by Nikki Wild
“See you tomorrow, Maise,” I said, turning around and leaving her alone in her office. I’d taken a few steps before I turned around again. She didn’t see that I was looking, but she was cradling her head in her hands and I felt a sharp pang of something I didn’t recognize.
Something serious had happened to Maisey. Something painful. I wasn’t quite sure how I fit in to that, but I knew it had something to do with me. Because every time she looked at me, it was as if she was seeing a ghost from her past that she didn’t want to see.
It didn’t make any sense. But whatever it was, I was determined to make her want me again.
My phone rang as I was sitting out on the balcony of my penthouse, watching the orange sun set in the distance. When I saw it was Coach Fox, I answered it.
“Hey Will,” I answered.
“How’s the knee, Colorado?” he asked.
“Still sucks. Swollen, painful, and really fucking ugly. The bruises have turned a really gnarly combination of green and purple now.”
“Well, that car fucked you up pretty good. Have you tried walking on it without the crutches yet?”
“For about half a second, then I’m reminded what an awful idea that is.”
“Well, make sure you don’t miss any physical therapy appointments. We don’t have any time to waste. I don’t want to tell you what’ll happen if you aren’t ready by September.”
“Well, then don’t. I’ll be better,” I replied. Not getting better wasn’t a fucking option, and I wasn’t about to even talk about it as a possibility. I wasn’t about to let some snot-nosed texting kid sideswipe my entire career.
“I hope so, Colorado, we’re counting on you,” Will said.
“I won’t let you down, Coach,” I replied before hanging up.
Yeah, I’d get better in three months. Well enough to play at least. That was plenty of time. But for some reason, football wasn’t really the most important thing on my mind right now. The thought of only spending three months with Maisey didn’t seem like near enough time for me.
I might have failed today, but tomorrow is another day. I was determined to pull out all the stops, not letting up until I had Maisey exactly where I wanted her.
As I lay in bed alone later, I couldn’t help but think that where I wanted her was right there beside me, under me, on top of me, in my arms…
If my usual methods didn’t work, I’d just have to pull out the heavy artillery.
Either way, she was going to be mine.
At the very least, for one more night.
12
MAISEY
I woke up the next morning thinking about secrets.
I’d always told Maddy that keeping secrets would only hurt the person keeping the secret. I’d told her that it was best to share things, get them off your chest, to keep the energy flowing freely inside of your heart.
Maybe it was some hippie bullshit, or maybe it was just my own guilt eating away at my scarred and battered conscience. But either way, I didn’t want her to turn out like me.
My secret was big. But it was mine. I’d held it close to my chest for so long, it had become a part of me. I’d never told a soul and I wasn’t about to start spilling things now.
But goddamn, did I ever feel the need for some relief.
Relief was out of the question, though.
It’s not like I could trust anyone with the truth.
It’s not like I could expect anyone to keep their mouth shut once they learned how big it was.
They’d be able to sell my secret to the highest bidder. They’d fall over themselves to ruin everything I’d built here.
I guess I could have sold it myself and ran away from it all, but the last thing I wanted to do was drag myself through the mud like that.
I hadn’t even told Eddie, my best friend in the whole damn world. As much as I loved Eddie, I knew how much he loved to gossip. He'd been an amazing friend, a wonderful kind of ‘uncle’ to Maddie, and brought a lot of much needed happiness and color to our lives.
By day, he was Eddie Rockwell, a loving gay man with a heart of gold, but at night, he turned into an entirely different person — Rockie Montaigne, the Queen of the Denver drag scene. He emcee’d drag shows at Charlie’s downtown every Friday and Sunday night and was very well-known and well-loved in the Denver community.
I’d met him a few years ago when I was still in school, doing my clinicals at another PT clinic. Eddie had fallen while dancing in a pair of stiletto’s and hurt his knee. I was assigned to him and a fast friendship formed. He and Maddy adored each other.
But still, I never told him my secret either.
My mouth remained firmly shut, my secret locked deep inside of me, never to see the light of day.
Everyone had something, right? Something they never told anyone? Something they took to the grave with them? I was no different.
At least that’s what I told myself so I could sleep at night.
Everyone had secrets. I wasn’t any different. It was perfectly normal to keep this to myself.
And if it wasn’t normal, then it was certainly necessary. Some things are best left unsaid, and my secret was one of those things.
And if I didn’t want to answer Jesse’s questions, I damn well didn’t have to. I didn’t have to tell him why I left. I didn’t have to tell him why I stood him up. Maybe I owed him an explanation, but he wasn’t about to get one.
At least not the real one.
I’d been so lost in my own thoughts this morning, that I’d almost let Maddy out the door without her inhaler. That would have been a nightmare, because I would have been forced to leave work and come back home to pick it up and then drive it back to her school. Instead, I found myself chasing after the bus two blocks, frantically yelling and waving behind it like a lunatic until it had finally stopped and let me on.
I made my way to work afterwards, determined to clear my mind and not let myself get distracted any longer. I needed to stay clear-headed and keep my cool.
And I was doing so good, until Larry walked into my office after I’d only been there for five minutes and ruined everything.
“You’re going to want to take that coffee to go,” he said, gesturing to the steamy mug on my desk.
“What are you talking about?” I asked.
“Your patient isn’t feeling well. He requested that you do an in-call treatment.”
“Which patient?” I asked, knowing exactly who he was talking about but hoping I was wrong.
“Colorado, of course. Your only patient.”
“For fuck’s sake, Larry!” I exclaimed. Yeah, I’m not supposed to complain, but this was too much.
“I don’t see the problem, Maisey. He doesn’t live far from here. I’ll pay for your gas and parking, if that’s your problem. Time and a half pay for having to leave the office.”
“That’s not it!”
“Well, then what?” he asked.
“If he’s not feeling well, then why do I have to go to his home to be exposed to whatever he has?”
“His leg injury isn’t contagious Maisey. He’s hurting too much to walk, but we both know he can’t afford to miss a day of therapy.”
“I can’t believe this,” I muttered, shaking my head and gathering my things. “What’s his address?”
“He lives in a penthouse at Spire,” he said.
“Of course he does,” I rolled my eyes. Spire is the most luxurious high-rise in Denver, of course he lives there.
“I gotta say, Maisey. I’m surprised you aren’t more excited about this. It’s a great opportunity for you. He could be a really great reference for you, and for the company. If we can get Mr. Colorado back on his feet, we might end up doing physical therapy for his entire team. We’re talking about a substantial increase in business, and don’t think I won’t remember who helped make that happen. We’re talking about a big raise for you… Plus, you get to hang out in his penthouse. I hear the view is amazing.”
�
�Lucky me,” I sneered, grabbing my coffee and walking out of my office.
Jesse had upped the game. I knew he wasn’t hurting too much to crutch his way in here. He was just using that as an excuse to get me all alone. He was still trying to wear me down.
But he had another thing coming if he thought he could do that.
I was strong. I was resilient. I’d gone this long without letting a man, any man, steer me off course. I wasn’t about to let some jock come in and ruin everything, no matter how he made me feel…
13
JESSE
“The distributions will go out first thing Monday morning.” My accountant, Harlan Harrison sat across from me at my kitchen table. My crutches were leaning against it, and I was already so sick of seeing them that I wanted to throw them off the balcony.
“Make sure Samantha includes the letter I wrote when she sends out the checks,” I replied, just as the door bell rang. “Get that, will you Harlan? It’s probably my physical therapist.”
“Of course,” he rose and opened the door, greeting a very pissed off, albeit very adorable, Maisey. I was delighted to see her hair was down today, the curls I remembered so well bouncing around her head in an unruly mess. I imagined sinking my fingers into them, and pulling her head back, my lips capturing hers in a passionate kiss. I wanted to smell them, touch them, feel them sliding through my fingers.
“Maisey, thanks for coming,” I said from the table. “Please come in. This is Harlan, my accountant.”
“Hello,” she said, smiling politely, despite the anger rolling off of her. She still had that small town girl in her. She’d never be rude to someone needlessly, no matter how pissed off at me she was. “Nice to meet you.”
“Likewise,” Harlan said, before turning back to me. “Besides the Children’s Heartlink Foundation disbursements, is there anything else we need to go over, Jesse?”
“You tell me, you’re the accountant, Harlan,” I joked. “I don’t think so. Just make sure that money gets to those researchers as fast as possible.”
“Will do, sir,” he said, before turning to Maisey. “Madam, it was nice to meet you.”
“You too,” she said, her voice pensive and quiet.
“Bye Harlan, have a nice day. Say hello to Joy and kiss the kids for me, okay?”
“You got it, Jesse,” he said, hugging me and giving Maisey a nod before walking out.
I turned back to her and began to stand up, reaching for the crutches.
“You don’t look like you’re in too much pain,” she said.
“Don’t I?” I said, feigning a quick wince.
“Not at all,” she said.
“Well, I am. In case you forgot, I was hit by a damn car. Besides, it’ll be much more comfortable if we work here, don’t you think?”
“We have the most modern, comfortable facility at Steadman Hawkins,” she said, standing in front of me with her hands on her hips, as she watched me struggle with the crutches.
“Yes, but does it have this view?” I said, gesturing towards the balcony.
She turned and blinked when she saw the mountains looming large in the distance, the city of Denver sprawled below us.
“No, it doesn’t,” she admitted. “This is a beautiful place, Jesse. You’ve done well for yourself, haven’t you?”
“Better in some ways than in others… I also have a place in the country out near Ft. Collins, actually. If that appeals to you more, we could go there.”
“No, this is fine,” she said, turning back to me. “I guess we can work here for a few days. You still have to go to Steadman for aquatic therapy.”
“I have a hot tub out on the balcony and there’s a pool downstairs,” I replied, smiling at her. The sun was streaming in through the windows behind her, light glowing through her curls that created a shimmering effect. It was mesmerizing. Her black hair hadn’t greyed a bit, she didn’t seem to have one wrinkle on her face, and her body was curvy but tight and toned. I raked my eyes down her body, drinking in her beauty slowly. She stood watching me, her arms crossed across her chest.
“You have an answer for everything, don’t you?” she asked.
“I try to. Why don’t you sit down?” I said, gesturing to the wrap-around white leather sectional in the middle of the living room. “Let’s talk a bit and catch up. Can I get you something to drink? Beer? Wine?”
“It’s ten o’clock in the morning,” she replied.
“Mimosa then?” I asked. “Bloody Mary?”
She laughed and shook her head.
“Water,” she said.
I fumbled my way over to the kitchen and she stood watching with amusement.
“What?”
“You’re getting around a little better with those than you were the other day,” she said.
“Well, it’s not like I’m getting much help from you,” I said, sliding a bottle of water across the black quartz kitchen island between us.
“My job is to teach you how to be self-sufficient, as well as heal. Your job is to do things for yourself. Why would I do your job for you?” she quipped. For a moment, I even detected the traces of a smile. Maybe she was warming up to me after all.
“What’s the Children’s Heartlink Foundation?” she asked as she opened the bottle of water and took a long drink off of it. My cock began throbbing in my shorts as I watched her lips wrap around the neck of the bottle.
“What?” I asked, shaking the thought from my head.
“The man who was here, he mentioned the Children’s Heartlink Foundation,” Maisey replied.
“It’s a charity I started,” I said, completely distracted by her lips.
“A charity for kids?” she asked.
“Yeah, kids with heart problems. Do you remember my sister, Nina?”
“Yes, I do. How is she?” she asked.
“I guess you didn’t hear… She passed away during my sophomore year at Colorado State.”
Her eyes widened, and she looked at me with such sadness, I felt the urge to comfort her.
“I didn’t know, Jesse, I’m so sorry,” she said.
“Thank you,” I replied, Nina’s face rushing front and center in my mind. I missed her so much every day. “I always wonder what she’d be like now, you know? She was such a great kid.”
“She was, I remember. But… How did she…” she started to gently ask.
“She had a heart condition. We didn’t know until it was too late…”
“I’m so sorry, Jesse, that sounds awful.”
“It was. It was sudden. There was nothing that could be done.”
“I’m so sorry,” she said again, her eyes filling with tears as she looked at me. That was the last thing I wanted - to see Maisey cry. She was so perfect, so fucking beautiful, I never wanted her to be sad, ever.
“It’s okay, thank you,” I said. “Her loss was hard on me, but I’ve poured time and money into giving her a legacy. The charity raises money for research, outreach, and treatment for children across the country. We’re learning more about the causes of childhood heart disease every day. I’m hoping someday we can eradicate it in my sister’s name… Until then, the foundation has been helping fund as many studies and experimental treatments as we can.”
“That’s amazing,” she whispered, wiping her eyes.
“Thanks,” I said, hobbling over to her. I loved being close to her. She was like a museum painting that I wasn’t supposed to touch, and the rule breaking part of me was begging me to reach out and do just that.
To my surprise, she reached out and gently touched my arm.
“You were a good brother. I’m sure she’s looking down and appreciates what you’ve done,” she nodded solemnly, peering into my eyes.
I swallowed hard, her words shooting right through my heart.
“That’s all I can hope for,” I said, attempting a smile. “Nina deserves a piece of her to live on. She was such a caring girl. She wanted to save the world, and I think she’s going to do it…
One patient at a time.”
We stood in the middle of the kitchen, me leaning against the island, trying to pretend my knee wasn’t killing me. I wanted to show her how strong I was. I wanted her to see how good I was doing.
I don’t even know why I cared, but I did. I wasn’t mad at her for standing me up all those years ago, hell, I’d never really been mad at all. It was more like I was worried about her. Here she was standing in front of me, a self-made woman in the flesh - it made me think about starting over. It made me think about possibilities that I hadn’t thought about in a long time. I’d given up the idea of ever settling down with anyone in my life. I wasn’t that kind of a man. Without a doubt, that was just not me.
So why was I having fantasies of running off into the sunset with this woman from my past? I chalked it up to being told no, and pushed away any stupid ideas of it being anything else. I wasn’t getting soft. It was the pain meds talking.
I was Jesse fucking Colorado. The girl in front of me might have been from my past, but she was still just a girl, right?
My cock and my heart continued to fight that debate the rest of the day. We started on my exercises and I let them have at it. In the meantime, I enjoyed the view.
“That feels really amazing today,” I said, as Maisey ran her hands along the inside of my thigh, trailing up towards my groin. “It doesn’t hurt like it did yesterday.”
“Good to hear,” she muttered, digging into my muscle harder. We were on the floor of the living room, and I was lying on my back on a mat she’d brought with her. I didn’t want to embarrass both of us with another raging erection like I had clearly done yesterday, so I was trying to think about everything I could that was not related to how much I wanted to rip those scrubs off and take her right here on the living room floor.
I hated being disabled but it sure was nice having her run her hands all over my legs.
“Why aren’t you married?” I asked, broaching the subject again.