by Jojo Brown
“They will help you, Eluna, they have been helping you all along. They have been watching out for us both the whole time. Remember, Ella! You have to remember!”
Adam jumped up from the couch and began pacing around the small room, touching everything he passed. His fingers were in constant motion as he mumbled a litany of seemingly disjointed numbers. The same ones repeated over and over again.
None of it made any sense to me. I figured he was just rambling again, because I had agitated him somehow, but he did know about the amulet and my other name … how was that possible?
“Adam, honey, calm down. It will be okay. Come sit down and talk to me, I have missed you.”
I gently coaxed him back to the sofa. He was whispering the same sequence of numbers and mathematical equations, but at least he seemed to be a little less upset.
“Adam, how did you know that Nanny gave me the necklace?” I asked him softly, even though Chris was giving me a look that screamed to tread lightly.
I had to try to get through to Adam; he obviously had some information locked away in his memories. I needed to tap into those, somehow … right then!
“I knew because, I knew,” he stated simply, as if that should be abundantly clear to anyone listening.
“But, how did you know, Adam? Did Dad tell you?”
“Of course not, Dad never tells me anything anymore, he thinks I am too stupid to be allowed to know anything. He never used to think that, before they took Mum away. He always trusted me before that.
“He trusted me to hold her. He trusted me to help keep you safe. I was always the one that was trusted, she even trusted me with the numbers. She said that it was important.
“Remember the numbers, Adam. Always remember the numbers. If you do not remember anything else in your whole life, remember the numbers.
“That’s what she said, and I have never forgotten them. They are the most important part of this whole thing. And, I was trusted to remember them. They are my numbers. I took care of them!
“Not you!
“Me!
“They trusted me!
“You were too little, I guess. They couldn’t give you the numbers; you would have got them all mixed up.
“But not me!
“I remembered them!
“If you don’t remember anything else in your whole life, remember those numbers. That’s what she said, and I did.”
“Mum told you to remember the numbers? Before she left?” I was getting even more confused.
“No, not Mum, Ella. She didn’t want anything to do with the truth; she just wanted you to be a regular little girl. ‘The Lady’ told me.”
“What lady? Adam?”
“The one who came to the house with the pink hat, of course. Every Sunday she came to test you. She put her pink hat on the stand in the front hall; it was the signal to the rest of them that it was test day. They all knew what it meant and they would come to watch the tests.”
Chris was looking to me for answers; I just shrugged my shoulders. I had no idea what Adam was talking about. I did not remember ever going through tests, except in school.
“Adam, I can’t remember anyone coming over to the house to test me. Do you know who she was?”
“Sure! She still comes to see me every month, on the first Saturday of the month. She brings me things. Last month she brought me a new baseball cap, and she says that we are gonna go see a game in the summer again.
“She is getting old too. I hope she doesn’t have to go in a box.”
Knowing that I could easily find out from the staff who this woman was that was visiting Adam, I decided to move on.
“Adam, can you tell me the numbers now? I promise to never lose them. Nanny trusted me with the amulet, so maybe you could trust me with the numbers too.”
He turned back to me, with a look of shock on his face. As his eyes began to glisten with tears, he whispered, “Of course I trust you. I always have, we all have. To not trust you would be foolish and I am no fool.”
Reaching out, he took my hands between his and knelt on the floor in front of me. “You are the one, Ella. You are more important than all the rest. You will make the rejoining happen, and everything will be made right. Your caretakers should never have been allowed to stifle you.
“They hid you away. They kept you away from the world, out there on that God-forsaken farm, in the middle of nowhere.
“They sent me away, so that I could no longer help you find the way. But, they could not take away the numbers and now it is my greatest honor to give them to you.”
As I sat there dumbfounded, staring at this man in front of me, he turned to Chris.
“Mark it down on paper and be sure to mark it all down exactly as I say it. It is more important than you will ever know.”
Turning his eyes back to me, he started rambling off the same list of numbers and mathematical equations that he had been saying before. This time though, he was extremely calm. He was not the same person anymore. He did not stammer or mumble. He had no twitches or ticks. His eyes were perfectly clear, with none of the confusion or fear that had fogged them for so many years.
When he finished dictating the numbers to Chris, he stood and pulled me up to stand with him. The Adam that I knew, the one who hated to be touched and would never willingly touch another person, except with the tips of his fingers, was gone. My scared, confused brother no longer existed.
The stranger standing in front of me stood straighter, spoke with authority and eloquence, and had the look of someone who had been relieved of a great burden after a long time. He wrapped his arms around me and held me close, for the first time that I could remember. Placing a soft, loving kiss upon my tear-stained cheek, he whispered, “It’s time to go home.”
With that, he reached behind the sofa, pulled out a small suitcase he had hidden there and headed to the kitchen. He was only gone for a few minutes when he returned to the living room, followed closely by the administrator.
“What is this all about?” she demanded.
Chris and I were still standing, exactly as we had been when Adam walked away. I think we were both in a state of shock. I just looked at the irate woman, trying to get my mind around everything that had just happened.
“Adam just informed me that he is leaving,” Mrs. Brock told me, as though I should know how to handle the situation.
Adam was the one who actually spoke to her. “Has something happened in the past few years, of which I am unaware, Mrs. Brock? I was of the understanding that my staying here was voluntary. It has always been stipulated to me that I would be free to come and go as I saw fit. Has that fact changed, without my knowledge?”
It only took a moment for Mrs. Brock to regain her composure; she was clearly as shaken by the dramatic change in Adam as we were. “You are not a prisoner here, Adam. If you are deemed capable by someone in authority, you can leave.”
“By someone in authority, do you mean a doctor?”
“Yes, Adam, that is precisely what I mean.”
“Well, Dr. McLean here is my family’s physician, he was brought here by my sister, whom I understand is on the record as my next of kin; therefore it would stand to reason that he has full authority over this matter.” Adam informed her, turning to Chris.
“Oh, well… yes… but…” Mrs. Brock stammered.
Without missing a beat, Chris pulled his pen from his pocket, clicked it open and said, “Now, if you have some forms for me to sign before Adam leaves, I would appreciate you retrieving them.”
* * * *
Walking out the front door on the arm of the new version of my beloved brother, I felt as though the world was spinning wildly out of control beneath my feet. When we reached Chris’ truck, Adam opened the door for me to get in.
As I silently took my seat, he leaned in to place another kiss on my cheek. “I will not be traveling with you. There is much, which I want to see. I shall make my own way home and I shall see you soon my sweet,
sweet, Ella.”
Straightening, he looked over the top of the door to Chris. “Take her to see Aunt Rachel. She can help, I believe.”
As he turned to walk away, I grabbed the sleeve of his jacket, “But how will you get home? I thought we would be able to…”
“I know what you thought, Ella, but we both have paths that we must travel, and they go in different directions, for now. Have no fear, I have plenty of money in my bank account, I will be more than able to make my own way home.”
As I stood there on the snow-packed sidewalk with Chris, watching Adam walk away, I felt myself falling. The blackness that engulfed me was complete and there was no way for me to fight against it, I had to simply give myself over to it—allow it to carry me away!
Twenty-one
Absolute blackness!
I was so cold, scared, and alone!
I did not know where I was or how I had gotten there. There was nothing but the harsh, thick blackness around me.
It was hard to breathe. I felt like I was drowning. The blackness was so thick; my lungs were not strong enough to pull it in.
I could feel my heart pounding in my chest. I was so scared. I was trapped in the darkness, alone and lost.
Where was everyone?
Where was Chris?
Where was I?
Suddenly there was movement within the void. Blacker forms were moving through the darkness, like shadows in the night. Two of them were moving around me.
Then, somewhere in the distance, far off to my left, a light appeared. At first, it was nothing more than a pinprick of a lighter degree of darkness, but as I watched, it grew and intensified.
As the orb of light gained in size and momentum, I was able to make out a faint form in front of it. Someone was moving towards me from within that soft light. It was a woman, tall and slender, with soft hair that moved in a breeze, which I could not feel.
She moved close to my side, but with the light coming from behind her, I was unable to see any of the details, which were her. She was just a silhouette of radiating light in a world of darkness. I was sure that this was someone that I knew. Before she even spoke to me, I felt certain I would recognize her voice.
Her soft whispery voice fell upon my ears as water onto the lips of a man lost in the desert.
“Do not be afraid, my sweet child. There may be many mysteries ahead of you, held within the darkness of the unknown, but there are even more mysteries in the light. Those are the ones that are waiting for you. You must strive for those.
“None of the mysteries of either plane is to be feared, by you. Know that you are on your way. Greatness unknown is waiting for you, as are we.
“You know what you have to do, you just have to remember. It is all within you; allow the memories to surface. Let go of the fear. Stand firm in the knowledge that it shall all be made clear to you soon. Know that the others are with you, you are not alone … never alone.”
I knew that my lips did not move, but I somehow asked her, “Who are you? Where are we and why is it so very dark? I don’t like it here. I want to go home; I want to be with Chris, where it is safe.”
“The answers to all of those questions are already within you. Your fear of the unknown is holding them down. Let go of the fear. Let go of the past. You have the key. The time is drawing near for the rejoining.
“Trust yourself. Trust those who love you. While they may have gone about it all the wrong way, they have done their best to protect you, your whole life. Most importantly … trust us!”
Another voice broke in, blocking hers out. I did not want to hear that voice. I wanted her to stay with me. I wanted her to keep talking. Her presence made me feel safe. Somehow, I knew that nothing in this blackness could harm me as long as she was at my side. As I watched, she began to move away, back towards the soft, misty light.
I wanted to go with her. I called out to her, begging her to take me with her. As she whispered that we would be together soon enough, the light absorbed her.
The other voice had made her leave. The man who was speaking forced his way between us. I didn’t want her to go; why did he have to make her leave? Why couldn’t he just have stayed away and left us alone in the mist? Who was he anyway?
As I turned my head to yell at this stranger, the darkness began to fade. Light exploded, filling the space around me. Sounds assaulted my ears as the light seared into my eyes.
The shadowy forms from the darkness were still there in the light, but they had begun to take shape, become solid. I could not bear to look at them, the light bouncing off them caused unbearable pain.
I could hear him speaking again.
He was calling me by name, telling me to open my eyes. I could not understand how he knew my name. I did not know why he would want me to open my eyes.
Did he know that the light was causing a searing pain to burn its way through my head?
Did he know that it felt as though two white-hot daggers were piercing my brain through my eyes?
Did he care?
Was he hurting me on purpose?
If I kept my eyes closed long enough, would the pain go away? Would he?
I heard him calling again. Closer this time, “Ella, Ella, open your eyes, honey.”
He sounded concerned, but that could be a deception. Whoever he was, he could be trying to make me submit to him, so that he could hurt me more.
I wanted to stay in the mists that were surrounding me. I did not want to go anywhere near the searing, painful whiteness of the light. I did not want to go back to the fearsome blackness of the dark. I wanted to just stay in the soft mist, between the two.
It was safe in the mist. It was comforting and warm, like a soft feather duvet covering on a well-known bed. Like being in the arms of a trusted lover; knowing that you are protected from all harm. It may have been nothing more than an illusion, but it was a comforting illusion that I tried my best to hold onto.
“Ella, please come back to me. It’s Chris. Open your eyes honey. Come on, Ella, please open your eyes.”
Finding my voice, I whispered, “It’s so warm here, Chris. Where are you? I can’t see you.”
Open your eyes, sweetheart, I am right in front of you.”
“It hurts,” I tried to explain to him. “The light hurts my head, it’s too bright.”
I heard him moving around and then I felt him beside me again, “I closed all the shades, you can open your eyes now.”
Slowly, I did open my eyes. The pain was still there, but nowhere near as bad as it had been earlier. As Chris came into focus, I could see the worry, etched on his face. A soft smile moved over his lips. “You had us quite worried.”
“Where are we?” I slowly looked around the room. It all seemed very familiar to me, but I could not quite place it.
“Adam insisted that we bring you straight to your Aunt Rachel’s house. You are in the bed in her guest room.”
At the mention of Adam, everything came rushing back to me. The amulet, Nanny’s story, my mother, the drastic change in Adam. All of it flooded over me in a wave that shook me to the bone.
“I passed out.”
Gently swiping a piece of hair out of my face, Chris told me that I had been unconscious for almost two days. He and Adam had taken me to Rachel’s, where the three of them had taken care of me. Adam was in the next room and Aunt Rachel had just left to get my father.
A sudden rush of panic came over me. I knew that I only had a certain amount of time left before things had to be sorted out and I had wasted two of them.
“I have to get up. I have wasted enough time, Chris! It’s time to get serious. It is imperative that I get all of the answers as soon as I can. I don’t know why it’s so important; I just know that it is!”
As I forced myself to sit on the side of the bed, my head swam and a sharp pain stabbed the side of my skull.
Chris wrapped his arm around my waist to steady me. “Take it easy, Ella. You hit your head, hard, when you went down
. You have a nice goose egg there on the side of your head. You’re probably going to be dizzy for a while, but you will be okay.”
Adam stepped through the door. “Hey, baby sister. You just about ready to get back to work? You have a lot to do and not much time left.”
When Chris tried to protest, I stilled him with a light touch on his knee, “No, Chris, Adam’s right. I am going to need your help though. And I need to talk to Aunt Rachel.”
The front door shut with a bang, right then and I heard Rachel and Dad in the hall. My wonderful aunt stuck her head in the door. “Oh good, you’re up. I think we have everything ready in the living room. Maybe something to eat and drink first, though.”
With that, she was gone again.
That was my Aunt Rachel… always in a big rush and always feeding everyone.
Twenty-two
Aunt Rachel always did make the very best vegetable soup in these parts. She’d even won a bunch of blue ribbons at the county fair, for it. The big bowlful that she brought me that day though, tasted even better than usual. Perhaps it was because I was so ravenously hungry.
I did not waste one second emptying that bowl. I even used the warm, freshly baked roll to sop up every drop of the mouth-watering broth.
Chris had stayed with me while I ate. When I finished emptying the bowl and filling my grumbling belly, I lifted my eyes to find him watching me. He had a very amused look on his face.
“So much for being ‘oh so ladylike’ all the time, and eating like a bird to retain your girlish figure,” his chuckle warmed me nearly as much as the soup. “It’s nice to see you actually know how to let your guard down once in a while. Those veggies never stood a chance against you. Your assault on them was both thorough and complete. They never even saw you coming.”
We were both laughing as he passed me a steaming cup of tea. Sitting beside me on the soft bed, he leaned over and lovingly kissed my brow. “I have never seen you look so beautiful as you do right now.”