first real inhale I’ve taken since I laid eyes on the vengeful, sorrow-filled woman.
“It was a promise for Liddell. He set up that cruel memory of her to haunt this forest, but I think she cursed him when she said all that,” Preston tells us quietly.
You will never have powerful magic like I have. In the surface world, you will never know love like I know. And you will die a miserable. Fucking. Death.
He said he loved her. Did he? Or did he trap her here until she was forced to escape? Did she ever really belong here to begin with?
At that thought, I fling my head up.
Cat arches an eyebrow at me, and Preston’s wise gaze never leaves my shocked expression.
“Can you take me to the door?” I ask him hurriedly. It’s a rush of syllables all running together, but the boy simply smiles slowly. He looks at me like I’m just now paying attention.
And maybe I am.
The smooth wooden door looks more worn than I remember it from last time. The metal gleams beneath the shining white light hanging above.
And then she smiles.
“I knew I’d see you again,” she whispers in the calmest voice that carries all around the small room the three of us are standing in.
She expected to see me again? Because I never imagined in a hundred Wonderland years that I’d ever step foot on Creatures’ Cliff ever again.
“I wanted to ask you some questions.” I take a step closer, and her metal symbol arches as if she’s studying me.
“I’m afraid I was created to ask questions, not answer them.” She repeats that line, and it’s like a blanket phrase that she uses for everyone.
It’s what she told me last time.
And I expected it this time.
“My grandmother was your creator.” I carefully say the words in a way that it’s a discussion, not a question.
“She was a beautiful woman,” Maisie reminisces all too sadly. “When Liddell got his hands on her, he stole all that beauty that shined in her eyes.”
My heart hurts as it fills my throat and makes it impossible to breathe or speak.
I push through the feeling and speak on the quietest voice. “He says he loved her.”
A weak, tired laugh slips through her shining down-turned mouth. “He loved her power. He loved the idea of her. He…he smothered her until she was a shell of a person. And he’ll do it all over again if he gets the chance.”
The light shines along her strange eyes when she looks up at me.
A single streaming tear slides along the wooden door. It trails along the cracks and the splinters, and I watch it until it hits the ground. It’s painful to see, and I hate that that fucking man did this to her. Even years after she’s gone.
His damage lasts generations. And I’m living proof of that.
“Leave, Madison. Walk through this door and never come back, my dear.”
Leave.
I could walk away from this mess and never look back.
But there’s no way, not in any magical realm, not in any version of Wonderland, that I could ever walk away from the men I love.
“I can’t.” I step back, and my foot scuffs over a pointed black stiletto, reminding me that I’m not alone in this. Smooth, warm fingers slip into mine, squeezing and sending a little bit of comfort at the feel of Cat’s hand holding mine.
She’s always been this fearless, resilient woman who’s been my friend when I didn’t even know I needed one. In this moment, I’m just like her.
Wonderland doesn’t need another woman to run away to find safety.
It needs fearlessness. It’s needs resilience.
And that’s exactly what I’m going to give them.
Six
Alixx
I don’t know what I expected of the sweet girl who stumbled into this place, but her landing sopping wet on her feet in this hiding hole isn’t it. She’s…seething. Her lips are pursed so hard together I think she might spit at me.
If there’s one thing I know, it’s pissed off women. I keep my distance, watching from the chair near the fire as Kais strides right to her as if she needs him.
She clearly doesn’t.
The fool.
His palm gently strokes along her arm, and when he leans in to coo at her, she’s already walking away.
The fool.
“Are you okay?”
Wait for it.
“I’m fine,” she says at the same time as I mouth her biting words I was waiting for.
Lighton takes a step back from her as she passes, his back hitting the wall, like the man might have more brains than I ever gave him credit for.
My gaze pans to the Profit who’s smiling like a proud teen dad. Kid’s never this happy. His happiness in her is interesting all on its own. Cat’s hips sway, and Brody’s palms are there as soon as she’s close enough, pulling her against him and letting her purr right into him like a common house cat.
He’s her fucking catnip, and he doesn’t even realize it.
If these men paused for a single second, they’d see what these women need from them.
Cat, she needs love.
And my not-so-innocent Madison, she needs support.
Not coddling.
Support.
“What are you planning, Sweetheart?” I stand, and with slowness, careful non-dominating slowness, I walk to her. “Tell me what you need, and I’ll do it.”
She turns away from the makeshift counter and the warm drink she was making for herself. Her big green eyes shift over my face. And I give her nothing but patient respect.
Pay attention, folks. That’s all women want. And I am an expert at fucking paying attention.
Her soft body curls into mine, her head resting heavily on my shoulder as her arms wrap around me like sweet acceptance that I’ve only ever felt with her. Ever so lightly, her fingers skim the underside of my wings, and my lashes flutter from the gentle feel of it.
A sigh slips from my lips, and I lean into her just as much as she’s leaning into me. Her exhaustion is apparent, and I feel how much she needs me. She just…needs to be held.
Just for a little while.
As I lift my arms to envelop her against me, I make sure to lift my hand and quietly extend my middle finger above my head to the men who I know are glaring hate messages into the back of my skull.
Their grumbles growl through the small space.
Fools.
“Nothing today. Tomorrow,” she vows. “I’ll need you tomorrow, Alixx.”
I thrum to life just from the rasping way she says my name.
She said she loves me. She said she needs me.
No one’s ever said those simple romantic things to me.
For the first time in my life, I believe it.
Seven
Kais
I’ve never been afraid of war. Mostly because it’s inevitable. It’s peace in life that�
�s unstable. It’s here one minute and gone the next. And I just know that the peace I have with Madison, it’s teetering, preparing to fall, and ready to blaze up into a wrath of a war that I can’t even imagine.
Gliding footsteps ripple the waves that are washing in across my feet. I sit on the rocky shore, watching the hinting rose colors of the sunrise. My arms stay resting casually on my bent knees, but I can feel her attention on me.
When I look up, the sky’s soft shades of pink and crimson highlight her deep red hair. It’s her smile that makes me weak though.
Yeah. That peace that we have is going down hard.
I can feel it.
“Why are you out here alone?” she whispers.
Her small body brushes along mine as she takes a seat at my side, letting the white waves rush up to her bare feet just as they are mine.
“Preston called it a hole. It’s definitely a hole. And it’s too fucking small for all the people down there.” I’m complaining, but I’m also leaning into her, my arm trailing down her back before setting on the ground behind her. My chest brushes her shoulder, and she looks up at me with a smile kissing her perfect lips.
She’s smiling.
And she’s planning a war today.
Even if she hasn’t admitted that little fact out loud.
My head tilts toward that alluring smile, and my mouth is so close to hers I’m breathing her in just as her lashes flutter closed.
“Do you ever think you’ll leave this place?” she asks suddenly.
My eyebrows lift.
I slowly pull back as too many memories drift into me.
“No,” I say quietly.
The water sloshes in, and the heat of the sun warms me even as chilled thoughts seep into my mind.
“Never?” She angles her head down, trying to veer into my line of sight that’s held intently on those crashing, damming waves.
“I left my life for a reason, Madison.” The clipped words sound harsher than I intend, and my eyes close at how easily anger flares up inside of me. “Sorry,” I whisper.
“You’re not that person anymore, Kais. You’re not an addict. You’re not someone who needs anything or anyone else to get through the day. You’re…you’re so strong.” Her small hand slips over my bicep, and it hurts me to even consider being honest with her.
Fully, completely, painfully honest.
“In a war, people die. Not just in a battle but in your hometown where life is normal and people are happy. My parents died in a housefire while I was gone. I didn’t know until after.” I don’t look at her as I speak, but her hold on me tightens like she’s trying to reach me even though I’m right beside her. “People move on with their lives, and the world keeps turning. Even if you’re not there to see it. After the war, too much had changed. I had changed. The drugs helped my leg, but it didn’t help my mind. And my mind—it was a fucking mess, Madison. It went on like that for a long, long time.” Her small body presses against me, her arms wrapping around me, and I just close my eyes and force myself to tell her. “I leapt into the sea, off a jagged cliff in the middle of the night. Not in hopes of finding a magical land, but in hopes…of finding peace. For once.”
She said I was strong, but I don’t feel it. I feel beaten down. I feel tired. I feel...too much on most days.
Soft lips graze the edge of my jaw, and I don’t realize how bad my hands are shaking when I lift them. It scares me so much that I push them through her thick hair, and it’s a reckless kiss that I press to her lips over and over and over again. And she lets me lose my emotions in her.
The feel of her soft lips pliable beneath mine settles the reckless pound of my heart. I lean into her a little more and a little more until her soft body pressed against mine turns that anxiety into lust without even trying.
It happens fast; without even realizing it, I’m fully against her, shoving at her night shirt, pushing aside her panties, and thrusting inside her in a matter of seconds.
A gasp tears from her lips as I groan into her. Her tight pussy takes every hard inch of me, and she rocks her hips perfectly with each pounding thrust I give her. There’s no sweetness to it, no gentle finesse. It’s all sharp teeth and sharper nails biting into each other with more force than the sliding waves that caress our writhing bodies. Her slickness glides along my shaft just right, like she understands what I need even if I don’t understand myself.
I fuck her until the memories and the thoughts wash away with the lapping sea, and when I bury myself in her with a hard groan and consuming pleasure pulsing through my cock, I hate myself for how clean I feel now. My lips part on a harsh breath as I come inside her so hard it feels like fire is sparking through my entire body.
Gentle fingers brush softly through my wet hair.
When my lashes slowly open, she’s looking up at me with the most serene look on her angelic face. God, she looks sweet. The ocean waves no longer sound crashing but calming. My heartbeat is pounding, but it’s not filled with violence. The world isn’t terrible.
Not with Madison Torrent wrapped around me.
Eight
Madison
“So you’re allowed to pass among Kingdoms whenever you like?” I settle my gaze on his bright eyes, and Preston nods with ease like it isn’t amazing and ridiculous all at the same time that he gets special treatment.
All these people are residing in a prison-like Kingdom, and this kid’s over here advancing to GO and collecting two hundred dollars whenever he likes.
He leans back in the little arm chair, and most of us linger there around him and the flickering warmth of the fire.
“As long as I’m in Liddell’s good graces, I’m welcome in his Kingdom. I’m…valuable to him.”
“Why?” Kais asks from his spot, leaning against the wall of the dimly lit cave.
The scent of salt water still clings to my hair from this morning, and my body thrums internally just from the sound of his deep voice.
“Because I can reach her. Even in death, he doesn’t leave her alone.” Preston’s gaze shifts to the floor, and a pain streaks through me at the thought of Liddell haunting Maisie even after she’s gone. I shove the thought down and try to focus.
“Lighton had special abilities when he was granted access between the Kingdoms. How do the shadow men make it beyond the barriers?” I ask, my brow scrunching as I try to get my plan connected, but it just logically isn’t linking together the way I see it in my head.
“Shadow men aren’t corporeal. For the most part, the magic they’re under the influence of is stolen from blessed breeze bats,” Preston explains, but none of those words really make much sense together.
“Breeze bats?”
Lighton glances my way and seems to be paying attention for the first time this morning. “On Creatures’ Cliff, there are smoky bats that turn invisible when the wind blows.”
What in the invisible bat fuck?
An uncontrollable shiver shakes through me at that thought.
Y’all need to leave Creatures’ Cliff the fuck alone, is what it sounds like.
“So you just have to be invisible to slip past? Doesn’t the majority of Wanderlust’s society have that ability if they’ve been there a while?”
“Well, the bats are blessed,” Lighton mumbles as I cut him a more confused look than I’ve ever given anyone.
He blinks at me like it’s obvious. I blink at him like it’s obviously not.
“What?” I finally ask slowly.
Lighton shrugs his big shoulders.
Preston cuts into my line of sight. “The bats were Maisie Torrent’s favorite creature in Wonderland because they kept her company in the evenings when she hid from everyone else. She said they always ate the nasty parts of this world, and she wished she had the ability to have that much power. She blessed them with the last of her powers before she left. No matter how much the Elders use the bats for their powers, the creatures will never die. They’re too strong to ever be harmed by the Elder
s ordinary kind of magic. Hence the ability to cross the barrier.”
These bats are powerful…
But…
“So it’s not the bats that are powerful. It’s her magic.” I blink at that understanding.
Preston’s smile turns eerie as he nods to me.
And finally, my plan comes together.
It’s too dark, and I’m tired of being chilled by the eeriness of nature. Moonlight flickers in through the thick leaves overhead, and we trail steadily along the quiet side of the Kingdom. The fewer of us who leave the hiding hole, the better.
So naturally every one of my men decided they should go.
They’re protective. Idiots. Protective idiots.
Cat, Brody, and Preston were smart enough to lie low. Or maybe they just wanted a bit more space to themselves for a few hours in the overcrowded cave.
“You’re sure the barrier isn’t monitored here?” Kais glances back at Lighton, and his golden hair shifts as he nods to the serious soldier.
“Sure as shit,” Lighton practically sing songs.
I pause to process that he said that correctly. My fingers flit through his just lightly, bringing his attention to me for a single second. His smile is soft, but I can tell he’s just as on edge as Kais and Alixx are.
He just shows it differently. Even Lighton’s nervousness is carefree.
I don’t know how he does that.
Kais’s emotions all default to edged aggression, but I can tell I’m wearing on him. There’s a softer side beneath all of that waiting anger. Too bad the rest of the world just never sees it. Because his sweeter side is mine.
And a selfish part of me loves that.
Alixx, he’s so watchful that his attention seems to zero in when he’s anxious or cautious. Like he is now. Every rustling leaf gets a second glance from his gleaming eyes. It’s like he’s waiting for a reason to kill something. But that flawless stride of his doesn’t say that at all. On the outside, he’s all sarcastic amusement. But if you linger long enough to really look at him—the way he’s looking at me.