by Nina Loard
“Well, that’s encouraging. We were all dismayed when we heard you’d been lost in an accident. I’m thankful you’re safe and sound, back amongst us. Sometimes though, the past is best left there. Focus on friends, family and good brandy.” He paused and took another pull from his drink. He must not have realized that Ari had known all along that I was alive. “So, congratulations again, Ari, on the engagement. I think you are doing a wise thing. She’ll make a good wife.”
Ari nodded in agreement and thanked Gheorghe for his kind words. I can’t say there was much enthusiasm around the table, though. I was sure Gheorghe noticed.
As the warmth of the brandy spread through me, I realized I was a little tipsy. Champagne, red wine, and brandy were all mixing together in my system, making me almost silly. I locked eyes with Finn and tilted my head, letting him know I was feeling its weight on my neck. He got the message.
“All, I think Evelyn might need to call it a night. She has bags to pack. Gheorghe, it was great to see you and thanks for the brandy. I’ll go get the coats and meet you out front, Evelyn.” Finn was out of his chair and shaking hands goodnight with Ari and Gheorghe.
I looked at my four remaining friends and said, “I guess I won’t see you guys tomorrow. Thank you for tonight and for all the help. Now that it’s time, I don’t want to leave. Please know I’ll be back soon.”
“Yes, you will. We hope right before the new year, Evelyn,” Bounce stated emphatically, not wanting to share too much in front of Gheorghe.
“Right, well, we’ll see.” I hugged Bounce tightly and then Brinks and Raven. They were going to stay behind to hang at the bar. Gheorghe kissed my hand and said goodbye as Ari came up beside me to walk me out. We had passed through one dining room when he came to a stop in a narrow corridor. I stood close to him, not sure of what to expect.
“I want you to know that if you choose not to come to Paris, I’ll help the others understand. It’s a lot to ask of someone who is just getting used to us again. You’re welcome, but, as I said, if you prefer to visit with us later in the year, I will make whatever accommodations I can for you. It has been good having you back, like old times, tonight especially.” He looked down on me with the openness of a friend.
“Thank you. Coming back is going to be tougher. I want to, but I don’t know what to say to people about all of this. I live on my own, but they are going to get curious about my newfound friends. I don’t want to put anyone here in jeopardy or continue to completely lie to everyone back home.”
“Sure, I can understand that.” He nodded politely. The intensity I’d seen in him that first night in the hotel was all but gone. In its place was reserved calm and acceptance. It didn’t match who I thought he was. The engagement, putting an end to being a thief, it was like he was trying to become someone else. I didn’t know him well, but what I had learned didn’t add up.
“Ari, is there something else between us I don’t know about?” The brandy was making me braver than I felt. I watched as his calm reserve melted.
“What do you mean, exactly?” He narrowed his eyes as if to get a better look at my face in the dim light.
“I’m sorry. This isn’t really the time and place. I just see such a change in you over the time I have been here, and I’ve had a few flashes that confuse me. It’s all difficult to understand out of context.” I tried to back up, realizing the liquor was talking, and Ari was not one you wanted to toy with.
“What have you flashed on about me?” My back brushed against the wall, and he stepped closer to keep my focus.
“Nothing… just your eyes that first day. They scared me.” I chickened out from sharing the rest.
“I’m sure there was a lot about me that scared you that day.” He visibly relaxed and smiled his half smile. “Evelyn, we were friends, as we are now. I’m sure Finn is waiting for you. Please enjoy your time with your family, and I’ll wait to hear from Finn on when you might return to us.” He was back to Polite Ari.
“That’s the other thing. I don’t want to upset anyone, but I’m not with Finn. I know he let you believe it and I understand his reasons, but it just isn’t the case. I’m getting to know everyone. I told your uncle that Finn had a key, but he was holding it for me when we went running. It’s not like I don’t like him, I just… I don’t want everyone to think I jumped in bed with him like this.” I was babbling and it felt all wrong telling Ari of all people, but I didn’t sleep with men easily. I, at least, wanted them to know the truth before I left. He took a moment to process what I had revealed to him, his smile fading.
“Evelyn, I’m sure he’s waiting on us. Let me take you to the door.” He turned from me quickly and led the way through the winding restaurant. Finn was there, leaning against the bar, holding my coat and waiting patiently. He read Ari’s expression and stood up straighter, stepping toward us with a look of concern on his face.
“What’s wrong?” He looked to me and then back at Ari’s steely stare.
“We were just telling our friend goodbye. Finn, I’ll see you tomorrow. Evelyn, be safe and Merry Christmas.” Ari pulled me into his arms and held me close to him. His height caused me to tuck my head below his chin and I rested there, against his chest. I closed my heavy eyes for a moment, aware of only the sweater against my cheek and the beat of Ari’s heart. He stepped back from me with his hands on my shoulders, steadying my sway. I looked up into his glistening eyes, unsure of how I could have ever been frightened by them. Now, they had some fire again, not threatening, just focused. This look was more like him, I thought. Well, the him I thought I knew. I wished him a Merry Christmas as Finn helped me into my coat. We waved goodbye and headed out into the winter night.
I placed the side of my face against the cool headrest of Finn’s car and shared my conversation with Ari. “Look, before you get mad, I told Ari we were getting to know each other, but not in the biblical sense. I understand your intentions before, but it isn’t cool just to let people think we are… being intimate.”
“Ah, well, I figured the truth would come out. I wanted him to start accepting you more. It was a way to do that and it worked. I’m sorry if it made you uncomfortable. I shouldn’t have left him to draw his own conclusions.” Finn smiled as he drove, like he was enjoying something.
“What?” I asked, smiling a little myself at his expression.
“Nothing, just wishful thinking.” He turned to look at me, but the glorious smile had faded to something more serious.
“Finn, thank you for taking me back to the hotel. What time should I be ready in the morning?” I shifted back in my seat, keeping my eyes forward. My weakened state could not be trusted with a man like him.
“Not until 10 AM. I’ll be waiting for you out front. I already asked Augustus to get your bags for you.” I thanked him and stared out the window. London at night was even more magical than during the day. The city looked older and more mysterious in the glow of the lamplight. The main streets were just as busy with traffic lights and horns to detract from the ambiance, but the side streets with the stone buildings and gated courtyards gave one a feeling that strange things were lurking in the shadows. It was both beautiful and ominous. I would miss it all. I recognized Albemarle Street and knew we were back. Finn didn’t pull all the way to the front entrance, but found a space on the street several doors down and took it. I didn’t argue.
“Evelyn, before I go.” Finn shifted the Mercedes into park and sat still in his seat while the engine hummed. “I’ll miss you, too. Having you back has been like a miracle.” He turned toward me and his raw, burning emotion was palpable, beating through him with every pulse of his heart.
I lunged for him, listening to all the primal urges that had been screaming at me for days. Without stopping to see if I’d shocked him, I took his face into my hands and kissed him urgently, coaxing his lips apart to taste him again. It didn’t matter if I couldn’t recall years ago. I remembered the other night on the roof top and his kiss had been dizzying. Once h
e caught up to me, he took control of my onslaught, moving hard against my mouth and pulling me closer.
It was so good to be held by him. Finn, I understood. His emotions were on display when it came to me. He wanted me and had cared for me once… cared for me still. I may not have been ready for all of it, but I knew what was coming. Had it not been for the awkward strain of trying to get close to him across the console, the kiss may have moved into something more, but on the eve of my departure I thought it was best to maintain some decorum. I settled back into a kneeling position and focused on his stunned, but pleased expression.
“Um, we need to order brandy more often. Or was there another reason for your assault, not that I’m against it?” He grinned, keeping that potent look of desire on his amazing face.
“It’s the brandy, and all the kindness you’ve shown me, and our kiss the other night. I wanted to make sure I remembered it right.”
“And, in comparison, how’d I do?”
“The reality far surpassed the memory.”
With an anxious smile, he turned off the engine and jumped out of the car. I opened my door and he pulled me out, into his arms.
“I thought we’d try again without the emergency brake,” he sighed in my ear.
“Oh, is that what that was?” I smiled wickedly as he put my feet down on the ground, holding me firmly against him. He tilted my chin up, gazing at me with those stormy eyes, and we began again, slower, but with commitment. His warm hands found the edge of my sweater and curled round my waist and up my bare back, pressing me closer. His mouth urged my lips wider, probing deeper with his hot tongue. Just when the kissing almost became too much, he broke away and found the tender curve of my neck, using his soft mouth and teeth as he released his passion. I plunged my arms under his jacket and sweater, grasping at his solid, muscular back, letting him know I wanted more.
With a low moan, he turned me so that my back was against the SUV and pressed himself against the length of me, finding my lips again. With one hand, he glided his fingers across my stomach while the other held me to him. My breathing escalated as his hand slid over and cupped my breast. There on a dark street, in the heart of London, I lost control as his coat shielded me from any interested passersby. I breathed heavily against him as his finger traced along the sensitive skin of my breasts at the edge of the lace.
I moved my lips to his neck and bit him teasingly. He smelled like the burning wood from the fireplace with a hint of something sweeter. I felt all of him, hard against me. My own body was like liquid fire. He pulled back from me slightly, watching me as his hand drifted slowly down my stomach. I would have given anything in that moment for it to keep going, unbuttoning my jeans and exploring what he had awakened within me. But, he held there, tracing his fingers across my flaming skin, with a touch of a smile on his ruby lips.
“Evelyn, any more of this and I will take you right here, in front of the good people of London.” His voice was hoarse from the strain of stopping.
“And that’s probably a bad thing, right?” A part of me couldn’t have cared less where we were. However, I knew I was going to be on a plane in less than twelve hours. I also remembered all of my good reasons as to why moving quickly with Finn was a bad idea. Well, I couldn’t really recall them at the time, but I knew I had some. The one thing I did think of was I didn’t want to lose him by moving too quickly. I wasn’t sure I could manage a relationship with a thief who lives in another country, as much as I wanted to consummate it right there on the street.
He bent to me, languidly kissing my neck, and whispered in my ear, “Wrong perhaps, but in no way bad.” I felt his smile against my lips before he deepened our kiss. Before I lost the battle with myself, I gently pushed him away so I could speak… think.
“Finn, I have no memory of anything that could top that kiss. It may bother you that I don’t remember the ones, years ago, but that one I will keep forever. I have to go before I try to make you outdo yourself again. I don’t think I could take it.” I pulled my sweater down gently after he withdrew his hands. He pulled me to him for a final, more appropriate hug. I felt his heart racing as fast as mine, and we stayed like that, leaning on each other, until both began to slow.
Before he left me at the entrance to the hotel, he kissed me again, swiftly on the cheek. “Good night, Evelyn. I’ll see you in the morning. Sweet dreams.” He took a few steps back, watching me with a wide grin before disappearing down the sidewalk. After throwing myself into packing, I lay on my bed and committed every bit of that last half hour to memory, reliving it so I wouldn’t forget. For the first time in my life, that I could remember, real passion coursed through me from the depths of my soul. I had remembered a flash of attraction to Ari in Paris, but Finn had shown me what it could feel like for two people to crave one another. When it came down to wanting that kind of wild desire in my current life, I had no use for the past.
Chapter 17. Back Home
Around noon on December 19th, sitting in my extraordinarily quiet living room in Newport with Brutus, I decided it was time to pack up the BMW and head to Boston. It had been wonderful to come home and sleep in my own bed and microwave things in my own kitchen. I had gone to the Black Pearl with Jasper and Cecelia and given them their Christmas gifts from Harrods. We’d talked for hours about the couple of memories I had had about some old college friends. I kept the details out as much as I could. I didn’t know how much was okay to tell them, so I said my friends were former students, changed their names and edited out any criminal activity. They pressed to see if there had been any romance, then or now, and I declined. Telling them about my feelings for Finn would have sparked a whole new level of interest on their part. I did hint to the fact that I would be going back soon to visit again; I just hadn’t decided when quite yet.
Jasper did end up getting a promotion at the hotel after I left. I was happy for him, genuinely, though he had a hard time talking about it like it was something he was proud of. I tried to convince him it didn’t bother me. I couldn’t remember being upset about losing my job. There were so many more interesting things to worry about; seeking employment was way down the list. In the midst of a holiday week and down one employee, he was incredibly busy at work. I remembered the feeling all too well. It made me look forward to a lazy Christmas at home with my mother and Steve all the more.
Cecelia and her family left for Florida shortly after I returned home. It was great to catch up with her before she went. She had taken good care of Brutus in my absence, as expected. He seemed happy to be home, but he was happy anywhere as long as there was food in a dish and hands to stroke him. Real estate had really slowed over the holidays and it had been almost non-existent before. Cecelia was considering going back to school to finish her nursing degree now that her boys were older. Earle thought she was overreacting and assured her things would pick up. She wagered he didn’t want to take over the chores of motherhood while she was in school. They were going to discuss it while visiting her parents in Sarasota.
Their stories reminded me of our trip to the fortune teller. Gypsy or not, she certainly had gotten some things right; Jasper’s promotion, though he hadn’t mentioned a dark man from his past yet, and Cecelia having some debate within her marriage over her career. It could be coincidence, but the partial accuracy was eerie. Something had indeed come to find me as well, but I wouldn’t let myself think about the other part of her warning.
With Cecelia and Jasper out of the picture, there hadn’t been much to entertain me. Finn had called a couple times to see how I was doing. He had made me keep the international cell phone, but I returned the British passport before the flight. I’m sure he could hear in my voice that I was lonely. Having a job really fills your days. Without one, I had no idea what I was supposed to do. Finn really wanted me to come to Paris, and more and more, I wanted to go. There were two things holding me back.
First, lying to everyone about my new friends had bothered me. I felt like any minute I was g
oing to stumble over some fib I had told and have to tell three others to make the story make sense, or I would simply blurt out something real and wind up getting us all put in jail. I knew logically that I wasn’t going to do either of those things, but I hated not being able to tell the truth about my experience and share the details with the people I cared about. My time in London, and the couple of things I had remembered, were important to me. I was close to remembering more and that excited me, but I had to downplay all of it for everyone’s good. Another trip would mean more lies.
Second, I had learned something that troubled me. The flight home started out as uneventful. After Finn kissed me goodbye, I had boarded the plane, a little embarrassed by how brazen I had been the night before. I spent the early part of the flight feeling like I may have let my passion for Finn burn a little too bright, too quickly. Maybe it was smart to stay where we were on the intimacy scale. It was easier to feel like that was possible now that he was going to be thousands of miles away. Already, I had felt myself missing him and it disturbed me almost as much as it pleased me.
A couple hours into the flight, Captain Kelly came out of the cockpit and chatted in the galley with Sara for a while, poured himself some coffee, and then came to sit beside me. He was a large, older man, fit and solid like a former football player. He straightened his tie after he sat. As we made pleasant conversation, I remembered a comment that Finn had made about him and his relationship with Ari.
“I hear you knew Ari’s father in Scotland,” I said.
“Yes, I used to fly for him back in the day even. We went to school together. He was older than me, but we always got along. My children and Ari went to the same school. Did he tell you that?”
“No, Finn just told me you would do anything for Ari.” I fished to understand the relationship better. Ari was a compelling guy, but there had to be more than charisma at work.