by K. C. Lynn
I drop my forehead on hers, my eyes squeezing shut at the pain lancing through me. “I love you too, Cupcake.”
“Are we okay?”
My eyes snap open, and I stare into her warm, heartbroken eyes. “I’m trying, Grace. It’s hard but I’m fucking trying. Just know we’re okay. We’re always okay.” She wraps her arms tightly around my neck. I pull her in close and kiss the side of her head, the sweet smell of her hair penetrating my senses. “We’ll get through this.”
She leans back, tears spilling down her cheeks. “I just need you. As long as I have you, I can get through anythin’.”
“You have me. Always.” I take her lips; losing myself in a sweetness I crave every day, one I need to survive and one I refuse to live without.
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
Grace
After dropping the kids off at school Monday morning, Sawyer and I sit across from Dr. Schaefer in her office as she fills us in on how the procedure will happen and the post care. My fingers have been linked with his the entire time, as I feel both nervous and guilty, knowing he’d rather be any place but here. Even if he has come to respect my decision, I know he doesn’t like it.
“Any questions so far?” she asks after she finishes explaining.
Before I can speak up Sawyer does. “To be honest, Doctor, I don’t really give a shit how the procedure is done or how often you do it. All I care about is that my wife comes out of it in the same shape she went in. I want to know she will make a full recovery because I refuse to accept anything else. And trust me, you don’t want to deal with me or the repercussion if she doesn’t.”
Oh god… Did he really just threaten her?
My eyes close in embarrassment and I swallow thickly, waiting for her to call security and have him removed. Instead, when I open my eyes I see an understanding smile on her face.
“I understand your concern, Mr. Evans, and although I can’t guarantee you a hundred percent, I do give you my promise that I will do everything in my power to make sure both she and Lucy come out to live long and healthy lives.”
“Just make sure it happens and we’ll be fine,” he says, his tone hard.
I decide now is a good time to change the subject. “Does Lucy know yet?”
She shakes her head. “No. I waited like you wanted. I’ll let you be the one to tell her.”
“Thank you. How soon will this be scheduled?”
“I could book you in as early as Friday.”
“Four fucking days?” Sawyer bellows, making me flinch.
“Sawyer, please,” I say, trying to calm him.
“We haven’t even told our kids yet. We’ve barely had enough time to come to terms with this ourselves.”
“As I said that’s the earliest I could get you in,” Dr. Schaefer says calmly, ignoring his outburst. “If that’s not good then we can find another date. However, time is of the essence where Lucy is concerned.”
“I understand. Maybe if it’s all right we can get back to you on that?” I ask. “I need to make sure I have everything together at home and work first.”
“Of course. Let me know as soon as you can.”
“I will,” I agree quietly. “Is it okay if I see Lucy now? I’ve been anxious to see her again.”
“I know she would love to see you again, too. She told me all about your last visit with her,” she says with a smile. “You remember where her room is?”
“Yes,” I answer, standing.
“Just double-check with the nurse before going in.”
“I will, thank you, Dr. Schaefer. I’ll call you as soon as I have my schedule figured out.”
She shakes my hand then reaches out for Sawyer’s. It takes him a moment before he finally accepts it. “I promise your wife is in good hands, Mr. Evans.”
His only response is a nod, which I guess is better than nothing. Once we walk out of her office I turn to him, my heart breaking at his expression. I step closer and wrap my arms around his waist. “I love you,” I tell him, not knowing what else to say.
I feel him release a deep breath. “I love you too, Cupcake.”
“You don’t have to meet her today if you don’t want to. I can go by myself,” I offer softly.
“Of course I’m going to meet her, Grace. Where you go, I go.” He leans down, sealing his words with a kiss, and it eases the heaviness in my chest.
“Okay, come on.” I lead him to the elevator, taking us to the third floor. Stepping out, I head up to the nurses station. “Excuse me, is Lucy Weston able to have visitors at the moment?”
“And you are?”
“Grace Evans…her sister,” I say, feeling a little awkward.
She frowns at me before looking down at the sheet in front of her. “Oh yes, I see your name down here on the list. Now would be a fine time to see her. Her parents just stepped out but Piper is with her.”
Relief fills me, knowing my father isn’t here. “That’s great.”
The nurse leads us over to the sink first so we can wash our hands then taps on Lucy’s door before opening it. “Miss Lucy, you have some visitors.”
“I do?” I hear her soft, frail voice from where I stand behind the nurse.
“Yes, ma’am.” The nurse moves to the side, allowing her to see who it is, and the smile that lights up Lucy’s pale face has my heart swelling with love.
“Grace, you came back.”
“Of course I did.”
Piper stands from her spot next to the bed, wiping her eyes, a small smile gracing her face, too.
“Hi, Piper,” I greet her.
“Hi, Grace. Good to see you again.”
“You, too.” I look back at Lucy. “I’ve brought someone with me that I want y’all to meet.” Grabbing Sawyer’s hand, I pull him behind me as I enter the room.
Both Lucy’s and Piper’s eyes go wide and their heads crane back as they stare up at him.
“Piper, Lucy, this is my husband, Sawyer. Sawyer, this is…Piper and Lucy,” I introduce nervously, refraining from saying sisters. I’m not sure how they would feel about it.
“Hey, girls, nice to meet you.”
They continue to stare at him, mouths open. Piper clears her throat, getting her wits about her first. “Nice to meet you, too.”
Lucy remains silent until her eyes finally find mine. “He’s your husband?” she asks in disbelief. I nod, biting back a smile. “Dang, you’re lucky.”
Her response makes me chuckle and of course adds to Sawyer’s already oversized ego. “Ah, I see you’re beautiful and smart,” he says, laying on the charm.
I roll my eyes, but a huge blush overtakes Lucy’s face, along with a smile. “Most people say brilliant but we can go with smart.”
Piper chuckles, as does Sawyer, and it makes my heart soar because it’s the first one I’ve heard from him since telling him about Lucy.
“Have a seat.” She gestures to the chair on the other side of her bed, opposite of Piper.
Sawyer sits first then pulls me down on his lap. Piper remains standing and looks around uncertain. “I can leave if you want some time alone?”
I wave her away. “Of course not. You can stay.”
With a nod she sits back in her chair.
“So how are you feelin’?” I ask, taking Lucy’s hand, noticing how cold it feels. I also notice the dark circles around her sunken eyes look more prominent.
She shrugs. “Pretty much the same, which I guess isn’t a bad thing.”
Piper looks over at her, her expression telling me that’s not necessarily true. Which she confirms a second later. “Her red blood cell count has decreased drastically.”
Lucy glares at Piper. My heart hurts not only at hearing that but that Lucy tried protecting me from it.
“I’m sorry,” I whisper, giving her hand a gentle squeeze.
She shrugs. “It’s fine. I’m thinkin’ I should just become a vampire, start sucking people’s blood and get my fix that way,” she says, trying to play it off as a jo
ke when there’s nothing funny about it. “Anyway, enough about me. Tell me about you. What’s new? Where are your babies? What pies are you making today?”
I swallow thickly, and do my best to paste a smile on my face as she tries to change the subject. “Well, my babies are at school. The pies I plan on makin’ will most likely be tomorrow, and I just got back from a quick visit to my in-laws in Colorado.”
“Colorado?”
I nod. “Yeah, that’s where Sawyer grew up.”
“Do they all look like him?” she asks, making me smile.
“I wouldn’t know. I don’t notice anyone else but him,” I answer honestly.
“Damn straight,” Sawyers affirms, his grip tightening on my hips.
“Hmm, that was sweet,” she whispers, exhaustion suddenly evident in her voice.
“Actually, I have some news for you,” I tell her, unable to wait any longer.
“Let me guess. He’s got a brother my age?” she asks, trying to keep the mood light.
I shake my head.
“Dang!”
“Lucy,” I say her name quietly and give her hand a gentle squeeze; wanting her to see how serious I am right now. “The results came back.”
She and Piper tense, both of their eyes locking on mine. I feel Sawyer’s forehead fall on my back but his hands give my hips a reassuring squeeze.
“Oh?” she says, looking terrified.
“I’m a match.”
“You are?” Her breath hitches, hope lighting her eyes.
I nod. “Yeah. I just finished meeting with Dr. Schaefer and we’re working on fixin’ a time for the surgery. I’m gonna do it. I’m gonna be your donor.”
Before I can even finish the words she covers her face with her hands as a sob escapes her. Piper’s head falls on Lucy’s shoulder as she releases her own emotion.
“I told you, you don’t have to,” she cries.
Tears spill down my cheeks as I struggle to hold my composure. Sawyer wraps his arms around me, holding me close.
I grab her hand and pull it back from her face. “I know I don’t have to, but I want to. In my heart, Lucy, I know it’s the right thing. I know God intended for us to meet. I just found you and Piper, I don’t want to lose y’all.”
She tugs me to come closer. Getting up off Sawyer, I lean over and let her hug me. “Thank you. I would have accepted your decision no matter what and still loved you, but thank you for giving me a chance at life again.”
The emotion I’ve been holding in explodes from my chest as I hug her back tightly. Piper joins in, awkwardly trying to wrap her arms around both of us. As we all share this heartbreaking yet hopeful moment, I know I’ve made the right decision. I know God has led me here to them.
The sound of the door opening breaks us of our moment. I spin around to see my father and Barbara enter the room. They both stop in their tracks at the sight of us.
“Grace, I didn’t know you were here,” Barbara says, looking over at Sawyer nervously.
“She’s a match!” Piper blurts out before I can say anything, “She’s going to be Lucy’s donor.” She slams a hand over her mouth and looks over at me apologetically. “Sorry.”
“It’s fine.” I smile, wiping the tears from my cheek.
“Oh thank God.” Barbara flings herself at me with a sob. “Thank you! From the bottom of my heart, thank you for giving my baby another chance,” she cries.
“You’re welcome,” I whisper, hugging her back. Glancing up, I see my father lookin’ at us with tears in his eyes. I quickly dart my gaze to the floor, still not ready to deal with him quite yet.
Remembering Sawyer is in the room, I step back from Barbara and introduce them. I don’t bother with my father since they already know each other and I know Sawyer’s reception will not be welcoming.
“Nice to meet you, Sawyer.”
“You, too,” he says, shaking her hand. His greeting isn’t as friendly as it was to Piper and Lucy but it’s at least nicer than it was to my father.
“Well, we should go and let you rest,” I say, turning to Lucy. “But I’ll be back soon and let you know when the date has been scheduled.”
She nods, a big smile brightening her face. “Sounds good. Maybe I could meet Parker and Hope soon.”
The thought of having to tell them about this breaks my heart, yet it warms when I think about Lucy and Piper meeting them. “Yeah, I’m sure we can work something out.”
I take Sawyer’s hand and am about to leave when Lucy grabs his arm, stopping him. She stares up at him, her expression somber. “Thank you for letting me have a piece of your wife forever.”
He nods, smirking down at her, but I don’t miss the tick of his jaw or the way his throat bobs. “Now you’ll be even more special.”
His words send my heart into a tailspin and brings on a fresh wave of tears. Raising her hand he kisses the top, close to where her IV is. “It was nice to meet you, Lucy.”
“You, too,” she whispers back.
After a good-bye to Piper and Barbara we walk out of the hospital room, never making eye contact with my father. I turn to Sawyer in the hallway, hugging him tight. “Do you understand now?” I ask, looking up at him with tears flooding my cheeks.
My heart shatters when I see his eyes red and glassy. “Yeah, Cupcake. I understand. Tell the doctor to book Friday. We’ll tell the kids tonight and I’ll make sure everything is taken care of.”
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
Sawyer
The fear of the unknown washes over the kids’ faces as Grace tries explaining to them who Lucy is and what she plans to do to help her.
“Is it gonna hurt you, Mama?” Hope asks, her lip trembling.
I watch Grace swallow, struggling to get words out, so I cut in. “Come here, Shortcake.” Picking her up, I bring her on my lap. “Mama won’t feel it. She’ll be asleep and when she wakes up the doctor will give her medicine so it doesn’t hurt. But when she comes home we’ll have to be really careful around her and help her get better, okay?”
She nods at me then looks over at Grace. “I’ll take really good care of you, Mama.”
Grace reaches out and strokes her cheek. “I know you will, baby girl. Don’t worry, I’ll be better in no time and we’ll get back to our bakin’. In the meantime, you think of more creations for us, okay? The bakery will need it.”
“No problem. I got this,” she says.
“I thought you didn’t have any family,” Parker says, his tone accusing.
“Well, I do, but some of them aren’t very nice so I don’t have a relationship with them. I just met Lucy and Piper and they’re wonderful. They really want to meet y’all. Maybe we can go for a visit and—”
“I don’t want you to do it,” Parker interrupts. Fear and anger—the same feelings I’ve struggled with—written all over his face.
“Honey, come here.” Grace pulls him closer, bringing him to stand in front of her where she sits on the sofa next to me. “I know this seems scary, but everything will be okay. Lucy needs me right now.”
“Why can’t someone else do it?”
“Because I’m the only one who can. Lucy and I share a very rare blood type. I’m all she has. If I don’t do this, Parker, she could die. It’s very serious.”
“What about us?” he asks, his eyes filling with tears no matter how hard he tries fighting them back. “I don’t want anything to happen to you. I can’t live without you, Mom.” When a sob rattles from his small chest, Grace pulls him in for a hug.
“Mama could die?” Hope cries.
“No, your mom isn’t going to die,” I grind out; feeling like someone poured fucking acid down my throat. “Listen, guys, everything is going to be okay. Mom is going to help Lucy and we’re going to help her, but we need to be strong. Can you do that?”
All I get are sniffles and nods, including from Grace.
“I love you, Mama,” Hope says, leaning over to wrap her arms around Grace’s neck. Parker wraps his around both of t
hem.
With an excruciating breath, I pull all three of them in and hold them close.
I’ve never felt so fucking helpless in all my life.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
Grace
“Good girl, now carefully drizzle the caramel over top.”
I stand behind Hope at our kitchen island, helping her pour the ingredients into the crust for the pie we’re making to bring to Lucy tonight. It was her creation, and it’s a beautiful one. It warmed my heavy heart.
The kids didn’t go to school today. We kept them home since last night was so emotional on everyone. They even slept with Sawyer and me, they didn’t want to leave me, and I didn’t want to be away from them either. I haven’t been able to swallow past the permanent lump that has formed in my throat since telling them.
I know I’m doing the right thing but it doesn’t make it any easier. My heart is shattered knowing how much I’m hurting my family.
The last people on earth I’d ever want to hurt.
When making this decision, I had been thinking about Lucy and how I needed to help her any way I could. Of course I thought about my family too, especially what I would do if they had Lucy’s condition. However, after last night I’ve been thinkin’ more about the risks to myself and what would happen if something does goes wrong.
Who will take care of them if something happens to me? Who will bake pies with Hope? Or make sure Parker gets all the hugs and kisses he deserves. Would Sawyer remarry?
These thoughts leave me heartsick.
They’re all things I can’t stop thinking about and I’m terrified. I’m trying to be strong though and not show it. Not only because I don’t want to worry the kids but also because I know this was a choice I made. It’s not fair to dump my fears on Sawyer when I know he’s struggling with this himself. So I’ve vowed to keep this locked inside as best as I can and be strong for my family. It’s the least I can do.
“I sure hope Miss Lucy likes my creation.”
With a smile I put the warm pot back on the stove. “I’m sure she’ll love it. She’s really excited to meet you and Parker, so that in itself will make her happy.”